extracted text

$ 2.25

VISIONS
August/September 1989

Lesbians must take the power within and manifest it without
by Terri Jewell
once upon a time, there was a dream
a dream of women, a dream of women
coming together and turning the world
around. turning the world around and making it over
a dream of women, all women being sisters.
a dream of caring; a dream of protection, a dream
ofpeace.
-PatParker, 1978
Black Lesbian Feminist poet Pat Parker is dead of breast
canceratage45. Wheniarrivedatthe15thNWMFinBloomington
this year, I hoped to hear her read, hoped to attend her workshop.
I wanted to see her sit on a panel of other Lesbian foremothersZBudapest, Del Martin,PhyllisLyon, Kay Gardner, Sonia Johnson
and Merlin Stone. This astounding group of women represent
many decades of Lesbian struggle, 'thought and culture.
ButPatParkercouldnotbe there. She wasdead2 weeks later.
I remember my own rearing as a dyke from the time I came out
in 1976. I was in college in New Jersey during a period when
Lesbian visibility and "coming out" were the biggest issues.
Lesbians consistently led the way in all concerns of the Women's

Movement, including children's
rights, the implications of
pornography, poor women's health,
domestic violence, abortion, and equal
pay. Lesbians were also constructing
the foundations of our own culture
while discovering and preserving our
herstories. I rapidly grew strong
within myself as a Lesbian then and
have carried the seeds of what I
learned. These seeds of commitment
and perseverance multiply despite the
Pat Parker
post-Reagan conservatism that is fed
by such catchwords as "family," (Photo by Martha Dunham)
"church," "flag," "morality,"
"stability," "patriotism," and "traditional values." There is an
effort now to suppress societal change that brings about increased
human rights and participation in a society maintained for the
benefit of white male privilege. It is within such an environment
that Lesbians must continue to work for survival today and the
future. We cannot afford to become lax in our vigilance or
continued on page 6

Homophobia: a personal and political perspective
by Rosemary Rocco
Homophobia is defined in many ways by many people and
often it seems we are speaking about the behaviors that occur, or
the stereotyping and bigotry that feed homophobia, rather than the
examining the basic concept of the phobia. Quite simply, homophobia is the fear of loving someone of the same gender. It is not
a fear of a certain sexuality nor a fear of specific sex acts.
This distinction is rather important, not only in addressing
external homophobia, but also in addressing internal homophobia,
if we are really interested in affecting fear. The fear of loving
someone of the same gender or of those who love someone of the
same gender is supported by stereotypes and bigoted belief systems. The stereotype is carried out by assuming that Lesbians and
Gays are always looking for "a lay" and is sustained with thought
patterns that focus on what Gays and Lesbians do in bed and only
on what they do in bed. Ifwe can begin to talk about stereotyping
and bigotry as the ways that homophobia is carried out and

sustained, rather than bringing our private sexual lives into public,
we can then effectively talk about the phobia for what it is irrational fear.
In responding to internal homophobia, I believe that we must
also look at our own internal focus on defining our relationships
by the amount, quality and kind of sexual expression. In the
history of addressing Lesbian oppression, we talk as a movement
about wanting our privacy respected and our right to carry out
freedoms guaranteed to us as citizens, and yet it seems that we
often go about this by making our private lives public and by
demanding public sanction for a private act. In this we include a
range of sexual expression that is not necessarily accepted within
a heterosexual context and which represents small slices of a small
slice of the whole range of human expression. In this I include
sexual relationships with people under eighteen, non-monogamy,
continued on page 8

Page2

LAVENDER VISIONS

August/September 1989

Escorts endure threats to protect women's right to choose
[The Supreme Court decision threatening to limit a woman's right
to choose how she controls her own body has engendered increased violence from the anti-choice forces. We wish to thank
and affirm our sisters in the trenches, many ofwhom are suffering
from combat fatigue. -LV Staff]

Some describe what has been happening in Ft. Wayne,
Indiana, in front of the Women's Health Organization as a "war."
It is there that the battle lines have been drawn between the prochoice and anti-choice sides of the abortion issue. For many,
however, the issue is not just about abortion, but about reproductive rights and the rights of women to have control over their own
lives.
The Women's Health Organization has been providing health
care services, including abortions, to women since the 1970s. For
almost as long, anti-choice groups have picketed the clinic and
have harassed and attempted to prevent patients from entering the
clinic. "Street counselors," a self-designated term of the antichoice group, confront patients and their family and friends when
entering the clinic, shouting such things as "It's not too late" or
"Don't kill your baby." They also try to force literature, including
pictures of dead fetuses, upon these patients. While one or more
"street counselors" engage in this harassment, other anti-choice
individuals march on the sidewalk in front of the clinic singing
hymns and quoting scripture.
What comes between the anti-choice picketers and "street
counselors" and the women attempting to enter the clinic is a group
which has come to be known as the pro-choice escorts. The escorts
meet women as they arrive, surround them and escort them to the
door of the clinic. They attempt to drown out the verbal harassment from the "street counselors" and to prevent plastic fetuses
and bloody pictures of aborted fetuses from being shoved into the
faces of women entering the clinic. Often, it is the escorts
themselves who are shoved and also verbally harassed.
The Women's Health Organization was one of the first clinics
in the country to be picketed and it is also one of the very few
clinics which has not been shut down by a "rescue." Operation
Rescue of Northeastern Indiana has hit the Women's Health
Organization twice within recent months. Both times hundreds of
anti-choice demonstrators sat on the sidewalk in front of the clinic
and attempted to block the entranceway to prevent patients from
entering the clinic.
During the first "rescue" on April 21, approximately 300 "rescuers" arrived at the clinic at 6:30 AM and attempted to "take" the
building. Escorts had received word of a possible "rescue" and
had arrived at 5 AM to erect a temporary plywood barricade.
Patients were kept in vans in a church parking lot across the street
while the police took nearly three hours to arrest approximately
100 anti-choice demonstrators. "Street counselors" circled the
vans holding plastic fetuses and bloody pictures up to the windows
and had to be stopped by police.
Police intervention is minimal - the job of securing the clinic
building and assuring that patients are able to enter the clinic is
done by the escorts. Often it is necessary for escorts to surround

a patient, who may choose to have a blanket thrown over her head
to avoid being photographed by anti-choice picketers. Escorts
walk the patient several hundred feet past shouting picketers and
between two mounted police stationed at the entranceway to the
clinic.
The pro-choice escorts are a diverse group of women and
men, the majority being women, and a significant number of these
are from the Ft. Wayne Lesbian community. The escorts have
been doing the work of the police, and many are struggling with
the feeling of being burned out. It is very difficult in this brief
article to convey the feelings experienced by an escort. Carolyn
Clark, volunteer coordinator for the escorts, sums up her feelings
in this way: "When I first said I would go to the clinic and help,
I didn 'tthink I would get involved to this extent. It is unbelievable
to me that people can treat patients the way they do and get away
with it. No one can really grasp what happens until you 're there."
Individuals are strongly encouraged to come to the clinic on
procedure days and observe just what does happen. Additional
information, including videotapes from past procedure days are
available through Ft. Wayne Feminists, P.O. Box 10267, Ft.
Wayne, IN 46851, or call (219) 456-5244 or (219) 432-4523. In
Indianapolis, the Indiana Pro-Choice Action League {IPCAL) will
be holding training classes for new escorts in the early fall; contact
Beth Lowery at (317) 283-6033 for more information. Merrillville
Planned Parenthood (219-769-3500) is the contact for information
on clinic escorts in northwest Indiana.

VISIONS

Statement of Purpose
Lavender Visions is
for me and for you,
for all Lesbians,
for us to connect within
our larger community
so that together we may increase
our respect and support
for each other and ourselves,
affirming, celebrating and
honoring the women we are.

Published bi-monthly by Solstice Seed. Mailing address: Lavender
Visions, P.O. Box 321, Zionsville, IN 46077. The opinions
expressed in Lavender Visions do not necessarily reflect the views
of the publishers and editors.
Publishers ............ Mary Gaul (M.G.), Nancy VanArsdall Jones
Managing Editor .............................................. Candace Shearls
Editors ................. D.J. Gridley, Pat Jordan, Mary Ann Steinhart
Advertising Coordinator .......................................... Ruth Peters
Mail Subscriptions
Subscriptions are available at $8-12 a year. Advertising rates
available on request. Send address corrections to address above.

August/September 1989

Page3

LAVENDER VISIONS

Bulletin Board
MichiganWomyn'sFestival: August9-13;contactW.W.T.M.C.,
Box 22, Walhalla, MI 49458, or call (616) 757-4766.
Older Women's Network (O.W.N.): Tuesday, August 15, 7:30
PM. Maryann Steinhart will teach and demonstrate message
therapy. Sue and Sherry are hosts. For more information, call
(317) 786-5845 or write O.W.N., P.O. Box 2528, Indianapolis, IN 46206.
Lesbian Discussion Group: Donna from P-FLAG will lead a
discussion on mother-daughter relationships at the group's
regular meeting, August 31, 7-8:30 PM. Call (317) 577-2245.
Labor Day Picnic: September 3, noon-6 PM, Westlake Park,
Indianapolis, IN. Sponsored by Unicom Club.
ICLU Annual Conference and Dinner: September 23. Conference 9: 30 AM - 5: 30 PM, Indiana University School of Law,
Indianapolis. Workshop topics include: "The War on Drugs:
An Assault on Civil Rights?", "After Webster: The Current
State ofReproductiveRights,""Access to the Courts," "Civil
Rights of the Mentally Ill," "Is There Justice for Juveniles?",
and "Censorship and the First Amendment." For more
information, call the ICLU office (317) 635-4059.

Branching Out Productions Presents:
The Old Holly is Back: Holly Near in concert Sunday afternoon,
October 8, Shortridge Jr. High Performing Arts Center.
Tickets will be available at Dreams & Swords.
Breaking Free from Overeating & Compulsive Eating, an intensive one-day workshop, October 28.
Claudia Black, Adult Children of Alcoholics, a day-long
'seminar for children of alcoholics and/or other drug
dependencies, November 3, 9 AM - 4 PM.
[For more information about any Branching Out Production,
call (317) 637-2906.]
Nancy Brooks and Jane Winslow in Performance: Tentatively
scheduled for October 21. See the October/November 1989
issue of Lavender Visions for more details.
"Something's Brewing": "Something's Brewing" Women's
Coffeehouse meets the first Saturday of each month at 7:30
PM at 615 West43rd Street (Unitarian UniversalistChurch).
For information about programs, cost and schedule changes,
call (317) 274-2585.

RESOURCES
Indianavolis (317)
AIDS Hotline: 257-HOPE, answered 7-11 PM, every evening.
AIDS: Living the Journey Together: a family therapy group for
persons with AIDS and a care partner, parent, sibling, lover,
friend. Sponsored by Courageous Living Counseling Ser.vices, located in Westview Hospital Professional Bldg., 9250043.
Dignity meets at St. Thomas Aquinas Church, 46th & Illinois,
Sundaysat6PM; P.O. Box 431, Indianapolis, IN 46202; 9246578 (Drew).
Friends for Lesbian and Gay Concerns (Quaker); 635-8646
(Diane or Perri).
Gay AA meets at Bethlehem Lutheran, Sundays at 7 PM; 6327864.
Gay/Lesbian Switchboard: 253-GA YS (7 - 11 PM).
Gay and Lesbian Codependents Anonymous meets at Winona
Hospital, 3232 N. Meridian St.; 925-1135 (Don), 636-4986
(Joe), 297-0386 (Pam).
Gay Parents Coalition oflndianapolis meets at Holy Eucharist
Church, 38th & Illinois, 2nd Sunday of each month at 7:30
PM; 253-2280 (John)
Indianapolis Youth Group for Lesbian and gay youth ages 23
and under meets bi-weekly. For more information call
Lesbian/Gay Switchboard at 253-GA YS and ask for the
organization's contact person.
Indianapolis NOW meets at Planned Parenthood, 3219 N. Meridian, 2nd Wednesday of each month at 6:30 PM; 925-4641.
Indianapolis Pitch-In: Our monthly pitch-in dinners provide

social and networking opportunities for all Lesbians. Generally, the pitch-in is scheduled for the second Friday of each
month, beginning at 7 PM. The location (and directions, if
necessary) usually is available at Dreams and Swords at least
a week before each pitch-in.
Integrity meets at All Saints Church, 16th and Central, Mondays
at 6:30 PM; 635-3744.
Justice, Inc.: Lesbian resource for issues regarding state laws,
community/police relations, civil rights, Lesbian/Gay conferences, other special events. 1534 E. 10th St., Indianapolis,
IN 46201, 634-9212.
Lesbian Discussion Group: Next meeting August 31. Beginning
in September, will meet 2nd and 4th Thursday of each month,
7- 8:30PM, at6360 N. Guilford; 253-5160 (NancyVanArsdall Jones).
Lesbian Incest Survivors Therapy Group. Contact Linda
Gensheimer, (219) 426-5778 (Fort Wayne).
Older Women's Network for Women Over 40 meets at 5602
Wagon Wheel Trail, 3rd Tuesday of each month; 786-5845.
Overeaters Anonymous (for men and women) meets at Dreams
and Swords, 828 E. 64th Street, Fridays at 6:30 PM, 2539966.
P-FLAG (Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays) meets at
Butler University in Atherton Center,Room 312, 2nd Sunday
of each month at 2:00 PM; 251-9307 (Donna).
University Gay/Lesbian Alliance meets at 3754 N. Illinois St.
(Lambda Center). Call 274-2585.
continued on page 9

Page4

LAVENDER VISIONS

August/September 1989

Attorney relies on self-acceptance, self-confidence in life
Marie knew as a child that she wanted to be a trial lawyer. She
also knew she was a Lesbian.
At 30, several years into her law career, she is a successful
attorney working on social justice issues and is a woman who
accepts her Lesbianism as a natural part of herself. Both accomplishments are the direct result of a great deal of self- confidence
and the ability to focus on a goal, heading almost single-mindedly
toward it.
Marie grew up in Indianapolis, the oldest of four children in
a middle-class Catholic family. She describes her parents as
supportive of her goals and the source of a major portion of her
self-confidence. Thanks to them and a progressive school environment, she never went through the believing-she-couldn't-dosomething-stage. Good grades, athletic honors, involvement in
school activities and politics - anything Marie set her mind to,
she achieved. Boys? Dating? Marie had neither time nor interest
in them. "I remember boys were brats," she says. She hung out
with the boys on her AAU swim team and went to dances with
them because she liked to dance. But date? Go steady? No
interest. Her relationships with girls, however, were somewhat
different. There were intense emotional relationships that Marie
now recognizes as "falling in love." And at the all-women schools
she attended right through college, intense female friendships
were the norm. No one questioned or expected that the friendship
went further, so Marie
never faced isolation or
ridicule because of her
*WEARE*
sexual affectional preferEVERYWHERE
ence.
Herexperienceinthe
professional world is similar, where she's risen quickly to the supervisory and managerial
position she holds today. She does not openly talk about her sexual
affectional preference at work; neither does she hide it. Marie
believes that her Lesbianism has helped her in the work world.
While heterosexual women often flounder in confusion over their
relationship to their male bosses and colleagues, she has used her
self-confidence and sense of focus to produce results. She is proud
of the fact that at 30 she has been instrumental in making new law
and setting precedents.
"Power is a perception," says Marie. "In order for people to
have power over you, you have to be afraid of the consequences."
Marie clearly is not, and yet she recognizes that some people have
greater fear oflosing their jobs and therefore must acquiesce to the
"system" more than she does. "We are a minority who has to make
a decision about identifying ourselves," she says. And she
believes there is room for working within the system. Both
radicals and moderates need one another, she believes, and at this
time she has chosen to be a moderate working within, affecting
needed changes.
Yet she recognizes the changes in herself. Just a month before
this interview, she "came out" to her parents: shock and a promise
to deal with it from one, less positive response from the other.

Marie is still waiting to see
where the chips will fall as
time goes by.
Why did she choose
this time to tell them? She
says it became too easy to
go on believing that the
perfect time would come.
She has been working on
family issues, and continuing to keep that secret
touched the core of her
integrity.
"I am working on living as honestly as possible,
and accepting the consequences of this commitment. This commitment is an ongoing
struggle between my own fears and my own abilities to act," she
says.
And as she becomes more honest with her family about her
life-style, she feels herself moving toward doing more work in the
Lesbian community and becoming more political.
Marie is a person who has always figured out what she's
wanted, gone after it and gotten it. Now she is learning to accept
that she doesn't always know what she wants, that she doesn't
have to know, and that what she wants is constantly changing.
"I'm learning to be comfortable and secure with ambiguities," she
says.
Marie acknowledges what to her feels like a huge dent in her
self-confidence, an internal fear that she could, indeed, lose
everything. And her insurance policy against that is a to-death pact
with a friend: neither will allow the other to end up a bag-lady,
dependent on garbage scraps. Somehow this writer doubts that
pact will ever be called upon.

Order some good stuff ...
We have the following high-quality items for sale by mail
order. All items are white and are imprinted with the Lavender
Visions logo:
Canvas Tote Bag
Souper Mug with lid/coaster
Porcelein Mug

$10.00
8.00
5.00

Please add 5% Indiana sales tax and $2.00 for shipping and
handling. Send order to:
Lavender Visions
P.O. Box 321
Zionsville, IN 46077

August/September 1989

Page 5

LAVENDER VISIONS

THE SUPPORTERS' PAGE
To advertise here, please use the Order Form on the back page or contact us at Lavender Visions, P.O. Box 321, Zionsville IN 46077

317/253-9966

Nancy vanArsdall Jones, M.A.
Individual, Couple, Family and Group Therapy

6360 Guilford Avenue
Indianapolis, Indiana 46220

(317) 253-5160

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Your Hostess
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Page6

LAVENDER VISIONS

August/September 1989

Dorin's Diary
[Editor's Note: Dorin 's Diary is a compilation of short descriptions (provided by our readers) identifying experiences of affirmation, celebration, consciousness-raising, connection with, and
nurturance from other women/Lesbians in the loca]/global community. Please let us hear from you. We grow in collective
strength and peace sharing our lives. Don't be shy. Let us hear
from you. Send to Dorin 's Diary, c/o Lavender Visions, P.O. Box
321, Zionsville, IN 46077.]

• As a Lesbian manager, I sometimes am discouraged in constantly fighting the battles of discrimination and in making certain
that I do my job so well as a representative of Lesbians (and
women) everywhere. During those times, I remind myself that
although I may not be able to change people's attitudes, the
children of those working for me are growing up watching Daddy
work for a woman, and, in particular, a Lesbian. What a co,mforting thought!

• Recently, while on a business trip in Europe, a woman questioned me about the true status of women in corporate America.
She explained that her career options were limited and that she and
others were looking to the U.S. to pave the way for women in her
country. It's something to think about the next time you see or
make a "small" victory for womankind. It's not so small- all
international eyes are focused in our direction.

• With regard to the National Women's Music Festival, a very
close friend told me, "The first time I went to the workshops, I was
intrigued. The second time, I was drawn to the Festival - I felt
a strong urge to go." Now, I understand. As a virgin workshop
participant, I was curious to learn a little about Spirituality.
Instead, I discovered more about myself or at least came away
being able to verbalize my feelings. Next year, I'm going again as
a chance to rejuvenate my energies. Oh, I didn't agree with
everything presented-in fact, I left one seminar because I wasn't
comfortable. But, I understood and accepted why I dido 't want to
attend.

• The Dyketones-what a show and what a gathering! Over 400
Lesbians were in attendance- some seeing friends they hadn't
seen in years. How encouraging it was to be among so many
sisters!

Take the power
continued from page 1
disarmed in our constant battle to assert our love for women and
this planet.
"& this is important
in the loving
in the act of loving
each woman
I have learned a new lesson
I have learned
to love myself'
- Pat Parker, 1978
Those of us who are working now must teach the Lesbians
moving after us that the fight for Lesbian rights is not something
already finished. All was not well in the '80s. "Mainstream
Lesbianism" must not become the catch-phrase for "the closet" of
the '90s. Our Lesbian foremothers are passing the affirmations
onto us: a long proud herstory; a living culture of Lesbian arts,
etiquette, psychology, spirituality, philosophy and environmental
survival; power and vision. Wemustnotgive way to the numerous
devices placed against us by a larger society that wants us
extinguished. Instead, we must envision a future that is NOW as
we want it to be and live it.
[This essay was inspired by the panel discussion presented on June
1, 1989 at the National Women's Music Festival. The panelists

mentioned here have given permission/or distribution ofthe audio
tape with proceeds benefitting WIAINWMF. (For more information on obtaining tapes, see Lavender Pages listing under Book-

stores/Media).]

Valdez Journey
Sea Otter lies now
Outstretched
Immobilized in black tar
Dying
Trying hard to breathe
Do you remember us?
He asks
Do you remember
How, long, long ago
We gave you life?
Do you remember
How we gave you food?
Do you remember
How we clothed you?
Do you remember?
[Reprinted from The Foundation for Shamanic Studies]

August/September 1989

Page 7

LAVENDER VISIONS

THE SUPPORTERS' PAGE
To advertise here, please use the Order Form on the back page or contact us at Lavender Visions, P.O. Box 321, Zionsville IN 46077

WUakt~~

93 south butler ave., suite 3
indianapolis, IN 46219
317/356,4914

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Indianapolis, IN 46220
(317) 255-9907
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Affiliated With:
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1805 E. Washington Blvd.
Fort Wayne, IN 46803
219/424-0248

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Page8

LAVENDER VISIONS

August/Se.ptember 1989

Recognizing internal homophobia helps combat effects
More than half of all Lesbians and Gays think that homophobia is an aggressive and hateful disease afflicting the world's nonhomosexual population.
In truth, however, every person is homophobic. And we don't
stand much of a chance in dealing with other people's homophobia
until we acknowledge and work with our own.
For Lesbians, the single, most prevalent homophobic
thought-consciously and/or unconsciously-is that it is not OK
for women to love women: I am a woman who loves other women;
therefore there is something inherently wrong with me, and I am
a bad person.
This thought is subconsciously manifested when you are out
in public with your lover and find yourself feeling that maybe she
looks a little too "butch," and then you trip into head games that in
no time at all have you thinking that everyone is watching the two
of you, that everyone knows what the two of you were doing to
each other in bed last night, that because you enjoyed what
happened last night, all of your fingers will turn green and fall off
your hands right here in front of all those people who you know are
smirking at you.
Andit'sconsciouslymanifestedformanyofusattheworkplace
(avoiding connecting our lovers' names to any mention of dating
or lovemaking, etc.) and with our families of origin (maintaining
separate bedrooms for appearance's sake, etc.).
Homophobia: I have it; you have it; we all have it. And we
came by it honestly.
There is no way a person can grow up in our culture and avoid
being homophobic. lfLesbians are not treated as if we don't exist,
we are ridiculed, moralized against, looked down upon. Books,
magazines, T.V. shows, movies- the positive Lesbian image is
rare even in 1989.

As children we were taught to be caretakers, so we could find
a man and raise a family. There were subtle or not-so-subtle
disparaging remarks about "poor Aunt Muriel who never did find
a man who would marry her." And we began to feel shame because
we didn't like boys or because we liked girls more than was
acceptable or because we didn't want to take care of a man.
As adults we "de-dyke" our homes when relatives and certain
friends come over. We avoid talking about ou~ Lesbianism and
desperately hope that people won't guess. We limit our joy by
celebrating our love in secret or with carefully selected friends.
And it is this homophobia that places undue stress on longterm relationships. Granted, there are a multitude of reasons why
relationships fall apart, and it is important that we acknowledge
that one of those reasons is homophobia, pure and simple. In her
book, Permanent Partners, Betty Berzon states, "Insofar as you
have problems with feeling good about being gay, no matter how
subtle, they will show up in your same-sex intimate partnerships."
And so we must handle a homophobic onslaught from the
inside as well as from the outside. No wonder we often feel
beseiged. And it is the internalized homophobia that paralyzes us
and prevents effective action to deal with the external homophobia. We must, therefore, deal first with our insides, stopping the
internal onslaught.
But homophobia, like racism, does not go away with the wave
of a magic wand or with the determination to feel good about
ourselves. And after lots of hard work, when we're sure we have
the problem licked, here it is again, rearing its ugly head once more
in yet another subtle form. It is only in recognizing it in all its
deceptive masks that we can begin to banish it from our lives and
be free from its influence, taking strength from each other and all
the strong women who have come before us.

Homophobia : a perspective
continued from page 1
and the various forms of sado-masochism and bondage. I believe
it is important to look at our own psychosexual socialization and
how we continue to perpetuate relationships based in the oppression of power imbalance, sexual performance, and prowess, and
which then negates the inherent mutuality of a relationship based
in loving that flows freely between two persons regardless of their
gender. When we focus on seeking external acceptance for our
private lives, I think we must do so from the perspective of having
first assessed our own self-acceptance and willingness to be
responsible for our personal power issues.
Homophobia is the fear which keeps me from knowing me
and others from knowing me. Let us not look for sanction of what
we do in the expression of our sexuality; rather let us seek sanction
and acceptance for our loving and demand respect because we are
respectful of ourselves, our partners, family and community
members.

August/September 1989

Page9

LAVENDER VISIONS

RESOURCES
continued from page 3
Women's Open Network: 274-5041 or 274-2585 (Sue Moenius).
Womenspired: 274-5041 or 274-2585 (Sue Moenius).

P.O. Box 845, Mishawaka, IN 46544. Yearly subscription:
$10.00; sample copy:$ 1.00. Make check payable to Roberta
Miller.

Bloomington (812)
Bloomington Switchboard: 336-4299.
Gay/Lesbian Alliance: 332-1847.
SPARKS: a social/educational forum for Lesbians. Contact
Marcia, 334-0414, or Carolyn, 339-4283.

Muncie (317)
Ball State Gay/Lesbian Alliance, P.O. Box 354, Pittenger Student Center, 47907; 743-6675.

Columbus (812)
Pitch-In: for information, call 376-0784.
Switchboard Concern: 293-8671 (24 hours).
Evansville (812)
Tri-State Alliance Meeting meets at Unitarian Universalist
Church, 856 So. Kentucky Ave., 4th Sunday of each month.
Fort Wayne (219)
Dignity/Fort Wayne, P.O. Box 12151, 46862.
Drop-In meets at Up the Stairs Community Center, 3426 Broadway, Fridays at 7:30 PM
Fort Wayne Women's Bureau: 303 E. Washington Blvd., 4247977. Peer Counseling: 9 AM - 2 PM, 426-0023. Rape
Awareness Program Hotline: 426-RAPE.
Liberty (812)
The Pearl: Feminist resource/journal. Contact: Natalie Isaac,
editor, 304 South Fairground, Liberty, IN 47353.
Mishawaka (219)
Open Arms: Monthly newsletter for Michiana Lesbians. Contact:

South Bend (219)
Help Line: 232-2522 (9 AM - 5 PM).
Hot Line: 232-3344 (24 Hours).
IUSBU Womyn's Center: 929 Greenlawn, 237-4494.
Monthly Lesbian Potluck and weekly Lesbian support group;
291-3720.

We invite your creativity!
Lavender Visions invites your participation in the form of
letters, articles, poetry, cartoons, or photography. All material
must be signed; names will be withheld upon request.
All material becomes the property ofLavender Visions and
will be returned only if accompanied by a self-addressed,
stamped envelope. Editors reserve the right to edit for
publication.
The October/November issue will focus on ecofeminism
- environmental/spiritual/political concerns locally and
globally, in addition to regular features.
Send submissions to P.O. Box 321, Zionsville, IN 46077;
all material must be received by August 25, 1989.

THE SUPPORTERS' PAGE
serenity
T A N K C E N T E R I N C.
One hour voyages into relaxation and beyond
Floatation sessions at
Serenity Tonk Center
2070 E. 54th St., Ste. #2 _251-9992
Appointments suggested
We specialize ,n Music from the Hearts of Space

$5.00 Discount on Float Session!

custom jewellers
gold-silversmiths and lapidaries

THE

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R.I:N'G

in
antique
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janet cullen and carrie foley 812 -988-2729
p .o . box 234 nashville , indiana 47448
closed wed .

Exp ires 10/ 10/89

Help our community
by supporting our advertisers.

Thanks to our many supporters who have
given gifts of money, time, energy and kind
thoughts as well as the following people who
have contributed their creativity to this issue:

Mention that your saw their ad in

Lavender Visions

Linda, Dorin, Pat, Kathleen and
Carol.

Page 10

LAVENDER VISIONS

August/September 1989

THE LAVENDER PAGE
To be listed here, please use the Order Form on the back page or contact us at: Lavender Visions, P.O. Box 321, Zionsville, IN 46077

ADVERTISING
Accent Advertising Co., Inc., 5420 East St. Clair St.,
Indianapolis, IN 46219 ................................ (317) 357-6530

BED & BREAKFAST-ROOMS FOR RENT
Rooms for rent in homes of Lesbians and Gays in
Indianapolis ............................................... (317) 925-0043

BOOKSTORES/MEDIA
Aquarius Books for a Feminist Future, 116 N. Grant St.,
Bloomington, IN 47402 ............................. (812) 336-0988
Awakening, 6358 N. Guilford Ave., Indianapolis, IN 46220
•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• ..... (317) 255-9907
Dreams and Swords., Inc., 828 E 64th St., Indianapolis,
IN 46220 ................................................. (317) 253-9966
Helaine Victoria Press, 411 E. 4th St., Bloomington, IN
47401 ..................................................... (812) 331-0444
NWMF Panel Discussion Tape: Proceeds to benefit
WIA/NWMF. Send $7.00 to M.A. Bjarkman, 6826 Chrysler
St., Indianapolis, IN 46268. Make checks payable to M.A.
Bjarkman.

CHIROPRACTORS

Micky Craney, 93 S. Butler Ave., Suite 3, Indianapolis, IN
46219 ...................................................... (317) 356-4914
Farrell/Shaw Associates ...................... (317) 283-3623
Mary Gaul, Ed.D., 6360 Guilford, Indianapolis, IN 46220
................................................................ (317) 253-5160
Linda C. Gensheimer, MSW, ACSW, Fort Wayne, IN
............................................... (219) 426-5778 or 424-0248
Nancy VanArsdall Jones, MA, 6360 Guilford Ave.,
Indianapolis, IN ......................................... (317) 253-5160
Pat Jordan, MS ....................................... (317) 257-2350
Margaret Miholick, ACSW . ................... (317) 257-8590
June Thompson, ACSW, CADAC ............ (317) 251-7051

FLORISTS
Flowers Unlimited, 222 E. Market St., Indianapolis, IN
46204 ..................................................... (317) 636-5533

MASSAGE/RELAXATION THERAPY
Massage by Tela, Have table, will travel. For women
only ........................................................ (317) 257-3062

Pyramid Chiropractic, Peg VanDenburgh, DC, 8648
Purdue Rd., Indianapolis, IN 46268 .............. (317) 876-0887

Freda Neal, Alternatives for Health, 1217 Washington St.,
Columbus, IN .......................................... (812) 376-9194

Wellspring Wholistic Health, Evelyn A. Dysarz, DC,
7117 N Olney, Indianapolis, IN 46240 .......... (317) 841-8664

Serenity Tank Center, 2070 E. 54th St., Ste. #2,
Indianapolis, IN ........................................ (317) 251-9992

CONSTRUCTION/HOME IMPROVEMENT

Maryann Steinhart, 6407 N. Michigan Road, Indianapolis,
IN 46268 ................................................. (317) 257-2350

Vickie Harris, Furniture finishing, painting, stripping,
staining, varnish, etc ................................... (317) 353-6636
Janco Lock Service, Certified, bonded, insured ....... .
............................................................... (317) 291-1818
Jennifer Norrington, Specializing in kitchen and bath
design for home remodeling and construction ............. .
.................................. (317) 253-1460 (H) or 635-6123 (W)
Anne Shellabarger, Mooresville, IN ......... (317) 996-2115
Shipp Construction Co .. ..... (317) 254-9126 or 252-2404
Solar Accents, Window Tinting, 1511 N. Emerson Ave.
Rear, Indianapolis, IN 46219 ....... (317) 356-8722 or 632-5854
Sunshine Services .................................. (317) 353-6636

COUNSELING/PERSONAL GROWTH
Cooperative Martial Arts: Aikido & T'ai Chi, T'ai Chi
Ch'uan Academy, 2070 E. 54th, Suite 3, Indianapolis, IN
............................................................... (317) 251-2070
Courageous Living, Tim Davis, MS, Nancy O'Hara, MS,
CADAC ................................................... (317) 925-0043

Kay Whitehead, BA, MsT ....................... (317) 241-8905

PROFESSIONAL SERVICES
Mary A. Byrne, Realtor, 1202 N. Pennsylvania,
Indianapolis, IN 46202 .............. (317) 638-1020 or 923-5574
Haynes Bookkeeping, Tax service specializing in small
business and S-corporations ......................... (317) 293-3190
Clara Ann Merkel, French lace making .... (317) 241-8905
Olan Mills Not Ready For You? Gay/Lesbian couple
portraits .................................................... (317) 924-2028
Candace L. Shearls, Computer Consultant.. ........... .
............................................................... (317) 255-8328
Union Ceremonies and relationship celebrations for Gay
and Lesbian couples. Debra Harless, MDiv .... (317) 924-2028

RESTAURANTS
Westerfields Steakhouse, Lunch, Dinner and Catering,
6158 N. Hillside, Indianapolis, IN 46220 ........ (317) 251-2765

1

Univ1)ilff11ri11J1111/iiji1!~~
llll~lil li1i~l~liil~[lfld,OK
M 001 111 582

August/September 1989

Page 11

In Tribute to Angry Women
A prose poem by Julia Trahan
I am an angry dyke;
my temper as black as my brow
as sharp as my nails
as impartial as a flood
that is seeking, always,
somewhere to stop.
I say these words because I want women to become who they
want to be. I am not talking about myself. I am talking about
women.
My body is held together by metal pins; each time I stand
chronic pain fills my legs and torso. This in itself makes me angry.
Angry that I have a broken body at the age of 23. People are stupid
about people with broken bodies. This is the source of my anger.
I am not saying these things to hear myself talk or to complain
about how oppressed I am. If anyone comes to me and asks me
about my handicap, I shall be quite disappointed, knowing that I
did not get my point across.
I could just as easily talk about one of the millions of women
who come to this country expecting fulfillment of their dreams;
instead of finding wealth, happiness and open arms, they find
systematic destruction and lies. I could talk about a woman
hunched upon her knees, the red blood puddles around her ankles.
She is naked. She is also dead. The victim of an abortionist who
already has all the money she could borrow tucked inside his
pocket. I could talk about the housewife married 25 years to a man
who calls her Lard Butt because she eats a lot, remembering the
times her alcoholic father drank it up. Married to a man who
punches her because she is "stupid." I could tell many stories, but
I'll refrain. Most of us in this room have been raped; we know the
stories too well.
Last night I dreamt of volcanoes. A volcanic eruption, like a
woman's anger, is a natural force that cannot be predicted or
controlled.

A volcano erupting with pure, raw energy, releasing built up
pressures. In my dream, this is what I saw.
Can you imagine what would happen if all women who have
fires waiting to explode removed the skins of respectability,
removed the layers of history? If their fury were expressed, a
volcanic explosion would look small. The Earth would be covered
with fire.
I want to explode as a volcano does, molten lava flowing over
lies and liars.
I do not want to be destroyed by my own anger. In order to
survive I have to express it.
It is for these reasons I accept with pride being called a bitch
or aggressively lesbian or evil woman. I simply, but not easily,
understand if called overbearing when I am being assertive or
trying to express a point or refusing to be destroyed by my own
anger.
I say to all women, whether your pain, your anger is private,
or openly expressed or unknown even to you
I am an angry woman,
an unreasonable woman.
If you are not, I question, why not? If you do not want to be
labeled as such, I ask you not to negate us so-called unreasonable,
angry, moody women. We are not bitches, or cunts, or evil. We
do not appreciate being told to be a little nicer, a little quieter, or
to change in some way that will make us more feminine.
And yes, I am unreasonable.
We are so unreasonable,
so perfectly reasonably, unreasonable.
It's a damn good way to be.

INFORMATION FORM

AUG/SEPT 1989

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Send to: Lavender Visions, P.O. Box 321, Zionsville, IN 46077.

Page 12

August/September 1989

LAVENDER VISIONS

Prejudice, acceptance, love -- themes in Fried Green Tomatoes
"FRIED GREEN TOMATOES AT THE WHISTLE STOP
CAFE." By Fannie Flagg.
Yes, this is the same Fannie Flagg from Broadway, T.V. and
all those game shows. This red-headed comedienne from Alabama is a born storyteller who has created a delightful small town
full of believable and endearing characters.
ReminiscentofRitaMaeBrown'sSixofOne,Flagg'sWhistle
Stop, Alabama, surpasses Runnymede, Maryland.
The style of the novel is both unique and effective. The
chapters are 2- or 3- page gems that have the cumulative effect of
weekly cliffhangers. The dialogue is real and funny and reflects
the author's years of skit writing. We even get to sample recipes
of favorites from the cafe.
By moving between the present and the Depression South,
and by giving us multiple perspectives, we learn about the lives of
the people of Whistle Stop. We eavesdrop on the stories of Ninny
Threadgoode at the Rose Terrace Nursing Home. We read the
Weems Weekly (written by Dot Weems) and learn of fallen
meteorites and of the new Philco radio at the cafe ("stop by to hear
Amos and Andy.') We also read articles in the big city newspapers
and follow the fortunes of Whistle Stop inhabitants who venture
there.
The themes explored include prejudice, acceptance, belonging, the importance of humor, what's important and what isn't,
fears about aging, and the effects oflove on the human experience.
When Idgie (age 15 or 16) is smitten with Ruth (age 21 or 22),
Momma Threadgoode warns the siblings, "Now, children, your
sister has a crush, and I don't want one person to laugh at her. Is
that understood?" But faced with an uncustomarily scrubbed and
hair-greased Idgie, they cannot control themselves and are dismissed from the table to roll on the parlor floor with laughter.
This is the story of Ruth and Idgie, who run the cafe and raise
a son together. It'salsothestoryofEvelynCouch who,atmid-life,
longs to find herself and a place to belong. And it's the story of

Sipsey, Onzell and Big George, the black folks who cook at the
cafe and of dozens of others who come to life in these pages.
The folk of Whistle Stop will bring tears and laughter into
your life and will live in your heart and mind long after you've read
about them.
(Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistle Stop Cafe is available
at Dreams and Swords.)

FANNIE FLAGG
~

F

A

vvt-HSTLE

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AUG/SEPT 1989

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VISIONS
August/September 1989

Lesbians must take the power within and manifest it without
by Terri Jewell
once upon a time, there was a dream
a dream of women, a dream of women
coming together and turning the world
around. turning the world around and making it over
a dream of women, all women being sisters.
a dream of caring; a dream of protection, a dream
ofpeace.
-PatParker, 1978
Black Lesbian Feminist poet Pat Parker is dead of breast
canceratage45. Wheniarrivedatthe15thNWMFinBloomington
this year, I hoped to hear her read, hoped to attend her workshop.
I wanted to see her sit on a panel of other Lesbian foremothersZBudapest, Del Martin,PhyllisLyon, Kay Gardner, Sonia Johnson
and Merlin Stone. This astounding group of women represent
many decades of Lesbian struggle, 'thought and culture.
ButPatParkercouldnotbe there. She wasdead2 weeks later.
I remember my own rearing as a dyke from the time I came out
in 1976. I was in college in New Jersey during a period when
Lesbian visibility and "coming out" were the biggest issues.
Lesbians consistently led the way in all concerns of the Women's

Movement, including children's
rights, the implications of
pornography, poor women's health,
domestic violence, abortion, and equal
pay. Lesbians were also constructing
the foundations of our own culture
while discovering and preserving our
herstories. I rapidly grew strong
within myself as a Lesbian then and
have carried the seeds of what I
learned. These seeds of commitment
and perseverance multiply despite the
Pat Parker
post-Reagan conservatism that is fed
by such catchwords as "family," (Photo by Martha Dunham)
"church," "flag," "morality,"
"stability," "patriotism," and "traditional values." There is an
effort now to suppress societal change that brings about increased
human rights and participation in a society maintained for the
benefit of white male privilege. It is within such an environment
that Lesbians must continue to work for survival today and the
future. We cannot afford to become lax in our vigilance or
continued on page 6

Homophobia: a personal and political perspective
by Rosemary Rocco
Homophobia is defined in many ways by many people and
often it seems we are speaking about the behaviors that occur, or
the stereotyping and bigotry that feed homophobia, rather than the
examining the basic concept of the phobia. Quite simply, homophobia is the fear of loving someone of the same gender. It is not
a fear of a certain sexuality nor a fear of specific sex acts.
This distinction is rather important, not only in addressing
external homophobia, but also in addressing internal homophobia,
if we are really interested in affecting fear. The fear of loving
someone of the same gender or of those who love someone of the
same gender is supported by stereotypes and bigoted belief systems. The stereotype is carried out by assuming that Lesbians and
Gays are always looking for "a lay" and is sustained with thought
patterns that focus on what Gays and Lesbians do in bed and only
on what they do in bed. Ifwe can begin to talk about stereotyping
and bigotry as the ways that homophobia is carried out and

sustained, rather than bringing our private sexual lives into public,
we can then effectively talk about the phobia for what it is irrational fear.
In responding to internal homophobia, I believe that we must
also look at our own internal focus on defining our relationships
by the amount, quality and kind of sexual expression. In the
history of addressing Lesbian oppression, we talk as a movement
about wanting our privacy respected and our right to carry out
freedoms guaranteed to us as citizens, and yet it seems that we
often go about this by making our private lives public and by
demanding public sanction for a private act. In this we include a
range of sexual expression that is not necessarily accepted within
a heterosexual context and which represents small slices of a small
slice of the whole range of human expression. In this I include
sexual relationships with people under eighteen, non-monogamy,
continued on page 8

Page2

LAVENDER VISIONS

August/September 1989

Escorts endure threats to protect women's right to choose
[The Supreme Court decision threatening to limit a woman's right
to choose how she controls her own body has engendered increased violence from the anti-choice forces. We wish to thank
and affirm our sisters in the trenches, many ofwhom are suffering
from combat fatigue. -LV Staff]

Some describe what has been happening in Ft. Wayne,
Indiana, in front of the Women's Health Organization as a "war."
It is there that the battle lines have been drawn between the prochoice and anti-choice sides of the abortion issue. For many,
however, the issue is not just about abortion, but about reproductive rights and the rights of women to have control over their own
lives.
The Women's Health Organization has been providing health
care services, including abortions, to women since the 1970s. For
almost as long, anti-choice groups have picketed the clinic and
have harassed and attempted to prevent patients from entering the
clinic. "Street counselors," a self-designated term of the antichoice group, confront patients and their family and friends when
entering the clinic, shouting such things as "It's not too late" or
"Don't kill your baby." They also try to force literature, including
pictures of dead fetuses, upon these patients. While one or more
"street counselors" engage in this harassment, other anti-choice
individuals march on the sidewalk in front of the clinic singing
hymns and quoting scripture.
What comes between the anti-choice picketers and "street
counselors" and the women attempting to enter the clinic is a group
which has come to be known as the pro-choice escorts. The escorts
meet women as they arrive, surround them and escort them to the
door of the clinic. They attempt to drown out the verbal harassment from the "street counselors" and to prevent plastic fetuses
and bloody pictures of aborted fetuses from being shoved into the
faces of women entering the clinic. Often, it is the escorts
themselves who are shoved and also verbally harassed.
The Women's Health Organization was one of the first clinics
in the country to be picketed and it is also one of the very few
clinics which has not been shut down by a "rescue." Operation
Rescue of Northeastern Indiana has hit the Women's Health
Organization twice within recent months. Both times hundreds of
anti-choice demonstrators sat on the sidewalk in front of the clinic
and attempted to block the entranceway to prevent patients from
entering the clinic.
During the first "rescue" on April 21, approximately 300 "rescuers" arrived at the clinic at 6:30 AM and attempted to "take" the
building. Escorts had received word of a possible "rescue" and
had arrived at 5 AM to erect a temporary plywood barricade.
Patients were kept in vans in a church parking lot across the street
while the police took nearly three hours to arrest approximately
100 anti-choice demonstrators. "Street counselors" circled the
vans holding plastic fetuses and bloody pictures up to the windows
and had to be stopped by police.
Police intervention is minimal - the job of securing the clinic
building and assuring that patients are able to enter the clinic is
done by the escorts. Often it is necessary for escorts to surround

a patient, who may choose to have a blanket thrown over her head
to avoid being photographed by anti-choice picketers. Escorts
walk the patient several hundred feet past shouting picketers and
between two mounted police stationed at the entranceway to the
clinic.
The pro-choice escorts are a diverse group of women and
men, the majority being women, and a significant number of these
are from the Ft. Wayne Lesbian community. The escorts have
been doing the work of the police, and many are struggling with
the feeling of being burned out. It is very difficult in this brief
article to convey the feelings experienced by an escort. Carolyn
Clark, volunteer coordinator for the escorts, sums up her feelings
in this way: "When I first said I would go to the clinic and help,
I didn 'tthink I would get involved to this extent. It is unbelievable
to me that people can treat patients the way they do and get away
with it. No one can really grasp what happens until you 're there."
Individuals are strongly encouraged to come to the clinic on
procedure days and observe just what does happen. Additional
information, including videotapes from past procedure days are
available through Ft. Wayne Feminists, P.O. Box 10267, Ft.
Wayne, IN 46851, or call (219) 456-5244 or (219) 432-4523. In
Indianapolis, the Indiana Pro-Choice Action League {IPCAL) will
be holding training classes for new escorts in the early fall; contact
Beth Lowery at (317) 283-6033 for more information. Merrillville
Planned Parenthood (219-769-3500) is the contact for information
on clinic escorts in northwest Indiana.

VISIONS

Statement of Purpose
Lavender Visions is
for me and for you,
for all Lesbians,
for us to connect within
our larger community
so that together we may increase
our respect and support
for each other and ourselves,
affirming, celebrating and
honoring the women we are.

Published bi-monthly by Solstice Seed. Mailing address: Lavender
Visions, P.O. Box 321, Zionsville, IN 46077. The opinions
expressed in Lavender Visions do not necessarily reflect the views
of the publishers and editors.
Publishers ............ Mary Gaul (M.G.), Nancy VanArsdall Jones
Managing Editor .............................................. Candace Shearls
Editors ................. D.J. Gridley, Pat Jordan, Mary Ann Steinhart
Advertising Coordinator .......................................... Ruth Peters
Mail Subscriptions
Subscriptions are available at $8-12 a year. Advertising rates
available on request. Send address corrections to address above.

August/September 1989

Page3

LAVENDER VISIONS

Bulletin Board
MichiganWomyn'sFestival: August9-13;contactW.W.T.M.C.,
Box 22, Walhalla, MI 49458, or call (616) 757-4766.
Older Women's Network (O.W.N.): Tuesday, August 15, 7:30
PM. Maryann Steinhart will teach and demonstrate message
therapy. Sue and Sherry are hosts. For more information, call
(317) 786-5845 or write O.W.N., P.O. Box 2528, Indianapolis, IN 46206.
Lesbian Discussion Group: Donna from P-FLAG will lead a
discussion on mother-daughter relationships at the group's
regular meeting, August 31, 7-8:30 PM. Call (317) 577-2245.
Labor Day Picnic: September 3, noon-6 PM, Westlake Park,
Indianapolis, IN. Sponsored by Unicom Club.
ICLU Annual Conference and Dinner: September 23. Conference 9: 30 AM - 5: 30 PM, Indiana University School of Law,
Indianapolis. Workshop topics include: "The War on Drugs:
An Assault on Civil Rights?", "After Webster: The Current
State ofReproductiveRights,""Access to the Courts," "Civil
Rights of the Mentally Ill," "Is There Justice for Juveniles?",
and "Censorship and the First Amendment." For more
information, call the ICLU office (317) 635-4059.

Branching Out Productions Presents:
The Old Holly is Back: Holly Near in concert Sunday afternoon,
October 8, Shortridge Jr. High Performing Arts Center.
Tickets will be available at Dreams & Swords.
Breaking Free from Overeating & Compulsive Eating, an intensive one-day workshop, October 28.
Claudia Black, Adult Children of Alcoholics, a day-long
'seminar for children of alcoholics and/or other drug
dependencies, November 3, 9 AM - 4 PM.
[For more information about any Branching Out Production,
call (317) 637-2906.]
Nancy Brooks and Jane Winslow in Performance: Tentatively
scheduled for October 21. See the October/November 1989
issue of Lavender Visions for more details.
"Something's Brewing": "Something's Brewing" Women's
Coffeehouse meets the first Saturday of each month at 7:30
PM at 615 West43rd Street (Unitarian UniversalistChurch).
For information about programs, cost and schedule changes,
call (317) 274-2585.

RESOURCES
Indianavolis (317)
AIDS Hotline: 257-HOPE, answered 7-11 PM, every evening.
AIDS: Living the Journey Together: a family therapy group for
persons with AIDS and a care partner, parent, sibling, lover,
friend. Sponsored by Courageous Living Counseling Ser.vices, located in Westview Hospital Professional Bldg., 9250043.
Dignity meets at St. Thomas Aquinas Church, 46th & Illinois,
Sundaysat6PM; P.O. Box 431, Indianapolis, IN 46202; 9246578 (Drew).
Friends for Lesbian and Gay Concerns (Quaker); 635-8646
(Diane or Perri).
Gay AA meets at Bethlehem Lutheran, Sundays at 7 PM; 6327864.
Gay/Lesbian Switchboard: 253-GA YS (7 - 11 PM).
Gay and Lesbian Codependents Anonymous meets at Winona
Hospital, 3232 N. Meridian St.; 925-1135 (Don), 636-4986
(Joe), 297-0386 (Pam).
Gay Parents Coalition oflndianapolis meets at Holy Eucharist
Church, 38th & Illinois, 2nd Sunday of each month at 7:30
PM; 253-2280 (John)
Indianapolis Youth Group for Lesbian and gay youth ages 23
and under meets bi-weekly. For more information call
Lesbian/Gay Switchboard at 253-GA YS and ask for the
organization's contact person.
Indianapolis NOW meets at Planned Parenthood, 3219 N. Meridian, 2nd Wednesday of each month at 6:30 PM; 925-4641.
Indianapolis Pitch-In: Our monthly pitch-in dinners provide

social and networking opportunities for all Lesbians. Generally, the pitch-in is scheduled for the second Friday of each
month, beginning at 7 PM. The location (and directions, if
necessary) usually is available at Dreams and Swords at least
a week before each pitch-in.
Integrity meets at All Saints Church, 16th and Central, Mondays
at 6:30 PM; 635-3744.
Justice, Inc.: Lesbian resource for issues regarding state laws,
community/police relations, civil rights, Lesbian/Gay conferences, other special events. 1534 E. 10th St., Indianapolis,
IN 46201, 634-9212.
Lesbian Discussion Group: Next meeting August 31. Beginning
in September, will meet 2nd and 4th Thursday of each month,
7- 8:30PM, at6360 N. Guilford; 253-5160 (NancyVanArsdall Jones).
Lesbian Incest Survivors Therapy Group. Contact Linda
Gensheimer, (219) 426-5778 (Fort Wayne).
Older Women's Network for Women Over 40 meets at 5602
Wagon Wheel Trail, 3rd Tuesday of each month; 786-5845.
Overeaters Anonymous (for men and women) meets at Dreams
and Swords, 828 E. 64th Street, Fridays at 6:30 PM, 2539966.
P-FLAG (Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays) meets at
Butler University in Atherton Center,Room 312, 2nd Sunday
of each month at 2:00 PM; 251-9307 (Donna).
University Gay/Lesbian Alliance meets at 3754 N. Illinois St.
(Lambda Center). Call 274-2585.
continued on page 9

Page4

LAVENDER VISIONS

August/September 1989

Attorney relies on self-acceptance, self-confidence in life
Marie knew as a child that she wanted to be a trial lawyer. She
also knew she was a Lesbian.
At 30, several years into her law career, she is a successful
attorney working on social justice issues and is a woman who
accepts her Lesbianism as a natural part of herself. Both accomplishments are the direct result of a great deal of self- confidence
and the ability to focus on a goal, heading almost single-mindedly
toward it.
Marie grew up in Indianapolis, the oldest of four children in
a middle-class Catholic family. She describes her parents as
supportive of her goals and the source of a major portion of her
self-confidence. Thanks to them and a progressive school environment, she never went through the believing-she-couldn't-dosomething-stage. Good grades, athletic honors, involvement in
school activities and politics - anything Marie set her mind to,
she achieved. Boys? Dating? Marie had neither time nor interest
in them. "I remember boys were brats," she says. She hung out
with the boys on her AAU swim team and went to dances with
them because she liked to dance. But date? Go steady? No
interest. Her relationships with girls, however, were somewhat
different. There were intense emotional relationships that Marie
now recognizes as "falling in love." And at the all-women schools
she attended right through college, intense female friendships
were the norm. No one questioned or expected that the friendship
went further, so Marie
never faced isolation or
ridicule because of her
*WEARE*
sexual affectional preferEVERYWHERE
ence.
Herexperienceinthe
professional world is similar, where she's risen quickly to the supervisory and managerial
position she holds today. She does not openly talk about her sexual
affectional preference at work; neither does she hide it. Marie
believes that her Lesbianism has helped her in the work world.
While heterosexual women often flounder in confusion over their
relationship to their male bosses and colleagues, she has used her
self-confidence and sense of focus to produce results. She is proud
of the fact that at 30 she has been instrumental in making new law
and setting precedents.
"Power is a perception," says Marie. "In order for people to
have power over you, you have to be afraid of the consequences."
Marie clearly is not, and yet she recognizes that some people have
greater fear oflosing their jobs and therefore must acquiesce to the
"system" more than she does. "We are a minority who has to make
a decision about identifying ourselves," she says. And she
believes there is room for working within the system. Both
radicals and moderates need one another, she believes, and at this
time she has chosen to be a moderate working within, affecting
needed changes.
Yet she recognizes the changes in herself. Just a month before
this interview, she "came out" to her parents: shock and a promise
to deal with it from one, less positive response from the other.

Marie is still waiting to see
where the chips will fall as
time goes by.
Why did she choose
this time to tell them? She
says it became too easy to
go on believing that the
perfect time would come.
She has been working on
family issues, and continuing to keep that secret
touched the core of her
integrity.
"I am working on living as honestly as possible,
and accepting the consequences of this commitment. This commitment is an ongoing
struggle between my own fears and my own abilities to act," she
says.
And as she becomes more honest with her family about her
life-style, she feels herself moving toward doing more work in the
Lesbian community and becoming more political.
Marie is a person who has always figured out what she's
wanted, gone after it and gotten it. Now she is learning to accept
that she doesn't always know what she wants, that she doesn't
have to know, and that what she wants is constantly changing.
"I'm learning to be comfortable and secure with ambiguities," she
says.
Marie acknowledges what to her feels like a huge dent in her
self-confidence, an internal fear that she could, indeed, lose
everything. And her insurance policy against that is a to-death pact
with a friend: neither will allow the other to end up a bag-lady,
dependent on garbage scraps. Somehow this writer doubts that
pact will ever be called upon.

Order some good stuff ...
We have the following high-quality items for sale by mail
order. All items are white and are imprinted with the Lavender
Visions logo:
Canvas Tote Bag
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$10.00
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Please add 5% Indiana sales tax and $2.00 for shipping and
handling. Send order to:
Lavender Visions
P.O. Box 321
Zionsville, IN 46077

August/September 1989

Page 5

LAVENDER VISIONS

THE SUPPORTERS' PAGE
To advertise here, please use the Order Form on the back page or contact us at Lavender Visions, P.O. Box 321, Zionsville IN 46077

317/253-9966

Nancy vanArsdall Jones, M.A.
Individual, Couple, Family and Group Therapy

6360 Guilford Avenue
Indianapolis, Indiana 46220

(317) 253-5160

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Painting, Lawn Care, Gutter Cleaning
Light Hauling
Business/Residential
Senior Citizen Discount

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Counseling and
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7117 N . Olney
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MARY A. BYRNE
Residential Specialist
Member Million Dollar Club

Each O11,ce Is Independently Owned And Operated

Your Hostess
Susan Colgrove

Page6

LAVENDER VISIONS

August/September 1989

Dorin's Diary
[Editor's Note: Dorin 's Diary is a compilation of short descriptions (provided by our readers) identifying experiences of affirmation, celebration, consciousness-raising, connection with, and
nurturance from other women/Lesbians in the loca]/global community. Please let us hear from you. We grow in collective
strength and peace sharing our lives. Don't be shy. Let us hear
from you. Send to Dorin 's Diary, c/o Lavender Visions, P.O. Box
321, Zionsville, IN 46077.]

• As a Lesbian manager, I sometimes am discouraged in constantly fighting the battles of discrimination and in making certain
that I do my job so well as a representative of Lesbians (and
women) everywhere. During those times, I remind myself that
although I may not be able to change people's attitudes, the
children of those working for me are growing up watching Daddy
work for a woman, and, in particular, a Lesbian. What a co,mforting thought!

• Recently, while on a business trip in Europe, a woman questioned me about the true status of women in corporate America.
She explained that her career options were limited and that she and
others were looking to the U.S. to pave the way for women in her
country. It's something to think about the next time you see or
make a "small" victory for womankind. It's not so small- all
international eyes are focused in our direction.

• With regard to the National Women's Music Festival, a very
close friend told me, "The first time I went to the workshops, I was
intrigued. The second time, I was drawn to the Festival - I felt
a strong urge to go." Now, I understand. As a virgin workshop
participant, I was curious to learn a little about Spirituality.
Instead, I discovered more about myself or at least came away
being able to verbalize my feelings. Next year, I'm going again as
a chance to rejuvenate my energies. Oh, I didn't agree with
everything presented-in fact, I left one seminar because I wasn't
comfortable. But, I understood and accepted why I dido 't want to
attend.

• The Dyketones-what a show and what a gathering! Over 400
Lesbians were in attendance- some seeing friends they hadn't
seen in years. How encouraging it was to be among so many
sisters!

Take the power
continued from page 1
disarmed in our constant battle to assert our love for women and
this planet.
"& this is important
in the loving
in the act of loving
each woman
I have learned a new lesson
I have learned
to love myself'
- Pat Parker, 1978
Those of us who are working now must teach the Lesbians
moving after us that the fight for Lesbian rights is not something
already finished. All was not well in the '80s. "Mainstream
Lesbianism" must not become the catch-phrase for "the closet" of
the '90s. Our Lesbian foremothers are passing the affirmations
onto us: a long proud herstory; a living culture of Lesbian arts,
etiquette, psychology, spirituality, philosophy and environmental
survival; power and vision. Wemustnotgive way to the numerous
devices placed against us by a larger society that wants us
extinguished. Instead, we must envision a future that is NOW as
we want it to be and live it.
[This essay was inspired by the panel discussion presented on June
1, 1989 at the National Women's Music Festival. The panelists

mentioned here have given permission/or distribution ofthe audio
tape with proceeds benefitting WIAINWMF. (For more information on obtaining tapes, see Lavender Pages listing under Book-

stores/Media).]

Valdez Journey
Sea Otter lies now
Outstretched
Immobilized in black tar
Dying
Trying hard to breathe
Do you remember us?
He asks
Do you remember
How, long, long ago
We gave you life?
Do you remember
How we gave you food?
Do you remember
How we clothed you?
Do you remember?
[Reprinted from The Foundation for Shamanic Studies]

August/September 1989

Page 7

LAVENDER VISIONS

THE SUPPORTERS' PAGE
To advertise here, please use the Order Form on the back page or contact us at Lavender Visions, P.O. Box 321, Zionsville IN 46077

WUakt~~

93 south butler ave., suite 3
indianapolis, IN 46219
317/356,4914

Books • Cassettes • Videos • Cards • Classes
Hours: 11 a.m. - 7 p.m. Monday- Friday
11 a.m. - 5 p.m. Saturday

codependency and ACOA
counseling

6358 North Guilford Avenue
Indianapolis, IN 46220
(317) 255-9907
,r

LINDA C. GENSHEIMER, MSW, ACSW

Affiliated With:
Dr. David Porter, M.D.
1805 E. Washington Blvd.
Fort Wayne, IN 46803
219/424-0248

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219/426-5778

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lndlanapolls, IN 46219

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Page8

LAVENDER VISIONS

August/Se.ptember 1989

Recognizing internal homophobia helps combat effects
More than half of all Lesbians and Gays think that homophobia is an aggressive and hateful disease afflicting the world's nonhomosexual population.
In truth, however, every person is homophobic. And we don't
stand much of a chance in dealing with other people's homophobia
until we acknowledge and work with our own.
For Lesbians, the single, most prevalent homophobic
thought-consciously and/or unconsciously-is that it is not OK
for women to love women: I am a woman who loves other women;
therefore there is something inherently wrong with me, and I am
a bad person.
This thought is subconsciously manifested when you are out
in public with your lover and find yourself feeling that maybe she
looks a little too "butch," and then you trip into head games that in
no time at all have you thinking that everyone is watching the two
of you, that everyone knows what the two of you were doing to
each other in bed last night, that because you enjoyed what
happened last night, all of your fingers will turn green and fall off
your hands right here in front of all those people who you know are
smirking at you.
Andit'sconsciouslymanifestedformanyofusattheworkplace
(avoiding connecting our lovers' names to any mention of dating
or lovemaking, etc.) and with our families of origin (maintaining
separate bedrooms for appearance's sake, etc.).
Homophobia: I have it; you have it; we all have it. And we
came by it honestly.
There is no way a person can grow up in our culture and avoid
being homophobic. lfLesbians are not treated as if we don't exist,
we are ridiculed, moralized against, looked down upon. Books,
magazines, T.V. shows, movies- the positive Lesbian image is
rare even in 1989.

As children we were taught to be caretakers, so we could find
a man and raise a family. There were subtle or not-so-subtle
disparaging remarks about "poor Aunt Muriel who never did find
a man who would marry her." And we began to feel shame because
we didn't like boys or because we liked girls more than was
acceptable or because we didn't want to take care of a man.
As adults we "de-dyke" our homes when relatives and certain
friends come over. We avoid talking about ou~ Lesbianism and
desperately hope that people won't guess. We limit our joy by
celebrating our love in secret or with carefully selected friends.
And it is this homophobia that places undue stress on longterm relationships. Granted, there are a multitude of reasons why
relationships fall apart, and it is important that we acknowledge
that one of those reasons is homophobia, pure and simple. In her
book, Permanent Partners, Betty Berzon states, "Insofar as you
have problems with feeling good about being gay, no matter how
subtle, they will show up in your same-sex intimate partnerships."
And so we must handle a homophobic onslaught from the
inside as well as from the outside. No wonder we often feel
beseiged. And it is the internalized homophobia that paralyzes us
and prevents effective action to deal with the external homophobia. We must, therefore, deal first with our insides, stopping the
internal onslaught.
But homophobia, like racism, does not go away with the wave
of a magic wand or with the determination to feel good about
ourselves. And after lots of hard work, when we're sure we have
the problem licked, here it is again, rearing its ugly head once more
in yet another subtle form. It is only in recognizing it in all its
deceptive masks that we can begin to banish it from our lives and
be free from its influence, taking strength from each other and all
the strong women who have come before us.

Homophobia : a perspective
continued from page 1
and the various forms of sado-masochism and bondage. I believe
it is important to look at our own psychosexual socialization and
how we continue to perpetuate relationships based in the oppression of power imbalance, sexual performance, and prowess, and
which then negates the inherent mutuality of a relationship based
in loving that flows freely between two persons regardless of their
gender. When we focus on seeking external acceptance for our
private lives, I think we must do so from the perspective of having
first assessed our own self-acceptance and willingness to be
responsible for our personal power issues.
Homophobia is the fear which keeps me from knowing me
and others from knowing me. Let us not look for sanction of what
we do in the expression of our sexuality; rather let us seek sanction
and acceptance for our loving and demand respect because we are
respectful of ourselves, our partners, family and community
members.

August/September 1989

Page9

LAVENDER VISIONS

RESOURCES
continued from page 3
Women's Open Network: 274-5041 or 274-2585 (Sue Moenius).
Womenspired: 274-5041 or 274-2585 (Sue Moenius).

P.O. Box 845, Mishawaka, IN 46544. Yearly subscription:
$10.00; sample copy:$ 1.00. Make check payable to Roberta
Miller.

Bloomington (812)
Bloomington Switchboard: 336-4299.
Gay/Lesbian Alliance: 332-1847.
SPARKS: a social/educational forum for Lesbians. Contact
Marcia, 334-0414, or Carolyn, 339-4283.

Muncie (317)
Ball State Gay/Lesbian Alliance, P.O. Box 354, Pittenger Student Center, 47907; 743-6675.

Columbus (812)
Pitch-In: for information, call 376-0784.
Switchboard Concern: 293-8671 (24 hours).
Evansville (812)
Tri-State Alliance Meeting meets at Unitarian Universalist
Church, 856 So. Kentucky Ave., 4th Sunday of each month.
Fort Wayne (219)
Dignity/Fort Wayne, P.O. Box 12151, 46862.
Drop-In meets at Up the Stairs Community Center, 3426 Broadway, Fridays at 7:30 PM
Fort Wayne Women's Bureau: 303 E. Washington Blvd., 4247977. Peer Counseling: 9 AM - 2 PM, 426-0023. Rape
Awareness Program Hotline: 426-RAPE.
Liberty (812)
The Pearl: Feminist resource/journal. Contact: Natalie Isaac,
editor, 304 South Fairground, Liberty, IN 47353.
Mishawaka (219)
Open Arms: Monthly newsletter for Michiana Lesbians. Contact:

South Bend (219)
Help Line: 232-2522 (9 AM - 5 PM).
Hot Line: 232-3344 (24 Hours).
IUSBU Womyn's Center: 929 Greenlawn, 237-4494.
Monthly Lesbian Potluck and weekly Lesbian support group;
291-3720.

We invite your creativity!
Lavender Visions invites your participation in the form of
letters, articles, poetry, cartoons, or photography. All material
must be signed; names will be withheld upon request.
All material becomes the property ofLavender Visions and
will be returned only if accompanied by a self-addressed,
stamped envelope. Editors reserve the right to edit for
publication.
The October/November issue will focus on ecofeminism
- environmental/spiritual/political concerns locally and
globally, in addition to regular features.
Send submissions to P.O. Box 321, Zionsville, IN 46077;
all material must be received by August 25, 1989.

THE SUPPORTERS' PAGE
serenity
T A N K C E N T E R I N C.
One hour voyages into relaxation and beyond
Floatation sessions at
Serenity Tonk Center
2070 E. 54th St., Ste. #2 _251-9992
Appointments suggested
We specialize ,n Music from the Hearts of Space

$5.00 Discount on Float Session!

custom jewellers
gold-silversmiths and lapidaries

THE

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janet cullen and carrie foley 812 -988-2729
p .o . box 234 nashville , indiana 47448
closed wed .

Exp ires 10/ 10/89

Help our community
by supporting our advertisers.

Thanks to our many supporters who have
given gifts of money, time, energy and kind
thoughts as well as the following people who
have contributed their creativity to this issue:

Mention that your saw their ad in

Lavender Visions

Linda, Dorin, Pat, Kathleen and
Carol.

Page 10

LAVENDER VISIONS

August/September 1989

THE LAVENDER PAGE
To be listed here, please use the Order Form on the back page or contact us at: Lavender Visions, P.O. Box 321, Zionsville, IN 46077

ADVERTISING
Accent Advertising Co., Inc., 5420 East St. Clair St.,
Indianapolis, IN 46219 ................................ (317) 357-6530

BED & BREAKFAST-ROOMS FOR RENT
Rooms for rent in homes of Lesbians and Gays in
Indianapolis ............................................... (317) 925-0043

BOOKSTORES/MEDIA
Aquarius Books for a Feminist Future, 116 N. Grant St.,
Bloomington, IN 47402 ............................. (812) 336-0988
Awakening, 6358 N. Guilford Ave., Indianapolis, IN 46220
•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• ..... (317) 255-9907
Dreams and Swords., Inc., 828 E 64th St., Indianapolis,
IN 46220 ................................................. (317) 253-9966
Helaine Victoria Press, 411 E. 4th St., Bloomington, IN
47401 ..................................................... (812) 331-0444
NWMF Panel Discussion Tape: Proceeds to benefit
WIA/NWMF. Send $7.00 to M.A. Bjarkman, 6826 Chrysler
St., Indianapolis, IN 46268. Make checks payable to M.A.
Bjarkman.

CHIROPRACTORS

Micky Craney, 93 S. Butler Ave., Suite 3, Indianapolis, IN
46219 ...................................................... (317) 356-4914
Farrell/Shaw Associates ...................... (317) 283-3623
Mary Gaul, Ed.D., 6360 Guilford, Indianapolis, IN 46220
................................................................ (317) 253-5160
Linda C. Gensheimer, MSW, ACSW, Fort Wayne, IN
............................................... (219) 426-5778 or 424-0248
Nancy VanArsdall Jones, MA, 6360 Guilford Ave.,
Indianapolis, IN ......................................... (317) 253-5160
Pat Jordan, MS ....................................... (317) 257-2350
Margaret Miholick, ACSW . ................... (317) 257-8590
June Thompson, ACSW, CADAC ............ (317) 251-7051

FLORISTS
Flowers Unlimited, 222 E. Market St., Indianapolis, IN
46204 ..................................................... (317) 636-5533

MASSAGE/RELAXATION THERAPY
Massage by Tela, Have table, will travel. For women
only ........................................................ (317) 257-3062

Pyramid Chiropractic, Peg VanDenburgh, DC, 8648
Purdue Rd., Indianapolis, IN 46268 .............. (317) 876-0887

Freda Neal, Alternatives for Health, 1217 Washington St.,
Columbus, IN .......................................... (812) 376-9194

Wellspring Wholistic Health, Evelyn A. Dysarz, DC,
7117 N Olney, Indianapolis, IN 46240 .......... (317) 841-8664

Serenity Tank Center, 2070 E. 54th St., Ste. #2,
Indianapolis, IN ........................................ (317) 251-9992

CONSTRUCTION/HOME IMPROVEMENT

Maryann Steinhart, 6407 N. Michigan Road, Indianapolis,
IN 46268 ................................................. (317) 257-2350

Vickie Harris, Furniture finishing, painting, stripping,
staining, varnish, etc ................................... (317) 353-6636
Janco Lock Service, Certified, bonded, insured ....... .
............................................................... (317) 291-1818
Jennifer Norrington, Specializing in kitchen and bath
design for home remodeling and construction ............. .
.................................. (317) 253-1460 (H) or 635-6123 (W)
Anne Shellabarger, Mooresville, IN ......... (317) 996-2115
Shipp Construction Co .. ..... (317) 254-9126 or 252-2404
Solar Accents, Window Tinting, 1511 N. Emerson Ave.
Rear, Indianapolis, IN 46219 ....... (317) 356-8722 or 632-5854
Sunshine Services .................................. (317) 353-6636

COUNSELING/PERSONAL GROWTH
Cooperative Martial Arts: Aikido & T'ai Chi, T'ai Chi
Ch'uan Academy, 2070 E. 54th, Suite 3, Indianapolis, IN
............................................................... (317) 251-2070
Courageous Living, Tim Davis, MS, Nancy O'Hara, MS,
CADAC ................................................... (317) 925-0043

Kay Whitehead, BA, MsT ....................... (317) 241-8905

PROFESSIONAL SERVICES
Mary A. Byrne, Realtor, 1202 N. Pennsylvania,
Indianapolis, IN 46202 .............. (317) 638-1020 or 923-5574
Haynes Bookkeeping, Tax service specializing in small
business and S-corporations ......................... (317) 293-3190
Clara Ann Merkel, French lace making .... (317) 241-8905
Olan Mills Not Ready For You? Gay/Lesbian couple
portraits .................................................... (317) 924-2028
Candace L. Shearls, Computer Consultant.. ........... .
............................................................... (317) 255-8328
Union Ceremonies and relationship celebrations for Gay
and Lesbian couples. Debra Harless, MDiv .... (317) 924-2028

RESTAURANTS
Westerfields Steakhouse, Lunch, Dinner and Catering,
6158 N. Hillside, Indianapolis, IN 46220 ........ (317) 251-2765

1

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August/September 1989

Page 11

In Tribute to Angry Women
A prose poem by Julia Trahan
I am an angry dyke;
my temper as black as my brow
as sharp as my nails
as impartial as a flood
that is seeking, always,
somewhere to stop.
I say these words because I want women to become who they
want to be. I am not talking about myself. I am talking about
women.
My body is held together by metal pins; each time I stand
chronic pain fills my legs and torso. This in itself makes me angry.
Angry that I have a broken body at the age of 23. People are stupid
about people with broken bodies. This is the source of my anger.
I am not saying these things to hear myself talk or to complain
about how oppressed I am. If anyone comes to me and asks me
about my handicap, I shall be quite disappointed, knowing that I
did not get my point across.
I could just as easily talk about one of the millions of women
who come to this country expecting fulfillment of their dreams;
instead of finding wealth, happiness and open arms, they find
systematic destruction and lies. I could talk about a woman
hunched upon her knees, the red blood puddles around her ankles.
She is naked. She is also dead. The victim of an abortionist who
already has all the money she could borrow tucked inside his
pocket. I could talk about the housewife married 25 years to a man
who calls her Lard Butt because she eats a lot, remembering the
times her alcoholic father drank it up. Married to a man who
punches her because she is "stupid." I could tell many stories, but
I'll refrain. Most of us in this room have been raped; we know the
stories too well.
Last night I dreamt of volcanoes. A volcanic eruption, like a
woman's anger, is a natural force that cannot be predicted or
controlled.

A volcano erupting with pure, raw energy, releasing built up
pressures. In my dream, this is what I saw.
Can you imagine what would happen if all women who have
fires waiting to explode removed the skins of respectability,
removed the layers of history? If their fury were expressed, a
volcanic explosion would look small. The Earth would be covered
with fire.
I want to explode as a volcano does, molten lava flowing over
lies and liars.
I do not want to be destroyed by my own anger. In order to
survive I have to express it.
It is for these reasons I accept with pride being called a bitch
or aggressively lesbian or evil woman. I simply, but not easily,
understand if called overbearing when I am being assertive or
trying to express a point or refusing to be destroyed by my own
anger.
I say to all women, whether your pain, your anger is private,
or openly expressed or unknown even to you
I am an angry woman,
an unreasonable woman.
If you are not, I question, why not? If you do not want to be
labeled as such, I ask you not to negate us so-called unreasonable,
angry, moody women. We are not bitches, or cunts, or evil. We
do not appreciate being told to be a little nicer, a little quieter, or
to change in some way that will make us more feminine.
And yes, I am unreasonable.
We are so unreasonable,
so perfectly reasonably, unreasonable.
It's a damn good way to be.

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Page 12

August/September 1989

LAVENDER VISIONS

Prejudice, acceptance, love -- themes in Fried Green Tomatoes
"FRIED GREEN TOMATOES AT THE WHISTLE STOP
CAFE." By Fannie Flagg.
Yes, this is the same Fannie Flagg from Broadway, T.V. and
all those game shows. This red-headed comedienne from Alabama is a born storyteller who has created a delightful small town
full of believable and endearing characters.
ReminiscentofRitaMaeBrown'sSixofOne,Flagg'sWhistle
Stop, Alabama, surpasses Runnymede, Maryland.
The style of the novel is both unique and effective. The
chapters are 2- or 3- page gems that have the cumulative effect of
weekly cliffhangers. The dialogue is real and funny and reflects
the author's years of skit writing. We even get to sample recipes
of favorites from the cafe.
By moving between the present and the Depression South,
and by giving us multiple perspectives, we learn about the lives of
the people of Whistle Stop. We eavesdrop on the stories of Ninny
Threadgoode at the Rose Terrace Nursing Home. We read the
Weems Weekly (written by Dot Weems) and learn of fallen
meteorites and of the new Philco radio at the cafe ("stop by to hear
Amos and Andy.') We also read articles in the big city newspapers
and follow the fortunes of Whistle Stop inhabitants who venture
there.
The themes explored include prejudice, acceptance, belonging, the importance of humor, what's important and what isn't,
fears about aging, and the effects oflove on the human experience.
When Idgie (age 15 or 16) is smitten with Ruth (age 21 or 22),
Momma Threadgoode warns the siblings, "Now, children, your
sister has a crush, and I don't want one person to laugh at her. Is
that understood?" But faced with an uncustomarily scrubbed and
hair-greased Idgie, they cannot control themselves and are dismissed from the table to roll on the parlor floor with laughter.
This is the story of Ruth and Idgie, who run the cafe and raise
a son together. It'salsothestoryofEvelynCouch who,atmid-life,
longs to find herself and a place to belong. And it's the story of

Sipsey, Onzell and Big George, the black folks who cook at the
cafe and of dozens of others who come to life in these pages.
The folk of Whistle Stop will bring tears and laughter into
your life and will live in your heart and mind long after you've read
about them.
(Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistle Stop Cafe is available
at Dreams and Swords.)

FANNIE FLAGG
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AUG/SEPT 1989

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