extracted text

THE NEWSLETTER OF FRIENDS NORTH, INC.,

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an association of lesbians,

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nd their friends.

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Property of

HERLAND LIBRARY
VOLUME

11

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ISSUE

2

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MARCH

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APRIL

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1997

transgender population is likely to be our largest minority group.
Learning tolerance and respect for diversity can help free our
community of prejudice and bigotry, and help reduce violence. Our
goal is to create northern Michigan communities where all individuals
are valued and respected.
PFLAG, GLSTN, Friends North and THIRDlevel corporations
The Help and Information Line telephone number in Traverse City:
announce a new, toll-free Help and Information Line.
61 6 / 946- 1804
by M'Lynn Hartwell If outside of Traverse City you may call: 800 / 579-8769
Traverse City-PFLAG, GLSTN, Friends North and THIRDlevel Information About Organizations:
corporations announce a new Help and Information Line to address
Friends North, Inc. is a regional social organization with over 600
individual and family concerns about same-gender affectional members. Friends North offers numerous events and activities
orientation through information, counseling and intervention. Trained throughout the year for individuals who are lesbians, gay men, or
THIRDlevel crisis staff will respond immediately to help individuals
bisexual.
and families cope with the difficulties they encounter as the result of
GLSTN: Gay Lesbian Straight Teachers Network, strives to assure
bias in our schools, family, church and community.
that each member of every school community is valued and respected,
The U.S. Department of Justice reported that "The most frequent regardless of sexual orientation. Through community organizing, public
victims of hate violence today are blacks, Hispanics, Southeast Asians,
Help Line (continued page 3)
Jews, and gays and lesbians. Homosexuals are probably the most
frequent victims."
The National Gay and Lesbian Task Force surveyed 2,000 gays
and lesbians and found that over 90% had experienced some form of
victimization on account of their perceived or actual sexual orientation
and one-in-five gay males and one-in-ten lesbians said that they had
been "punched, hit, kicked, or beaten." Ninety-seven percent of highHIGH TEA
school kids report regularly hearing some homophobic remark; 28
Traverse City Opera House - Sunday, April 27, 1997
percent of gay and lesbian students dropped out of school.

NORTHERN MICHIGAN HELP AND
INFORMATION LINE INSTALLED

FRIENDS NORTH UPCOMING EVENTS

Researchers have found that homosexual youth are at a greater risk
to experience isolation, peer and family rejection, harassment and
violence. They expend considerable energy hiding their "secret" from
friends and family, out of fear of rejection - rejection that often results
in being thrown out of the home and onto the streets. The threat of
physical and psychological damage to the developing gay teen is great,
and our Help and Information Line may be of great value to all
members of the family as they seek understanding. The Help and
Information Line will also assist people of all ages with lesbian or gay
parents, or other family. It is estimated that as many as fourteen million
children come from households with lesbian or gay parents.
Given the generally accepted statistics regarding the proportion of
gays in society, every city, town and rural community in America is
likely to have a significant number of lesbian and gay students,
teachers, parents and other people involved in every area of their
community. In fact, in northern Michigan the lesbian, gay, bisexual and

GAY PROM
May, 1997 - (Date and Location to be announced)

TRAVERSE CITY PRIDE EVENT
June 29, 1997

FRIENDS NORTH BIKE TOUR
August 8-10

AUTUMN HIKE
(Exact Date/Location to be announced)

FALL FILM FESTIVAL
(Exact Date/Location to be announced)

GAY HISTORY AND EDUCATION DAY - OCTOBER, 1997
(Exact Date/Location to be announced)

THANKSGMNG POTLUCK - NOVEMBER, 1997
(Exact Date/Location to be announced)

Richard Tuxbury

Friends North, Inc., P.O. Box 562, Traverse City, MI 49685-0562 (616)
946-1804 (This is a general information line to receive FIN
information.)
FRIENDS NORTH is an organization of lesbians, gay men, bi-sexuals and
their friends from northwestern lower Michigan. Located in Traverse
City, we provide social activities, a newsletter, phone line, workshops,
and a scholarship fund for financial assistance.
THE BOARD OF DIRECTORS of FRIENDS NORTH is composed of nine
women and men elected each December. Regular board meetings are
held at Grace Episcopal Church at the Corner of Washington &
Boardman the first Tuesday of every month at 6:30 p.m. Everyone is
welcome to attend.
Brenda Bartz - 616-946-2708/bbartzstar@aoLcom
Victor Dinsmore, Secretary- 616-459-5759/itsyrigloo@aoLcom
M'Lynn Hartwell - 616-943-8800/les n more@aol.com
Jim Ingleson - 616-922-0925
Carol Lambertson, Pres. - 616-27 5-7102/tclambo@gtii.com
Tom Kincaid-VP - 616-947-4647
Ben Maddy- 616-271-3926/coolj707@aol.com
Julie Parker - 616-276-9330
Sue Schwartz, Treas. - 616-946-3032/tcfriend@aoLcom
NEWSLETTER COMMITTEE: Publication of Networking 45° North.
Editor: Richard Tuxbury: 271-3042
or e-mail: tux0 0 1@ aol. com
Publishing & Layout: Richard Curtis: 616-929-9605
or e-mail: rlc@traverse.com
Advertising: Ric Nelson: 616-933-7116
Mailing List: John Evans: 922-0746
Networking 45° North is the newsletter of Friends North, Inc. Viewpoints
expressed do not necessarily represent those of the board or general
membership.
CLASSIFIED ADVERTISING and notices are run without charge. Please
submit in writing or by calling the editor (and leave ad on machine 2713042 or by email.)
DISPLAY ADVERTISING in Networking 45° North is available in Business
Card size - $25.00 per space per issue or an annual rate of $120.00 for
6 issues. Inserts and larger sized ads are .available. Please call
'advertising' for rates.
SPONSORING POLITICAL POSTCARDS: Cost for printing 2,800 postcards
for Networking 45° North is $100.00. To sponsor all or part of this, and
to give your input, call Richard 271-3042.
CONTRIBUTIONS to Networking are welcome. Letters, essays, features,
reflections, and original artwork should be sent "c/ o Editor" to above
address. (Networking will not accept material that is sexist,
discriminatory or sexually explicit. Contributors are responsible for
obtaining permission from those whose names they submit for
publication.)
DEADLINES: Issue #3, April 15. Issue#4June 15, Issue#5 August 15.
ADDRESS CHANGES: Please notify us in advance if a change is coming.
Call John Evans, 922-0746, or send changes to our address.
SUBSCRIPTIONS/MEMBERSHIPS: $15.00/ single; $25.00/couple. Please
send checks or money orders to: Friends North, P.O. Box 562, Traverse
City, MI 49685-0562.
DISTRIBUTION: Networking is published 6 times per year. Copies are sent
bulk-mail in a plain envelope to approximately 700 households.
Additional copies are available at select local establishments. Our
mailing list is not sold or traded with other organizations.

FROM THE EDITOR
Politically, our new year has gotten
off to a mildly disappointing start.
Many of us wished Bill back in the
White House for another term, and then,
he must have forgotten how much we supported him. He never once
used either the "g" or the "I" words in his State of the Union address.
However, when the Employment Non-Discrimination Act gets
reintroduced this year, Bill has publicly vowed to give it his wholehearted assistance.
On the other side of this presidential administration, Vice
President Gore has expressed an interest in educating himself about
gays and lesbians and recently asked gay leaders for advice on which
books to read. A few were suggested: Before Stonewall, Randy Shilts'
Conduct Unbecoming, and The Celluloid Closet.
Individual states have been busy building barriers to stop the
homosexual marriage menace that will soon invade the mainland
from Hawaii. To date, almost half the states have passed laws that
prohibit the recognition of same-sex marriage, despite the fact that
marriage has yet to be legalized in any state. Hawaii is still wrestling
with the issue, but same sex marriage should be recognized there
sometime in 1998.
Many members of Congress are busying themselves with at least
two unnecessary and self-aggrandizing amendments to our
Constitution. One protects the American flag from being desecrated,
and the other calls for a mandatory balanced federal budget. I worry
that our Constitution can be tampered with too easily if these move
forward . It is then just another step away from their proposing to
outlaw same-sex mariage via another amendment. .. or who knows
what!
Locally, I hope that at least a few people rose early enough to
watch the two-day Rita Melotti (TV 29) show that focused on samesex marriage. Thanks to Guy Molnar, Cindy Robb, Rev . Emenheiser
from Grace Episcopal, and Benjamin Maddy, the gay/lesbian
community had excellent representation and interpretation.
The second day of the show, our state representative, Michelle
McManus, was on the speaker phone during the half hour program .
She defended her support of Michigan's banning same-sex marriage,
and attempted to rationalize how her stand against gay marriage was
also a stand for equal rights for everyone.
Without a hint of sarcasm, McManus proclaimed, "I feel that
Michigan's banning gay marriage is not discriminatory towards gay
men, because heterosexual men are also not allowed to marry." I have
paraphrased, as it was done in typical 'Michelle-speak.' It is opinions
such as this that have earned her a seat on Engler's Michigan's Civil
Rights Commission . Now she has been officially charged to do for all
other minority groups what she has done for gays and lesbians.
We are still looking for contributions, so please consider
submitting your essay or thoughts for our upcoming issues this year. If
you have any questions, please call me. Our newsletter will be much
better with YOU in it!

~

printed on recycled paper
NE1WORKING 45°NORTH

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VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

Help Line (continued from page 1)

Carol Lambertson

advocacy and in-school programming, we are working to end
homophobia and heterosexism in this generation through educating
today's students. We welcome as members any and all individuals,
regardless of sexual orientation or occupation, who are committed to
seeing this philosophy realized.
PFLAG: Parents, Families, and Friends of Lesbians and Gays
promote the health and well-being of gay, lesbian, bisexual,
transgendered persons, their families and friends through
• Support to cope within an adverse society.
• Education to enlighten an ill-informed public, and
• Advocacy to end discrimination and to secure equal civil rights.
THIRDlevel: Provides 24 hour crisis intervention, information and
referral services; youth and family services; short term counseling; and
support groups such as Windfire for lesbian and gay youth.

FROM THE PRESIDENT
I have had many people talk to me about "what
it used to be like" in the Grand Traverse area with
respect to the gay community. Gatherings used to
happen only within the safety of people's homes.
Then some folks got brave and organized dances, first hanging brown
paper on all the windows of the rented building for protection from the
public eye. And who can forget those dark and smokey Den dances?
However, times have changed in our area, albeit slowly. The Den
dances have disappeared, but Traverse City has a gay bar that has
survived. We have a monthly lesbian coffeehouse that has existed for
over three years. There is an expansive and labeled Gay/Lesbian section
in our newest bookstore. Last year the Bay Theater set aside a Sunday
afternoon for a movie to benefit Friends North, and gay issues even get
mentioned in the local press occasionally; though the issues are not
always positive - at least we're not ignored.
In fact, I took a few minutes to quickly list as many of the gay or
gay-friendly people, places and things I could think of, and came up with
quite a slate: Networking 45 Degrees North - our excellent newsletter;
Out 'n About Lesbian Coffeehouse; Weekly Gay M Meetings; The Rap
Group - monthly gay discussion group; The Bookie Joint; The Petoskey
Thursday night dinner group (weekly); PFLAG monthly meetings;
GLSTN meetings; Lesbian Adventures - bi-monthly gatherings; Monthly
Friends North Board Meetings; Wellness Network; Monthly Out 'n
About Coffeehouse Planning Meetings; Gay Book Discussion Group at
Border's Book Store - Monthly; Gay Pride Celebration Planning
Meetings; Newsletter Stuffing Party.
(NOTE: Details regarding most of the above can be found
elsewhere within this newsletter)
This is by no means an all-inclusive list, but I think you get the idea
that if you are looking to either get involved or just meet other likeminded people, you don't have to know the secret handshake. There
are plenty of opportunities.
Some of the above mentioned groups or activities are part of Friends
North and some are not. However, we attempt to cooperate with one
another when planning our various events. Therefore, on January 5th,
1997 the Friends North Board met with representatives from some of
the above groups in a "retreat" setting to discuss common issues and
concerns. The Board asked for input and entertained requests and ideas.
During the latter half of the day, with all guests having departed, the
Board then sketched out the yearly event calendar.
Since we are awaiting confirmation of several locations and dates,
information is incomplete at this time. However, we have placed the
Calendar of Events in this issue in case you are inspired with ideas or
suggestions. We welcome your input and still have lots of planning time
for most of the events - just call the help line, leave your name and
number, and we will call you back.
We will be updating the calendar with each newsletter issue.

COMMON VOICES
Ed Richardson
Exciting things are happening in the Friends North Rap Group.
Please delete "Rap Group" from you brain data base and replace with
our brand new name - "Common Voices." I would like to thank
Alan Williams for suggesting this more reflective name. Alan has also
volunteered to do promotion for our group that welcomes ALL gays
and lesbians-regardless of age-to our monthly gatherings held in
the basement lounge at Grace Episcopal Church, 349 Washington
St. at 7:30 pm on the second Wednesday .
As always, Common Voices offers a safe haven and supportive
atmosphere. Often, there are selected topics and related videos but
there is always time to consider personal problems. Common Voices
has no difficulty being a sounding board. If you are new to our local
gay/lesbian community, Common Voices wants to welcome you! If
you have not been to a Common Voices gathering for some time,
please come back. You are missed! If you know of someone who
needs Common Voices, please encourage them to come. Our
welcome mat is always out- don't knock, just walk-in!
Common Voices will also be gathering for dinner at a local
selected restaurant on the first Wi;dnesday of each month at 7:00 pm.
We want you to join us! Please contact myself (Ed) at 947-4697 or
Tom at 275-6127 for the restaurant choice of the month (or for any
questions about Common Voices.) (There was discussion at the
January Common Voices gathering that the monthly restaurant outing
be entitled "Common Nibbles" - what do you think???

•

..

FRIENDS NORTH BIKE TOUR, AUGUST 8-10

(616) 941-8868

Join us for a spectacular weekend of biking and
socializing in beautiful Leelanau County. Call
Friends North for an information packet."
NE1WORKING 4S'NORTH

'Fax (616) 941-9063
•'Hrs 9am-7ym 'Dai(y • Out

ef town yfione 800-876-8868

1081 S. 'ltiryort 'Road West, 'Traverse City, 'M'l 49686 (Cofonia( Square)

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VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

Out,n

Out 'n About Lesbian Coffeehouse is managed by an informal
gathering of lesbians who are dubbed the "Steering Committee." This
Committee meets for a few hours on the Monday prior to the 3rd
Saturday coffeehouse for planning of each month's event. The
Committee is always seeking input from you, the lesbian community,
about wbat or who Out 'n About should feature in upcoming months.
Please join the Steering Committee so that your ideas can be heard
and so that you can make a positive impact on your own community.
Without your input and assistance the Coffeehouse will not succeed.

+About
A Lesbian Coffeehouse
Unity Church - 3600 Five Mile Road - Traverse City
Call 946-2708 for more information
The Out 'n About
Lesbian Coffeehouse is very
pleased to present to our
lesbian
community
the
passionate,
percussive
rhythms and powerful vocals
of Irene Farrera. Her music is
inspired by the rich culture of
the
South
American
continent, where she was
born
and
raised
in
Venezuela. She has been
Irene Farrera
performing professionally for
more than 15 years. Irene's repertoire includes the contemporary
sounds of Brazil and the Caribbean. She composes beautiful songs
with lyrics in Spanish, English, and Portuguese. She also interprets
songs by well-known Latin American composers. Her work reflects
the essence of the Latin spirit, offering fierce passion, romantic
tenderness, and diverse experience.
Irene Farrera will be on the Coffeehouse stage on Saturday,
March 15. The Coffeehouse is open from 7:00 p.m . until 11 p.m.
Please show your support of a wonderful performer and the Out 'n
, About Lesbian Coffeehouse with your attendance.
In April, the Out 'n About Lesbian Coffee.house is planning a
" Favorite Card and Board Games" evening. Please bring your decks
of unmarked cards for a spur-of-the-moment friendly Euchre match
or a challenging Gin rummy tournament. Also bring any of the
myriad varieties of board games (i.e., Monopoly, Clue, Shoots and
Ladders, Yahtzee, (Lesbian-modified Mystery Date, Trivial Pursuit,
Pictionary, etc.) to the Coffeehouse. It is all happening on Saturday,
April 19, from 7 p.m. until 11 p.m. Prizes awarded to the individual
who is selected by the entire group as the lesbian who best fit the
category, "Plays well with others. "

Out n' About Lesbian Coffeehouse is held on the third Saturday
of each month except August and December. The Coffeehouse
comes alive between 7:00 and 11 :00 pm at the Unity Church,
3600 Five Mile Road, Traverse City. Smoke-free and Chem-free
with a cover donation of $3-5 ($5-$10 if we have entertainment).
Coffee, tea and snacks are free; soft drinks are available.

For more information, or to have your name placed on the Out 'n
About Lesbian Coffeehouse mailing list, call Brenda at946-2708leave message.

BOARD NOTES:
In an attempt to maintain good communication among the Friends
North Board of Directors, the membership and the readers of this
newsletter, we are adding this section to provide you with a synopsis of
what really happens at our board meetings.
We welcome feedback in the form of phone calls, letters to the editor
and attendance at the board meetings. Please let us know if this
information is helpful to you!
On January 7th the Board met for it's first monthly meeting of 1997.
The major points of business for that meeting included:
• Review of our financial report - an excellent job was done by
incoming treasurer, Sue Schwartz. It is summarized below:

•

BANKERS LIFE AND CASUAL IT COMPANY

=
$ 3290.19
Opening Balance as of 12/1/96
Total Revenue
=
$ 285.00
Total Expenses
$ 562 .12
Closing Balance asof 12/31 /96
$ 3013 .07
There was discussion about the ensuing toll-free telephone number
which will be answered for Friends North, PFLAG and GLSTN at
Thirdlevel Crisis Intervention. The Thirdlevel staff will be 'inserviced'
by representatives of Friends North, PFLAG and GLSTN. A contract
will need to be signed, and then service can begin. Anticipated date
is February 10, 1997. (See related article in this issue).

A Trusted Name In Insurance
For Over 100 Years

•

Long Term Care • Medicare Supplement
Income Replacement • Home Health Care
Annuity • Health • Life

We appointed the newsletter editor and publisher. This has to be
done at the beginning of each year and thankfully the same people
- Dick Tuxbury and Richard Curtis - accepted these positions.

•

A policy/procedure was approved, along with an application form
for the Friends North Scholarship fund (formerly known as the
Community Needs Fund). These items are available from our
treasurer, Sue Schwartz, or any board member. A copy is located
elsewhere in this newsletter.

814 S. Garfield Ave. Suite C
Traverse City, MI 49684
(616) 947-4390
S-5205
NITWORKING 45'NORTH

LINDA L. WIKLE
Agent

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VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

•

An introductory letter was approved which will be sent to all
people requesting information about Friends North along with the
most current copy of the newsletter. In the past there was no
consistency as to how this was done.

•

Our bylaws call for the appointment of an Executive Committee
consisting of the President, Vice President and one other board
member. Victor Dinsmoore was appointed by the Board as this
third member.

•

Plans were finalized for mailing renewal letters to members with
lapsed renewal dates. Approximately 300 renewal requests will be
mailed. [Note: at this writing approximately 75 renewals have been
received-thank you!!]. We also approved a special mailing of a
flyer reminding folks of the Winter Sports Party on Feb. 23.

•

have been received so far. There was lengthy discussion about
what to do with names on the list of people who don't respond.
Some board members feel that if people haven't renewed their
membership then they should not receive a copy of the newsletter,
since it costs about $1 per issue. Others feel that everyone should
stay on the mailing list regardless of whether or not they have paid
a membership. We are carrying names from as far back as 1993.
[The renewal date is on the mailing label right after the name].
Further discussion was tabled for future meetings to include the
editor and publisher.

There was general discussion about a request made to the board
during the Board Retreat from a young person who is interested in
establishing a Safe Schools program and a gay/straight alliance in
the high school. The request was for money to assist with mailings,
etc. Since no official bus_iness may be conducted at the Board
Retreat, the item was placed on the agenda for our first meeting.
Our by-laws state that to become a member of Friends North a
person must be 18 years of age or older. Board consensus was that
in order to provide financial assistance to someone, that someone
must be a Friends North member. One board member offered to
have a discussion with our attorney, Madeline Thomas, regarding
this issue. This item was tabled until discussion with the attorney
takes place.

•

The updating and maintenance of the mailing list and database was
discussed. General consensus was that while there is room for
improvement in our current system, confidentiality must be
maintained when considering updated software and the
transference of the existing information. Further discussion was
tabled pending additional information on existing database.

•

New letterhead design was approved.

$ 3013.07
$ 1310.00

$ 490.53
$ 3732 .54

•

The president stated that a notebook of "policies and procedures"
would be started. When a process is identified by the board that
would be best passed on to a new board in writing, it will be
written, submitted for board approval and filed in the notebook.
There is no specific method presently in place for instructing
incoming board members on the business details of Friends North.

•

There was discussion on the results of the recent membership
renewal mailing. Approximately 86 (out of 300+) renewal forms

& LESBIAN BOOK GROUP

Aimee/Sheila McRae/awesome@freeway.net
On the last Monday in March (the 31st to be exact) and every
last Monday of every month thereafter, Aimee from Borders Books,
Music, and Cafe, will be facilitating a Gay & Lesbian Literature and
Studies Book Group. In March we'll discuss "And Say Hi to Joyce"
by Deb Price and Joyce Murdoch. But even if Deb and Joyce aren't
your cup of tea, please come on out and show your interest in the
group so that we may all decide what to read next month, or even
decide if we need two separate groups (one for gay lit, one for
lesbian). Books chosen for discussion receive a 20% discount at
Borders, and we try to just read paperbacks to keep the cost down
and make the book group accessible to everyone.

Financial report:
Opening Balance as of 1/1/97
Total Revenue
Tota I Expenses
Closing Balance as of 1/31/97

The issue of membership in Friends North include persons under
the age of 18 years was tabled as there has not been a complete
response from the attorney.

GAY

Board business at the February meeting included:
•

•

,r - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - ,

HAIR FORCE ONE
SOI West Front Street
Traverse City. MI 49684

502 E. Eighth St. • 616-94 7-1965

For Appointment Call

COPIES • PRINTING • SHIPPING • FAX

941-8255

Joann Ewing • Brian Bensett • Richard Curtis
Mark Lizenby

NETWORKING 4S'NORTH

A DIVISION OF LASER PERFECT PLUS, INC.
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VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

Contributions

with a Canadian friend the other night on the phone and he was
telling me about how much his views on homosexuality have
changed over the years. They have changed by educating himself and
meeting gay and lesbian folk. He said putting a face to a name is so
important in reaching out to others.
I'm not sure how we got on the topic but, we started talking about
people having regrets in life. I told him I really didn't have any, as I
think holding on to past mistakes is not productive or positive. He
said he only has one regret in life and if he could turn back the clock
he would. He told me of when he was in middle school and one
sunny day, after lunch, his classmates were outside playing. There
was an effeminate boy who was by himself and often was the butt of
many bad jokes. It was assumed that this boy was gay. Well my
friend in Canada, was dared by his buddies, to walk over and smash
a piece of cake in this boys face. And he did. He said if there was
ever a way to track this guy down and tell him he's sorry, he would
do it. Strange how things always come back to us. Guilt can be a
horrible thing to carry around. I'm glad my friend in Canada has
grown over the years to understand diversity and how important it is
for all of us. I hope he can move on and get rid of his past regret.
Best wishes to the Safe Schools project going on in Traverse City.
If you would like to get some information on this contact, M'Lynn
through Friends North or at GLSTN Traverse City.
Until next time, seek out positive people, influence others and
educate our community. I look forward to writing to you in the next
newsletter.

FROM THE COMMUNITY

NOitS,jOTIINGSAND NEWS FROM THE NORTH
by Greg R. Baird
Hello everyone! Since my last column in Jan-Feb, my life has
been so busy with many wonderful happenings. I found it difficult
to write about one topic this time around as I had so much to share.
So I am mixing a pot of literary soup and pouring it out for everyone
to take a taste.
My last column I had asked people to write me and tell me if they
feel a sense of community in their area and where do they go to find
it. I also had asked if they didn't have that community feeling to write
me and possibly I could hook them up with a group. Well, the mail
has been rolling in, but I'm always looking for more. I am going to
use this information for a future article and also to guide some people
in a positive direction.
*Some people who have responded from the U.P. tell me they
have nothing to do, and that most people either go to a local straight
bar to hang out or attend one of the occasional dances they have in
Canada. Other folks meet for movies or potlucks and some inquired
about the Gay dinner group in Petoskey. (Every Thursday at 7:00 pm
at the Park Garden Cafe)
I had a lovely letter from a lesbian in Traverse City, telling me of
how she finds it hard to meet people in the area. She is older and
would love to find that sense of community and meet other mature
lesbians. Going out for lunch and movies occasionally would be a
lot of fun for her. Now I don't want to play' matchmaker like in
"Fiddler on the Roof", but I would like to direct this lady in the right
direction. Any suggestions would be welcome.
I had the pleasure of meeting and working with Jeanne WhiteGinder, mother of Ryan White, when she came to North Central
Michigan College to give a lecture in October of 1996. She was
impressed by my work in speaking out in support of gay and lesbian
youth and the community I live in . So as Jeannes' guest I am getting
ready to leave in a few days to go to Chicago and speak at The 4th
Annual Ryan White National Youth Conference on HIV/AIDS. I will
be speaking to youths ages 14 to 25 and adult service providers who
work with youth on "Starting a Gay/Straight Alliance in School and
Building a Positive Community." This is a wonderful opportunity for
me and something I have always wanted to do.
Being a positive role model for gay, lesbian and bisexual youth
is something all of us adults should be doing. I am looking forward to
bringing back information on HIV/AIDS, gay, lesbian and bisexual
issues and many other agenda items. If your school or group would
like to have me speak, please contact me. A special thanks to Friends
North and H.A.N.D.S for supporting me in this venture in Chicago.
Have you ever had someone say something to you that was a bit
profound and you couldn't get it off your mind? Well, I was talking

NElWORKING 45°NORTH

DENIALS OF CONSCIOUSNESS
Cindy Robb
Recently, my 21 year old gay son moved home from Chicago.
Benjamin is a del ightfu I young man who was going through some growth
crunches of "what do I want to do with my life," I was happy that he felt
close enough and comfortable enough to go through this growth with
us, his family, and had the guts and confidence to come back to the rural
farm town of Suttons Bay where he grew up and knew too wel I the
homophobic attitudes that exist here.
One day, he was really down and said to me, "Mom, I wish I had all
my school pictures of myself growing up so I could just see how I've
evolved to where I am today." I said, "Follow me." We went to a small
room in the basement, and with a bit of rearranging, I uncovered a very
large trunk. I had not thought about the trunk for many years. It was
packed full of EVERYTHING I had saved of Ben's, his lifetime in a box so
to speak.
We opened it and both sat on the floor cross-legged and began what
would become a long afternoon examining everything from his fifth
grade bug collection, to his baby book, to book reports, school papers,
report cards, pictures, scrapbooks, articles, letters, clothing from special
occasions, and every gift he had ever made for me. We laughed and
laughed until our sides hurt, and then at the very bottom of the trunk was
a plastic bag. I pulled it out and removed from inside, a small tattered

-6-

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

Denials (continued from previous page)

A BROTHER'S STORY

pair of tap dancing shoes. We both just stopped, tears spilling into our
eyes, for these worn tap dancing shoes represented something very deep.
I immediately felt sadness and shame.

Alan Williams
I've known him for over a year now. When we met over the Internet
(via a mutual friend), he was not quite 16 years old-a shy, scared kid who
lived in my hometown in Illinois. We've never spoken on the phone, and
we have only seen pictures of each other, sent over the 'net-but we think
of each other as brothers we wished we had instead of our biological ones.
We even call each other "bro" when we talk over the 'net. He was unsure
of himself, trying to reconcile his strict Christian upbringing with the fact
that he might be gay.
We traded long letters. He would write about how he hated himselfmostly how he hated the idea that he was gay. I would write back about
how being gay is not an easy thing to deal with at first, and how it takes
time to adjust. I would remind him that hating himself didn't make the
journey any easier. "Don't give up hope," I would write, time and time
again. "There are others like you out there. It's just a matter of time until
you find them." He would write to me about his dreams of how much
better life would be when he had a boyfriend. I would write back and tell
him that happiness lay within, not in the arms of a fantasy lover.
He slowly started to change. He stopped hating himself for being gay.
He accepted it, and he acknowledged the frustration of living with parents
who couldn't understand him, and living in an area where being young
and gay was a sure-fire recipe for being bashed. He went from "I hate being
gay" to "I hate being gay where I am ." I wrote to him that a time would
come when being gay and being himself would be one and the same.
"There will be a time and a place," I wrote, "when you will be able to leave
the closet behind ."
Our conversations moved to the Internet Relay Chat. On IRC, I could
respond directly to what he wrote, and even as our friendship grew, he
found over IRC what I couldn't give him. He found other gay teens. He
was no longer alone, but he was stubborn. "There are others like me," he
wrote, "but they're all so far away." At least he'd made a few steps.
Time and time again I worried about him. I would talk to my friends about
him. When I met my boyfriend, he would sit and listen to me talk about my
little brother. He started talking to my brother too, and in time my boyfriend
became my teenage friend/brother's "brother-in-law" and a new confidant.
Another teen came to IRC, and lo and behold, he also lived in my
hometown. My brother was scared to talk to him at first-"What if he's
really a basher?" he asked-so I spoke to the newcomer and found him to
be just what he said he was-another lonely gay teen in need of a friend .
"Talk to him," I told my brother. So they did. It wasn ' t easy at first-they

I think Ben felt badly for me because he knows how much I love him
and how I would never consciously hurt him, and yet here in my hands I
held the evidence to prove my early denial of who my wonderful son really
was and is today. We both knew, without saying a word.
In 1981, Ben was six years old. I was a single mom and I worked three
jobs to support us. I always worked when Ben was either asleep or in
school. That way, he would think I was always home for him. Ben's
interests centered mostly around the arts & entertainment category and I
didn't see any problem with any of it until he came home and asked to
take tap dancing lessons. I remember like it was yesterday thinking, oh,
no, can't you play baseball, or do something more like a "boy." I thought
he'd get teased and he already was really exhibiting "sissy" type behavior,
I never spoke my conscious thoughts, but SAID, "Well, I'll think about it. ..
but I don't know ... "
I was just hoping this whole thing would just go away, but it didn't.
Instead of saying 'no' without a good reason, I simply said, "I can't afford to
pay for tap dancing lessons." I thought the issue was moot, and I felt relieved,
that I could now be more comfortable in my unconscious denial.
Working three jobs and being home during Ben's waking hours was a
trick! I worked the night shift in our local hospital, and on Saturday mornings
Ben was home but I needed to sleep, so he would wake me and tell me of
his plans for the morning, and I would get up around noon. It seemed to me
that he was spending a lot of Saturday mornings with "Brian," one of the
boys on our block, but I was glad they had such a good time together.
Reality slapped me in the face one Saturday morning when Ben walked
in the door a few minutes later than usual, and handed me a pair of tap dancing
shoes and a letter and said "Please Mom, don't be mad." I sat down and
opened a letter from the Meg Nutting School for Dance. Mrs. Nutting and I
knew one another personally. The letter read, "Dear Cindy; I would do
anything not to hurt you and I truly hope this does not embarrass you, but Ben
has been coming to my Studio of Dance every Saturday morning for the past
four months and has shown great interest in taking tap. He just sits and watches
my class so intently and I'd inquired many times as to his interest and he finally
told me you cannot afford to pay for lessons. I have given Ben this pair of tap
shoes for five dollars, and have agreed to give him lessons for one dollar of his
allowance money per week, but I still need your permission."
Feeling very guilty, I gave my permission. It wasn't until eleven years
later, Ben had the courage to finally come out to me so I could face what I

Brothers (continued next page)

had denied all along.
What those tap shoes represent for me today is the commitment I have
to all gay and lesbian youth. I gave my son food, shelter, clothing, my time
and all my love and it was not enough, for he knew i didn't want to know

Carolyn R. Delo

who he really was. Today, through my work with PFLAG, I help other
parents "wake up" far earlier than I did.

Sales and Leasing

As a matter of fact, a few weeks ago, I spoke with a mother who thinks
her seven year old might be gay. That child has a much better chance of

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Traverse City, Michigan 49686

growing up healthy, without pain and confusion.
I am committed that my goals for public education of all youth on gay

Telephone 616-941-0770
FAX 616-941-8145
1-800-942-4 724

& lesbian issues, will become a reality in my lifetime.
Opening that old trunk that day was no accident. As we walked up the
stairs, I turned to Ben and said, "Now do you remember who you are?" and
he simply smiled and said, "Thanks, Mom."
NETWORKING 45°NORTH

-7-

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

Brothers (continued from previous page)
liked each other, but each thought the other was disinterested. I became
the facilitator, counselor, and pillar of support. I relayed messages, lent the
not-so-occasional virtual shoulder, played cheerleader, smacked the wall
in frustration, talked to my boyfriend for hours on end about everything.
Over time, the fri'end I cared for like a brother, and the newcomer whom I
saw as a friend now, started to open up to each other.
Which naturally meant a monkey wrench would enter.
I got a call from my boyfriend. He asked me to get on line to talk to my
brother. When I arrived on IRC, I got the news: The newcomer's parents
had discovered their son's secret. They were thinking of throwing him out
of the house because they didn't want any "queers" living under their-roof.
My first thought was a last resort. If my new friend was thrown out of
his house, I would take him in. It was a first thought because it would mean
he was safe; it was a last resort because I couldn't stand the thought of the
two boys being separated by hundreds of miles. My brother became his
friend's pillar of support; they would talk to each other on the phone, and
then my brother would come online for advice and a listening ear. I saw
my brother become a strong young man, with a big heart and a developing
real love for the teenager with whom he'd shared so much. It made me
wonder how someone not even related to me could be so much like me,
for he was responding to his friend the same way that I had responded to
him-answering the call of someone who was hurting.
I was so proud of him.
Things calmed down. No one was kicked out of his house. Things
began to turn around, and on Valentine's Day, the two boys met for their
first date, bringing with them all the feelings that had been growing
between them, as well as their feelings about being gay. Afterward my
brother wrote to me. "I can actually say," he wrote, "that today was the
first day that I was proud to be gay, and felt good about it. I can now
realize how normal being gay is and that I like that I am." He told me
that what had helped, besides the date, was the issue of XY magazine (a
magazine for gay youth) which I had sent to his friend, and which he had
received from his friend that night.
I smiled as I read the screen. My brother was finally accepting himself.
He wrote to me again, of a chance meeting the next day with his nowboyfriend. He told me how good it felt to be in each other's arms in a long
hug, and how much he felt for his new boyfriend. "I haven't told him yet,"
my brother wrote, "but I think when I get done talking to him tonight, I'll
tell him that I love him. Because I really do." In the time that I have known
him, this unofficially-adopted little brother of mine has gone from a shy,
scared kid to a young man who has faced his fears and come through them
with love in his heart, and someone to share that love with.
I couldn't be prouder if he were my own brother.

AFFIRMING CHRISTIANITY
by Linda Wilson
This article is in response to various articles that have appeared in
Networking 45° North in the past in reference to "spiritual" or "religious"
concerns. I offer the following as one viewpoint of an evangelical
Christian Lesbian.
Having learned how easy it is to misunderstand what someone is
saying due to the lack of a definition of terms, let me define what I mean
by "evangelical" and "Christian" (I am assuming I do not need to define
"lesbian!").
By evangelical I am referring to the belief that the Bible is the Word
of God, that there is, in fact, a God who has revealed Himself through
Jesus Christ, that Jesus Christ is the One through whom one finds eternal
life and forgiveness of sins, and that one can have a personal relationship
with this God by accepting the life that Jesus Christ has offered. In the old
fashioned terminology, one can, indeed, be "born-again" to a fulfilling
spiritual life by choosing to follow the Jesus Christ of the Bible.
By Christian I am referring to those who claim to follow the Lord
Jesus Christ and who live their lives with the purpose of seeking to know
Him better and to live according to the principles set forth in the New
Testament. "Church" refers to those who have chosen to believe in and
follow Jesus Christ as the "Savior," whereas "church" refers to
denominations.
Fundamentalists are those who believe that they hold all truth in
their group, and feel they have an obligation to keep the faith as they
define it, pure and undefiled by any opinion that might differ from what
they believe to be true. They cite Old Testament stories of "God" telling
Israel to stomp out the enemies and to maintain themselves as separate
and distinct from the surrounding peoples, as evidence and authority that
today, as the Church of god, they must eradicate the "opposition" which,
in one instance, happens to be us!
It is important not to react in like kind to the type of angry, irrational
behavior that the churches have demonstrated towards the gay and
lesbian community. My own mother supports the OCA in Oregon and
subscribes to both Pat Robertson's and James Dobson's literature. She is
such a sweet person in so many ways, but she has never taken the time
(nor does she have the inclination), to study any other possible biblical
interpretation than the one she has heard in her church and in the
literature she receives.
There are thousands of examples that one could find to prove the

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VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/APRIL 1997

point that some will never take the time to listen to a differing opinion.
This may be a fault of the church, but it is certainly not the fault of the
Church. Those who are truly part of the Church recognize that they do
not hold all truth in their hands, and that there just might be something
outside of their knowledge that is, indeed, truth.
For me, any truth is from God because I start with the premise that
God is pure truth, pure love, etc. However, because of the deep hurt that
has been caused by those who call themselves Christians, especially by
those who call themselves evangelical Christians, it is necessary to write
an article such as this one. Why? Because I too am an evangelical
Christian who is so deeply committed to Jesus Christ.
I cannot conscientiously be a part of any of those groups because
they have a flaw in their understanding of the Bible that does not permit
one to be committed to Jesus Christ and be called an evangelical
Christian, and be gay or lesbian!
However, it is an entirely inappropriate response to turn away from
the truth of the Bible and the meaningfulness of a relationship with Jesus
Christ and the power of the Holy Spirit to grow in that relationship,
simply because the church has problems. Yes, I have trouble with
churches. No, I do not have trouble with Jesus Christ. Nor do I have
trouble with the Bible as my sole source of information about Jesus
Christ, and the principles for living as explained in the New Testament.
I am unable to live completely that which I fully understand, let alone
worry about those parts I do not!
I wish everyone who loved and followed Jesus Christ would
demonstrate by their tolerance and understanding, His attitudes and
attributes. I wish I could do that completely . But I am imperfect and
working on areas of my life that need to be healed, transformed,
stretched, and much more. The experience I have with Jesus Christ is so
much more precious and meaningful that the obvious hatred and anger
of others who claim to know Him, that I hold on to my faith and ask that
He would somehow touch their lives. However, to turn from my faith
because of the inconsistency, mean-spiritednes, and error of a large part
of "Christian" churches, would be no different than not taking advantage
of many things that are good for me but are abused by others (i.e., motor
vehicles, medicine, sex, food, love, government, religion, etc.)
When I was in the church, I heard accusations that we were
intolerant and unloving towards those who were "pagan." Now that I
am outside of the church I find that those who are not Christians can be
intolerant and unloving as they claimed the church was. My choice of
my faith, my personal relationship with Jesus Christ, and my belief in the
Bible as God's Word, deserve to be respected by those who do not agree

m
,f

with me in the same manner as they wish for me to be respectful of their
choice to believe or not believe in something of their own. I do not follow
my faith blindly, nor with a lack of intellectual integrity. I do not choose
to be an evangelical Christian oblivious to the sickness that pervades so
much of traditional church life these days. I study profusely to come to
the conclusions that make up the meaning in my spiritual life. And I am
at peace.
If there is enough interest to do so, I would gladly provide a study of
different passages in the Bible to show that they are being interpreted in
light of what some groups wish to have as their agenda against gays and
lesbians. The reality of both history and church history proves them
wrong, as well as do the actual words used in the Bible that today are
translated as "homosexual."
No where does the Bible specifically condemn loving, same-sex
acts. Also, the words that could have been used, had the writers wanted
to specify "loving same sex acts," were not used - neither in the Old or
New Testaments. The major "proof" Scriptures are Leviticus 18:22 and
20:13, Genesis chapters 18, 19, and 20 which recount the story of
Sodom and Gomorrah, Romans 1:16-32, I Corinthians 6:9-11, I Timothy
1:9-10, and the book of Jude, verse 7.
Not one of these passages in the Hebrew Old Testament, Greek
New Testament, or Greek Septuagint, uses the words that were
commonly used to signify homosexual. None of them is used to define
homosexuality as sin. Obviously, if the actual word for homosexuality is
not even used, then it follows that it is impossible for it to be classified as
a sin from these Scriptures. If God hated homosexuals and homosexuality
(loving same-sex relationships) so much, one would think, (since He is
believed to have inspired the writers) that He could have at least used
the words that everyone in that time and place understood to mean
homosexuality. However, He did not. That is a highly significant fact.
There is more. It takes a long time to discuss all the ramifications of
condemning homosexuality because many other traditional beliefs (i.e.,
the belief that marriage is principally for the purpose of procreation, the
purpose of the Law, etc.) have to be dismantled one by one to come to
the truth of the Bible.
To conclude for now: if you were, or are, a Christian and gay or
lesbian, and would like to follow your faith with joy and peace, rest
assured you certainly can! You are a great and wonderful creation of a
loving Creator. He made us, and He loves us.

Linda Wilson , BS, MA, DD is a practicing massage therapist
in Suttons Bay, Michigan, an instructor at Kirtland Community College, and
presently is seeking ordination.

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VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

TI IF TI IE D

IL A
(Note: All classified announcements as well as personals are run without
charge. Please submit them in writing to the Friends North address, or
call the editor (616-271-3042) and leave the advertisement on the
answering machine along with a contact phone number)

NEW ANNOUNCEMENTS
VOLLEYBALL!: Anyone interested in playing volleyball at the 1998 Gay
Games in Amsterdam, please call to discuss. Contact Bill at 616-845-5220.
(issue 4)
GLSTN - Traverse City: The next scheduled meeting is March 17th at 7:00
pm, at Third Level on Front St., in TC, and the featured speaker will be Greg
Baird, from Petoskey. Greg has just returned from the Ryan White
convention and will have a lot to share with the group. All are welcome!
Contact M'Lynn at 943-8800 (issue 2)
GAY-LESBIAN BOOK DISCUSSION GROUP is meeting monthly on the first
Tuesday of each month, 7:30 pm, at Border's Bookstore on S. Airport Rd.,
T.C. For info, call Border's at 933-0412 and ask for Joe. (issue 4)

ON-GOING ANNOUNCEMENTS
GAY GAMES IN 1998: Team Great Lakes is organizing for the upcoming
games in Amsterdam, scheduled for August 1-5, 1998. Those interested,
please call Ann Heier at 810-547-4692. Team Great Lakes sent 180
individual athletes and teams to New York City in '94. (Issue 6)
BI-MONTHLY, Bl-SEXUAL, WOMEN'S LUNCHEON: Meet the first and third
Tuesday of each month, from 11 :30 am until 1:00 at a local, Traverse City
restaurant Call Pamela at 922-0734 or contact Friends North. (issue 2)
PLEASE SPONSOR OUR POSTCARD PROJECT: They do make a difference!
The cost for printing the 2800 postcards is $100.00. To contribute specifically
to the Postcard Project, please call Richard at 271-3042 or send a check (in
an amount of $100.00 or less) directly to Friends North. (issue 4)
QUESTIONS ABOUT HIV AND AIDS? Call locally 24 hours a day to 9471110. This program is sponsored by the HIV/AIDS Wellness Networks Grand
Traverse Area and is staffed by Third Level Crisis Center volunteers. (Issue 6)
THE UNITARIAN UNIVERSALIST CONGREGATION OF PETOSKEY is
meeting at the Concord Academy, 2230 East Mitchell St. Services will be
held on alternate Sundays with dates disclosed in their newsletter, Diversiti.
Please call 348-3117 for details or write to us at POB 271, Petoskey, Ml
49770-0271 (Issue 6)
REPORT HATE CRIMES!! The Triangle Foundation of Michigan has begun a
VICTIMS' PROGRAM COMMUNITY WATCH COALITION. The group will
collect hate-crime information from Lesbian and Gay victims of such crimes.
For details, call 313-533-1166 or 51 7-753-9823. Report Hate Crimes! Stop
the Violence! (issue 6)
GRAND TRAVERSE COUNTY HEALTH DEPARTMENT: Their Reproductive
Health Clinic is open to women and men of all ages. Confidential services
provided are physical exams, HIV counseling and testing, pregnancy testing,
sexual transmitted disease testing and treatment, all methods of birth control
available, FREE Norplants, Depo-Provera, IUDs, and Condoms. For more
info about these and other methods which are charged on a sliding fee scale,
call 922-4630. Services are by appointment only. (issue 6)

PERSONALS:
ROOMMATE WANTED for shared housing. Private room with cable,
laundry, for $21 0lmonth. Phone 935-3749 (issue 2)
GWF-Age 51, shirt and jeans woman .. . loves good company, long Sunday
drives, country music, nature, picnics, camping, and much more. I am
honest, sincere, caring and romantic. Looking for a good close friend and
possibly more, so any singles out there, please write. I will answer all.

NflWORKING 45°NORTH

-10-

Sharon, 8595 N.E. Limits, Mancelona, Ml 49659 (issue 2)
GWF-43, Never married. Looking to meet new friends; soon to have new
location-hopefully real soon. Redneck town's not for me after six years
moving back home from the city. Time to move on and out. Write to: Vickie
Gliech, 17768 S. Tilson Rd., Rudyard, Ml 49780. Relocation upon finding a
new residence and the sale of the current residence. New job location with
Restaurant Mgmnt. as profession. Send name, address and or phone number
and I will respond. (issue 3)
ROOMMATE WANTED TO SHARE 3 bedroom home in north T.C. Person
must like animals, nonsmoker; close to lake, washer/dryer, large yard.
References and Deposit: Shelley 946-1085 (issue 2)

GROUPS:
FRIENDS NORTH BOARD AND MEMBER MEETINGS: The Friends North
Board meets on the first Tuesday of each month at 6:30 pm. at their NEW
LOCATION at Grace Episcopal Church, corner of Washington and
Boardman Streets, across from the Old Courthouse. ALL ARE WELCOME,
(issue 1)
COMMON VOICES-FRIENDS NORTH RAP GROUP is a group of men and
women who get together monthly for informal discussion, often on a
particular topic. Please join us on the 2nd Wednesday of every month at
Grace Episcopal Church, 349 Washington, T.C., at 7:30pm. For information,
call Tom at 275-6127 or Ed at 947-4697. (issue 2)
GLSTN, the Gay-Lesbian-Straight Teachers Network, is meeting the third
Monday of each month at 7:00 p.m. at Third Level, 1022 East Front Street,
Traverse City. They welcome all interested educators. For more information,
call M'Lynn at 943-5050. (issue 6)
P-FLAG: (Parents, Friends and Families of Lesbians and Gays.) This is a
network of parents, friends, and families of lesbians and gays who meet
monthly to offer information, support, and a place to talk with others about
the issues concerning them. Gays and Lesbians are also welcome and
encouraged to attend P-FLAG meetings. Meet at Grace Episcopal Church
every third Wednesday of the month, at 7:30 pm. For more information call
Cindy Robb at 271-5045 (Issue 4)
WINDFIRE: This is a local youth support group for teens and others under
the age of 25, which meets on a weekly basis in an atmosphere that is
comfortable and friendly. Please contact Third Level at 922-4800 or 1-800442-7315 for location, date and time. (issue 2)
OUT 'N ABOUT is a lesbian coffeehouse featurrng entertainment as well as
a chance to meet others from the area. It all happens at the Unity Church,
3600 Five Mile Rd. in T.C. Please see the Out 'n About calendar elsewhere
in this newsletter for times and specific activities. (issue 2)
TRAVERSE CITY FRONTRUNNERS If you are interested in running, call Paul
or Jim at271-4510 and leave your name, number, and that you are interested
in Frontrunners. We will return your call with information on where to meet.
All ages and abilities are welcome. (issue 4)
WELLNESS NETWORKS SUPPORT GROUP is for people with HIV or AIDS
and they welcome you to attend. Please drop in Monday evenings from 6:00
to 7:30 pm at the Grace Episcopal Church library at 341 Washington in
Traverse City. Every fourth Monday of the month the Significant-Other
Support Group will be meetingat3301 Veterans Drive, Suite 221, just north
of S. Airport Road. For further information, please call 933-0279. (issue 6)
THE PETOSKEY GROUP: A social group for lesbian, gay and bi-sexual
persons is meeting weekiy in Petoskey. The group meets at 7 p.m. Thursdays
at the Park Garden Cafe on Lake Street. For information please contact Tim
at 348-8151 (issue 3)
NORTHERN MICHIGAN WOMYN'S CHOIR is always looking for new
voices. To obtain more information or for a performance schedule, please
contact Deb at 275-5924. (issue 3)
H.A.N.D.S is an HIV/AIDS Network located in Petoskey. They are currently

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/APRIL 1997

FRIENDS NORTH SCHOLARSHIP FUND
As mentioned in the President's Column, the Friends North Board recently developed and approved a policy/procedure
and application form to access the Friends North Scholarship Fund (formerly known as the Community Needs Fund). You
will recall that part of each membership fee is designated to help maintain this fund, as well as other donations which are
specified to go into this account. This fund is yet another benefit of becoming a member of the organization! Contact any
board member or call our phone line to receive an application.
FRIENDS NORTH, INC
SCHOLARSHIP APPLICATION

FRIENDS NORTH, INC
SCHOLARSHIP FUND

Application Date: _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __

POLICY/PROCEDURE

Applicant Name:

POLICY:

Address:

Phone:
Are you a current Friends North Member:

Yes

No

Verified by:
(Board Member)

Friends North, Inc., shall maintain and administer a
scholarship fund available to members in good standing of
Friends North. Monies for this fund shall be collected from
donations, a percentage of membership fees, and Board
approval of gener"l operating funds. These funds are to be
used specifically for gay/lesbian/bisexual/transgender
educational pursuits.

Amount Requested:
Needed by:
(date)
Total Fees (if different from above amount:
Event Title: _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __
Event Location:

-----------------

Event Date: _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __

Mail to:
Friends North, Inc.
PO Box562
Traverse City, MI 49685-0562

PROCEDURE:
1. Application is made by any member of Friends North
to any member of the Board of Directors.
2. A majority of the Board of Directors must approve
the scholarship request (in quorum) at the next
scheduled Board meeting. (At the discretion of the
President of the Board, this may be done in an
informal meeting, i.e., phone, via fax, e-mail, etc.)
3. A maximum scholarship of $100 or any portion
thereof may be awarded.
4. Scholarships are limited to once per year per member.

Received by: _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __
(Board Member)
Approved: _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __
(Board President or Designee)
Approval Date: _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __
Check No.:

-----------------

Date Check Mailed to Applicant:

Treasurer's Initials: _ _ _ _ __

5. Scholarships are awarded on a first-come, first-served
basis as funds are available.
6. Scholarship recipients are required to report to the
Board (oral or written) within sixty (60) days of the
event date.
7. The Board of Directors may, with a 2/3 majority of
the full Board, direct a larger amount than the
maximum to be awarded.

ALBRECHT & JENNINGS ART ENTERPRISES
3546 Woodland Trail
Williamsburg, Ml 49690

616-938-2163

MICHELANGELO, MACKINTOSH
and 200ARTDEALERS IN CHICAGO
FRIDAY,MAY9-SUNDAY,MAY11,1997

-----------------------------------------------------DETACH AND S E N D - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

MICHELANQELO, MACKINTOSH and 200 ART DEALERS IN CHICAGO
MAY9-MAY11, 1997
NAME

-------------------------------

ADDRESS

------------------------------

CITY

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -STATE- - - -ZIP- - - - - - - -

PHONE-DAY
EVENING
-------------SINGLE _ _ _ _DOUBLE
TRIPLE_ _ _ _ SMOKING yes no
KING _ _ _ _TWINS
ROLLAWAY_ _ _ _HANDICAPPED ACCESSIBLE yes no
ROOMMATE(S) _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __
We will NOT assign roommates
CREDIT CARD #_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ EXP. _ _ _ _ MC, AMX, VISA, CB, DC
(TO HOLD THE HOTEL ROOM)

NAME ON CARD

----------------------------

Enclose $112.00 (check or money order, NO CREDIT CARDS FOR REGISTRATION) for transportation and museum
tickets. THIS MUST BE RECEIVED BY APRIL 2. NO REFUNDS AFTER APRIL 2. Please pay by check or money
order made out to Albrecht & Jennings Art Enterprises.

SURVEY FOR SPEAKER'S LIST
P-FLAG is compiling a list of persons who would be willing to speak to groups
and\or participate in panel discussions.
From time to time P-FLAG receives a request from a group or organization
asking for discussion concerning our gay\lesbian children and friends and our
relationships to our community.
This is an excellent format Parents and Friends can use to share their
acceptance and appreciation. It is yet one more opportunity for our gay and
lesbian friends and children to share their stories.
PLEASE FILL OUT THIS QUESTIONNAIRE TO HELP US FILL THESE REQUESTS
NAME: _________________________________
ADDRESS: _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __
PHONE: _________

day

evening

TIME OF DAY YOU WOULD BE ABLE TO ATTEND: _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __
TOPICS you would be comfortable discussing:
Parenting- - - - - - - - -

Family Concerns

Legal Issues - - - - - - -

Human

Local Issues- - - - - - -

Myths

Local\National
Local\National

----------Rights
-------------

----------------Statistics
---------------------Opportunities
--------------------

Other:

Comments:

--------------------------------

Information/resources/training are available.
Please contact or send this form to: Penny Smith
10960 Blue Ridge Ln #37
Traverse City, MI 49684
Phone:
(616) 947-4462
E-mail ar967@traverse.lib.mi.us
Fax: (616) 929-5593

seeking volunteers in the northern lower peninsula and eastern upper
peninsula of Michigan. HANDS is a non-profit organization that has
committed itself to helping and supporting the needs of HIV infected persons.
They offer a number of services, including support groups, education, pub Iic
awareness, and one-on-one friendship support. Volunteers are urgently
needed in the Alpena, Gaylord, and Rogers City areas. If you would be
interested in the program, please call 616-526-9213. (issue 6)
GAY ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS: Meetings for gays and lesbians are
held each Saturday at 11 :00 am and have been moved to a new location at
Grace Episcopal Church, corner Washington and Boardman Streets in TC.
For further info, call John at 922-0746 or Tom at 947-4647. (issue 6)
FRIENDS LIKE US: A social group in north east lower Michigan for gay,
lesbian, and bisexual people. Meets monthly. For info, please contact Jeff@
517-354-7702, or write to him at POB 391, Alpena, Ml 49707. (issue 4)

SHARED LETTERS Reactions to the death of Gerry Crane
with thanks to Kathryn Ho/din for submitting

Crane gave so much to world
I knew Gerry Crane. My family and I met Gerry and Randy through
mutual friends, and we consider ourselves fortunate. Gerry was a
decent, kind and honest young man who had a solid, strong
commitment to educating children, to his life partner Randy, to his
family of friends and to God.
He had the courage of his convictions and he didn't lose this
courage or his convictions in what was probably the worst trial by fire
of his -life. This
world needs more
principled people,
more men like
Gerry and Randy
who aren't afraid
of commitments,
who
are
and
willing to stand up
for
what
they
believe regardless
of the adversity
and personal cost.
And what a cost it has been. His smile and his music have left us.
Gerry Crane was an honorable man, and he will be missed, but
he will not be forgotten. His time in this world was too short.
Cheryl Me/lb/om, Grand Rapids.

LETTERS
Thank You,
As one of the two friends who helped Carol at the end, and who
was with her from the beginning of her battle, I deeply appreciate the
comments from Ed Richardson and Gene Strang in your last issue.
Carol was a "people" person, but during her two-year ordeal, she
used all her strength to fight the cancer. Unfortunately that took her
out of the community.
To those who helped over the two years, giving her rides to the
hospital, etc. thank you.
To Ed, Gene & John who saw Carol shortly before her death, thank
you for caring.
On a personal note, to those volunteers and care givers who are
helping a terminally person now or will in the future, I pray God gives
you strength. I never could have imagined how difficult it could be,
emotionally and physically.
Hospice was absolutely wonderful, but we found that nurses,
either the Hospice of privately paid, were not available. Trying to get
some away time was nearly impossible.
Volunteers and care givers are very important, and although its
frustrating at times, and you feel you aren't doing enough, don't
despair. You are helping someone the best, you can. Even if you don't
think that person is aware. You are with them at a time when no one
should be alone. Feel good about yourself for that.
Kathy.

Follow Christ's message of love
I have been following the controversy in the Public Pulse letters
regarding the Byron Center teacher, Gerry Crane.
The anger, sadness and self-righteousness has gone on long
enough to turn everyone's stomach.
If I recall, in the Bible (which so many have taken to thumping so
very soundly) Christ gives us a new commandment to love one
another. I don't recall Him giving us the right to judge anyone. He
doesn't call us to judge-only to love, for love is the fulfillment of the
law. Love does not harm to a neighbor. And we are told that God is a
just judge who rewards the good and punishes the wicked. But we are
not called upon to make that distinction.

L, '-' ,.J

JenTees
customlscreenl printing

,41P

Full Service Apparel Printing

Team Uniforms T Buttons T EmbroideryT Photo Items
516 E. Eighth St. Traverse City, MI.

Open Monday-Saturday- 6:00 pm - Sunday at 2:00 pm

616..-929 ... 3610

616 ..- 935 ..- 1666 ..- 520 Franklin..- Traverse City, MI 49684
Proudl Ga Owned and O rated since 1989

NETWORKING 45°NORTH

-11-

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

Recently a writer to this column compared Byron Center to Salem
and the castigation of Mr. Crane to the witch hunt of the 1600s. Maybe
those who resent being called witch hunters and huntees ought to do
some serious historical study.
For almost 300 years since the "witch trials" the city of Salem has
set aside one day a year for prayer, reflection and atonement for the
wrongs done to those men and women accused, tried, sentenced and
put to death, mostly in the name of envy, greed and self-righteousness.
There's a message and lesson here. Is anyone paying attention?
Jean H. Taylor, Grand Rapids.

Crane's gift was music
Mr. Crane was a wonderful teacher. He taught us how to enjoy
music. In band we played many different kinds of music. He
introduced music from all different types of cultures to us.
The most important thing he taught us was how to really enjoy
music, which was by putting all our effort into playing a piece so it
would be perfect. Also, he taught us that we should never settle for
anything that is less than our best.
I know some people didn't agree with how Mr. Crane lived his
life, but who do they think they are to judge him and others like him?
Mr. Crane was always honest to us and always had us give it our all.
I think Mr. Crane was a gift from God. He helped us so much. He
put his heart into teaching us. Everyone thought he was a good
teacher. It makes me angry how when people found out that he was
a homosexual, they started turning their backs on him.
Doesn't the saying go, "Do unto others as you'd have done unto
yourself"?
Melissa DeMunter, Student, Byron Center High School

T. T . T
•

JUNE

29

IJ&lfo ¥/f .

T . V(f

T

.

AT THE ROBB FARM

tfJliJ

~RIDE "GARAGE SALE" Now's THE TIMET
•

T
•

T

•

... to staret collecting Treasures and
Junque for the Pride Sale.
So when spring cleaning
or just tripping over them...

•

T

•

T

Call Jim lngleson 922-0925 to arrange donations •

T • T

tfJlfJP{eltJJIIPf'dl(Jtl• •

Char P. Kirchner,

SECT ADMITS TO BOMBINGS
ATLANTA -A letter purportedly from a group called the Army
of God claimed responsibility for bombings at an Atlanta abortion
clinic and a gay nightclub, and threatened "total war" against the
federal government.
The letter was one of two claims of responsibility for the
February 21st bombing at The Otherside Lounge, which injured
five people.
Federal agents were examining a message left the day after the
bombing on the voice mail of the Phoenix-based Gay Community
Yellow Pages that claimed that the "Sons of Confederate Klan,
S.O.C.K., a new neo-Nazi KKK organization from Los Angeles"
had bombed the club. The message did not mention the attacks
last month on the abortion clinic.
The letter, which the FBI received Monday, promised future
attacks on gays and also sought to set up a system to confirm
claims of responsibility after future bombings.
'We're taking it seriously. We're looking into the validity of
the letter and the claims that they're making," said Pamela
Swanson, spokeswoman for the Georgia Bureau of Investigation.
FBI spokesman Jay Spadafore would not comment on the
authenticity of the letter, which was mailed to The Atlanta JournalConstitution and the Reuters news agency on Saturday and turned
over to federal authorities.
The letter was handwritten in block letters on three pages of
lined tablet paper, the newspaper reported, and said the Sandy
Springs abortion clinic was bombed because of the "murder" of
"3.5 million children" a year.
It said a second bomb that detonated 67 minutes after the first
"was aimed at agents of the so-cal led federal government," against
which it threatened "total war." The letter said Friday's bombing
"was aimed at the sodomite bar."
In Washington, President Clinton told an audience at a fundraiser that everyone must fight hate crimes. 'The recent bombing
of the gay nightclub in Atlanta reminds us that this work is not
over," Clinton said. "We have to stand against those things ."
Authorities are investigating possible links among the
nightclub bombing, the Jan. 16 abortion clinic attacks and the
bombing at the Centennial Olympic Park last summer.

T • T
~

CPA, MSA

>
.c
0.
0

Tax Returns - Confidential & Discreet

616

933
7116

Single Taxpayers - Use your filing status to your advantage
Un-Married Couples - Take advantage of all your options
433 W. 7th

Appointments in Williamsburg or Tra1/erse City
P. 0. Box 1040
Williamsburg, MI 49690-1040
NETWORKING 45' NORTH

St.

Traverse City

(616) 267-5818

Ml
-12-

49684

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

WORDS AND MUSIC: A LOOK AT
BOOKS, MAGAZINES, CD's AND TAPES
Rick Could
Spring is around the corner, last chance for Winter reading.
Here's a list from different book and music stores around our
Michigan area.
At The Bookie Joint, Shelley says they've had such a great
success selling new at 25% off that they'll stay in the new book
business for a while. Also, they have a growing selection of used
books at half the original cover price. This book business is on the
cutting edge these days! Shelley gave us these suggestions:
Too Queer, by Victoria Brownworth, $10.50, save over $3.00.
Brownworth's writing screams "Pay attention!"
Finale, edited by Michael Nava, $8.25. Murder, mystery and the
macabre, chronicled by today's best gay and lesbian mystery writers.
The Alyson Almanac 1997 Edition, edited by Gerry Kroll, $8.98. An
all-new edition of the most reliable book available to the gay and lesbian
community with a cyber guide to lesbian and gay on-line services.
And music: Between the Covers, Cris Williamson and Tret Fure,
Cassette- $9,95, CD-$14.95. Long time musicians and mates, this
duo creates some love-ly music. (Tickets to their May 9 Lansing
concert are available at the Bookie Joint.)
Work Out, the ultimate disc for exercise and dance. Cass.$10.95, CD-$16.95 .
At Borders, Aimee gave us this list:
Stages of Desire: Gay Theatre's Hidden History, by Carl Miller,
$17.95 . Sort of a "Celluloid Closet" for the theatre, Miller's book charts
the history of gay and lesbian representation on stage, from
Shakespeare to the 19th Century. Gives a fresh gay look at many classic
plays and brings forth rediscovered texts with gay or lesbian themes.
1997 Damron Women's Traveler, $11.95 Don't leave home
without this indispensable guide to everything lesbian on the road.
Provides a city by city look at where to stay, what clubs to check out,
special events, and community centers. Great for the girl who is
always on the go.
Funny Time to Be Gay, Ed Karvoski, Jr., $12 .00 Introduces us to
over 30 gay and lesbian comedians who tell their stories and those of
the gay community in ways guaranteed to make you smile, and quite
often laugh out loud. Pokes fun at stereotypes and makes us realize
that life is indeed what you make of it.
At AB CD's, Norm gave us these suggestions:
The English Patient, Original Soundtrack. From the Academy Award
nominated film. This is a guaranteed Oscar winner for best score.
Underworld, Second Toughest in the Infants. Techno at its very
best. This is a can't miss issue that appeared on several "Best of" lists
for the year end in 1996.
Gay Happenings, Volume 4. We loved Volume 1, we like
volume 2 & 3 - so here's Volume #4. Included with this volume is
Alicia Bridges, Hannah Jones and Sin with Sebastian.
Of Rage & Remembrance, Corigliano Symphony # 1, Leonard
Slatkin and the National Symphony Orchestra. Music defined by its
inspiration, signal works from the AIDS era. Symphony, mezzosoprano, Men's Chorus, boy soprano, low strings, timpani and
chimes. This was a Grammy-awarded nominated recording.
NE1WORKING 45°NORTH

Picture This, Jim Brickman. The thirc;J installment from solo
pianist on Windham Hill Records. In its second week of release, it's
already number 43 on the Billboard Charts. Featuring country vocalist
Martina McBride.
At Open Mind Books in Sault Ste. Marie, Dan gave us the
following suggestions:
Meow-mories, by Julia Willis, $6.95. No, it's not the
unauthorized biography of Andrew Lloyd Webber. It's that lesbian
humorist offering a charming, rib-tickling illustrated "baby book" for
cats. Not scotties?
Rainbow Arc of Fire by Greg Sanchez, $11.95. A novel of magic
and enlightenment set amongst the gay community of Colorado.
. Out With It: Gay and Straight Teens Write About Homosexuality,
edited by Andrea Estepa and Al Desetta, $8.00. In magazine format, this
title offers eye-opening insights on how young people view Les/Bi/Gays.
Mythology of Transgression: Homosexuality as Metaphor, by
Jamake Highwater, $23.00. An analytic work that explores how
sexual outsiders create cultural change.
At Waldenbooks, Kevin gave us this list:
Life is Not a Rehearsal, by David Brudnoy, $22.95. When this
conservative talk show host returned to his show after a hiatus, he
shocked his audience with an electrifying monologue in which he
revealed that he was gay and HIV-positive. The overwhelming
~upport he received from an audience not usually tolerant of gay/
issues was an even bigger surprise. Read this memoir.
Best Gay Erotica 1997, selected by Doug Sadownick, edited by
Richard Labonte. $14.95.
Best Lesbian Erotica 1997, selected by Jewelle Gomez, edited by
Tristan Taorimo. $14.95.
Dream Boy by Jim Grimsley, by $11 .00. This novel recounts the
story of first love between two adolscent boys who bravely sustain
each other in a world of domestic disintergration.
Coming out of Shame: Transforming Gay and Lesbian Lives, by
Gershen Kaufman, Ph.D . and Lev Raphael, Ph.D. Now in Paper back
at $11.00. This book exposes the role shame has come to play in the
lives of gays and lesbians, and how to begin a path toward growth
and acceptance.
Sanctuary: A Tale of Life in the Woods, by Paul Monette. Illustrated
by Vivienne Flesher, $16.00. This is the fine author's last work.
At B. Dalton's, several gay periodicals are carried, including
Advocate, Out, and Genre.
These stores appreciate your business and suggestions.

-13-

Activator Method (low force technique)
and gentle manual adjusting
Massage Therapy
Holistic Health & Wellness Educator
814-B S. Garfield• Traverse City, MI 49686
Res: 616-275-2502 • Office 616-933-4424

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

'

NEWS IN BRIEF

Christian Reformed Church in Canada Supports Gays

Henderson Doesn't Discriminate
The City of Henderson has apparently become the first
municipality in the state of Kentucky to publicly state that it does not
discriminate in employment matters based on sexual orientation .
Without public fanfare, celebration or dissent the words "sexual
orientation" were added to the non-discrimination list and to all
employment applications.

Israeli Military Grants Equal Rights to Gay Partner
The Israeli military recently made a landmark decision by
granting the rights of a spouse to the gay partner of a deceased officer.

Cobb County, Georgia Turns Against Past
Bill Byrne, the Chairman of the Cobb County Commission, said
that the anti-gay resolution of 1993 is history. With a new Board as
well as with the push of the Cobb Citizens Coalition, the Board
rescinded the original resolution which forced the Olympic
Committee to ban events from taking place within the county .

Austin Elects Lesbian Sheriff
Austin, Texas, the self-described progressive capital city of a
conservative state, elected the first open lesbian to the post of sheriff.
Margo Frasier, a lawyer and former jail supervisor in Travis County,
defeated her Republican opponent by a four point margin. She also
became the first woman to assume the position .
"People in Austin have a reputation for being a real fair-minded
community," said Kathleen DeBold of the Gay/ Lesbian Victory Fund.
Frasier' s opponent did not use her sexual orientation as an issue in
the campaign, saying that it wasn't relevant.

There is Gay Life in Rapid City
South Dakota' s first statewide organization for g/I/b/t persons
opened offices on Rapid City's Main Street in early February. Space
is provided for a gay library, a community center, and offices for the
group. Nearly 800 books and more than 1,000 periodicals are in the
collection at present.

Anchorage Allows Gay Clubs
The Anchorage, Alaska School Board has passed a final decision
regarding school clubs. They decided to continue allowing noncurriculum clubs, including the Diamond High Gay/Straight
Alliance. An amendment was included, however, to require parental
permission slips be signed-forms which must include the club's
statement of purpose- before a student can be permitted to join. That
amendment passed. This decision effectively ends the debate over
school clubs .

Don't Ask-Don't Tell Upheld
The U.S. Court of Appeals in San Francisco upheld the military's
ban on off-duty homosexual conduct, ruling that the poli cy is
constitutional even though it treats gays and heterosexuals differently.
The decision is the third by a federal appeals court to approve the
Clinton administration's policy on gay and lesbians in the military.
Judge Pamela Rymer said for the court: "For nearl y 20 years, w e have
upheld the constitutionality of the military's authority to discharge
service members who engage in homosexual acts. W e have
concluded that maintaining effective armed forces is indisputably a
compelling governmental purpose and that the policy of excluding
from the military those members who engage in homosexual conduct
is rationally related to that purpose."

Wayne-Westland, Michigan Schools Adopt New
Policy
The Wayne-Westland School Board has adopted poli c ies
banning "discriminatory harassm ent" of employees, board members,
and students on the basis of religion, race, color, nation al origin,
SEXUAL ORIENTATION, age, sex, height, weight, marital status,
handicap or disability. This policy applies to employees, vendors,
contractors or others doing business with the school district, students,
invitees, guests, etc. The new policy was adopted unanimously by the
Board of Education in January.

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Ellen's Big Day Set
According to the February 14 Hollywood Reporter, ABC has
tentatively set April 30th as the date for Ellen to come out as a lesbian .
"The final thumbs-up on Ellen's outing depends on ABC and Disney
executives approving a script, which has not.yet been submitted, "
spies said. Additionally, sources have revealed that Oprah Winfrey
has been approached to play Ellen's therapist.

NETWORKING 45°NORTH

An official body of the CRC in Canada, the Canadian arm of the
Grand Rapids, Michigan-based Christian Reformed Church, has
provoked a firestorm of controversy on both sides of the border. It has
told the Canadian government it supports legislation protecting the
civil rights of gays and lesbians in regard to housing, employment,
and other services. The church also suggested that legislation should
somehow accommodate same-sex partnership, arguing that
"mutually supportive relationships of a private and perhaps intimate
nature other than those understood by the familiar and historic terms"
of family and marriage "should be given a wholly new designation. "
(A more detailed report may be found in the RNS Daily Report,
@www.religionnews.com)

-14-

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relationship conflicts
addictions
eating disorders
depression & anxiety
stress management
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pain management
women's issues
childhood trauma
spiritual crisis

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

ESSAY

MCMANUS JOINS CIVIL RIGHTS PANEL
TRAVERSE CITY-State Rep. Michelle McManus, a leading
opponent of "reverse discrimination," has been given the top Republican
spot on the House Constitutional and Civil Rights Committee.
McManus, R-Lake Leelanau, vowed to work for "individual rights"
as opposed to "group rights" in her post as vice chairwoman of the
committee. In the past, she has sponsored legislation to ban preferential
treatment based on gender, national origin, religion, age, height, weight,
familial status or marital status.
"Choosing to support group rights at the expense of individual rights
perpetuates bias and pushes people farther apart," McManus said in a
prepared news release. "I look forward to working on this committee as
an advocate for every resident, and not just a select few."
Her legislation would have affected affirmative action plans of state
and local governments.
The civil rights appointment didn't sit well with Marvine Stamatakis,
chairwoman of the Traverse City Human Rights Commission.
"It is a setback for women, people of color and gays and lesbians."
she said. "I know she is opposed to affirmative action. I've never heard
her make any statements supporting civil rights issues. I feel there is a
valid issue to righting past wrongs."
McManus also was reappointed by the Republican Party to the
revised Human Services and Children Committee and the Conservation
Environment and Recreation Committee.
'

Get Ready for the ...

199 7 MICHIGAN PRIDE MARCH
Bill Beachler, Publisher Cay & Lesbian News, East Lansing
The plans for the 1997 Michigan Pride March are well underway.
This years activities will occur on June 20, 21 and 22, 1997. The
march and festival this year will again be on Saturday based upon last
year' s success. Block these days off your calendar now!
The Michigan Pride Committee has chosen the following theme:
FREE TO BE ... The GLBT community should be free to be happy, free
to be employed, free to be married, free to be home owners, free to
be pregnant and have children, free to be healthy, safe, out, alive,
loved and in love. These are the basic human rights that all people
should have and the equal rights the GLBT community wants.
Based upon 130 couples participating in last year's marriage
ceremony, the Committee hopes to continue the ceremony. Also, this
year the Committee is introducing a few features-the Living SAFE
Project. This project will include issues such as breast cancer, HIV/
AIDS, sexually transmitted diseases, substance abuse and partner
abuse. Based upon the success of last year's beer tent sponsored by
Mill Beer, the Committee is again looking for corporate sponsors.
Finally, the Committee is considering having a community picnic at
the Potter park Zoo on Sunday to include volleyball, canoeing,
biking, roller-blading and barbecuing as well as exploring the zoo.
The bad news last year is that the Committee ended the march in
debt. Therefore, the Committee has become a 501 (c)(3) organization
and is looking for memberships and donations. Checks may be made
payable to Michigan Pride and mailed to P.O. Box 16191, Lansing,
Ml 48901. If you have questions, you may call the Pride Hotline at
(517) 482-8656 or visit the Michigan Pride World Wide Web site at
http://www.myne.com/501 c/michprid/michprid.htm

NE1WORKING 45°NORTH

-15-

Ian Whitney
I have never heard any one state that growing up is an easy
process. If it were, then perhaps more people would attempt to do so.
In any case, growing up is a difficult and grueling road trip that leads
from one state of mind to another, never ending. For the "typical"
straight person, the transition into adulthood is, well, hellish. It is like
driving down a highway on which there are many traffic jams that
one must navigate through in order to reach the targeted destination.
In this analogy then, the road for gay adolescents is more like a
two-track in the Arctic Circle. This road is also covered with jammed
traffic, and in the sections that are one-way, semis with full trailers
speed towards you in the wrong direction . You just have to deal with
it.
I am, in may ways, an exception to the stereotypes that even
people in the older gay community and myself have developed about
gay youth . Or, perhaps I am not. In any case, most of my family (both
immediate and extended) know that I am gay, and they are all as
accepting and supportive as they can possibly be. The initial reaction
of most of my relatives has been, to this point, one that focuses not on
my sexual orientation or behavior but rather on how my sexual
orientation will make my life harder. Overall, however, being gay has ,
not made my life as difficult as the lives of many gay teenagers, and
that is an assumption- I know very few gay youth in this area (they
are there, but not out), and am therefore forced to rely upon
generalizations. I have seen the statistics, but then again, they are only
numbers. Knowing the people is different.
Aside from those at Interlachen (which is my school and another
reality altogether, and unreality but the way that it should be), I know
very few gay youth. I can say, with near confidence, that I know all of
those who are out within the gay community. At the high school in
Traverse City, there are only two "openly" gay people ("openly-" will
admit to someone other than themselves that they are gay), and even
they are somewhat closeted. In Traverse City, especially at the school
level, being closeted is part of everyday existence. I guess that this is
where I am, at most, an exception. I am so far out of the closet that I
can no longer see its entrance. Though this is not something to brag
about, it is nothing to be ashamed of. But it often confuses me.
Honestly, the hardest part of growing up gay is, in my case, being
one of the few "out" people in Traverse City. I often ask myself why I,
at seventeen, am more "out" than people twice or three times my age.
To some in this area, I am the first openly gay person that they know.
I had thought that the closeted part of the gay community was just
insecure, ashamed, or lacking courage. I have come to realize,
however, that those are not the reasons. Stepping out of the closet is
not always the best choice socially, personally, or economically. For
me, life has seemed much easier since I came out. Perhaps not easierit just makes more sense.
Making sense out of life is hard to do. Why am I gay? Why do
people hate me because I'm gay? I cannot make sense out of that.
Perhaps when I am older, I will undrestand. No. I will never be able
to understand hate. It is hard to understand love too. If only we would
sit and be, alive and happy in our existence and not interferring with

Essay (continued next page )
VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

Essay (continued from previous page )
the existence of others. That sounds like my definition of sensitivity, a
quality of maturity. Oh well, society has a lot of maturing, a lot of
growing up, to do. I ask myself- do we want to?
Bio- Ian Whitney lives in Leelanau County
and is a student at the Interlachen Arts Academy.
He can be reached via &mail at either
WHITNEYlj@interlochen.k12.mi.us or Moktir@aol.com.

LAMBDA LEGAL DEFENSE (USE

LOGO)

Tom Stoddard Dies
Thomas Stoddard, a civil rights lawyer who helped lead the fight
for gays to serve openly in the military, has died at age 48. Stoddard
died Wednesday of AIDS, according to his companion, Walter
Rieman.
As executive director of the Lambda Legal Defense and
Education Fund from 1986 to 1992, Stoddard fought for equal rights
for gay men, lesbians and people with AIDS. He maintained his
public role after leaving the organization and after becoming ill, most
recently leading the unsuccessful lobbying to end the ban against
gays serving openly in the military. More militant activists considered
his approach too conciliatory.
Former Mayor Ed Koch praised Stoddard's authorship of a 1986
New York City law that protects gays against discrimination in
housing, employment and public accommodation . "He was an
extraordinary lawyer." said Koch.
An early proponent of gay marriage, Stoddard and colleagues
debated the issue in a road show to build support within the gay
community, said Peg Byron, Lambda's public education director.
Stoddard and Rieman, also a lawyer, exchanged wedding vows and
gold bands in 1993.

FRIENDS NORTH, INC.,

DISNEY UNDER ATTACK
Three denominations have been added to a growing list of
Christian groups calling on the Walt Disney Company to return to a
more pro-family approach in its entertainment offerings. The three
groups whose stances have received recent attention are the Church
of God (Cleveland, Tenn.), the Presbyterian Church in America and
the International Church of the Foursquare Gospel.
Last June, messengers to the annual meeting of the Southern Baptist
Convention passed a resolution calling on Baptists "to give prayerful and
serious consideration" to whether to attend Disney theme parks and
purchase Disney products. The resolution suggested a boycott of Disney
if it continues "this anti-Christian and anti-family trend."
The executive council of the Church of God adopted a resolution
strongly critical of Disney and calling on the church's worldwide
membership of 4 million members and 2,500 congregations to
consider a boycott. The church has 800,000 members and 6,500
congregations in the United States.
The Church of God's resolution listed several concerns,
including:
• publication of "Growing Up Gay" by Disney-owned Hyperion
Press. The book encourages teens to explore homosexuality,
the resolution said.
• release of the movie "Priest" by Disney-owned Miramax, an
action the resolution called "a disappointing departure from
Disney's image of producing wholesome family films."
• provision of health insurance to "same-sex companions of gay
and lesbian employees" of Disney.
• Disney's hosting of "Gay and Lesbian Day" at Disney World
in Orlando.
The Presbyterian Church in America passed a similar though
much shorter statement against Disney during its assembly meeting
in Coral Ridge, Fla. The one-sentence declaration adopted by the
meeting of 2,000 PCA delegates said: "We abhor what Disney and
other corporations do to promote the homosexual lifestyle."

P.O. Box 562,

TRAVERSE CITY,

MI 49685-0562

YES, I want to be a supporting member of the Friends North Organization
D Single : $15.00
D Couple: $25.00 (includes one-year newsletter subscription)
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and I would like to see this used for: D Newsletter D Where needed D Education Fund
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DI am New to the mailing list. D I am already on mailing list. D Note my new address. D Please remove me from your mailing list.
The F/N mailing list is confidential and our mailings come in an unmarked envelope.
NETWORKING 45' NORTH

-16-

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

BODIES IN MOTION
TEXACO
2000 Westchester Avenue
White Plains, NY 10650

January 27, 1997

To: Mr. Henry D. Messer, MD FACS
23248 Bonair, Dearborn Heights, Ml 48127
Dear Mr. Messer:
This is in response to your letter of December 26, 1996 to Peter
I. Bijur, which has been referred to me for handling. In the letter, you
refer to the absence of "any mention of gay and lesbian employees"
in Mr. Bijur's letter to shareholders of November 26.
In reply to your concerns, Texaco's policies dictate that
employment-related decisions are to be based solely on job related
factors (i.e. education, skills, prior work experience, performance,
etc.). This principle precludes discrimination of any kind towards
employees or candidates for employment.
As has been our company's practice, one's sexual orientation is
not a factor in determining employment and advancement
opportunities within Texaco. Furthermore, our company's policies
addressing discrimination are consistent with the constitutionally
guaranteed protection as defined in the Civil Rights Act of 1964. Our
policies are also consistent with generally accepted industry practices.
As we have publicly stated, Texaco is creating an Equality and
Tolerance Task Force whose mission will be to undertake a
comprehensive review of all our equal employment opportunity and
affirmative action policies. As the task force reviews suggestions for
how we might strengthen our employment-related policies, we will
consider language that will address the issue of sexual orientation in
our Equal Opportunity Policy Statement.
Texaco recognizes the rights of all individuals to work in an
environment free of discrimination, and is committed to a corporate
culture fully supportive of opportunity and fairness for every employee.
Again, thank you for taking the time to share your concerns with us.
Sincerely,
s/ Richard F. Brenner
President, Human Resources Division

Comment by Henry Messer: This letter in effect soys that TEXACO will do
nothing about gays and lesbians. They hide in the usual rhetoric about the
"Civil Rights Act of 1964" which soys nothing about sexual orientation.

Bay

Business
•
Services
Inc.

© 1997 by the Archaeological Institute of America
For additional information or photos, see:
http://www.orchoeology.org/9701 /obstrocts/indio html

NEW AIDS CASES STABILIZING IN
STUDY

EU -

BRUSSELS (Reuter) - The number of new cases of AIDS in the
European Union is stabilizing, figures released in late January show,
but Spain, Italy and Portugal are still recording increases.
The European Commission said Wednesday that 17,778 new
cases of Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome were diagnosed in
the 15-nation bloc in the first nine months of last year compared to
1995's total of 22,383.
The Commission said intravenous drug use was responsible for
the greatest number of new cases, accounting for just under half. Male
homosexuals or bisexuals accounted for 28 percent of new infections
while 19 percent was by heterosexual contact.
The Commission said also that an increasing number of women
were being infected with AIDS - 20 percent in 1995 compared to
just 12 percent in 1986. Most of the women infected were
intravenous drug users, the report said although some 32 percent had
been infected through sex with drug-using partners.
The report added that Spain, Portugal and Italy were still showing
increases in AIDS infections and this was attributed chiefly to drug use.

d

Office: (616) 941-5748

rr:::::J

Cross Country Ski

LJF~RBUSH CORNER, INC.
• Over 35 km of trails, machine set for both skating and striding from,
beginner to expert.
• Just l /.4 mile east of 1-75 at the Lewiston/Frederic exit (264)
• Performance ski shop, rentals and instruction
• Bunkhouse and two warming areas
• Weekend food service
• One kilometer night ski trail
P.O. Box 327
Dave Forbush
4971 County Road 612
(51 7) 348-5989
Frederic, Michigan 49733

ANDREW L. MITCHELL

Accounting & Tax Service
810-B South Garfield Ave• Traverse City, Ml 49686
NETWORKING 4S'NORTH

One of the world's richest sources of information about the
performing arts in prehistoric times is the painted decoration on the
walls of caves in central India. Stick figures wearing elaborate, spikey
headdresses sway to music, while others dance choreographed steps.
Harpists with erect phalli play for dancers, some of whom are engaging
in homosexual acts. Boys and girls jump about in ecstatic dance, then
sit on beds entwined in each other's arms.
Rock art showing dance and musicianship is abundant in the
state of Madhya Pradesh, particularly in the Vindhya Hills to the north
of the Narmada River, and in the Mahadeo Hills to the south. Here,
early artists created some of the most vivid and dramatic pictures of
people in motion.

-17-

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/APRIL 1997

Human Rights Campaign, from the grassroots up." Red Wing was
instrumental in the defeat of Oregon's anti-gay ballot measure in
1992. As a resu It of her work, The Advocate named her its 1992
Woman of the Year. Simultaneously, her adversaries on the right
proclaimed Red Wing "the most dangerous woman in Oregon."

HRC LAUNCHES FORUM ON AOL
In the Quest to deliver our message as widely as possible, the
Human Rights Campaign has launched its own forum on America
Online, which currently reaches 7 million subscribers.
The HRC Forum is housed in AOL's Politics Channel and sits
along-side The White House Forum, The Capitol Connection,
Congressional
Quarterly,
The
McLaughlin Group, the ACLU and HUMAN
other political forums.
RIGHTS
The HRC Forum provides access
to our award-winning Online Action CAMPAIGN
Center, which enables users to
research issues and send messages to Congress; an ARC News and
Issues area, a Membership and Marketplace mall, a Coming Out
space, HRC Message Boards and an HRC Caucus Room. HRC will
host evening chats on a variety of lesbian and gay and AIDS issues.
The Caucus Room programming schedule is posted on line.
AOL members can access the HRC Forum using < Keyword :
HRC> or from the link in the Politics Channel.

HRC Hires Red Wing to Strengthen Field
Operation
The Human Rights Campaign starts the new year with some new
faces, and some familiar faces in new places. Longtime activist
Donna Red Wing joins HRC as national field director, Winnie
Stachelberg has been promoted to the new position of legislative
director, and Kevin Layton has been named director of the political
action committee and HRC's legislative counsel. Layton will work
closely with Chai Feldblum, HRC's outside counsel.
These changes grew out of the departure of Daniel Zingale,
HRC's political director, to become executive director of AIDS Action
Council. "We were very sorry to see Daniel leave, but he will be a
brilliant asset to AIDS Action," says HRC Executive Director Elizabeth
Birch.
Red Wing, meanwhile, comes to HRC after three years with the
Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation, where she helped
create and manage its training programs in dealing with media,
violence against gay men and lesbians and organizing against antigay initiatives. "We are thrilled to add Donna Red Wing's talent and
vast experience to the staff of the Human Rights Campaign, " Birch
says. "Her abilities as an organizer, public speaker and committed
activist will continue the process of building our movement, and the

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Tipping the Balance of Power
HRC's first foray into state politics proved to be a success as we
helped wrest the California Assembly from the hands of extremists.
The Assembly, which was split 41-39 Republican to Democrat before
Election Day, now promises to be a place where lesbians, gay men
and fair-minded Californians are safer from anti-gay legislative
attacks because of the shift to 43 Democrats and 37 Republicans .
HRC's California Project turned out thousands of volunteers
throughout the state to staff phone banks, participate in literature
drops and get people out to vote on Election Day. Openly gay
Assemblywomen Carole Migden of San Francisco and Sheila Kuehl
of Santa Monica praised HRC for its efforts. "HRC's California Project
played a pivotal role in reclaiming the California state Assembly from
the extremist factions of the Republican Party," Migden said.
"We decided that since so much anti-gay federal legislation starts
at the state level, that we could try a little preventative medicine,"
said Kevin Layton, HRC's PAC director and legislative counsel. "Plus,
the extremists held a very slim majority in California."
Along with HRC's efforts to turn around the Assembly, HRC was
also involved in many federal races in California. Senior Policy
Advocate Julio Abreu worked with HRC members in the Santa
Barbara area to elect fair-minded candidate Walter Capps, who
defeated extremist Rep. Andrea Seastrand. HRC's political action
committee supported many candidates forfederal office in California
including Loretta Sanchez, who defeated the most vocal anti-gay
member of the House, Bob Dornan, and worked to re-elect Rep . Tom
Campbell, a Republican who earned 89 percent on HRC's scorecard.

CHRYSLER PROTESTS BRING RESULT
-A report from Ron Woods

Due to the persistent efforts of the "Campaign For Equal Rights At
Chrysler", Chrysler has added the words "sexual orientation" to the
Corporate "Standards of Conduct". This most recent revision of the
"Standards of Conduct" is dated January, 1997.
Also Chrysler has stated in a letter to fellow activist David F. Reckinger
dated February 20, l 997 that diversity training is currently being evaluated
and that such training would begin "as soon as possible". These steps and
the "memo" from Chrysler CEO dated November 11, 1996, which for the
first time in known history Chrysler uttered the words "sexual orientation",
are positive steps in the right direction.
However, we maintain a healthy skepticism in light of the fact that all
of this movement has only occurred during times of tremendous work,
determination, perseverance and media attention exerted by the
"Campaign For Equal Rights At Chrysler''. Years of letter writing campaigns
and repeated requests produced no movement whatsoever, all progress
has been achieved only when overwhelming pressure has been exerted.
For this reason the sincerity and depth of the commitment to equal rights
must be drawn into question.

Chrysler (continued next page)

NETWORKING 45°NORTH

-18-

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

Chrysler (continued from previous page)
Therefore we would appreciate everyone please doing all they can
to continue to exert pressure by letter writing, phone calls and protests/
pickets and media attention to the work that needs to be completed. We
still must have:
1) A "memorandum of understanding" between Chrysler and the
United Auto Workers (UAW)
2) Effective and substantial "Diversity Training" where we as
employees have input.

·GLAAD NEWS

We would like to thank everyone who has done anything to bring
these changes about. Keep up the good work.
Sincerely, Ron G. Woods,Chairperson, Campaign For Equal Rights At
Chrysler: MichRook@aol.com - 810-545-7699

DOMESTIC PARTNERS LAW SHOWING
UP IN CONTRACTS
Some S.F. vendors quietly signing deals
The first contracts that bring companies into compliance with San
Francisco's ground breaking domestic partners law are quietly being
approved, even as fights with United Airlines and the Catholic church grab
the headlines.
Thousands of companies are trying to figure out how to comply with
the city's unique law that, starting in June, will require anyone doing
business with the city to offer the same benefits to married and unmarried
couples, including registered gay or lesbian couples. Some are already
doing it by offering the benefits.
The Pier 23 Cafe's new long-term lease with the Port Commission has
been approved, as has the Crystal Springs Golf Course operator's new
contract with the Public Utilities Commission. Glide Memorial Church said
it is creating domestic partners benefits. And in the proposed settlement of
a dispute between the city and Tele-Communications Inc., San Francisco's
cable franchisee, domestic partner benefits was not a contentious issue
because TCI already offers such benefits across the country.
"The law is written to give companies flexibility," said Cynthia
Goldstein of the San Francisco Human Rights Commission. "In the first year
or two, we don't expect all contracts to have everything in place, but we
want to see movement toward putting them in place."
It's that position that has created controversy with United, the world's
largest airline, and with the Roman Catholic archdiocese, which has asked
for an exemption for Catholic Charities.

B

l~~I

UNITED AIRLINES TO OFFER BENEFITS
TO PARTNERS
SAN FRANCISCO (AP)-United Airlines has two years to extend
health and other benefits to its workers' same-sex partners, under an
agreement reached with city leaders.
The accord, which the Board of Supervisors unanimously
approved Monday, allows United's $90 million expansion at San
Francisco International Airport.
In June, the city will begin requiring all the companies with
which it does business to offer spousal benefits to their workers
unmarried partners.
The city had said it would not approve the airline's $13.4
million, 25-year lease until it promised to comply with the new law.
Under the agreement, United must develop a spousal benefits
program in the lease's first 20 months.
"San Francisco has long been a leader in the fight for human civil
rights and once again we are setting the standard," said Supervisor
Leslie Katz, who is gay.

ERNIE DAWSON
OWNER

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NETWORKING 45' NORTH

'Ellen' nominated for GLAAD Award
ABC sitcom "Ellen," which may be preparing to bring its title
character out of the closet, is among the nominees for the eighth
annual GLAAD Media Awards, presented by the Gay & Lesbian
Alliance Against Defamation. The awards will be presented at the
media watchdog group's fund- raising banquets next month in Los
Angeles, Washington and New York.
The other TV comedy nominees announced are "Friends, ""Spin
City," "Mad About You" and "The Larry Sanders Show." The drama
series contenders are "Bedtime," "Chicago Hope" and "Relativity."
Nominees for outstanding wide-release movie are "The
Birdcage," "Bound," Flirting With Disaster," "Get on the Bus" and
"Set It Off."
The top limited-release movies are "Antonia's Line," "Beautiful
Thing," "Costa Brava," "French Twist," "It's My Party" and
"Stonewall ."
The daytime drama series nominees are "All My Children,"
"General Hospital," "One Life to Live" and "The City."
The GLAAD Awards recognize "balanced and accurate
representations" of homosexuals and issues that affect them. The wide
range of categories includes TV and newspaper journalism, advertising
campaigns, music, interactive media and even comic books.

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Flowers
-19-

•

Gifts

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.

aW'

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

IE

0

u

STATE AND NATIONAL HOTLINES

cc IE
LOCAL SPIRITUAL:

Rev. Geraldine Colvin & Rev. David Florence
Unity Church, 3600 Five Mile, Traverse City .. . .... . .. 616-932-9587
Rev. Emmy Lou Belcher
Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of Grand Traverse
6726 Center Rd., Traverse City-Home: 938-9078 . .. Office: 947-3117
Rev. Nancy Hayward, Circle of the Sacred Earth . .. . . ... . 616-223-7999

Department of Justice Hotline (for reporting
Hate Crimes against gays and lesbians) . . ......... . 800-347-HATE
Michigan Wellness Networks ... . ... ... ... . ... . .. . ... 800-872-AIDS
Gay/Lesbian National Youth Hotline .... .. ..... .. . . .. . 800-347-TEEN

STATEWIDE SERVICES
SOCIAL I POLITICAL / MEDIA

LOCAL COUNSELING:
Third Level Crisis Intervention, ....... . .... . . . ..... . . . 616-922-4800
1022 E. Front St., TC, Ml 49686 ..... .... .. . .. . . and 800-442-7315
Women's Resource Center . . ... . .. .. . . . .. .. .. .. .. . . . 616-941-121 O
Rodger Landvoy, PHO ..... . . . . ... .. .. .. .. . .. . . . .. . 616-929-1711
Susan Breuer PHO (Frankfort/ Traverse City) ... . . ...... 616-352-4261
Margo Million, ACSW .. ............. .. . . . . .. .. .. ... 616-947-0511
David Blisk (Maple City) ..... . ...... . .. ... ..... . . . . . 616-228-5105
Joanna T. Lauber, MA, OTR, CHt ....... . . . .. . .... . ... 616-947-8842
Barbara Jones Smith, PHO . . ... .. . . . ............. . . . 616-947-1444
Elizabeth Most, MSW, ACSW (Petoskey) . . . .... . .... . . . 616-439-0656
William D. Gould, MA (Gladwin) . . . .. ..... . ....... .. . . 517-426-2351
David Rushlow, ACSW, Munson Medical Center ..... . ... 616-935-6385
Bay Area Counseling (Petoskey/Harbor Springs)
Margalo Bley, MSW, ACSW ....... .. ... . . . . . . ... .. 616-348-3616
Daniel C. Doran, PHO, CSW . .. . . . . ................. 906-635-9263
Lois Martindale, Ph.D., Benzonia . .. . ..... .. .. .. . . .... 616-882-5888 '
CDRS (a free substance abuse referral agency)
808-A S. Garfield, Traverse City .... . .... . 929-1315 or 800-686-0749

The Network: Lesbian and Gay Community Network of W. Michigan
909 Cherry St. S.E., Grand Rapids, Ml 49506 ..... . .. . 616-458:3511
Lavender Morning
P.O. Box 50729, Kalamazoo, Ml 49005 .. .. . ..... . ... 616-685-6061
Kalamazoo Resource Center
P.O. Box 1532, Kalamazoo, Ml 49005 . .. . . .. ...... .. 616-345-7878
Affirmations Lesbian/Gay Community Center
Suite 110, 195 W. Nine Mile Rd.
Ferndale, Ml 48220 .... .... .. .. .. . .. . . ... . ... . .. . 810-398-7105
http://www.webspace.com/-tcc/affirmations/index.htme
Lansing Association of Human Rights
P.O. Box 18062, Lansing, Ml 48826 .. .. . . .. .. ...... . 517-332-3200
e-mail . ... .. . . ..... . .. . . .. .. . . .. . .. .. . . .. lahr@macatawa.org
Lesbian Connection
P.O. Box 811, East Lansing, Ml 48826 .... . . .... . . . .. 517-371-5257
Triangle Foundation (Lesbian/Gay Foundation of Michigan)
19641 W. Seven Mile Rd., Detroit 48219 . . .. .. . .. . . .. 313-537-3323
. .. .. .... ... . . . ..... .. .. ........ .. .. .... . Fax: 313-537-3379
email . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . trijeffm@aol.com
Between The Lines (newspaper/monthly) ...... .. ... .. . . 810-615-7003
33528 Eight Mile, Ste. 185A3, Livonia, Ml 48152 . .. FAX 810-615-7018
e-mail . . .... ... . . . . . .. .. .... . .. . .. ... .. .. pridepblis@aol.com
The Third Coast (magazine/monthly) .. .. . .. . . . .... . . .. 616-451-4903
1322 Hurd, SE, Grand Rapids 49506 . . ... . ...... FAX 616-451 -0915
e-mail ... . . .. . .. ......... . .. . . .. .. .. . . . . lllrdCoasst@aol.com

LOCAL SERVICE / SOCIAL I POLITICAL

NATIONAL SERVICE / SOCIAL I POLITICAL
P-FLAG: Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays
101214th St. NW, Ste. 700, Washington, DC 20005 ... . 202-638-4200
GLAAD: Gay/Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation
BO Varick St., #3E, New York, NY 10013 . . . .. .... .. . . 212-807-1700
....... . .. . .. . ...... . .. ... .... . ... .. ..... Fax: 212-807-1806
email ... . . . .. ..... . . ...... . ..... . ....... . . glaadnatl@aol.com
National Gay and Lesbian Task Force ... . . . .... ..... . . 202-332-6483
2320 17th St., NW, Washington, DC 20009 .. . .. .. Fax: 202-332-0207
Lambda Legal Defense and Education Fund ..... . . 212-809-8585 x 205
120Wall St., NY, NY 10005 . . .. . . ..... . . .. . .. . Fax: 212-890-0055
ACLU Lesbian/Gay Rights Project
1370 Mission St., San Francisco, CA 94130 . . . ....... 415-621-0674
HRC: Human Rights Campaign (National Coming Out Day)
101214th St. NS #607, Washington, DC 20005 . .. .... 202-628-4160
.... . .. . .. . . .. ... ......... .. . ... .... .. ... Fax: 202-347-5323
e-mail ....... . ... .. .. .. .. . . ...... .. . .. , .. .. www@hrcusa.org
Gay and Lesbian Victory Fund, Political Action Committee
101214th St. NW #707, Washington, DC 20005 . .. . ... 202-842-7679

NElWORKING 45 °NORTH

JR

Friends North (information line) .............. . .. . .. . . 616-946-1804
Common Voices - F/N Rap Group ... .. .... . . . . . .. .... Ed - 947-4697
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Tom - 275-6127
Windfire Gay & Lesbian Youth Support GroupCall Third Level for location & time ... . ......... . .. .. 616-922-4800
or ... .. . .. . .... . . ....... .. . . . . ... .. .. .. .. . .. .. 800-442-7315
Side Traxx Nite Club, 520 Franklin St. off of 8th St. . . .. . . . 616-935-1666
Traverse City Human Rights Commission, 400 Boardman . 616-922-4700
Gay Alcoholics Anonymous,
Grace Church, Washington at Boardman, TC . . . . John 616-922-0746
P-FLAG, Traverse City, POB 1705, Acme, Ml 49610 . Cindy 616-271 -5045
GLSTN (Gay/Lesbian/Straight Teachers Network)
PO Box 9, Traverse, Ml 49685 . . .. . . .... .. . .... .... 616-943-8800
NOW (National Organization for Women) Gail Trill .. . .. .. 616-938-1333

LOCAL HIV/ AIDS HEALTH COUNSELING:
HIV/AIDS Wellness Networks, GTA, Inc., ......... .. .... 616-947-1110
P.O. Box 1632, Traverse City, Ml 49685 . . ... ... . .. 1-800-494-1160
Business Office .... ........ . . . . . .. ... ......... .. 616-933-0279
HIV/AIDS Wellness Networks - HIV Support Group and
Family and Significant Other Support Group . . .. . . . ... 616-947-1110
Thomas Judd Care Center, 1211 W Front St., Traverse City,
Mary Dillinger, RN, Clinical Nurse Specialist ....... ... 616-935-8140
David Rushlow, ACSW Social Worker ..... .. . . . . . ... 616-935-6385
H.A.N.D.S. (HIV/AIDS Support: Petoskey) .. .. .. . . .. . . 1-800-248-6777
Community Health Clinic ...... ..... . . . ... .... . .. .. . . 616-929-4448
(anonymous counseling/testing; same-day results no fee)
Northern Michigan Planned Parenthood . .... . . . ........ 616-929-1844
(anonymous counseling & testing)
Grand Traverse County Health Department . . . .. .... .. . . 616-922-4831
(anonymous HIV Testing Center)
Emmet County Health Department (Petoskey) . . . . . . . ... . 616-347-6014
Also call the District Health Department in your area
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VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997



THE NEWSLETTER OF FRIENDS NORTH, INC.,

N

E

T

an association of lesbians,

w

0

nd their friends.

R

G

Property of

HERLAND LIBRARY
VOLUME

11

•

ISSUE

2

•

MARCH

•

APRIL

•

1997

transgender population is likely to be our largest minority group.
Learning tolerance and respect for diversity can help free our
community of prejudice and bigotry, and help reduce violence. Our
goal is to create northern Michigan communities where all individuals
are valued and respected.
PFLAG, GLSTN, Friends North and THIRDlevel corporations
The Help and Information Line telephone number in Traverse City:
announce a new, toll-free Help and Information Line.
61 6 / 946- 1804
by M'Lynn Hartwell If outside of Traverse City you may call: 800 / 579-8769
Traverse City-PFLAG, GLSTN, Friends North and THIRDlevel Information About Organizations:
corporations announce a new Help and Information Line to address
Friends North, Inc. is a regional social organization with over 600
individual and family concerns about same-gender affectional members. Friends North offers numerous events and activities
orientation through information, counseling and intervention. Trained throughout the year for individuals who are lesbians, gay men, or
THIRDlevel crisis staff will respond immediately to help individuals
bisexual.
and families cope with the difficulties they encounter as the result of
GLSTN: Gay Lesbian Straight Teachers Network, strives to assure
bias in our schools, family, church and community.
that each member of every school community is valued and respected,
The U.S. Department of Justice reported that "The most frequent regardless of sexual orientation. Through community organizing, public
victims of hate violence today are blacks, Hispanics, Southeast Asians,
Help Line (continued page 3)
Jews, and gays and lesbians. Homosexuals are probably the most
frequent victims."
The National Gay and Lesbian Task Force surveyed 2,000 gays
and lesbians and found that over 90% had experienced some form of
victimization on account of their perceived or actual sexual orientation
and one-in-five gay males and one-in-ten lesbians said that they had
been "punched, hit, kicked, or beaten." Ninety-seven percent of highHIGH TEA
school kids report regularly hearing some homophobic remark; 28
Traverse City Opera House - Sunday, April 27, 1997
percent of gay and lesbian students dropped out of school.

NORTHERN MICHIGAN HELP AND
INFORMATION LINE INSTALLED

FRIENDS NORTH UPCOMING EVENTS

Researchers have found that homosexual youth are at a greater risk
to experience isolation, peer and family rejection, harassment and
violence. They expend considerable energy hiding their "secret" from
friends and family, out of fear of rejection - rejection that often results
in being thrown out of the home and onto the streets. The threat of
physical and psychological damage to the developing gay teen is great,
and our Help and Information Line may be of great value to all
members of the family as they seek understanding. The Help and
Information Line will also assist people of all ages with lesbian or gay
parents, or other family. It is estimated that as many as fourteen million
children come from households with lesbian or gay parents.
Given the generally accepted statistics regarding the proportion of
gays in society, every city, town and rural community in America is
likely to have a significant number of lesbian and gay students,
teachers, parents and other people involved in every area of their
community. In fact, in northern Michigan the lesbian, gay, bisexual and

GAY PROM
May, 1997 - (Date and Location to be announced)

TRAVERSE CITY PRIDE EVENT
June 29, 1997

FRIENDS NORTH BIKE TOUR
August 8-10

AUTUMN HIKE
(Exact Date/Location to be announced)

FALL FILM FESTIVAL
(Exact Date/Location to be announced)

GAY HISTORY AND EDUCATION DAY - OCTOBER, 1997
(Exact Date/Location to be announced)

THANKSGMNG POTLUCK - NOVEMBER, 1997
(Exact Date/Location to be announced)

Richard Tuxbury

Friends North, Inc., P.O. Box 562, Traverse City, MI 49685-0562 (616)
946-1804 (This is a general information line to receive FIN
information.)
FRIENDS NORTH is an organization of lesbians, gay men, bi-sexuals and
their friends from northwestern lower Michigan. Located in Traverse
City, we provide social activities, a newsletter, phone line, workshops,
and a scholarship fund for financial assistance.
THE BOARD OF DIRECTORS of FRIENDS NORTH is composed of nine
women and men elected each December. Regular board meetings are
held at Grace Episcopal Church at the Corner of Washington &
Boardman the first Tuesday of every month at 6:30 p.m. Everyone is
welcome to attend.
Brenda Bartz - 616-946-2708/bbartzstar@aoLcom
Victor Dinsmore, Secretary- 616-459-5759/itsyrigloo@aoLcom
M'Lynn Hartwell - 616-943-8800/les n more@aol.com
Jim Ingleson - 616-922-0925
Carol Lambertson, Pres. - 616-27 5-7102/tclambo@gtii.com
Tom Kincaid-VP - 616-947-4647
Ben Maddy- 616-271-3926/coolj707@aol.com
Julie Parker - 616-276-9330
Sue Schwartz, Treas. - 616-946-3032/tcfriend@aoLcom
NEWSLETTER COMMITTEE: Publication of Networking 45° North.
Editor: Richard Tuxbury: 271-3042
or e-mail: tux0 0 1@ aol. com
Publishing & Layout: Richard Curtis: 616-929-9605
or e-mail: rlc@traverse.com
Advertising: Ric Nelson: 616-933-7116
Mailing List: John Evans: 922-0746
Networking 45° North is the newsletter of Friends North, Inc. Viewpoints
expressed do not necessarily represent those of the board or general
membership.
CLASSIFIED ADVERTISING and notices are run without charge. Please
submit in writing or by calling the editor (and leave ad on machine 2713042 or by email.)
DISPLAY ADVERTISING in Networking 45° North is available in Business
Card size - $25.00 per space per issue or an annual rate of $120.00 for
6 issues. Inserts and larger sized ads are .available. Please call
'advertising' for rates.
SPONSORING POLITICAL POSTCARDS: Cost for printing 2,800 postcards
for Networking 45° North is $100.00. To sponsor all or part of this, and
to give your input, call Richard 271-3042.
CONTRIBUTIONS to Networking are welcome. Letters, essays, features,
reflections, and original artwork should be sent "c/ o Editor" to above
address. (Networking will not accept material that is sexist,
discriminatory or sexually explicit. Contributors are responsible for
obtaining permission from those whose names they submit for
publication.)
DEADLINES: Issue #3, April 15. Issue#4June 15, Issue#5 August 15.
ADDRESS CHANGES: Please notify us in advance if a change is coming.
Call John Evans, 922-0746, or send changes to our address.
SUBSCRIPTIONS/MEMBERSHIPS: $15.00/ single; $25.00/couple. Please
send checks or money orders to: Friends North, P.O. Box 562, Traverse
City, MI 49685-0562.
DISTRIBUTION: Networking is published 6 times per year. Copies are sent
bulk-mail in a plain envelope to approximately 700 households.
Additional copies are available at select local establishments. Our
mailing list is not sold or traded with other organizations.

FROM THE EDITOR
Politically, our new year has gotten
off to a mildly disappointing start.
Many of us wished Bill back in the
White House for another term, and then,
he must have forgotten how much we supported him. He never once
used either the "g" or the "I" words in his State of the Union address.
However, when the Employment Non-Discrimination Act gets
reintroduced this year, Bill has publicly vowed to give it his wholehearted assistance.
On the other side of this presidential administration, Vice
President Gore has expressed an interest in educating himself about
gays and lesbians and recently asked gay leaders for advice on which
books to read. A few were suggested: Before Stonewall, Randy Shilts'
Conduct Unbecoming, and The Celluloid Closet.
Individual states have been busy building barriers to stop the
homosexual marriage menace that will soon invade the mainland
from Hawaii. To date, almost half the states have passed laws that
prohibit the recognition of same-sex marriage, despite the fact that
marriage has yet to be legalized in any state. Hawaii is still wrestling
with the issue, but same sex marriage should be recognized there
sometime in 1998.
Many members of Congress are busying themselves with at least
two unnecessary and self-aggrandizing amendments to our
Constitution. One protects the American flag from being desecrated,
and the other calls for a mandatory balanced federal budget. I worry
that our Constitution can be tampered with too easily if these move
forward . It is then just another step away from their proposing to
outlaw same-sex mariage via another amendment. .. or who knows
what!
Locally, I hope that at least a few people rose early enough to
watch the two-day Rita Melotti (TV 29) show that focused on samesex marriage. Thanks to Guy Molnar, Cindy Robb, Rev . Emenheiser
from Grace Episcopal, and Benjamin Maddy, the gay/lesbian
community had excellent representation and interpretation.
The second day of the show, our state representative, Michelle
McManus, was on the speaker phone during the half hour program .
She defended her support of Michigan's banning same-sex marriage,
and attempted to rationalize how her stand against gay marriage was
also a stand for equal rights for everyone.
Without a hint of sarcasm, McManus proclaimed, "I feel that
Michigan's banning gay marriage is not discriminatory towards gay
men, because heterosexual men are also not allowed to marry." I have
paraphrased, as it was done in typical 'Michelle-speak.' It is opinions
such as this that have earned her a seat on Engler's Michigan's Civil
Rights Commission . Now she has been officially charged to do for all
other minority groups what she has done for gays and lesbians.
We are still looking for contributions, so please consider
submitting your essay or thoughts for our upcoming issues this year. If
you have any questions, please call me. Our newsletter will be much
better with YOU in it!

~

printed on recycled paper
NE1WORKING 45°NORTH

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VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

Help Line (continued from page 1)

Carol Lambertson

advocacy and in-school programming, we are working to end
homophobia and heterosexism in this generation through educating
today's students. We welcome as members any and all individuals,
regardless of sexual orientation or occupation, who are committed to
seeing this philosophy realized.
PFLAG: Parents, Families, and Friends of Lesbians and Gays
promote the health and well-being of gay, lesbian, bisexual,
transgendered persons, their families and friends through
• Support to cope within an adverse society.
• Education to enlighten an ill-informed public, and
• Advocacy to end discrimination and to secure equal civil rights.
THIRDlevel: Provides 24 hour crisis intervention, information and
referral services; youth and family services; short term counseling; and
support groups such as Windfire for lesbian and gay youth.

FROM THE PRESIDENT
I have had many people talk to me about "what
it used to be like" in the Grand Traverse area with
respect to the gay community. Gatherings used to
happen only within the safety of people's homes.
Then some folks got brave and organized dances, first hanging brown
paper on all the windows of the rented building for protection from the
public eye. And who can forget those dark and smokey Den dances?
However, times have changed in our area, albeit slowly. The Den
dances have disappeared, but Traverse City has a gay bar that has
survived. We have a monthly lesbian coffeehouse that has existed for
over three years. There is an expansive and labeled Gay/Lesbian section
in our newest bookstore. Last year the Bay Theater set aside a Sunday
afternoon for a movie to benefit Friends North, and gay issues even get
mentioned in the local press occasionally; though the issues are not
always positive - at least we're not ignored.
In fact, I took a few minutes to quickly list as many of the gay or
gay-friendly people, places and things I could think of, and came up with
quite a slate: Networking 45 Degrees North - our excellent newsletter;
Out 'n About Lesbian Coffeehouse; Weekly Gay M Meetings; The Rap
Group - monthly gay discussion group; The Bookie Joint; The Petoskey
Thursday night dinner group (weekly); PFLAG monthly meetings;
GLSTN meetings; Lesbian Adventures - bi-monthly gatherings; Monthly
Friends North Board Meetings; Wellness Network; Monthly Out 'n
About Coffeehouse Planning Meetings; Gay Book Discussion Group at
Border's Book Store - Monthly; Gay Pride Celebration Planning
Meetings; Newsletter Stuffing Party.
(NOTE: Details regarding most of the above can be found
elsewhere within this newsletter)
This is by no means an all-inclusive list, but I think you get the idea
that if you are looking to either get involved or just meet other likeminded people, you don't have to know the secret handshake. There
are plenty of opportunities.
Some of the above mentioned groups or activities are part of Friends
North and some are not. However, we attempt to cooperate with one
another when planning our various events. Therefore, on January 5th,
1997 the Friends North Board met with representatives from some of
the above groups in a "retreat" setting to discuss common issues and
concerns. The Board asked for input and entertained requests and ideas.
During the latter half of the day, with all guests having departed, the
Board then sketched out the yearly event calendar.
Since we are awaiting confirmation of several locations and dates,
information is incomplete at this time. However, we have placed the
Calendar of Events in this issue in case you are inspired with ideas or
suggestions. We welcome your input and still have lots of planning time
for most of the events - just call the help line, leave your name and
number, and we will call you back.
We will be updating the calendar with each newsletter issue.

COMMON VOICES
Ed Richardson
Exciting things are happening in the Friends North Rap Group.
Please delete "Rap Group" from you brain data base and replace with
our brand new name - "Common Voices." I would like to thank
Alan Williams for suggesting this more reflective name. Alan has also
volunteered to do promotion for our group that welcomes ALL gays
and lesbians-regardless of age-to our monthly gatherings held in
the basement lounge at Grace Episcopal Church, 349 Washington
St. at 7:30 pm on the second Wednesday .
As always, Common Voices offers a safe haven and supportive
atmosphere. Often, there are selected topics and related videos but
there is always time to consider personal problems. Common Voices
has no difficulty being a sounding board. If you are new to our local
gay/lesbian community, Common Voices wants to welcome you! If
you have not been to a Common Voices gathering for some time,
please come back. You are missed! If you know of someone who
needs Common Voices, please encourage them to come. Our
welcome mat is always out- don't knock, just walk-in!
Common Voices will also be gathering for dinner at a local
selected restaurant on the first Wi;dnesday of each month at 7:00 pm.
We want you to join us! Please contact myself (Ed) at 947-4697 or
Tom at 275-6127 for the restaurant choice of the month (or for any
questions about Common Voices.) (There was discussion at the
January Common Voices gathering that the monthly restaurant outing
be entitled "Common Nibbles" - what do you think???

•

..

FRIENDS NORTH BIKE TOUR, AUGUST 8-10

(616) 941-8868

Join us for a spectacular weekend of biking and
socializing in beautiful Leelanau County. Call
Friends North for an information packet."
NE1WORKING 4S'NORTH

'Fax (616) 941-9063
•'Hrs 9am-7ym 'Dai(y • Out

ef town yfione 800-876-8868

1081 S. 'ltiryort 'Road West, 'Traverse City, 'M'l 49686 (Cofonia( Square)

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VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

Out,n

Out 'n About Lesbian Coffeehouse is managed by an informal
gathering of lesbians who are dubbed the "Steering Committee." This
Committee meets for a few hours on the Monday prior to the 3rd
Saturday coffeehouse for planning of each month's event. The
Committee is always seeking input from you, the lesbian community,
about wbat or who Out 'n About should feature in upcoming months.
Please join the Steering Committee so that your ideas can be heard
and so that you can make a positive impact on your own community.
Without your input and assistance the Coffeehouse will not succeed.

+About
A Lesbian Coffeehouse
Unity Church - 3600 Five Mile Road - Traverse City
Call 946-2708 for more information
The Out 'n About
Lesbian Coffeehouse is very
pleased to present to our
lesbian
community
the
passionate,
percussive
rhythms and powerful vocals
of Irene Farrera. Her music is
inspired by the rich culture of
the
South
American
continent, where she was
born
and
raised
in
Venezuela. She has been
Irene Farrera
performing professionally for
more than 15 years. Irene's repertoire includes the contemporary
sounds of Brazil and the Caribbean. She composes beautiful songs
with lyrics in Spanish, English, and Portuguese. She also interprets
songs by well-known Latin American composers. Her work reflects
the essence of the Latin spirit, offering fierce passion, romantic
tenderness, and diverse experience.
Irene Farrera will be on the Coffeehouse stage on Saturday,
March 15. The Coffeehouse is open from 7:00 p.m . until 11 p.m.
Please show your support of a wonderful performer and the Out 'n
, About Lesbian Coffeehouse with your attendance.
In April, the Out 'n About Lesbian Coffee.house is planning a
" Favorite Card and Board Games" evening. Please bring your decks
of unmarked cards for a spur-of-the-moment friendly Euchre match
or a challenging Gin rummy tournament. Also bring any of the
myriad varieties of board games (i.e., Monopoly, Clue, Shoots and
Ladders, Yahtzee, (Lesbian-modified Mystery Date, Trivial Pursuit,
Pictionary, etc.) to the Coffeehouse. It is all happening on Saturday,
April 19, from 7 p.m. until 11 p.m. Prizes awarded to the individual
who is selected by the entire group as the lesbian who best fit the
category, "Plays well with others. "

Out n' About Lesbian Coffeehouse is held on the third Saturday
of each month except August and December. The Coffeehouse
comes alive between 7:00 and 11 :00 pm at the Unity Church,
3600 Five Mile Road, Traverse City. Smoke-free and Chem-free
with a cover donation of $3-5 ($5-$10 if we have entertainment).
Coffee, tea and snacks are free; soft drinks are available.

For more information, or to have your name placed on the Out 'n
About Lesbian Coffeehouse mailing list, call Brenda at946-2708leave message.

BOARD NOTES:
In an attempt to maintain good communication among the Friends
North Board of Directors, the membership and the readers of this
newsletter, we are adding this section to provide you with a synopsis of
what really happens at our board meetings.
We welcome feedback in the form of phone calls, letters to the editor
and attendance at the board meetings. Please let us know if this
information is helpful to you!
On January 7th the Board met for it's first monthly meeting of 1997.
The major points of business for that meeting included:
• Review of our financial report - an excellent job was done by
incoming treasurer, Sue Schwartz. It is summarized below:

•

BANKERS LIFE AND CASUAL IT COMPANY

=
$ 3290.19
Opening Balance as of 12/1/96
Total Revenue
=
$ 285.00
Total Expenses
$ 562 .12
Closing Balance asof 12/31 /96
$ 3013 .07
There was discussion about the ensuing toll-free telephone number
which will be answered for Friends North, PFLAG and GLSTN at
Thirdlevel Crisis Intervention. The Thirdlevel staff will be 'inserviced'
by representatives of Friends North, PFLAG and GLSTN. A contract
will need to be signed, and then service can begin. Anticipated date
is February 10, 1997. (See related article in this issue).

A Trusted Name In Insurance
For Over 100 Years

•

Long Term Care • Medicare Supplement
Income Replacement • Home Health Care
Annuity • Health • Life

We appointed the newsletter editor and publisher. This has to be
done at the beginning of each year and thankfully the same people
- Dick Tuxbury and Richard Curtis - accepted these positions.

•

A policy/procedure was approved, along with an application form
for the Friends North Scholarship fund (formerly known as the
Community Needs Fund). These items are available from our
treasurer, Sue Schwartz, or any board member. A copy is located
elsewhere in this newsletter.

814 S. Garfield Ave. Suite C
Traverse City, MI 49684
(616) 947-4390
S-5205
NITWORKING 45'NORTH

LINDA L. WIKLE
Agent

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VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

•

An introductory letter was approved which will be sent to all
people requesting information about Friends North along with the
most current copy of the newsletter. In the past there was no
consistency as to how this was done.

•

Our bylaws call for the appointment of an Executive Committee
consisting of the President, Vice President and one other board
member. Victor Dinsmoore was appointed by the Board as this
third member.

•

Plans were finalized for mailing renewal letters to members with
lapsed renewal dates. Approximately 300 renewal requests will be
mailed. [Note: at this writing approximately 75 renewals have been
received-thank you!!]. We also approved a special mailing of a
flyer reminding folks of the Winter Sports Party on Feb. 23.

•

have been received so far. There was lengthy discussion about
what to do with names on the list of people who don't respond.
Some board members feel that if people haven't renewed their
membership then they should not receive a copy of the newsletter,
since it costs about $1 per issue. Others feel that everyone should
stay on the mailing list regardless of whether or not they have paid
a membership. We are carrying names from as far back as 1993.
[The renewal date is on the mailing label right after the name].
Further discussion was tabled for future meetings to include the
editor and publisher.

There was general discussion about a request made to the board
during the Board Retreat from a young person who is interested in
establishing a Safe Schools program and a gay/straight alliance in
the high school. The request was for money to assist with mailings,
etc. Since no official bus_iness may be conducted at the Board
Retreat, the item was placed on the agenda for our first meeting.
Our by-laws state that to become a member of Friends North a
person must be 18 years of age or older. Board consensus was that
in order to provide financial assistance to someone, that someone
must be a Friends North member. One board member offered to
have a discussion with our attorney, Madeline Thomas, regarding
this issue. This item was tabled until discussion with the attorney
takes place.

•

The updating and maintenance of the mailing list and database was
discussed. General consensus was that while there is room for
improvement in our current system, confidentiality must be
maintained when considering updated software and the
transference of the existing information. Further discussion was
tabled pending additional information on existing database.

•

New letterhead design was approved.

$ 3013.07
$ 1310.00

$ 490.53
$ 3732 .54

•

The president stated that a notebook of "policies and procedures"
would be started. When a process is identified by the board that
would be best passed on to a new board in writing, it will be
written, submitted for board approval and filed in the notebook.
There is no specific method presently in place for instructing
incoming board members on the business details of Friends North.

•

There was discussion on the results of the recent membership
renewal mailing. Approximately 86 (out of 300+) renewal forms

& LESBIAN BOOK GROUP

Aimee/Sheila McRae/awesome@freeway.net
On the last Monday in March (the 31st to be exact) and every
last Monday of every month thereafter, Aimee from Borders Books,
Music, and Cafe, will be facilitating a Gay & Lesbian Literature and
Studies Book Group. In March we'll discuss "And Say Hi to Joyce"
by Deb Price and Joyce Murdoch. But even if Deb and Joyce aren't
your cup of tea, please come on out and show your interest in the
group so that we may all decide what to read next month, or even
decide if we need two separate groups (one for gay lit, one for
lesbian). Books chosen for discussion receive a 20% discount at
Borders, and we try to just read paperbacks to keep the cost down
and make the book group accessible to everyone.

Financial report:
Opening Balance as of 1/1/97
Total Revenue
Tota I Expenses
Closing Balance as of 1/31/97

The issue of membership in Friends North include persons under
the age of 18 years was tabled as there has not been a complete
response from the attorney.

GAY

Board business at the February meeting included:
•

•

,r - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - ,

HAIR FORCE ONE
SOI West Front Street
Traverse City. MI 49684

502 E. Eighth St. • 616-94 7-1965

For Appointment Call

COPIES • PRINTING • SHIPPING • FAX

941-8255

Joann Ewing • Brian Bensett • Richard Curtis
Mark Lizenby

NETWORKING 4S'NORTH

A DIVISION OF LASER PERFECT PLUS, INC.
-5-

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

Contributions

with a Canadian friend the other night on the phone and he was
telling me about how much his views on homosexuality have
changed over the years. They have changed by educating himself and
meeting gay and lesbian folk. He said putting a face to a name is so
important in reaching out to others.
I'm not sure how we got on the topic but, we started talking about
people having regrets in life. I told him I really didn't have any, as I
think holding on to past mistakes is not productive or positive. He
said he only has one regret in life and if he could turn back the clock
he would. He told me of when he was in middle school and one
sunny day, after lunch, his classmates were outside playing. There
was an effeminate boy who was by himself and often was the butt of
many bad jokes. It was assumed that this boy was gay. Well my
friend in Canada, was dared by his buddies, to walk over and smash
a piece of cake in this boys face. And he did. He said if there was
ever a way to track this guy down and tell him he's sorry, he would
do it. Strange how things always come back to us. Guilt can be a
horrible thing to carry around. I'm glad my friend in Canada has
grown over the years to understand diversity and how important it is
for all of us. I hope he can move on and get rid of his past regret.
Best wishes to the Safe Schools project going on in Traverse City.
If you would like to get some information on this contact, M'Lynn
through Friends North or at GLSTN Traverse City.
Until next time, seek out positive people, influence others and
educate our community. I look forward to writing to you in the next
newsletter.

FROM THE COMMUNITY

NOitS,jOTIINGSAND NEWS FROM THE NORTH
by Greg R. Baird
Hello everyone! Since my last column in Jan-Feb, my life has
been so busy with many wonderful happenings. I found it difficult
to write about one topic this time around as I had so much to share.
So I am mixing a pot of literary soup and pouring it out for everyone
to take a taste.
My last column I had asked people to write me and tell me if they
feel a sense of community in their area and where do they go to find
it. I also had asked if they didn't have that community feeling to write
me and possibly I could hook them up with a group. Well, the mail
has been rolling in, but I'm always looking for more. I am going to
use this information for a future article and also to guide some people
in a positive direction.
*Some people who have responded from the U.P. tell me they
have nothing to do, and that most people either go to a local straight
bar to hang out or attend one of the occasional dances they have in
Canada. Other folks meet for movies or potlucks and some inquired
about the Gay dinner group in Petoskey. (Every Thursday at 7:00 pm
at the Park Garden Cafe)
I had a lovely letter from a lesbian in Traverse City, telling me of
how she finds it hard to meet people in the area. She is older and
would love to find that sense of community and meet other mature
lesbians. Going out for lunch and movies occasionally would be a
lot of fun for her. Now I don't want to play' matchmaker like in
"Fiddler on the Roof", but I would like to direct this lady in the right
direction. Any suggestions would be welcome.
I had the pleasure of meeting and working with Jeanne WhiteGinder, mother of Ryan White, when she came to North Central
Michigan College to give a lecture in October of 1996. She was
impressed by my work in speaking out in support of gay and lesbian
youth and the community I live in . So as Jeannes' guest I am getting
ready to leave in a few days to go to Chicago and speak at The 4th
Annual Ryan White National Youth Conference on HIV/AIDS. I will
be speaking to youths ages 14 to 25 and adult service providers who
work with youth on "Starting a Gay/Straight Alliance in School and
Building a Positive Community." This is a wonderful opportunity for
me and something I have always wanted to do.
Being a positive role model for gay, lesbian and bisexual youth
is something all of us adults should be doing. I am looking forward to
bringing back information on HIV/AIDS, gay, lesbian and bisexual
issues and many other agenda items. If your school or group would
like to have me speak, please contact me. A special thanks to Friends
North and H.A.N.D.S for supporting me in this venture in Chicago.
Have you ever had someone say something to you that was a bit
profound and you couldn't get it off your mind? Well, I was talking

NElWORKING 45°NORTH

DENIALS OF CONSCIOUSNESS
Cindy Robb
Recently, my 21 year old gay son moved home from Chicago.
Benjamin is a del ightfu I young man who was going through some growth
crunches of "what do I want to do with my life," I was happy that he felt
close enough and comfortable enough to go through this growth with
us, his family, and had the guts and confidence to come back to the rural
farm town of Suttons Bay where he grew up and knew too wel I the
homophobic attitudes that exist here.
One day, he was really down and said to me, "Mom, I wish I had all
my school pictures of myself growing up so I could just see how I've
evolved to where I am today." I said, "Follow me." We went to a small
room in the basement, and with a bit of rearranging, I uncovered a very
large trunk. I had not thought about the trunk for many years. It was
packed full of EVERYTHING I had saved of Ben's, his lifetime in a box so
to speak.
We opened it and both sat on the floor cross-legged and began what
would become a long afternoon examining everything from his fifth
grade bug collection, to his baby book, to book reports, school papers,
report cards, pictures, scrapbooks, articles, letters, clothing from special
occasions, and every gift he had ever made for me. We laughed and
laughed until our sides hurt, and then at the very bottom of the trunk was
a plastic bag. I pulled it out and removed from inside, a small tattered

-6-

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

Denials (continued from previous page)

A BROTHER'S STORY

pair of tap dancing shoes. We both just stopped, tears spilling into our
eyes, for these worn tap dancing shoes represented something very deep.
I immediately felt sadness and shame.

Alan Williams
I've known him for over a year now. When we met over the Internet
(via a mutual friend), he was not quite 16 years old-a shy, scared kid who
lived in my hometown in Illinois. We've never spoken on the phone, and
we have only seen pictures of each other, sent over the 'net-but we think
of each other as brothers we wished we had instead of our biological ones.
We even call each other "bro" when we talk over the 'net. He was unsure
of himself, trying to reconcile his strict Christian upbringing with the fact
that he might be gay.
We traded long letters. He would write about how he hated himselfmostly how he hated the idea that he was gay. I would write back about
how being gay is not an easy thing to deal with at first, and how it takes
time to adjust. I would remind him that hating himself didn't make the
journey any easier. "Don't give up hope," I would write, time and time
again. "There are others like you out there. It's just a matter of time until
you find them." He would write to me about his dreams of how much
better life would be when he had a boyfriend. I would write back and tell
him that happiness lay within, not in the arms of a fantasy lover.
He slowly started to change. He stopped hating himself for being gay.
He accepted it, and he acknowledged the frustration of living with parents
who couldn't understand him, and living in an area where being young
and gay was a sure-fire recipe for being bashed. He went from "I hate being
gay" to "I hate being gay where I am ." I wrote to him that a time would
come when being gay and being himself would be one and the same.
"There will be a time and a place," I wrote, "when you will be able to leave
the closet behind ."
Our conversations moved to the Internet Relay Chat. On IRC, I could
respond directly to what he wrote, and even as our friendship grew, he
found over IRC what I couldn't give him. He found other gay teens. He
was no longer alone, but he was stubborn. "There are others like me," he
wrote, "but they're all so far away." At least he'd made a few steps.
Time and time again I worried about him. I would talk to my friends about
him. When I met my boyfriend, he would sit and listen to me talk about my
little brother. He started talking to my brother too, and in time my boyfriend
became my teenage friend/brother's "brother-in-law" and a new confidant.
Another teen came to IRC, and lo and behold, he also lived in my
hometown. My brother was scared to talk to him at first-"What if he's
really a basher?" he asked-so I spoke to the newcomer and found him to
be just what he said he was-another lonely gay teen in need of a friend .
"Talk to him," I told my brother. So they did. It wasn ' t easy at first-they

I think Ben felt badly for me because he knows how much I love him
and how I would never consciously hurt him, and yet here in my hands I
held the evidence to prove my early denial of who my wonderful son really
was and is today. We both knew, without saying a word.
In 1981, Ben was six years old. I was a single mom and I worked three
jobs to support us. I always worked when Ben was either asleep or in
school. That way, he would think I was always home for him. Ben's
interests centered mostly around the arts & entertainment category and I
didn't see any problem with any of it until he came home and asked to
take tap dancing lessons. I remember like it was yesterday thinking, oh,
no, can't you play baseball, or do something more like a "boy." I thought
he'd get teased and he already was really exhibiting "sissy" type behavior,
I never spoke my conscious thoughts, but SAID, "Well, I'll think about it. ..
but I don't know ... "
I was just hoping this whole thing would just go away, but it didn't.
Instead of saying 'no' without a good reason, I simply said, "I can't afford to
pay for tap dancing lessons." I thought the issue was moot, and I felt relieved,
that I could now be more comfortable in my unconscious denial.
Working three jobs and being home during Ben's waking hours was a
trick! I worked the night shift in our local hospital, and on Saturday mornings
Ben was home but I needed to sleep, so he would wake me and tell me of
his plans for the morning, and I would get up around noon. It seemed to me
that he was spending a lot of Saturday mornings with "Brian," one of the
boys on our block, but I was glad they had such a good time together.
Reality slapped me in the face one Saturday morning when Ben walked
in the door a few minutes later than usual, and handed me a pair of tap dancing
shoes and a letter and said "Please Mom, don't be mad." I sat down and
opened a letter from the Meg Nutting School for Dance. Mrs. Nutting and I
knew one another personally. The letter read, "Dear Cindy; I would do
anything not to hurt you and I truly hope this does not embarrass you, but Ben
has been coming to my Studio of Dance every Saturday morning for the past
four months and has shown great interest in taking tap. He just sits and watches
my class so intently and I'd inquired many times as to his interest and he finally
told me you cannot afford to pay for lessons. I have given Ben this pair of tap
shoes for five dollars, and have agreed to give him lessons for one dollar of his
allowance money per week, but I still need your permission."
Feeling very guilty, I gave my permission. It wasn't until eleven years
later, Ben had the courage to finally come out to me so I could face what I

Brothers (continued next page)

had denied all along.
What those tap shoes represent for me today is the commitment I have
to all gay and lesbian youth. I gave my son food, shelter, clothing, my time
and all my love and it was not enough, for he knew i didn't want to know

Carolyn R. Delo

who he really was. Today, through my work with PFLAG, I help other
parents "wake up" far earlier than I did.

Sales and Leasing

As a matter of fact, a few weeks ago, I spoke with a mother who thinks
her seven year old might be gay. That child has a much better chance of

1331 South Garfield
Traverse City, Michigan 49686

growing up healthy, without pain and confusion.
I am committed that my goals for public education of all youth on gay

Telephone 616-941-0770
FAX 616-941-8145
1-800-942-4 724

& lesbian issues, will become a reality in my lifetime.
Opening that old trunk that day was no accident. As we walked up the
stairs, I turned to Ben and said, "Now do you remember who you are?" and
he simply smiled and said, "Thanks, Mom."
NETWORKING 45°NORTH

-7-

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

Brothers (continued from previous page)
liked each other, but each thought the other was disinterested. I became
the facilitator, counselor, and pillar of support. I relayed messages, lent the
not-so-occasional virtual shoulder, played cheerleader, smacked the wall
in frustration, talked to my boyfriend for hours on end about everything.
Over time, the fri'end I cared for like a brother, and the newcomer whom I
saw as a friend now, started to open up to each other.
Which naturally meant a monkey wrench would enter.
I got a call from my boyfriend. He asked me to get on line to talk to my
brother. When I arrived on IRC, I got the news: The newcomer's parents
had discovered their son's secret. They were thinking of throwing him out
of the house because they didn't want any "queers" living under their-roof.
My first thought was a last resort. If my new friend was thrown out of
his house, I would take him in. It was a first thought because it would mean
he was safe; it was a last resort because I couldn't stand the thought of the
two boys being separated by hundreds of miles. My brother became his
friend's pillar of support; they would talk to each other on the phone, and
then my brother would come online for advice and a listening ear. I saw
my brother become a strong young man, with a big heart and a developing
real love for the teenager with whom he'd shared so much. It made me
wonder how someone not even related to me could be so much like me,
for he was responding to his friend the same way that I had responded to
him-answering the call of someone who was hurting.
I was so proud of him.
Things calmed down. No one was kicked out of his house. Things
began to turn around, and on Valentine's Day, the two boys met for their
first date, bringing with them all the feelings that had been growing
between them, as well as their feelings about being gay. Afterward my
brother wrote to me. "I can actually say," he wrote, "that today was the
first day that I was proud to be gay, and felt good about it. I can now
realize how normal being gay is and that I like that I am." He told me
that what had helped, besides the date, was the issue of XY magazine (a
magazine for gay youth) which I had sent to his friend, and which he had
received from his friend that night.
I smiled as I read the screen. My brother was finally accepting himself.
He wrote to me again, of a chance meeting the next day with his nowboyfriend. He told me how good it felt to be in each other's arms in a long
hug, and how much he felt for his new boyfriend. "I haven't told him yet,"
my brother wrote, "but I think when I get done talking to him tonight, I'll
tell him that I love him. Because I really do." In the time that I have known
him, this unofficially-adopted little brother of mine has gone from a shy,
scared kid to a young man who has faced his fears and come through them
with love in his heart, and someone to share that love with.
I couldn't be prouder if he were my own brother.

AFFIRMING CHRISTIANITY
by Linda Wilson
This article is in response to various articles that have appeared in
Networking 45° North in the past in reference to "spiritual" or "religious"
concerns. I offer the following as one viewpoint of an evangelical
Christian Lesbian.
Having learned how easy it is to misunderstand what someone is
saying due to the lack of a definition of terms, let me define what I mean
by "evangelical" and "Christian" (I am assuming I do not need to define
"lesbian!").
By evangelical I am referring to the belief that the Bible is the Word
of God, that there is, in fact, a God who has revealed Himself through
Jesus Christ, that Jesus Christ is the One through whom one finds eternal
life and forgiveness of sins, and that one can have a personal relationship
with this God by accepting the life that Jesus Christ has offered. In the old
fashioned terminology, one can, indeed, be "born-again" to a fulfilling
spiritual life by choosing to follow the Jesus Christ of the Bible.
By Christian I am referring to those who claim to follow the Lord
Jesus Christ and who live their lives with the purpose of seeking to know
Him better and to live according to the principles set forth in the New
Testament. "Church" refers to those who have chosen to believe in and
follow Jesus Christ as the "Savior," whereas "church" refers to
denominations.
Fundamentalists are those who believe that they hold all truth in
their group, and feel they have an obligation to keep the faith as they
define it, pure and undefiled by any opinion that might differ from what
they believe to be true. They cite Old Testament stories of "God" telling
Israel to stomp out the enemies and to maintain themselves as separate
and distinct from the surrounding peoples, as evidence and authority that
today, as the Church of god, they must eradicate the "opposition" which,
in one instance, happens to be us!
It is important not to react in like kind to the type of angry, irrational
behavior that the churches have demonstrated towards the gay and
lesbian community. My own mother supports the OCA in Oregon and
subscribes to both Pat Robertson's and James Dobson's literature. She is
such a sweet person in so many ways, but she has never taken the time
(nor does she have the inclination), to study any other possible biblical
interpretation than the one she has heard in her church and in the
literature she receives.
There are thousands of examples that one could find to prove the

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VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/APRIL 1997

point that some will never take the time to listen to a differing opinion.
This may be a fault of the church, but it is certainly not the fault of the
Church. Those who are truly part of the Church recognize that they do
not hold all truth in their hands, and that there just might be something
outside of their knowledge that is, indeed, truth.
For me, any truth is from God because I start with the premise that
God is pure truth, pure love, etc. However, because of the deep hurt that
has been caused by those who call themselves Christians, especially by
those who call themselves evangelical Christians, it is necessary to write
an article such as this one. Why? Because I too am an evangelical
Christian who is so deeply committed to Jesus Christ.
I cannot conscientiously be a part of any of those groups because
they have a flaw in their understanding of the Bible that does not permit
one to be committed to Jesus Christ and be called an evangelical
Christian, and be gay or lesbian!
However, it is an entirely inappropriate response to turn away from
the truth of the Bible and the meaningfulness of a relationship with Jesus
Christ and the power of the Holy Spirit to grow in that relationship,
simply because the church has problems. Yes, I have trouble with
churches. No, I do not have trouble with Jesus Christ. Nor do I have
trouble with the Bible as my sole source of information about Jesus
Christ, and the principles for living as explained in the New Testament.
I am unable to live completely that which I fully understand, let alone
worry about those parts I do not!
I wish everyone who loved and followed Jesus Christ would
demonstrate by their tolerance and understanding, His attitudes and
attributes. I wish I could do that completely . But I am imperfect and
working on areas of my life that need to be healed, transformed,
stretched, and much more. The experience I have with Jesus Christ is so
much more precious and meaningful that the obvious hatred and anger
of others who claim to know Him, that I hold on to my faith and ask that
He would somehow touch their lives. However, to turn from my faith
because of the inconsistency, mean-spiritednes, and error of a large part
of "Christian" churches, would be no different than not taking advantage
of many things that are good for me but are abused by others (i.e., motor
vehicles, medicine, sex, food, love, government, religion, etc.)
When I was in the church, I heard accusations that we were
intolerant and unloving towards those who were "pagan." Now that I
am outside of the church I find that those who are not Christians can be
intolerant and unloving as they claimed the church was. My choice of
my faith, my personal relationship with Jesus Christ, and my belief in the
Bible as God's Word, deserve to be respected by those who do not agree

m
,f

with me in the same manner as they wish for me to be respectful of their
choice to believe or not believe in something of their own. I do not follow
my faith blindly, nor with a lack of intellectual integrity. I do not choose
to be an evangelical Christian oblivious to the sickness that pervades so
much of traditional church life these days. I study profusely to come to
the conclusions that make up the meaning in my spiritual life. And I am
at peace.
If there is enough interest to do so, I would gladly provide a study of
different passages in the Bible to show that they are being interpreted in
light of what some groups wish to have as their agenda against gays and
lesbians. The reality of both history and church history proves them
wrong, as well as do the actual words used in the Bible that today are
translated as "homosexual."
No where does the Bible specifically condemn loving, same-sex
acts. Also, the words that could have been used, had the writers wanted
to specify "loving same sex acts," were not used - neither in the Old or
New Testaments. The major "proof" Scriptures are Leviticus 18:22 and
20:13, Genesis chapters 18, 19, and 20 which recount the story of
Sodom and Gomorrah, Romans 1:16-32, I Corinthians 6:9-11, I Timothy
1:9-10, and the book of Jude, verse 7.
Not one of these passages in the Hebrew Old Testament, Greek
New Testament, or Greek Septuagint, uses the words that were
commonly used to signify homosexual. None of them is used to define
homosexuality as sin. Obviously, if the actual word for homosexuality is
not even used, then it follows that it is impossible for it to be classified as
a sin from these Scriptures. If God hated homosexuals and homosexuality
(loving same-sex relationships) so much, one would think, (since He is
believed to have inspired the writers) that He could have at least used
the words that everyone in that time and place understood to mean
homosexuality. However, He did not. That is a highly significant fact.
There is more. It takes a long time to discuss all the ramifications of
condemning homosexuality because many other traditional beliefs (i.e.,
the belief that marriage is principally for the purpose of procreation, the
purpose of the Law, etc.) have to be dismantled one by one to come to
the truth of the Bible.
To conclude for now: if you were, or are, a Christian and gay or
lesbian, and would like to follow your faith with joy and peace, rest
assured you certainly can! You are a great and wonderful creation of a
loving Creator. He made us, and He loves us.

Linda Wilson , BS, MA, DD is a practicing massage therapist
in Suttons Bay, Michigan, an instructor at Kirtland Community College, and
presently is seeking ordination.

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VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

TI IF TI IE D

IL A
(Note: All classified announcements as well as personals are run without
charge. Please submit them in writing to the Friends North address, or
call the editor (616-271-3042) and leave the advertisement on the
answering machine along with a contact phone number)

NEW ANNOUNCEMENTS
VOLLEYBALL!: Anyone interested in playing volleyball at the 1998 Gay
Games in Amsterdam, please call to discuss. Contact Bill at 616-845-5220.
(issue 4)
GLSTN - Traverse City: The next scheduled meeting is March 17th at 7:00
pm, at Third Level on Front St., in TC, and the featured speaker will be Greg
Baird, from Petoskey. Greg has just returned from the Ryan White
convention and will have a lot to share with the group. All are welcome!
Contact M'Lynn at 943-8800 (issue 2)
GAY-LESBIAN BOOK DISCUSSION GROUP is meeting monthly on the first
Tuesday of each month, 7:30 pm, at Border's Bookstore on S. Airport Rd.,
T.C. For info, call Border's at 933-0412 and ask for Joe. (issue 4)

ON-GOING ANNOUNCEMENTS
GAY GAMES IN 1998: Team Great Lakes is organizing for the upcoming
games in Amsterdam, scheduled for August 1-5, 1998. Those interested,
please call Ann Heier at 810-547-4692. Team Great Lakes sent 180
individual athletes and teams to New York City in '94. (Issue 6)
BI-MONTHLY, Bl-SEXUAL, WOMEN'S LUNCHEON: Meet the first and third
Tuesday of each month, from 11 :30 am until 1:00 at a local, Traverse City
restaurant Call Pamela at 922-0734 or contact Friends North. (issue 2)
PLEASE SPONSOR OUR POSTCARD PROJECT: They do make a difference!
The cost for printing the 2800 postcards is $100.00. To contribute specifically
to the Postcard Project, please call Richard at 271-3042 or send a check (in
an amount of $100.00 or less) directly to Friends North. (issue 4)
QUESTIONS ABOUT HIV AND AIDS? Call locally 24 hours a day to 9471110. This program is sponsored by the HIV/AIDS Wellness Networks Grand
Traverse Area and is staffed by Third Level Crisis Center volunteers. (Issue 6)
THE UNITARIAN UNIVERSALIST CONGREGATION OF PETOSKEY is
meeting at the Concord Academy, 2230 East Mitchell St. Services will be
held on alternate Sundays with dates disclosed in their newsletter, Diversiti.
Please call 348-3117 for details or write to us at POB 271, Petoskey, Ml
49770-0271 (Issue 6)
REPORT HATE CRIMES!! The Triangle Foundation of Michigan has begun a
VICTIMS' PROGRAM COMMUNITY WATCH COALITION. The group will
collect hate-crime information from Lesbian and Gay victims of such crimes.
For details, call 313-533-1166 or 51 7-753-9823. Report Hate Crimes! Stop
the Violence! (issue 6)
GRAND TRAVERSE COUNTY HEALTH DEPARTMENT: Their Reproductive
Health Clinic is open to women and men of all ages. Confidential services
provided are physical exams, HIV counseling and testing, pregnancy testing,
sexual transmitted disease testing and treatment, all methods of birth control
available, FREE Norplants, Depo-Provera, IUDs, and Condoms. For more
info about these and other methods which are charged on a sliding fee scale,
call 922-4630. Services are by appointment only. (issue 6)

PERSONALS:
ROOMMATE WANTED for shared housing. Private room with cable,
laundry, for $21 0lmonth. Phone 935-3749 (issue 2)
GWF-Age 51, shirt and jeans woman .. . loves good company, long Sunday
drives, country music, nature, picnics, camping, and much more. I am
honest, sincere, caring and romantic. Looking for a good close friend and
possibly more, so any singles out there, please write. I will answer all.

NflWORKING 45°NORTH

-10-

Sharon, 8595 N.E. Limits, Mancelona, Ml 49659 (issue 2)
GWF-43, Never married. Looking to meet new friends; soon to have new
location-hopefully real soon. Redneck town's not for me after six years
moving back home from the city. Time to move on and out. Write to: Vickie
Gliech, 17768 S. Tilson Rd., Rudyard, Ml 49780. Relocation upon finding a
new residence and the sale of the current residence. New job location with
Restaurant Mgmnt. as profession. Send name, address and or phone number
and I will respond. (issue 3)
ROOMMATE WANTED TO SHARE 3 bedroom home in north T.C. Person
must like animals, nonsmoker; close to lake, washer/dryer, large yard.
References and Deposit: Shelley 946-1085 (issue 2)

GROUPS:
FRIENDS NORTH BOARD AND MEMBER MEETINGS: The Friends North
Board meets on the first Tuesday of each month at 6:30 pm. at their NEW
LOCATION at Grace Episcopal Church, corner of Washington and
Boardman Streets, across from the Old Courthouse. ALL ARE WELCOME,
(issue 1)
COMMON VOICES-FRIENDS NORTH RAP GROUP is a group of men and
women who get together monthly for informal discussion, often on a
particular topic. Please join us on the 2nd Wednesday of every month at
Grace Episcopal Church, 349 Washington, T.C., at 7:30pm. For information,
call Tom at 275-6127 or Ed at 947-4697. (issue 2)
GLSTN, the Gay-Lesbian-Straight Teachers Network, is meeting the third
Monday of each month at 7:00 p.m. at Third Level, 1022 East Front Street,
Traverse City. They welcome all interested educators. For more information,
call M'Lynn at 943-5050. (issue 6)
P-FLAG: (Parents, Friends and Families of Lesbians and Gays.) This is a
network of parents, friends, and families of lesbians and gays who meet
monthly to offer information, support, and a place to talk with others about
the issues concerning them. Gays and Lesbians are also welcome and
encouraged to attend P-FLAG meetings. Meet at Grace Episcopal Church
every third Wednesday of the month, at 7:30 pm. For more information call
Cindy Robb at 271-5045 (Issue 4)
WINDFIRE: This is a local youth support group for teens and others under
the age of 25, which meets on a weekly basis in an atmosphere that is
comfortable and friendly. Please contact Third Level at 922-4800 or 1-800442-7315 for location, date and time. (issue 2)
OUT 'N ABOUT is a lesbian coffeehouse featurrng entertainment as well as
a chance to meet others from the area. It all happens at the Unity Church,
3600 Five Mile Rd. in T.C. Please see the Out 'n About calendar elsewhere
in this newsletter for times and specific activities. (issue 2)
TRAVERSE CITY FRONTRUNNERS If you are interested in running, call Paul
or Jim at271-4510 and leave your name, number, and that you are interested
in Frontrunners. We will return your call with information on where to meet.
All ages and abilities are welcome. (issue 4)
WELLNESS NETWORKS SUPPORT GROUP is for people with HIV or AIDS
and they welcome you to attend. Please drop in Monday evenings from 6:00
to 7:30 pm at the Grace Episcopal Church library at 341 Washington in
Traverse City. Every fourth Monday of the month the Significant-Other
Support Group will be meetingat3301 Veterans Drive, Suite 221, just north
of S. Airport Road. For further information, please call 933-0279. (issue 6)
THE PETOSKEY GROUP: A social group for lesbian, gay and bi-sexual
persons is meeting weekiy in Petoskey. The group meets at 7 p.m. Thursdays
at the Park Garden Cafe on Lake Street. For information please contact Tim
at 348-8151 (issue 3)
NORTHERN MICHIGAN WOMYN'S CHOIR is always looking for new
voices. To obtain more information or for a performance schedule, please
contact Deb at 275-5924. (issue 3)
H.A.N.D.S is an HIV/AIDS Network located in Petoskey. They are currently

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/APRIL 1997

FRIENDS NORTH SCHOLARSHIP FUND
As mentioned in the President's Column, the Friends North Board recently developed and approved a policy/procedure
and application form to access the Friends North Scholarship Fund (formerly known as the Community Needs Fund). You
will recall that part of each membership fee is designated to help maintain this fund, as well as other donations which are
specified to go into this account. This fund is yet another benefit of becoming a member of the organization! Contact any
board member or call our phone line to receive an application.
FRIENDS NORTH, INC
SCHOLARSHIP APPLICATION

FRIENDS NORTH, INC
SCHOLARSHIP FUND

Application Date: _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __

POLICY/PROCEDURE

Applicant Name:

POLICY:

Address:

Phone:
Are you a current Friends North Member:

Yes

No

Verified by:
(Board Member)

Friends North, Inc., shall maintain and administer a
scholarship fund available to members in good standing of
Friends North. Monies for this fund shall be collected from
donations, a percentage of membership fees, and Board
approval of gener"l operating funds. These funds are to be
used specifically for gay/lesbian/bisexual/transgender
educational pursuits.

Amount Requested:
Needed by:
(date)
Total Fees (if different from above amount:
Event Title: _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __
Event Location:

-----------------

Event Date: _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __

Mail to:
Friends North, Inc.
PO Box562
Traverse City, MI 49685-0562

PROCEDURE:
1. Application is made by any member of Friends North
to any member of the Board of Directors.
2. A majority of the Board of Directors must approve
the scholarship request (in quorum) at the next
scheduled Board meeting. (At the discretion of the
President of the Board, this may be done in an
informal meeting, i.e., phone, via fax, e-mail, etc.)
3. A maximum scholarship of $100 or any portion
thereof may be awarded.
4. Scholarships are limited to once per year per member.

Received by: _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __
(Board Member)
Approved: _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __
(Board President or Designee)
Approval Date: _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __
Check No.:

-----------------

Date Check Mailed to Applicant:

Treasurer's Initials: _ _ _ _ __

5. Scholarships are awarded on a first-come, first-served
basis as funds are available.
6. Scholarship recipients are required to report to the
Board (oral or written) within sixty (60) days of the
event date.
7. The Board of Directors may, with a 2/3 majority of
the full Board, direct a larger amount than the
maximum to be awarded.

ALBRECHT & JENNINGS ART ENTERPRISES
3546 Woodland Trail
Williamsburg, Ml 49690

616-938-2163

MICHELANGELO, MACKINTOSH
and 200ARTDEALERS IN CHICAGO
FRIDAY,MAY9-SUNDAY,MAY11,1997

-----------------------------------------------------DETACH AND S E N D - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

MICHELANQELO, MACKINTOSH and 200 ART DEALERS IN CHICAGO
MAY9-MAY11, 1997
NAME

-------------------------------

ADDRESS

------------------------------

CITY

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -STATE- - - -ZIP- - - - - - - -

PHONE-DAY
EVENING
-------------SINGLE _ _ _ _DOUBLE
TRIPLE_ _ _ _ SMOKING yes no
KING _ _ _ _TWINS
ROLLAWAY_ _ _ _HANDICAPPED ACCESSIBLE yes no
ROOMMATE(S) _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __
We will NOT assign roommates
CREDIT CARD #_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ EXP. _ _ _ _ MC, AMX, VISA, CB, DC
(TO HOLD THE HOTEL ROOM)

NAME ON CARD

----------------------------

Enclose $112.00 (check or money order, NO CREDIT CARDS FOR REGISTRATION) for transportation and museum
tickets. THIS MUST BE RECEIVED BY APRIL 2. NO REFUNDS AFTER APRIL 2. Please pay by check or money
order made out to Albrecht & Jennings Art Enterprises.

SURVEY FOR SPEAKER'S LIST
P-FLAG is compiling a list of persons who would be willing to speak to groups
and\or participate in panel discussions.
From time to time P-FLAG receives a request from a group or organization
asking for discussion concerning our gay\lesbian children and friends and our
relationships to our community.
This is an excellent format Parents and Friends can use to share their
acceptance and appreciation. It is yet one more opportunity for our gay and
lesbian friends and children to share their stories.
PLEASE FILL OUT THIS QUESTIONNAIRE TO HELP US FILL THESE REQUESTS
NAME: _________________________________
ADDRESS: _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __
PHONE: _________

day

evening

TIME OF DAY YOU WOULD BE ABLE TO ATTEND: _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __
TOPICS you would be comfortable discussing:
Parenting- - - - - - - - -

Family Concerns

Legal Issues - - - - - - -

Human

Local Issues- - - - - - -

Myths

Local\National
Local\National

----------Rights
-------------

----------------Statistics
---------------------Opportunities
--------------------

Other:

Comments:

--------------------------------

Information/resources/training are available.
Please contact or send this form to: Penny Smith
10960 Blue Ridge Ln #37
Traverse City, MI 49684
Phone:
(616) 947-4462
E-mail ar967@traverse.lib.mi.us
Fax: (616) 929-5593

seeking volunteers in the northern lower peninsula and eastern upper
peninsula of Michigan. HANDS is a non-profit organization that has
committed itself to helping and supporting the needs of HIV infected persons.
They offer a number of services, including support groups, education, pub Iic
awareness, and one-on-one friendship support. Volunteers are urgently
needed in the Alpena, Gaylord, and Rogers City areas. If you would be
interested in the program, please call 616-526-9213. (issue 6)
GAY ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS: Meetings for gays and lesbians are
held each Saturday at 11 :00 am and have been moved to a new location at
Grace Episcopal Church, corner Washington and Boardman Streets in TC.
For further info, call John at 922-0746 or Tom at 947-4647. (issue 6)
FRIENDS LIKE US: A social group in north east lower Michigan for gay,
lesbian, and bisexual people. Meets monthly. For info, please contact Jeff@
517-354-7702, or write to him at POB 391, Alpena, Ml 49707. (issue 4)

SHARED LETTERS Reactions to the death of Gerry Crane
with thanks to Kathryn Ho/din for submitting

Crane gave so much to world
I knew Gerry Crane. My family and I met Gerry and Randy through
mutual friends, and we consider ourselves fortunate. Gerry was a
decent, kind and honest young man who had a solid, strong
commitment to educating children, to his life partner Randy, to his
family of friends and to God.
He had the courage of his convictions and he didn't lose this
courage or his convictions in what was probably the worst trial by fire
of his -life. This
world needs more
principled people,
more men like
Gerry and Randy
who aren't afraid
of commitments,
who
are
and
willing to stand up
for
what
they
believe regardless
of the adversity
and personal cost.
And what a cost it has been. His smile and his music have left us.
Gerry Crane was an honorable man, and he will be missed, but
he will not be forgotten. His time in this world was too short.
Cheryl Me/lb/om, Grand Rapids.

LETTERS
Thank You,
As one of the two friends who helped Carol at the end, and who
was with her from the beginning of her battle, I deeply appreciate the
comments from Ed Richardson and Gene Strang in your last issue.
Carol was a "people" person, but during her two-year ordeal, she
used all her strength to fight the cancer. Unfortunately that took her
out of the community.
To those who helped over the two years, giving her rides to the
hospital, etc. thank you.
To Ed, Gene & John who saw Carol shortly before her death, thank
you for caring.
On a personal note, to those volunteers and care givers who are
helping a terminally person now or will in the future, I pray God gives
you strength. I never could have imagined how difficult it could be,
emotionally and physically.
Hospice was absolutely wonderful, but we found that nurses,
either the Hospice of privately paid, were not available. Trying to get
some away time was nearly impossible.
Volunteers and care givers are very important, and although its
frustrating at times, and you feel you aren't doing enough, don't
despair. You are helping someone the best, you can. Even if you don't
think that person is aware. You are with them at a time when no one
should be alone. Feel good about yourself for that.
Kathy.

Follow Christ's message of love
I have been following the controversy in the Public Pulse letters
regarding the Byron Center teacher, Gerry Crane.
The anger, sadness and self-righteousness has gone on long
enough to turn everyone's stomach.
If I recall, in the Bible (which so many have taken to thumping so
very soundly) Christ gives us a new commandment to love one
another. I don't recall Him giving us the right to judge anyone. He
doesn't call us to judge-only to love, for love is the fulfillment of the
law. Love does not harm to a neighbor. And we are told that God is a
just judge who rewards the good and punishes the wicked. But we are
not called upon to make that distinction.

L, '-' ,.J

JenTees
customlscreenl printing

,41P

Full Service Apparel Printing

Team Uniforms T Buttons T EmbroideryT Photo Items
516 E. Eighth St. Traverse City, MI.

Open Monday-Saturday- 6:00 pm - Sunday at 2:00 pm

616..-929 ... 3610

616 ..- 935 ..- 1666 ..- 520 Franklin..- Traverse City, MI 49684
Proudl Ga Owned and O rated since 1989

NETWORKING 45°NORTH

-11-

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

Recently a writer to this column compared Byron Center to Salem
and the castigation of Mr. Crane to the witch hunt of the 1600s. Maybe
those who resent being called witch hunters and huntees ought to do
some serious historical study.
For almost 300 years since the "witch trials" the city of Salem has
set aside one day a year for prayer, reflection and atonement for the
wrongs done to those men and women accused, tried, sentenced and
put to death, mostly in the name of envy, greed and self-righteousness.
There's a message and lesson here. Is anyone paying attention?
Jean H. Taylor, Grand Rapids.

Crane's gift was music
Mr. Crane was a wonderful teacher. He taught us how to enjoy
music. In band we played many different kinds of music. He
introduced music from all different types of cultures to us.
The most important thing he taught us was how to really enjoy
music, which was by putting all our effort into playing a piece so it
would be perfect. Also, he taught us that we should never settle for
anything that is less than our best.
I know some people didn't agree with how Mr. Crane lived his
life, but who do they think they are to judge him and others like him?
Mr. Crane was always honest to us and always had us give it our all.
I think Mr. Crane was a gift from God. He helped us so much. He
put his heart into teaching us. Everyone thought he was a good
teacher. It makes me angry how when people found out that he was
a homosexual, they started turning their backs on him.
Doesn't the saying go, "Do unto others as you'd have done unto
yourself"?
Melissa DeMunter, Student, Byron Center High School

T. T . T
•

JUNE

29

IJ&lfo ¥/f .

T . V(f

T

.

AT THE ROBB FARM

tfJliJ

~RIDE "GARAGE SALE" Now's THE TIMET
•

T
•

T

•

... to staret collecting Treasures and
Junque for the Pride Sale.
So when spring cleaning
or just tripping over them...

•

T

•

T

Call Jim lngleson 922-0925 to arrange donations •

T • T

tfJlfJP{eltJJIIPf'dl(Jtl• •

Char P. Kirchner,

SECT ADMITS TO BOMBINGS
ATLANTA -A letter purportedly from a group called the Army
of God claimed responsibility for bombings at an Atlanta abortion
clinic and a gay nightclub, and threatened "total war" against the
federal government.
The letter was one of two claims of responsibility for the
February 21st bombing at The Otherside Lounge, which injured
five people.
Federal agents were examining a message left the day after the
bombing on the voice mail of the Phoenix-based Gay Community
Yellow Pages that claimed that the "Sons of Confederate Klan,
S.O.C.K., a new neo-Nazi KKK organization from Los Angeles"
had bombed the club. The message did not mention the attacks
last month on the abortion clinic.
The letter, which the FBI received Monday, promised future
attacks on gays and also sought to set up a system to confirm
claims of responsibility after future bombings.
'We're taking it seriously. We're looking into the validity of
the letter and the claims that they're making," said Pamela
Swanson, spokeswoman for the Georgia Bureau of Investigation.
FBI spokesman Jay Spadafore would not comment on the
authenticity of the letter, which was mailed to The Atlanta JournalConstitution and the Reuters news agency on Saturday and turned
over to federal authorities.
The letter was handwritten in block letters on three pages of
lined tablet paper, the newspaper reported, and said the Sandy
Springs abortion clinic was bombed because of the "murder" of
"3.5 million children" a year.
It said a second bomb that detonated 67 minutes after the first
"was aimed at agents of the so-cal led federal government," against
which it threatened "total war." The letter said Friday's bombing
"was aimed at the sodomite bar."
In Washington, President Clinton told an audience at a fundraiser that everyone must fight hate crimes. 'The recent bombing
of the gay nightclub in Atlanta reminds us that this work is not
over," Clinton said. "We have to stand against those things ."
Authorities are investigating possible links among the
nightclub bombing, the Jan. 16 abortion clinic attacks and the
bombing at the Centennial Olympic Park last summer.

T • T
~

CPA, MSA

>
.c
0.
0

Tax Returns - Confidential & Discreet

616

933
7116

Single Taxpayers - Use your filing status to your advantage
Un-Married Couples - Take advantage of all your options
433 W. 7th

Appointments in Williamsburg or Tra1/erse City
P. 0. Box 1040
Williamsburg, MI 49690-1040
NETWORKING 45' NORTH

St.

Traverse City

(616) 267-5818

Ml
-12-

49684

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

WORDS AND MUSIC: A LOOK AT
BOOKS, MAGAZINES, CD's AND TAPES
Rick Could
Spring is around the corner, last chance for Winter reading.
Here's a list from different book and music stores around our
Michigan area.
At The Bookie Joint, Shelley says they've had such a great
success selling new at 25% off that they'll stay in the new book
business for a while. Also, they have a growing selection of used
books at half the original cover price. This book business is on the
cutting edge these days! Shelley gave us these suggestions:
Too Queer, by Victoria Brownworth, $10.50, save over $3.00.
Brownworth's writing screams "Pay attention!"
Finale, edited by Michael Nava, $8.25. Murder, mystery and the
macabre, chronicled by today's best gay and lesbian mystery writers.
The Alyson Almanac 1997 Edition, edited by Gerry Kroll, $8.98. An
all-new edition of the most reliable book available to the gay and lesbian
community with a cyber guide to lesbian and gay on-line services.
And music: Between the Covers, Cris Williamson and Tret Fure,
Cassette- $9,95, CD-$14.95. Long time musicians and mates, this
duo creates some love-ly music. (Tickets to their May 9 Lansing
concert are available at the Bookie Joint.)
Work Out, the ultimate disc for exercise and dance. Cass.$10.95, CD-$16.95 .
At Borders, Aimee gave us this list:
Stages of Desire: Gay Theatre's Hidden History, by Carl Miller,
$17.95 . Sort of a "Celluloid Closet" for the theatre, Miller's book charts
the history of gay and lesbian representation on stage, from
Shakespeare to the 19th Century. Gives a fresh gay look at many classic
plays and brings forth rediscovered texts with gay or lesbian themes.
1997 Damron Women's Traveler, $11.95 Don't leave home
without this indispensable guide to everything lesbian on the road.
Provides a city by city look at where to stay, what clubs to check out,
special events, and community centers. Great for the girl who is
always on the go.
Funny Time to Be Gay, Ed Karvoski, Jr., $12 .00 Introduces us to
over 30 gay and lesbian comedians who tell their stories and those of
the gay community in ways guaranteed to make you smile, and quite
often laugh out loud. Pokes fun at stereotypes and makes us realize
that life is indeed what you make of it.
At AB CD's, Norm gave us these suggestions:
The English Patient, Original Soundtrack. From the Academy Award
nominated film. This is a guaranteed Oscar winner for best score.
Underworld, Second Toughest in the Infants. Techno at its very
best. This is a can't miss issue that appeared on several "Best of" lists
for the year end in 1996.
Gay Happenings, Volume 4. We loved Volume 1, we like
volume 2 & 3 - so here's Volume #4. Included with this volume is
Alicia Bridges, Hannah Jones and Sin with Sebastian.
Of Rage & Remembrance, Corigliano Symphony # 1, Leonard
Slatkin and the National Symphony Orchestra. Music defined by its
inspiration, signal works from the AIDS era. Symphony, mezzosoprano, Men's Chorus, boy soprano, low strings, timpani and
chimes. This was a Grammy-awarded nominated recording.
NE1WORKING 45°NORTH

Picture This, Jim Brickman. The thirc;J installment from solo
pianist on Windham Hill Records. In its second week of release, it's
already number 43 on the Billboard Charts. Featuring country vocalist
Martina McBride.
At Open Mind Books in Sault Ste. Marie, Dan gave us the
following suggestions:
Meow-mories, by Julia Willis, $6.95. No, it's not the
unauthorized biography of Andrew Lloyd Webber. It's that lesbian
humorist offering a charming, rib-tickling illustrated "baby book" for
cats. Not scotties?
Rainbow Arc of Fire by Greg Sanchez, $11.95. A novel of magic
and enlightenment set amongst the gay community of Colorado.
. Out With It: Gay and Straight Teens Write About Homosexuality,
edited by Andrea Estepa and Al Desetta, $8.00. In magazine format, this
title offers eye-opening insights on how young people view Les/Bi/Gays.
Mythology of Transgression: Homosexuality as Metaphor, by
Jamake Highwater, $23.00. An analytic work that explores how
sexual outsiders create cultural change.
At Waldenbooks, Kevin gave us this list:
Life is Not a Rehearsal, by David Brudnoy, $22.95. When this
conservative talk show host returned to his show after a hiatus, he
shocked his audience with an electrifying monologue in which he
revealed that he was gay and HIV-positive. The overwhelming
~upport he received from an audience not usually tolerant of gay/
issues was an even bigger surprise. Read this memoir.
Best Gay Erotica 1997, selected by Doug Sadownick, edited by
Richard Labonte. $14.95.
Best Lesbian Erotica 1997, selected by Jewelle Gomez, edited by
Tristan Taorimo. $14.95.
Dream Boy by Jim Grimsley, by $11 .00. This novel recounts the
story of first love between two adolscent boys who bravely sustain
each other in a world of domestic disintergration.
Coming out of Shame: Transforming Gay and Lesbian Lives, by
Gershen Kaufman, Ph.D . and Lev Raphael, Ph.D. Now in Paper back
at $11.00. This book exposes the role shame has come to play in the
lives of gays and lesbians, and how to begin a path toward growth
and acceptance.
Sanctuary: A Tale of Life in the Woods, by Paul Monette. Illustrated
by Vivienne Flesher, $16.00. This is the fine author's last work.
At B. Dalton's, several gay periodicals are carried, including
Advocate, Out, and Genre.
These stores appreciate your business and suggestions.

-13-

Activator Method (low force technique)
and gentle manual adjusting
Massage Therapy
Holistic Health & Wellness Educator
814-B S. Garfield• Traverse City, MI 49686
Res: 616-275-2502 • Office 616-933-4424

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

'

NEWS IN BRIEF

Christian Reformed Church in Canada Supports Gays

Henderson Doesn't Discriminate
The City of Henderson has apparently become the first
municipality in the state of Kentucky to publicly state that it does not
discriminate in employment matters based on sexual orientation .
Without public fanfare, celebration or dissent the words "sexual
orientation" were added to the non-discrimination list and to all
employment applications.

Israeli Military Grants Equal Rights to Gay Partner
The Israeli military recently made a landmark decision by
granting the rights of a spouse to the gay partner of a deceased officer.

Cobb County, Georgia Turns Against Past
Bill Byrne, the Chairman of the Cobb County Commission, said
that the anti-gay resolution of 1993 is history. With a new Board as
well as with the push of the Cobb Citizens Coalition, the Board
rescinded the original resolution which forced the Olympic
Committee to ban events from taking place within the county .

Austin Elects Lesbian Sheriff
Austin, Texas, the self-described progressive capital city of a
conservative state, elected the first open lesbian to the post of sheriff.
Margo Frasier, a lawyer and former jail supervisor in Travis County,
defeated her Republican opponent by a four point margin. She also
became the first woman to assume the position .
"People in Austin have a reputation for being a real fair-minded
community," said Kathleen DeBold of the Gay/ Lesbian Victory Fund.
Frasier' s opponent did not use her sexual orientation as an issue in
the campaign, saying that it wasn't relevant.

There is Gay Life in Rapid City
South Dakota' s first statewide organization for g/I/b/t persons
opened offices on Rapid City's Main Street in early February. Space
is provided for a gay library, a community center, and offices for the
group. Nearly 800 books and more than 1,000 periodicals are in the
collection at present.

Anchorage Allows Gay Clubs
The Anchorage, Alaska School Board has passed a final decision
regarding school clubs. They decided to continue allowing noncurriculum clubs, including the Diamond High Gay/Straight
Alliance. An amendment was included, however, to require parental
permission slips be signed-forms which must include the club's
statement of purpose- before a student can be permitted to join. That
amendment passed. This decision effectively ends the debate over
school clubs .

Don't Ask-Don't Tell Upheld
The U.S. Court of Appeals in San Francisco upheld the military's
ban on off-duty homosexual conduct, ruling that the poli cy is
constitutional even though it treats gays and heterosexuals differently.
The decision is the third by a federal appeals court to approve the
Clinton administration's policy on gay and lesbians in the military.
Judge Pamela Rymer said for the court: "For nearl y 20 years, w e have
upheld the constitutionality of the military's authority to discharge
service members who engage in homosexual acts. W e have
concluded that maintaining effective armed forces is indisputably a
compelling governmental purpose and that the policy of excluding
from the military those members who engage in homosexual conduct
is rationally related to that purpose."

Wayne-Westland, Michigan Schools Adopt New
Policy
The Wayne-Westland School Board has adopted poli c ies
banning "discriminatory harassm ent" of employees, board members,
and students on the basis of religion, race, color, nation al origin,
SEXUAL ORIENTATION, age, sex, height, weight, marital status,
handicap or disability. This policy applies to employees, vendors,
contractors or others doing business with the school district, students,
invitees, guests, etc. The new policy was adopted unanimously by the
Board of Education in January.

CJ?reative Solutions through Hypnotherapy

{ti Hypnotherapy will give you the Tools to Change your Life!

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Ellen's Big Day Set
According to the February 14 Hollywood Reporter, ABC has
tentatively set April 30th as the date for Ellen to come out as a lesbian .
"The final thumbs-up on Ellen's outing depends on ABC and Disney
executives approving a script, which has not.yet been submitted, "
spies said. Additionally, sources have revealed that Oprah Winfrey
has been approached to play Ellen's therapist.

NETWORKING 45°NORTH

An official body of the CRC in Canada, the Canadian arm of the
Grand Rapids, Michigan-based Christian Reformed Church, has
provoked a firestorm of controversy on both sides of the border. It has
told the Canadian government it supports legislation protecting the
civil rights of gays and lesbians in regard to housing, employment,
and other services. The church also suggested that legislation should
somehow accommodate same-sex partnership, arguing that
"mutually supportive relationships of a private and perhaps intimate
nature other than those understood by the familiar and historic terms"
of family and marriage "should be given a wholly new designation. "
(A more detailed report may be found in the RNS Daily Report,
@www.religionnews.com)

-14-

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relationship conflicts
addictions
eating disorders
depression & anxiety
stress management
self esteem issues
pain management
women's issues
childhood trauma
spiritual crisis

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

ESSAY

MCMANUS JOINS CIVIL RIGHTS PANEL
TRAVERSE CITY-State Rep. Michelle McManus, a leading
opponent of "reverse discrimination," has been given the top Republican
spot on the House Constitutional and Civil Rights Committee.
McManus, R-Lake Leelanau, vowed to work for "individual rights"
as opposed to "group rights" in her post as vice chairwoman of the
committee. In the past, she has sponsored legislation to ban preferential
treatment based on gender, national origin, religion, age, height, weight,
familial status or marital status.
"Choosing to support group rights at the expense of individual rights
perpetuates bias and pushes people farther apart," McManus said in a
prepared news release. "I look forward to working on this committee as
an advocate for every resident, and not just a select few."
Her legislation would have affected affirmative action plans of state
and local governments.
The civil rights appointment didn't sit well with Marvine Stamatakis,
chairwoman of the Traverse City Human Rights Commission.
"It is a setback for women, people of color and gays and lesbians."
she said. "I know she is opposed to affirmative action. I've never heard
her make any statements supporting civil rights issues. I feel there is a
valid issue to righting past wrongs."
McManus also was reappointed by the Republican Party to the
revised Human Services and Children Committee and the Conservation
Environment and Recreation Committee.
'

Get Ready for the ...

199 7 MICHIGAN PRIDE MARCH
Bill Beachler, Publisher Cay & Lesbian News, East Lansing
The plans for the 1997 Michigan Pride March are well underway.
This years activities will occur on June 20, 21 and 22, 1997. The
march and festival this year will again be on Saturday based upon last
year' s success. Block these days off your calendar now!
The Michigan Pride Committee has chosen the following theme:
FREE TO BE ... The GLBT community should be free to be happy, free
to be employed, free to be married, free to be home owners, free to
be pregnant and have children, free to be healthy, safe, out, alive,
loved and in love. These are the basic human rights that all people
should have and the equal rights the GLBT community wants.
Based upon 130 couples participating in last year's marriage
ceremony, the Committee hopes to continue the ceremony. Also, this
year the Committee is introducing a few features-the Living SAFE
Project. This project will include issues such as breast cancer, HIV/
AIDS, sexually transmitted diseases, substance abuse and partner
abuse. Based upon the success of last year's beer tent sponsored by
Mill Beer, the Committee is again looking for corporate sponsors.
Finally, the Committee is considering having a community picnic at
the Potter park Zoo on Sunday to include volleyball, canoeing,
biking, roller-blading and barbecuing as well as exploring the zoo.
The bad news last year is that the Committee ended the march in
debt. Therefore, the Committee has become a 501 (c)(3) organization
and is looking for memberships and donations. Checks may be made
payable to Michigan Pride and mailed to P.O. Box 16191, Lansing,
Ml 48901. If you have questions, you may call the Pride Hotline at
(517) 482-8656 or visit the Michigan Pride World Wide Web site at
http://www.myne.com/501 c/michprid/michprid.htm

NE1WORKING 45°NORTH

-15-

Ian Whitney
I have never heard any one state that growing up is an easy
process. If it were, then perhaps more people would attempt to do so.
In any case, growing up is a difficult and grueling road trip that leads
from one state of mind to another, never ending. For the "typical"
straight person, the transition into adulthood is, well, hellish. It is like
driving down a highway on which there are many traffic jams that
one must navigate through in order to reach the targeted destination.
In this analogy then, the road for gay adolescents is more like a
two-track in the Arctic Circle. This road is also covered with jammed
traffic, and in the sections that are one-way, semis with full trailers
speed towards you in the wrong direction . You just have to deal with
it.
I am, in may ways, an exception to the stereotypes that even
people in the older gay community and myself have developed about
gay youth . Or, perhaps I am not. In any case, most of my family (both
immediate and extended) know that I am gay, and they are all as
accepting and supportive as they can possibly be. The initial reaction
of most of my relatives has been, to this point, one that focuses not on
my sexual orientation or behavior but rather on how my sexual
orientation will make my life harder. Overall, however, being gay has ,
not made my life as difficult as the lives of many gay teenagers, and
that is an assumption- I know very few gay youth in this area (they
are there, but not out), and am therefore forced to rely upon
generalizations. I have seen the statistics, but then again, they are only
numbers. Knowing the people is different.
Aside from those at Interlachen (which is my school and another
reality altogether, and unreality but the way that it should be), I know
very few gay youth. I can say, with near confidence, that I know all of
those who are out within the gay community. At the high school in
Traverse City, there are only two "openly" gay people ("openly-" will
admit to someone other than themselves that they are gay), and even
they are somewhat closeted. In Traverse City, especially at the school
level, being closeted is part of everyday existence. I guess that this is
where I am, at most, an exception. I am so far out of the closet that I
can no longer see its entrance. Though this is not something to brag
about, it is nothing to be ashamed of. But it often confuses me.
Honestly, the hardest part of growing up gay is, in my case, being
one of the few "out" people in Traverse City. I often ask myself why I,
at seventeen, am more "out" than people twice or three times my age.
To some in this area, I am the first openly gay person that they know.
I had thought that the closeted part of the gay community was just
insecure, ashamed, or lacking courage. I have come to realize,
however, that those are not the reasons. Stepping out of the closet is
not always the best choice socially, personally, or economically. For
me, life has seemed much easier since I came out. Perhaps not easierit just makes more sense.
Making sense out of life is hard to do. Why am I gay? Why do
people hate me because I'm gay? I cannot make sense out of that.
Perhaps when I am older, I will undrestand. No. I will never be able
to understand hate. It is hard to understand love too. If only we would
sit and be, alive and happy in our existence and not interferring with

Essay (continued next page )
VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

Essay (continued from previous page )
the existence of others. That sounds like my definition of sensitivity, a
quality of maturity. Oh well, society has a lot of maturing, a lot of
growing up, to do. I ask myself- do we want to?
Bio- Ian Whitney lives in Leelanau County
and is a student at the Interlachen Arts Academy.
He can be reached via &mail at either
WHITNEYlj@interlochen.k12.mi.us or Moktir@aol.com.

LAMBDA LEGAL DEFENSE (USE

LOGO)

Tom Stoddard Dies
Thomas Stoddard, a civil rights lawyer who helped lead the fight
for gays to serve openly in the military, has died at age 48. Stoddard
died Wednesday of AIDS, according to his companion, Walter
Rieman.
As executive director of the Lambda Legal Defense and
Education Fund from 1986 to 1992, Stoddard fought for equal rights
for gay men, lesbians and people with AIDS. He maintained his
public role after leaving the organization and after becoming ill, most
recently leading the unsuccessful lobbying to end the ban against
gays serving openly in the military. More militant activists considered
his approach too conciliatory.
Former Mayor Ed Koch praised Stoddard's authorship of a 1986
New York City law that protects gays against discrimination in
housing, employment and public accommodation . "He was an
extraordinary lawyer." said Koch.
An early proponent of gay marriage, Stoddard and colleagues
debated the issue in a road show to build support within the gay
community, said Peg Byron, Lambda's public education director.
Stoddard and Rieman, also a lawyer, exchanged wedding vows and
gold bands in 1993.

FRIENDS NORTH, INC.,

DISNEY UNDER ATTACK
Three denominations have been added to a growing list of
Christian groups calling on the Walt Disney Company to return to a
more pro-family approach in its entertainment offerings. The three
groups whose stances have received recent attention are the Church
of God (Cleveland, Tenn.), the Presbyterian Church in America and
the International Church of the Foursquare Gospel.
Last June, messengers to the annual meeting of the Southern Baptist
Convention passed a resolution calling on Baptists "to give prayerful and
serious consideration" to whether to attend Disney theme parks and
purchase Disney products. The resolution suggested a boycott of Disney
if it continues "this anti-Christian and anti-family trend."
The executive council of the Church of God adopted a resolution
strongly critical of Disney and calling on the church's worldwide
membership of 4 million members and 2,500 congregations to
consider a boycott. The church has 800,000 members and 6,500
congregations in the United States.
The Church of God's resolution listed several concerns,
including:
• publication of "Growing Up Gay" by Disney-owned Hyperion
Press. The book encourages teens to explore homosexuality,
the resolution said.
• release of the movie "Priest" by Disney-owned Miramax, an
action the resolution called "a disappointing departure from
Disney's image of producing wholesome family films."
• provision of health insurance to "same-sex companions of gay
and lesbian employees" of Disney.
• Disney's hosting of "Gay and Lesbian Day" at Disney World
in Orlando.
The Presbyterian Church in America passed a similar though
much shorter statement against Disney during its assembly meeting
in Coral Ridge, Fla. The one-sentence declaration adopted by the
meeting of 2,000 PCA delegates said: "We abhor what Disney and
other corporations do to promote the homosexual lifestyle."

P.O. Box 562,

TRAVERSE CITY,

MI 49685-0562

YES, I want to be a supporting member of the Friends North Organization
D Single : $15.00
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DI am New to the mailing list. D I am already on mailing list. D Note my new address. D Please remove me from your mailing list.
The F/N mailing list is confidential and our mailings come in an unmarked envelope.
NETWORKING 45' NORTH

-16-

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

BODIES IN MOTION
TEXACO
2000 Westchester Avenue
White Plains, NY 10650

January 27, 1997

To: Mr. Henry D. Messer, MD FACS
23248 Bonair, Dearborn Heights, Ml 48127
Dear Mr. Messer:
This is in response to your letter of December 26, 1996 to Peter
I. Bijur, which has been referred to me for handling. In the letter, you
refer to the absence of "any mention of gay and lesbian employees"
in Mr. Bijur's letter to shareholders of November 26.
In reply to your concerns, Texaco's policies dictate that
employment-related decisions are to be based solely on job related
factors (i.e. education, skills, prior work experience, performance,
etc.). This principle precludes discrimination of any kind towards
employees or candidates for employment.
As has been our company's practice, one's sexual orientation is
not a factor in determining employment and advancement
opportunities within Texaco. Furthermore, our company's policies
addressing discrimination are consistent with the constitutionally
guaranteed protection as defined in the Civil Rights Act of 1964. Our
policies are also consistent with generally accepted industry practices.
As we have publicly stated, Texaco is creating an Equality and
Tolerance Task Force whose mission will be to undertake a
comprehensive review of all our equal employment opportunity and
affirmative action policies. As the task force reviews suggestions for
how we might strengthen our employment-related policies, we will
consider language that will address the issue of sexual orientation in
our Equal Opportunity Policy Statement.
Texaco recognizes the rights of all individuals to work in an
environment free of discrimination, and is committed to a corporate
culture fully supportive of opportunity and fairness for every employee.
Again, thank you for taking the time to share your concerns with us.
Sincerely,
s/ Richard F. Brenner
President, Human Resources Division

Comment by Henry Messer: This letter in effect soys that TEXACO will do
nothing about gays and lesbians. They hide in the usual rhetoric about the
"Civil Rights Act of 1964" which soys nothing about sexual orientation.

Bay

Business
•
Services
Inc.

© 1997 by the Archaeological Institute of America
For additional information or photos, see:
http://www.orchoeology.org/9701 /obstrocts/indio html

NEW AIDS CASES STABILIZING IN
STUDY

EU -

BRUSSELS (Reuter) - The number of new cases of AIDS in the
European Union is stabilizing, figures released in late January show,
but Spain, Italy and Portugal are still recording increases.
The European Commission said Wednesday that 17,778 new
cases of Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome were diagnosed in
the 15-nation bloc in the first nine months of last year compared to
1995's total of 22,383.
The Commission said intravenous drug use was responsible for
the greatest number of new cases, accounting for just under half. Male
homosexuals or bisexuals accounted for 28 percent of new infections
while 19 percent was by heterosexual contact.
The Commission said also that an increasing number of women
were being infected with AIDS - 20 percent in 1995 compared to
just 12 percent in 1986. Most of the women infected were
intravenous drug users, the report said although some 32 percent had
been infected through sex with drug-using partners.
The report added that Spain, Portugal and Italy were still showing
increases in AIDS infections and this was attributed chiefly to drug use.

d

Office: (616) 941-5748

rr:::::J

Cross Country Ski

LJF~RBUSH CORNER, INC.
• Over 35 km of trails, machine set for both skating and striding from,
beginner to expert.
• Just l /.4 mile east of 1-75 at the Lewiston/Frederic exit (264)
• Performance ski shop, rentals and instruction
• Bunkhouse and two warming areas
• Weekend food service
• One kilometer night ski trail
P.O. Box 327
Dave Forbush
4971 County Road 612
(51 7) 348-5989
Frederic, Michigan 49733

ANDREW L. MITCHELL

Accounting & Tax Service
810-B South Garfield Ave• Traverse City, Ml 49686
NETWORKING 4S'NORTH

One of the world's richest sources of information about the
performing arts in prehistoric times is the painted decoration on the
walls of caves in central India. Stick figures wearing elaborate, spikey
headdresses sway to music, while others dance choreographed steps.
Harpists with erect phalli play for dancers, some of whom are engaging
in homosexual acts. Boys and girls jump about in ecstatic dance, then
sit on beds entwined in each other's arms.
Rock art showing dance and musicianship is abundant in the
state of Madhya Pradesh, particularly in the Vindhya Hills to the north
of the Narmada River, and in the Mahadeo Hills to the south. Here,
early artists created some of the most vivid and dramatic pictures of
people in motion.

-17-

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/APRIL 1997

Human Rights Campaign, from the grassroots up." Red Wing was
instrumental in the defeat of Oregon's anti-gay ballot measure in
1992. As a resu It of her work, The Advocate named her its 1992
Woman of the Year. Simultaneously, her adversaries on the right
proclaimed Red Wing "the most dangerous woman in Oregon."

HRC LAUNCHES FORUM ON AOL
In the Quest to deliver our message as widely as possible, the
Human Rights Campaign has launched its own forum on America
Online, which currently reaches 7 million subscribers.
The HRC Forum is housed in AOL's Politics Channel and sits
along-side The White House Forum, The Capitol Connection,
Congressional
Quarterly,
The
McLaughlin Group, the ACLU and HUMAN
other political forums.
RIGHTS
The HRC Forum provides access
to our award-winning Online Action CAMPAIGN
Center, which enables users to
research issues and send messages to Congress; an ARC News and
Issues area, a Membership and Marketplace mall, a Coming Out
space, HRC Message Boards and an HRC Caucus Room. HRC will
host evening chats on a variety of lesbian and gay and AIDS issues.
The Caucus Room programming schedule is posted on line.
AOL members can access the HRC Forum using < Keyword :
HRC> or from the link in the Politics Channel.

HRC Hires Red Wing to Strengthen Field
Operation
The Human Rights Campaign starts the new year with some new
faces, and some familiar faces in new places. Longtime activist
Donna Red Wing joins HRC as national field director, Winnie
Stachelberg has been promoted to the new position of legislative
director, and Kevin Layton has been named director of the political
action committee and HRC's legislative counsel. Layton will work
closely with Chai Feldblum, HRC's outside counsel.
These changes grew out of the departure of Daniel Zingale,
HRC's political director, to become executive director of AIDS Action
Council. "We were very sorry to see Daniel leave, but he will be a
brilliant asset to AIDS Action," says HRC Executive Director Elizabeth
Birch.
Red Wing, meanwhile, comes to HRC after three years with the
Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation, where she helped
create and manage its training programs in dealing with media,
violence against gay men and lesbians and organizing against antigay initiatives. "We are thrilled to add Donna Red Wing's talent and
vast experience to the staff of the Human Rights Campaign, " Birch
says. "Her abilities as an organizer, public speaker and committed
activist will continue the process of building our movement, and the

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Tipping the Balance of Power
HRC's first foray into state politics proved to be a success as we
helped wrest the California Assembly from the hands of extremists.
The Assembly, which was split 41-39 Republican to Democrat before
Election Day, now promises to be a place where lesbians, gay men
and fair-minded Californians are safer from anti-gay legislative
attacks because of the shift to 43 Democrats and 37 Republicans .
HRC's California Project turned out thousands of volunteers
throughout the state to staff phone banks, participate in literature
drops and get people out to vote on Election Day. Openly gay
Assemblywomen Carole Migden of San Francisco and Sheila Kuehl
of Santa Monica praised HRC for its efforts. "HRC's California Project
played a pivotal role in reclaiming the California state Assembly from
the extremist factions of the Republican Party," Migden said.
"We decided that since so much anti-gay federal legislation starts
at the state level, that we could try a little preventative medicine,"
said Kevin Layton, HRC's PAC director and legislative counsel. "Plus,
the extremists held a very slim majority in California."
Along with HRC's efforts to turn around the Assembly, HRC was
also involved in many federal races in California. Senior Policy
Advocate Julio Abreu worked with HRC members in the Santa
Barbara area to elect fair-minded candidate Walter Capps, who
defeated extremist Rep. Andrea Seastrand. HRC's political action
committee supported many candidates forfederal office in California
including Loretta Sanchez, who defeated the most vocal anti-gay
member of the House, Bob Dornan, and worked to re-elect Rep . Tom
Campbell, a Republican who earned 89 percent on HRC's scorecard.

CHRYSLER PROTESTS BRING RESULT
-A report from Ron Woods

Due to the persistent efforts of the "Campaign For Equal Rights At
Chrysler", Chrysler has added the words "sexual orientation" to the
Corporate "Standards of Conduct". This most recent revision of the
"Standards of Conduct" is dated January, 1997.
Also Chrysler has stated in a letter to fellow activist David F. Reckinger
dated February 20, l 997 that diversity training is currently being evaluated
and that such training would begin "as soon as possible". These steps and
the "memo" from Chrysler CEO dated November 11, 1996, which for the
first time in known history Chrysler uttered the words "sexual orientation",
are positive steps in the right direction.
However, we maintain a healthy skepticism in light of the fact that all
of this movement has only occurred during times of tremendous work,
determination, perseverance and media attention exerted by the
"Campaign For Equal Rights At Chrysler''. Years of letter writing campaigns
and repeated requests produced no movement whatsoever, all progress
has been achieved only when overwhelming pressure has been exerted.
For this reason the sincerity and depth of the commitment to equal rights
must be drawn into question.

Chrysler (continued next page)

NETWORKING 45°NORTH

-18-

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

Chrysler (continued from previous page)
Therefore we would appreciate everyone please doing all they can
to continue to exert pressure by letter writing, phone calls and protests/
pickets and media attention to the work that needs to be completed. We
still must have:
1) A "memorandum of understanding" between Chrysler and the
United Auto Workers (UAW)
2) Effective and substantial "Diversity Training" where we as
employees have input.

·GLAAD NEWS

We would like to thank everyone who has done anything to bring
these changes about. Keep up the good work.
Sincerely, Ron G. Woods,Chairperson, Campaign For Equal Rights At
Chrysler: MichRook@aol.com - 810-545-7699

DOMESTIC PARTNERS LAW SHOWING
UP IN CONTRACTS
Some S.F. vendors quietly signing deals
The first contracts that bring companies into compliance with San
Francisco's ground breaking domestic partners law are quietly being
approved, even as fights with United Airlines and the Catholic church grab
the headlines.
Thousands of companies are trying to figure out how to comply with
the city's unique law that, starting in June, will require anyone doing
business with the city to offer the same benefits to married and unmarried
couples, including registered gay or lesbian couples. Some are already
doing it by offering the benefits.
The Pier 23 Cafe's new long-term lease with the Port Commission has
been approved, as has the Crystal Springs Golf Course operator's new
contract with the Public Utilities Commission. Glide Memorial Church said
it is creating domestic partners benefits. And in the proposed settlement of
a dispute between the city and Tele-Communications Inc., San Francisco's
cable franchisee, domestic partner benefits was not a contentious issue
because TCI already offers such benefits across the country.
"The law is written to give companies flexibility," said Cynthia
Goldstein of the San Francisco Human Rights Commission. "In the first year
or two, we don't expect all contracts to have everything in place, but we
want to see movement toward putting them in place."
It's that position that has created controversy with United, the world's
largest airline, and with the Roman Catholic archdiocese, which has asked
for an exemption for Catholic Charities.

B

l~~I

UNITED AIRLINES TO OFFER BENEFITS
TO PARTNERS
SAN FRANCISCO (AP)-United Airlines has two years to extend
health and other benefits to its workers' same-sex partners, under an
agreement reached with city leaders.
The accord, which the Board of Supervisors unanimously
approved Monday, allows United's $90 million expansion at San
Francisco International Airport.
In June, the city will begin requiring all the companies with
which it does business to offer spousal benefits to their workers
unmarried partners.
The city had said it would not approve the airline's $13.4
million, 25-year lease until it promised to comply with the new law.
Under the agreement, United must develop a spousal benefits
program in the lease's first 20 months.
"San Francisco has long been a leader in the fight for human civil
rights and once again we are setting the standard," said Supervisor
Leslie Katz, who is gay.

ERNIE DAWSON
OWNER

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NETWORKING 45' NORTH

'Ellen' nominated for GLAAD Award
ABC sitcom "Ellen," which may be preparing to bring its title
character out of the closet, is among the nominees for the eighth
annual GLAAD Media Awards, presented by the Gay & Lesbian
Alliance Against Defamation. The awards will be presented at the
media watchdog group's fund- raising banquets next month in Los
Angeles, Washington and New York.
The other TV comedy nominees announced are "Friends, ""Spin
City," "Mad About You" and "The Larry Sanders Show." The drama
series contenders are "Bedtime," "Chicago Hope" and "Relativity."
Nominees for outstanding wide-release movie are "The
Birdcage," "Bound," Flirting With Disaster," "Get on the Bus" and
"Set It Off."
The top limited-release movies are "Antonia's Line," "Beautiful
Thing," "Costa Brava," "French Twist," "It's My Party" and
"Stonewall ."
The daytime drama series nominees are "All My Children,"
"General Hospital," "One Life to Live" and "The City."
The GLAAD Awards recognize "balanced and accurate
representations" of homosexuals and issues that affect them. The wide
range of categories includes TV and newspaper journalism, advertising
campaigns, music, interactive media and even comic books.

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Flowers
-19-

•

Gifts

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aW'

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

IE

0

u

STATE AND NATIONAL HOTLINES

cc IE
LOCAL SPIRITUAL:

Rev. Geraldine Colvin & Rev. David Florence
Unity Church, 3600 Five Mile, Traverse City .. . .... . .. 616-932-9587
Rev. Emmy Lou Belcher
Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of Grand Traverse
6726 Center Rd., Traverse City-Home: 938-9078 . .. Office: 947-3117
Rev. Nancy Hayward, Circle of the Sacred Earth . .. . . ... . 616-223-7999

Department of Justice Hotline (for reporting
Hate Crimes against gays and lesbians) . . ......... . 800-347-HATE
Michigan Wellness Networks ... . ... ... ... . ... . .. . ... 800-872-AIDS
Gay/Lesbian National Youth Hotline .... .. ..... .. . . .. . 800-347-TEEN

STATEWIDE SERVICES
SOCIAL I POLITICAL / MEDIA

LOCAL COUNSELING:
Third Level Crisis Intervention, ....... . .... . . . ..... . . . 616-922-4800
1022 E. Front St., TC, Ml 49686 ..... .... .. . .. . . and 800-442-7315
Women's Resource Center . . ... . .. .. . . . .. .. .. .. .. . . . 616-941-121 O
Rodger Landvoy, PHO ..... . . . . ... .. .. .. .. . .. . . . .. . 616-929-1711
Susan Breuer PHO (Frankfort/ Traverse City) ... . . ...... 616-352-4261
Margo Million, ACSW .. ............. .. . . . . .. .. .. ... 616-947-0511
David Blisk (Maple City) ..... . ...... . .. ... ..... . . . . . 616-228-5105
Joanna T. Lauber, MA, OTR, CHt ....... . . . .. . .... . ... 616-947-8842
Barbara Jones Smith, PHO . . ... .. . . . ............. . . . 616-947-1444
Elizabeth Most, MSW, ACSW (Petoskey) . . . .... . .... . . . 616-439-0656
William D. Gould, MA (Gladwin) . . . .. ..... . ....... .. . . 517-426-2351
David Rushlow, ACSW, Munson Medical Center ..... . ... 616-935-6385
Bay Area Counseling (Petoskey/Harbor Springs)
Margalo Bley, MSW, ACSW ....... .. ... . . . . . . ... .. 616-348-3616
Daniel C. Doran, PHO, CSW . .. . . . . ................. 906-635-9263
Lois Martindale, Ph.D., Benzonia . .. . ..... .. .. .. . . .... 616-882-5888 '
CDRS (a free substance abuse referral agency)
808-A S. Garfield, Traverse City .... . .... . 929-1315 or 800-686-0749

The Network: Lesbian and Gay Community Network of W. Michigan
909 Cherry St. S.E., Grand Rapids, Ml 49506 ..... . .. . 616-458:3511
Lavender Morning
P.O. Box 50729, Kalamazoo, Ml 49005 .. .. . ..... . ... 616-685-6061
Kalamazoo Resource Center
P.O. Box 1532, Kalamazoo, Ml 49005 . .. . . .. ...... .. 616-345-7878
Affirmations Lesbian/Gay Community Center
Suite 110, 195 W. Nine Mile Rd.
Ferndale, Ml 48220 .... .... .. .. .. . .. . . ... . ... . .. . 810-398-7105
http://www.webspace.com/-tcc/affirmations/index.htme
Lansing Association of Human Rights
P.O. Box 18062, Lansing, Ml 48826 .. .. . . .. .. ...... . 517-332-3200
e-mail . ... .. . . ..... . .. . . .. .. . . .. . .. .. . . .. lahr@macatawa.org
Lesbian Connection
P.O. Box 811, East Lansing, Ml 48826 .... . . .... . . . .. 517-371-5257
Triangle Foundation (Lesbian/Gay Foundation of Michigan)
19641 W. Seven Mile Rd., Detroit 48219 . . .. .. . .. . . .. 313-537-3323
. .. .. .... ... . . . ..... .. .. ........ .. .. .... . Fax: 313-537-3379
email . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . trijeffm@aol.com
Between The Lines (newspaper/monthly) ...... .. ... .. . . 810-615-7003
33528 Eight Mile, Ste. 185A3, Livonia, Ml 48152 . .. FAX 810-615-7018
e-mail . . .... ... . . . . . .. .. .... . .. . .. ... .. .. pridepblis@aol.com
The Third Coast (magazine/monthly) .. .. . .. . . . .... . . .. 616-451-4903
1322 Hurd, SE, Grand Rapids 49506 . . ... . ...... FAX 616-451 -0915
e-mail ... . . .. . .. ......... . .. . . .. .. .. . . . . lllrdCoasst@aol.com

LOCAL SERVICE / SOCIAL I POLITICAL

NATIONAL SERVICE / SOCIAL I POLITICAL
P-FLAG: Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays
101214th St. NW, Ste. 700, Washington, DC 20005 ... . 202-638-4200
GLAAD: Gay/Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation
BO Varick St., #3E, New York, NY 10013 . . . .. .... .. . . 212-807-1700
....... . .. . .. . ...... . .. ... .... . ... .. ..... Fax: 212-807-1806
email ... . . . .. ..... . . ...... . ..... . ....... . . glaadnatl@aol.com
National Gay and Lesbian Task Force ... . . . .... ..... . . 202-332-6483
2320 17th St., NW, Washington, DC 20009 .. . .. .. Fax: 202-332-0207
Lambda Legal Defense and Education Fund ..... . . 212-809-8585 x 205
120Wall St., NY, NY 10005 . . .. . . ..... . . .. . .. . Fax: 212-890-0055
ACLU Lesbian/Gay Rights Project
1370 Mission St., San Francisco, CA 94130 . . . ....... 415-621-0674
HRC: Human Rights Campaign (National Coming Out Day)
101214th St. NS #607, Washington, DC 20005 . .. .... 202-628-4160
.... . .. . .. . . .. ... ......... .. . ... .... .. ... Fax: 202-347-5323
e-mail ....... . ... .. .. .. .. . . ...... .. . .. , .. .. www@hrcusa.org
Gay and Lesbian Victory Fund, Political Action Committee
101214th St. NW #707, Washington, DC 20005 . .. . ... 202-842-7679

NElWORKING 45 °NORTH

JR

Friends North (information line) .............. . .. . .. . . 616-946-1804
Common Voices - F/N Rap Group ... .. .... . . . . . .. .... Ed - 947-4697
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Tom - 275-6127
Windfire Gay & Lesbian Youth Support GroupCall Third Level for location & time ... . ......... . .. .. 616-922-4800
or ... .. . .. . .... . . ....... .. . . . . ... .. .. .. .. . .. .. 800-442-7315
Side Traxx Nite Club, 520 Franklin St. off of 8th St. . . .. . . . 616-935-1666
Traverse City Human Rights Commission, 400 Boardman . 616-922-4700
Gay Alcoholics Anonymous,
Grace Church, Washington at Boardman, TC . . . . John 616-922-0746
P-FLAG, Traverse City, POB 1705, Acme, Ml 49610 . Cindy 616-271 -5045
GLSTN (Gay/Lesbian/Straight Teachers Network)
PO Box 9, Traverse, Ml 49685 . . .. . . .... .. . .... .... 616-943-8800
NOW (National Organization for Women) Gail Trill .. . .. .. 616-938-1333

LOCAL HIV/ AIDS HEALTH COUNSELING:
HIV/AIDS Wellness Networks, GTA, Inc., ......... .. .... 616-947-1110
P.O. Box 1632, Traverse City, Ml 49685 . . ... ... . .. 1-800-494-1160
Business Office .... ........ . . . . . .. ... ......... .. 616-933-0279
HIV/AIDS Wellness Networks - HIV Support Group and
Family and Significant Other Support Group . . .. . . . ... 616-947-1110
Thomas Judd Care Center, 1211 W Front St., Traverse City,
Mary Dillinger, RN, Clinical Nurse Specialist ....... ... 616-935-8140
David Rushlow, ACSW Social Worker ..... .. . . . . . ... 616-935-6385
H.A.N.D.S. (HIV/AIDS Support: Petoskey) .. .. .. . . .. . . 1-800-248-6777
Community Health Clinic ...... ..... . . . ... .... . .. .. . . 616-929-4448
(anonymous counseling/testing; same-day results no fee)
Northern Michigan Planned Parenthood . .... . . . ........ 616-929-1844
(anonymous counseling & testing)
Grand Traverse County Health Department . . . .. .... .. . . 616-922-4831
(anonymous HIV Testing Center)
Emmet County Health Department (Petoskey) . . . . . . . ... . 616-347-6014
Also call the District Health Department in your area
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VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997



THE NEWSLETTER OF FRIENDS NORTH, INC.,

N

E

T

an association of lesbians,

w

0

nd their friends.

R

G

Property of

HERLAND LIBRARY
VOLUME

11

•

ISSUE

2

•

MARCH

•

APRIL

•

1997

transgender population is likely to be our largest minority group.
Learning tolerance and respect for diversity can help free our
community of prejudice and bigotry, and help reduce violence. Our
goal is to create northern Michigan communities where all individuals
are valued and respected.
PFLAG, GLSTN, Friends North and THIRDlevel corporations
The Help and Information Line telephone number in Traverse City:
announce a new, toll-free Help and Information Line.
61 6 / 946- 1804
by M'Lynn Hartwell If outside of Traverse City you may call: 800 / 579-8769
Traverse City-PFLAG, GLSTN, Friends North and THIRDlevel Information About Organizations:
corporations announce a new Help and Information Line to address
Friends North, Inc. is a regional social organization with over 600
individual and family concerns about same-gender affectional members. Friends North offers numerous events and activities
orientation through information, counseling and intervention. Trained throughout the year for individuals who are lesbians, gay men, or
THIRDlevel crisis staff will respond immediately to help individuals
bisexual.
and families cope with the difficulties they encounter as the result of
GLSTN: Gay Lesbian Straight Teachers Network, strives to assure
bias in our schools, family, church and community.
that each member of every school community is valued and respected,
The U.S. Department of Justice reported that "The most frequent regardless of sexual orientation. Through community organizing, public
victims of hate violence today are blacks, Hispanics, Southeast Asians,
Help Line (continued page 3)
Jews, and gays and lesbians. Homosexuals are probably the most
frequent victims."
The National Gay and Lesbian Task Force surveyed 2,000 gays
and lesbians and found that over 90% had experienced some form of
victimization on account of their perceived or actual sexual orientation
and one-in-five gay males and one-in-ten lesbians said that they had
been "punched, hit, kicked, or beaten." Ninety-seven percent of highHIGH TEA
school kids report regularly hearing some homophobic remark; 28
Traverse City Opera House - Sunday, April 27, 1997
percent of gay and lesbian students dropped out of school.

NORTHERN MICHIGAN HELP AND
INFORMATION LINE INSTALLED

FRIENDS NORTH UPCOMING EVENTS

Researchers have found that homosexual youth are at a greater risk
to experience isolation, peer and family rejection, harassment and
violence. They expend considerable energy hiding their "secret" from
friends and family, out of fear of rejection - rejection that often results
in being thrown out of the home and onto the streets. The threat of
physical and psychological damage to the developing gay teen is great,
and our Help and Information Line may be of great value to all
members of the family as they seek understanding. The Help and
Information Line will also assist people of all ages with lesbian or gay
parents, or other family. It is estimated that as many as fourteen million
children come from households with lesbian or gay parents.
Given the generally accepted statistics regarding the proportion of
gays in society, every city, town and rural community in America is
likely to have a significant number of lesbian and gay students,
teachers, parents and other people involved in every area of their
community. In fact, in northern Michigan the lesbian, gay, bisexual and

GAY PROM
May, 1997 - (Date and Location to be announced)

TRAVERSE CITY PRIDE EVENT
June 29, 1997

FRIENDS NORTH BIKE TOUR
August 8-10

AUTUMN HIKE
(Exact Date/Location to be announced)

FALL FILM FESTIVAL
(Exact Date/Location to be announced)

GAY HISTORY AND EDUCATION DAY - OCTOBER, 1997
(Exact Date/Location to be announced)

THANKSGMNG POTLUCK - NOVEMBER, 1997
(Exact Date/Location to be announced)

Richard Tuxbury

Friends North, Inc., P.O. Box 562, Traverse City, MI 49685-0562 (616)
946-1804 (This is a general information line to receive FIN
information.)
FRIENDS NORTH is an organization of lesbians, gay men, bi-sexuals and
their friends from northwestern lower Michigan. Located in Traverse
City, we provide social activities, a newsletter, phone line, workshops,
and a scholarship fund for financial assistance.
THE BOARD OF DIRECTORS of FRIENDS NORTH is composed of nine
women and men elected each December. Regular board meetings are
held at Grace Episcopal Church at the Corner of Washington &
Boardman the first Tuesday of every month at 6:30 p.m. Everyone is
welcome to attend.
Brenda Bartz - 616-946-2708/bbartzstar@aoLcom
Victor Dinsmore, Secretary- 616-459-5759/itsyrigloo@aoLcom
M'Lynn Hartwell - 616-943-8800/les n more@aol.com
Jim Ingleson - 616-922-0925
Carol Lambertson, Pres. - 616-27 5-7102/tclambo@gtii.com
Tom Kincaid-VP - 616-947-4647
Ben Maddy- 616-271-3926/coolj707@aol.com
Julie Parker - 616-276-9330
Sue Schwartz, Treas. - 616-946-3032/tcfriend@aoLcom
NEWSLETTER COMMITTEE: Publication of Networking 45° North.
Editor: Richard Tuxbury: 271-3042
or e-mail: tux0 0 1@ aol. com
Publishing & Layout: Richard Curtis: 616-929-9605
or e-mail: rlc@traverse.com
Advertising: Ric Nelson: 616-933-7116
Mailing List: John Evans: 922-0746
Networking 45° North is the newsletter of Friends North, Inc. Viewpoints
expressed do not necessarily represent those of the board or general
membership.
CLASSIFIED ADVERTISING and notices are run without charge. Please
submit in writing or by calling the editor (and leave ad on machine 2713042 or by email.)
DISPLAY ADVERTISING in Networking 45° North is available in Business
Card size - $25.00 per space per issue or an annual rate of $120.00 for
6 issues. Inserts and larger sized ads are .available. Please call
'advertising' for rates.
SPONSORING POLITICAL POSTCARDS: Cost for printing 2,800 postcards
for Networking 45° North is $100.00. To sponsor all or part of this, and
to give your input, call Richard 271-3042.
CONTRIBUTIONS to Networking are welcome. Letters, essays, features,
reflections, and original artwork should be sent "c/ o Editor" to above
address. (Networking will not accept material that is sexist,
discriminatory or sexually explicit. Contributors are responsible for
obtaining permission from those whose names they submit for
publication.)
DEADLINES: Issue #3, April 15. Issue#4June 15, Issue#5 August 15.
ADDRESS CHANGES: Please notify us in advance if a change is coming.
Call John Evans, 922-0746, or send changes to our address.
SUBSCRIPTIONS/MEMBERSHIPS: $15.00/ single; $25.00/couple. Please
send checks or money orders to: Friends North, P.O. Box 562, Traverse
City, MI 49685-0562.
DISTRIBUTION: Networking is published 6 times per year. Copies are sent
bulk-mail in a plain envelope to approximately 700 households.
Additional copies are available at select local establishments. Our
mailing list is not sold or traded with other organizations.

FROM THE EDITOR
Politically, our new year has gotten
off to a mildly disappointing start.
Many of us wished Bill back in the
White House for another term, and then,
he must have forgotten how much we supported him. He never once
used either the "g" or the "I" words in his State of the Union address.
However, when the Employment Non-Discrimination Act gets
reintroduced this year, Bill has publicly vowed to give it his wholehearted assistance.
On the other side of this presidential administration, Vice
President Gore has expressed an interest in educating himself about
gays and lesbians and recently asked gay leaders for advice on which
books to read. A few were suggested: Before Stonewall, Randy Shilts'
Conduct Unbecoming, and The Celluloid Closet.
Individual states have been busy building barriers to stop the
homosexual marriage menace that will soon invade the mainland
from Hawaii. To date, almost half the states have passed laws that
prohibit the recognition of same-sex marriage, despite the fact that
marriage has yet to be legalized in any state. Hawaii is still wrestling
with the issue, but same sex marriage should be recognized there
sometime in 1998.
Many members of Congress are busying themselves with at least
two unnecessary and self-aggrandizing amendments to our
Constitution. One protects the American flag from being desecrated,
and the other calls for a mandatory balanced federal budget. I worry
that our Constitution can be tampered with too easily if these move
forward . It is then just another step away from their proposing to
outlaw same-sex mariage via another amendment. .. or who knows
what!
Locally, I hope that at least a few people rose early enough to
watch the two-day Rita Melotti (TV 29) show that focused on samesex marriage. Thanks to Guy Molnar, Cindy Robb, Rev . Emenheiser
from Grace Episcopal, and Benjamin Maddy, the gay/lesbian
community had excellent representation and interpretation.
The second day of the show, our state representative, Michelle
McManus, was on the speaker phone during the half hour program .
She defended her support of Michigan's banning same-sex marriage,
and attempted to rationalize how her stand against gay marriage was
also a stand for equal rights for everyone.
Without a hint of sarcasm, McManus proclaimed, "I feel that
Michigan's banning gay marriage is not discriminatory towards gay
men, because heterosexual men are also not allowed to marry." I have
paraphrased, as it was done in typical 'Michelle-speak.' It is opinions
such as this that have earned her a seat on Engler's Michigan's Civil
Rights Commission . Now she has been officially charged to do for all
other minority groups what she has done for gays and lesbians.
We are still looking for contributions, so please consider
submitting your essay or thoughts for our upcoming issues this year. If
you have any questions, please call me. Our newsletter will be much
better with YOU in it!

~

printed on recycled paper
NE1WORKING 45°NORTH

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VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

Help Line (continued from page 1)

Carol Lambertson

advocacy and in-school programming, we are working to end
homophobia and heterosexism in this generation through educating
today's students. We welcome as members any and all individuals,
regardless of sexual orientation or occupation, who are committed to
seeing this philosophy realized.
PFLAG: Parents, Families, and Friends of Lesbians and Gays
promote the health and well-being of gay, lesbian, bisexual,
transgendered persons, their families and friends through
• Support to cope within an adverse society.
• Education to enlighten an ill-informed public, and
• Advocacy to end discrimination and to secure equal civil rights.
THIRDlevel: Provides 24 hour crisis intervention, information and
referral services; youth and family services; short term counseling; and
support groups such as Windfire for lesbian and gay youth.

FROM THE PRESIDENT
I have had many people talk to me about "what
it used to be like" in the Grand Traverse area with
respect to the gay community. Gatherings used to
happen only within the safety of people's homes.
Then some folks got brave and organized dances, first hanging brown
paper on all the windows of the rented building for protection from the
public eye. And who can forget those dark and smokey Den dances?
However, times have changed in our area, albeit slowly. The Den
dances have disappeared, but Traverse City has a gay bar that has
survived. We have a monthly lesbian coffeehouse that has existed for
over three years. There is an expansive and labeled Gay/Lesbian section
in our newest bookstore. Last year the Bay Theater set aside a Sunday
afternoon for a movie to benefit Friends North, and gay issues even get
mentioned in the local press occasionally; though the issues are not
always positive - at least we're not ignored.
In fact, I took a few minutes to quickly list as many of the gay or
gay-friendly people, places and things I could think of, and came up with
quite a slate: Networking 45 Degrees North - our excellent newsletter;
Out 'n About Lesbian Coffeehouse; Weekly Gay M Meetings; The Rap
Group - monthly gay discussion group; The Bookie Joint; The Petoskey
Thursday night dinner group (weekly); PFLAG monthly meetings;
GLSTN meetings; Lesbian Adventures - bi-monthly gatherings; Monthly
Friends North Board Meetings; Wellness Network; Monthly Out 'n
About Coffeehouse Planning Meetings; Gay Book Discussion Group at
Border's Book Store - Monthly; Gay Pride Celebration Planning
Meetings; Newsletter Stuffing Party.
(NOTE: Details regarding most of the above can be found
elsewhere within this newsletter)
This is by no means an all-inclusive list, but I think you get the idea
that if you are looking to either get involved or just meet other likeminded people, you don't have to know the secret handshake. There
are plenty of opportunities.
Some of the above mentioned groups or activities are part of Friends
North and some are not. However, we attempt to cooperate with one
another when planning our various events. Therefore, on January 5th,
1997 the Friends North Board met with representatives from some of
the above groups in a "retreat" setting to discuss common issues and
concerns. The Board asked for input and entertained requests and ideas.
During the latter half of the day, with all guests having departed, the
Board then sketched out the yearly event calendar.
Since we are awaiting confirmation of several locations and dates,
information is incomplete at this time. However, we have placed the
Calendar of Events in this issue in case you are inspired with ideas or
suggestions. We welcome your input and still have lots of planning time
for most of the events - just call the help line, leave your name and
number, and we will call you back.
We will be updating the calendar with each newsletter issue.

COMMON VOICES
Ed Richardson
Exciting things are happening in the Friends North Rap Group.
Please delete "Rap Group" from you brain data base and replace with
our brand new name - "Common Voices." I would like to thank
Alan Williams for suggesting this more reflective name. Alan has also
volunteered to do promotion for our group that welcomes ALL gays
and lesbians-regardless of age-to our monthly gatherings held in
the basement lounge at Grace Episcopal Church, 349 Washington
St. at 7:30 pm on the second Wednesday .
As always, Common Voices offers a safe haven and supportive
atmosphere. Often, there are selected topics and related videos but
there is always time to consider personal problems. Common Voices
has no difficulty being a sounding board. If you are new to our local
gay/lesbian community, Common Voices wants to welcome you! If
you have not been to a Common Voices gathering for some time,
please come back. You are missed! If you know of someone who
needs Common Voices, please encourage them to come. Our
welcome mat is always out- don't knock, just walk-in!
Common Voices will also be gathering for dinner at a local
selected restaurant on the first Wi;dnesday of each month at 7:00 pm.
We want you to join us! Please contact myself (Ed) at 947-4697 or
Tom at 275-6127 for the restaurant choice of the month (or for any
questions about Common Voices.) (There was discussion at the
January Common Voices gathering that the monthly restaurant outing
be entitled "Common Nibbles" - what do you think???

•

..

FRIENDS NORTH BIKE TOUR, AUGUST 8-10

(616) 941-8868

Join us for a spectacular weekend of biking and
socializing in beautiful Leelanau County. Call
Friends North for an information packet."
NE1WORKING 4S'NORTH

'Fax (616) 941-9063
•'Hrs 9am-7ym 'Dai(y • Out

ef town yfione 800-876-8868

1081 S. 'ltiryort 'Road West, 'Traverse City, 'M'l 49686 (Cofonia( Square)

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VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

Out,n

Out 'n About Lesbian Coffeehouse is managed by an informal
gathering of lesbians who are dubbed the "Steering Committee." This
Committee meets for a few hours on the Monday prior to the 3rd
Saturday coffeehouse for planning of each month's event. The
Committee is always seeking input from you, the lesbian community,
about wbat or who Out 'n About should feature in upcoming months.
Please join the Steering Committee so that your ideas can be heard
and so that you can make a positive impact on your own community.
Without your input and assistance the Coffeehouse will not succeed.

+About
A Lesbian Coffeehouse
Unity Church - 3600 Five Mile Road - Traverse City
Call 946-2708 for more information
The Out 'n About
Lesbian Coffeehouse is very
pleased to present to our
lesbian
community
the
passionate,
percussive
rhythms and powerful vocals
of Irene Farrera. Her music is
inspired by the rich culture of
the
South
American
continent, where she was
born
and
raised
in
Venezuela. She has been
Irene Farrera
performing professionally for
more than 15 years. Irene's repertoire includes the contemporary
sounds of Brazil and the Caribbean. She composes beautiful songs
with lyrics in Spanish, English, and Portuguese. She also interprets
songs by well-known Latin American composers. Her work reflects
the essence of the Latin spirit, offering fierce passion, romantic
tenderness, and diverse experience.
Irene Farrera will be on the Coffeehouse stage on Saturday,
March 15. The Coffeehouse is open from 7:00 p.m . until 11 p.m.
Please show your support of a wonderful performer and the Out 'n
, About Lesbian Coffeehouse with your attendance.
In April, the Out 'n About Lesbian Coffee.house is planning a
" Favorite Card and Board Games" evening. Please bring your decks
of unmarked cards for a spur-of-the-moment friendly Euchre match
or a challenging Gin rummy tournament. Also bring any of the
myriad varieties of board games (i.e., Monopoly, Clue, Shoots and
Ladders, Yahtzee, (Lesbian-modified Mystery Date, Trivial Pursuit,
Pictionary, etc.) to the Coffeehouse. It is all happening on Saturday,
April 19, from 7 p.m. until 11 p.m. Prizes awarded to the individual
who is selected by the entire group as the lesbian who best fit the
category, "Plays well with others. "

Out n' About Lesbian Coffeehouse is held on the third Saturday
of each month except August and December. The Coffeehouse
comes alive between 7:00 and 11 :00 pm at the Unity Church,
3600 Five Mile Road, Traverse City. Smoke-free and Chem-free
with a cover donation of $3-5 ($5-$10 if we have entertainment).
Coffee, tea and snacks are free; soft drinks are available.

For more information, or to have your name placed on the Out 'n
About Lesbian Coffeehouse mailing list, call Brenda at946-2708leave message.

BOARD NOTES:
In an attempt to maintain good communication among the Friends
North Board of Directors, the membership and the readers of this
newsletter, we are adding this section to provide you with a synopsis of
what really happens at our board meetings.
We welcome feedback in the form of phone calls, letters to the editor
and attendance at the board meetings. Please let us know if this
information is helpful to you!
On January 7th the Board met for it's first monthly meeting of 1997.
The major points of business for that meeting included:
• Review of our financial report - an excellent job was done by
incoming treasurer, Sue Schwartz. It is summarized below:

•

BANKERS LIFE AND CASUAL IT COMPANY

=
$ 3290.19
Opening Balance as of 12/1/96
Total Revenue
=
$ 285.00
Total Expenses
$ 562 .12
Closing Balance asof 12/31 /96
$ 3013 .07
There was discussion about the ensuing toll-free telephone number
which will be answered for Friends North, PFLAG and GLSTN at
Thirdlevel Crisis Intervention. The Thirdlevel staff will be 'inserviced'
by representatives of Friends North, PFLAG and GLSTN. A contract
will need to be signed, and then service can begin. Anticipated date
is February 10, 1997. (See related article in this issue).

A Trusted Name In Insurance
For Over 100 Years

•

Long Term Care • Medicare Supplement
Income Replacement • Home Health Care
Annuity • Health • Life

We appointed the newsletter editor and publisher. This has to be
done at the beginning of each year and thankfully the same people
- Dick Tuxbury and Richard Curtis - accepted these positions.

•

A policy/procedure was approved, along with an application form
for the Friends North Scholarship fund (formerly known as the
Community Needs Fund). These items are available from our
treasurer, Sue Schwartz, or any board member. A copy is located
elsewhere in this newsletter.

814 S. Garfield Ave. Suite C
Traverse City, MI 49684
(616) 947-4390
S-5205
NITWORKING 45'NORTH

LINDA L. WIKLE
Agent

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VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

•

An introductory letter was approved which will be sent to all
people requesting information about Friends North along with the
most current copy of the newsletter. In the past there was no
consistency as to how this was done.

•

Our bylaws call for the appointment of an Executive Committee
consisting of the President, Vice President and one other board
member. Victor Dinsmoore was appointed by the Board as this
third member.

•

Plans were finalized for mailing renewal letters to members with
lapsed renewal dates. Approximately 300 renewal requests will be
mailed. [Note: at this writing approximately 75 renewals have been
received-thank you!!]. We also approved a special mailing of a
flyer reminding folks of the Winter Sports Party on Feb. 23.

•

have been received so far. There was lengthy discussion about
what to do with names on the list of people who don't respond.
Some board members feel that if people haven't renewed their
membership then they should not receive a copy of the newsletter,
since it costs about $1 per issue. Others feel that everyone should
stay on the mailing list regardless of whether or not they have paid
a membership. We are carrying names from as far back as 1993.
[The renewal date is on the mailing label right after the name].
Further discussion was tabled for future meetings to include the
editor and publisher.

There was general discussion about a request made to the board
during the Board Retreat from a young person who is interested in
establishing a Safe Schools program and a gay/straight alliance in
the high school. The request was for money to assist with mailings,
etc. Since no official bus_iness may be conducted at the Board
Retreat, the item was placed on the agenda for our first meeting.
Our by-laws state that to become a member of Friends North a
person must be 18 years of age or older. Board consensus was that
in order to provide financial assistance to someone, that someone
must be a Friends North member. One board member offered to
have a discussion with our attorney, Madeline Thomas, regarding
this issue. This item was tabled until discussion with the attorney
takes place.

•

The updating and maintenance of the mailing list and database was
discussed. General consensus was that while there is room for
improvement in our current system, confidentiality must be
maintained when considering updated software and the
transference of the existing information. Further discussion was
tabled pending additional information on existing database.

•

New letterhead design was approved.

$ 3013.07
$ 1310.00

$ 490.53
$ 3732 .54

•

The president stated that a notebook of "policies and procedures"
would be started. When a process is identified by the board that
would be best passed on to a new board in writing, it will be
written, submitted for board approval and filed in the notebook.
There is no specific method presently in place for instructing
incoming board members on the business details of Friends North.

•

There was discussion on the results of the recent membership
renewal mailing. Approximately 86 (out of 300+) renewal forms

& LESBIAN BOOK GROUP

Aimee/Sheila McRae/awesome@freeway.net
On the last Monday in March (the 31st to be exact) and every
last Monday of every month thereafter, Aimee from Borders Books,
Music, and Cafe, will be facilitating a Gay & Lesbian Literature and
Studies Book Group. In March we'll discuss "And Say Hi to Joyce"
by Deb Price and Joyce Murdoch. But even if Deb and Joyce aren't
your cup of tea, please come on out and show your interest in the
group so that we may all decide what to read next month, or even
decide if we need two separate groups (one for gay lit, one for
lesbian). Books chosen for discussion receive a 20% discount at
Borders, and we try to just read paperbacks to keep the cost down
and make the book group accessible to everyone.

Financial report:
Opening Balance as of 1/1/97
Total Revenue
Tota I Expenses
Closing Balance as of 1/31/97

The issue of membership in Friends North include persons under
the age of 18 years was tabled as there has not been a complete
response from the attorney.

GAY

Board business at the February meeting included:
•

•

,r - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - ,

HAIR FORCE ONE
SOI West Front Street
Traverse City. MI 49684

502 E. Eighth St. • 616-94 7-1965

For Appointment Call

COPIES • PRINTING • SHIPPING • FAX

941-8255

Joann Ewing • Brian Bensett • Richard Curtis
Mark Lizenby

NETWORKING 4S'NORTH

A DIVISION OF LASER PERFECT PLUS, INC.
-5-

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

Contributions

with a Canadian friend the other night on the phone and he was
telling me about how much his views on homosexuality have
changed over the years. They have changed by educating himself and
meeting gay and lesbian folk. He said putting a face to a name is so
important in reaching out to others.
I'm not sure how we got on the topic but, we started talking about
people having regrets in life. I told him I really didn't have any, as I
think holding on to past mistakes is not productive or positive. He
said he only has one regret in life and if he could turn back the clock
he would. He told me of when he was in middle school and one
sunny day, after lunch, his classmates were outside playing. There
was an effeminate boy who was by himself and often was the butt of
many bad jokes. It was assumed that this boy was gay. Well my
friend in Canada, was dared by his buddies, to walk over and smash
a piece of cake in this boys face. And he did. He said if there was
ever a way to track this guy down and tell him he's sorry, he would
do it. Strange how things always come back to us. Guilt can be a
horrible thing to carry around. I'm glad my friend in Canada has
grown over the years to understand diversity and how important it is
for all of us. I hope he can move on and get rid of his past regret.
Best wishes to the Safe Schools project going on in Traverse City.
If you would like to get some information on this contact, M'Lynn
through Friends North or at GLSTN Traverse City.
Until next time, seek out positive people, influence others and
educate our community. I look forward to writing to you in the next
newsletter.

FROM THE COMMUNITY

NOitS,jOTIINGSAND NEWS FROM THE NORTH
by Greg R. Baird
Hello everyone! Since my last column in Jan-Feb, my life has
been so busy with many wonderful happenings. I found it difficult
to write about one topic this time around as I had so much to share.
So I am mixing a pot of literary soup and pouring it out for everyone
to take a taste.
My last column I had asked people to write me and tell me if they
feel a sense of community in their area and where do they go to find
it. I also had asked if they didn't have that community feeling to write
me and possibly I could hook them up with a group. Well, the mail
has been rolling in, but I'm always looking for more. I am going to
use this information for a future article and also to guide some people
in a positive direction.
*Some people who have responded from the U.P. tell me they
have nothing to do, and that most people either go to a local straight
bar to hang out or attend one of the occasional dances they have in
Canada. Other folks meet for movies or potlucks and some inquired
about the Gay dinner group in Petoskey. (Every Thursday at 7:00 pm
at the Park Garden Cafe)
I had a lovely letter from a lesbian in Traverse City, telling me of
how she finds it hard to meet people in the area. She is older and
would love to find that sense of community and meet other mature
lesbians. Going out for lunch and movies occasionally would be a
lot of fun for her. Now I don't want to play' matchmaker like in
"Fiddler on the Roof", but I would like to direct this lady in the right
direction. Any suggestions would be welcome.
I had the pleasure of meeting and working with Jeanne WhiteGinder, mother of Ryan White, when she came to North Central
Michigan College to give a lecture in October of 1996. She was
impressed by my work in speaking out in support of gay and lesbian
youth and the community I live in . So as Jeannes' guest I am getting
ready to leave in a few days to go to Chicago and speak at The 4th
Annual Ryan White National Youth Conference on HIV/AIDS. I will
be speaking to youths ages 14 to 25 and adult service providers who
work with youth on "Starting a Gay/Straight Alliance in School and
Building a Positive Community." This is a wonderful opportunity for
me and something I have always wanted to do.
Being a positive role model for gay, lesbian and bisexual youth
is something all of us adults should be doing. I am looking forward to
bringing back information on HIV/AIDS, gay, lesbian and bisexual
issues and many other agenda items. If your school or group would
like to have me speak, please contact me. A special thanks to Friends
North and H.A.N.D.S for supporting me in this venture in Chicago.
Have you ever had someone say something to you that was a bit
profound and you couldn't get it off your mind? Well, I was talking

NElWORKING 45°NORTH

DENIALS OF CONSCIOUSNESS
Cindy Robb
Recently, my 21 year old gay son moved home from Chicago.
Benjamin is a del ightfu I young man who was going through some growth
crunches of "what do I want to do with my life," I was happy that he felt
close enough and comfortable enough to go through this growth with
us, his family, and had the guts and confidence to come back to the rural
farm town of Suttons Bay where he grew up and knew too wel I the
homophobic attitudes that exist here.
One day, he was really down and said to me, "Mom, I wish I had all
my school pictures of myself growing up so I could just see how I've
evolved to where I am today." I said, "Follow me." We went to a small
room in the basement, and with a bit of rearranging, I uncovered a very
large trunk. I had not thought about the trunk for many years. It was
packed full of EVERYTHING I had saved of Ben's, his lifetime in a box so
to speak.
We opened it and both sat on the floor cross-legged and began what
would become a long afternoon examining everything from his fifth
grade bug collection, to his baby book, to book reports, school papers,
report cards, pictures, scrapbooks, articles, letters, clothing from special
occasions, and every gift he had ever made for me. We laughed and
laughed until our sides hurt, and then at the very bottom of the trunk was
a plastic bag. I pulled it out and removed from inside, a small tattered

-6-

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

Denials (continued from previous page)

A BROTHER'S STORY

pair of tap dancing shoes. We both just stopped, tears spilling into our
eyes, for these worn tap dancing shoes represented something very deep.
I immediately felt sadness and shame.

Alan Williams
I've known him for over a year now. When we met over the Internet
(via a mutual friend), he was not quite 16 years old-a shy, scared kid who
lived in my hometown in Illinois. We've never spoken on the phone, and
we have only seen pictures of each other, sent over the 'net-but we think
of each other as brothers we wished we had instead of our biological ones.
We even call each other "bro" when we talk over the 'net. He was unsure
of himself, trying to reconcile his strict Christian upbringing with the fact
that he might be gay.
We traded long letters. He would write about how he hated himselfmostly how he hated the idea that he was gay. I would write back about
how being gay is not an easy thing to deal with at first, and how it takes
time to adjust. I would remind him that hating himself didn't make the
journey any easier. "Don't give up hope," I would write, time and time
again. "There are others like you out there. It's just a matter of time until
you find them." He would write to me about his dreams of how much
better life would be when he had a boyfriend. I would write back and tell
him that happiness lay within, not in the arms of a fantasy lover.
He slowly started to change. He stopped hating himself for being gay.
He accepted it, and he acknowledged the frustration of living with parents
who couldn't understand him, and living in an area where being young
and gay was a sure-fire recipe for being bashed. He went from "I hate being
gay" to "I hate being gay where I am ." I wrote to him that a time would
come when being gay and being himself would be one and the same.
"There will be a time and a place," I wrote, "when you will be able to leave
the closet behind ."
Our conversations moved to the Internet Relay Chat. On IRC, I could
respond directly to what he wrote, and even as our friendship grew, he
found over IRC what I couldn't give him. He found other gay teens. He
was no longer alone, but he was stubborn. "There are others like me," he
wrote, "but they're all so far away." At least he'd made a few steps.
Time and time again I worried about him. I would talk to my friends about
him. When I met my boyfriend, he would sit and listen to me talk about my
little brother. He started talking to my brother too, and in time my boyfriend
became my teenage friend/brother's "brother-in-law" and a new confidant.
Another teen came to IRC, and lo and behold, he also lived in my
hometown. My brother was scared to talk to him at first-"What if he's
really a basher?" he asked-so I spoke to the newcomer and found him to
be just what he said he was-another lonely gay teen in need of a friend .
"Talk to him," I told my brother. So they did. It wasn ' t easy at first-they

I think Ben felt badly for me because he knows how much I love him
and how I would never consciously hurt him, and yet here in my hands I
held the evidence to prove my early denial of who my wonderful son really
was and is today. We both knew, without saying a word.
In 1981, Ben was six years old. I was a single mom and I worked three
jobs to support us. I always worked when Ben was either asleep or in
school. That way, he would think I was always home for him. Ben's
interests centered mostly around the arts & entertainment category and I
didn't see any problem with any of it until he came home and asked to
take tap dancing lessons. I remember like it was yesterday thinking, oh,
no, can't you play baseball, or do something more like a "boy." I thought
he'd get teased and he already was really exhibiting "sissy" type behavior,
I never spoke my conscious thoughts, but SAID, "Well, I'll think about it. ..
but I don't know ... "
I was just hoping this whole thing would just go away, but it didn't.
Instead of saying 'no' without a good reason, I simply said, "I can't afford to
pay for tap dancing lessons." I thought the issue was moot, and I felt relieved,
that I could now be more comfortable in my unconscious denial.
Working three jobs and being home during Ben's waking hours was a
trick! I worked the night shift in our local hospital, and on Saturday mornings
Ben was home but I needed to sleep, so he would wake me and tell me of
his plans for the morning, and I would get up around noon. It seemed to me
that he was spending a lot of Saturday mornings with "Brian," one of the
boys on our block, but I was glad they had such a good time together.
Reality slapped me in the face one Saturday morning when Ben walked
in the door a few minutes later than usual, and handed me a pair of tap dancing
shoes and a letter and said "Please Mom, don't be mad." I sat down and
opened a letter from the Meg Nutting School for Dance. Mrs. Nutting and I
knew one another personally. The letter read, "Dear Cindy; I would do
anything not to hurt you and I truly hope this does not embarrass you, but Ben
has been coming to my Studio of Dance every Saturday morning for the past
four months and has shown great interest in taking tap. He just sits and watches
my class so intently and I'd inquired many times as to his interest and he finally
told me you cannot afford to pay for lessons. I have given Ben this pair of tap
shoes for five dollars, and have agreed to give him lessons for one dollar of his
allowance money per week, but I still need your permission."
Feeling very guilty, I gave my permission. It wasn't until eleven years
later, Ben had the courage to finally come out to me so I could face what I

Brothers (continued next page)

had denied all along.
What those tap shoes represent for me today is the commitment I have
to all gay and lesbian youth. I gave my son food, shelter, clothing, my time
and all my love and it was not enough, for he knew i didn't want to know

Carolyn R. Delo

who he really was. Today, through my work with PFLAG, I help other
parents "wake up" far earlier than I did.

Sales and Leasing

As a matter of fact, a few weeks ago, I spoke with a mother who thinks
her seven year old might be gay. That child has a much better chance of

1331 South Garfield
Traverse City, Michigan 49686

growing up healthy, without pain and confusion.
I am committed that my goals for public education of all youth on gay

Telephone 616-941-0770
FAX 616-941-8145
1-800-942-4 724

& lesbian issues, will become a reality in my lifetime.
Opening that old trunk that day was no accident. As we walked up the
stairs, I turned to Ben and said, "Now do you remember who you are?" and
he simply smiled and said, "Thanks, Mom."
NETWORKING 45°NORTH

-7-

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

Brothers (continued from previous page)
liked each other, but each thought the other was disinterested. I became
the facilitator, counselor, and pillar of support. I relayed messages, lent the
not-so-occasional virtual shoulder, played cheerleader, smacked the wall
in frustration, talked to my boyfriend for hours on end about everything.
Over time, the fri'end I cared for like a brother, and the newcomer whom I
saw as a friend now, started to open up to each other.
Which naturally meant a monkey wrench would enter.
I got a call from my boyfriend. He asked me to get on line to talk to my
brother. When I arrived on IRC, I got the news: The newcomer's parents
had discovered their son's secret. They were thinking of throwing him out
of the house because they didn't want any "queers" living under their-roof.
My first thought was a last resort. If my new friend was thrown out of
his house, I would take him in. It was a first thought because it would mean
he was safe; it was a last resort because I couldn't stand the thought of the
two boys being separated by hundreds of miles. My brother became his
friend's pillar of support; they would talk to each other on the phone, and
then my brother would come online for advice and a listening ear. I saw
my brother become a strong young man, with a big heart and a developing
real love for the teenager with whom he'd shared so much. It made me
wonder how someone not even related to me could be so much like me,
for he was responding to his friend the same way that I had responded to
him-answering the call of someone who was hurting.
I was so proud of him.
Things calmed down. No one was kicked out of his house. Things
began to turn around, and on Valentine's Day, the two boys met for their
first date, bringing with them all the feelings that had been growing
between them, as well as their feelings about being gay. Afterward my
brother wrote to me. "I can actually say," he wrote, "that today was the
first day that I was proud to be gay, and felt good about it. I can now
realize how normal being gay is and that I like that I am." He told me
that what had helped, besides the date, was the issue of XY magazine (a
magazine for gay youth) which I had sent to his friend, and which he had
received from his friend that night.
I smiled as I read the screen. My brother was finally accepting himself.
He wrote to me again, of a chance meeting the next day with his nowboyfriend. He told me how good it felt to be in each other's arms in a long
hug, and how much he felt for his new boyfriend. "I haven't told him yet,"
my brother wrote, "but I think when I get done talking to him tonight, I'll
tell him that I love him. Because I really do." In the time that I have known
him, this unofficially-adopted little brother of mine has gone from a shy,
scared kid to a young man who has faced his fears and come through them
with love in his heart, and someone to share that love with.
I couldn't be prouder if he were my own brother.

AFFIRMING CHRISTIANITY
by Linda Wilson
This article is in response to various articles that have appeared in
Networking 45° North in the past in reference to "spiritual" or "religious"
concerns. I offer the following as one viewpoint of an evangelical
Christian Lesbian.
Having learned how easy it is to misunderstand what someone is
saying due to the lack of a definition of terms, let me define what I mean
by "evangelical" and "Christian" (I am assuming I do not need to define
"lesbian!").
By evangelical I am referring to the belief that the Bible is the Word
of God, that there is, in fact, a God who has revealed Himself through
Jesus Christ, that Jesus Christ is the One through whom one finds eternal
life and forgiveness of sins, and that one can have a personal relationship
with this God by accepting the life that Jesus Christ has offered. In the old
fashioned terminology, one can, indeed, be "born-again" to a fulfilling
spiritual life by choosing to follow the Jesus Christ of the Bible.
By Christian I am referring to those who claim to follow the Lord
Jesus Christ and who live their lives with the purpose of seeking to know
Him better and to live according to the principles set forth in the New
Testament. "Church" refers to those who have chosen to believe in and
follow Jesus Christ as the "Savior," whereas "church" refers to
denominations.
Fundamentalists are those who believe that they hold all truth in
their group, and feel they have an obligation to keep the faith as they
define it, pure and undefiled by any opinion that might differ from what
they believe to be true. They cite Old Testament stories of "God" telling
Israel to stomp out the enemies and to maintain themselves as separate
and distinct from the surrounding peoples, as evidence and authority that
today, as the Church of god, they must eradicate the "opposition" which,
in one instance, happens to be us!
It is important not to react in like kind to the type of angry, irrational
behavior that the churches have demonstrated towards the gay and
lesbian community. My own mother supports the OCA in Oregon and
subscribes to both Pat Robertson's and James Dobson's literature. She is
such a sweet person in so many ways, but she has never taken the time
(nor does she have the inclination), to study any other possible biblical
interpretation than the one she has heard in her church and in the
literature she receives.
There are thousands of examples that one could find to prove the

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VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/APRIL 1997

point that some will never take the time to listen to a differing opinion.
This may be a fault of the church, but it is certainly not the fault of the
Church. Those who are truly part of the Church recognize that they do
not hold all truth in their hands, and that there just might be something
outside of their knowledge that is, indeed, truth.
For me, any truth is from God because I start with the premise that
God is pure truth, pure love, etc. However, because of the deep hurt that
has been caused by those who call themselves Christians, especially by
those who call themselves evangelical Christians, it is necessary to write
an article such as this one. Why? Because I too am an evangelical
Christian who is so deeply committed to Jesus Christ.
I cannot conscientiously be a part of any of those groups because
they have a flaw in their understanding of the Bible that does not permit
one to be committed to Jesus Christ and be called an evangelical
Christian, and be gay or lesbian!
However, it is an entirely inappropriate response to turn away from
the truth of the Bible and the meaningfulness of a relationship with Jesus
Christ and the power of the Holy Spirit to grow in that relationship,
simply because the church has problems. Yes, I have trouble with
churches. No, I do not have trouble with Jesus Christ. Nor do I have
trouble with the Bible as my sole source of information about Jesus
Christ, and the principles for living as explained in the New Testament.
I am unable to live completely that which I fully understand, let alone
worry about those parts I do not!
I wish everyone who loved and followed Jesus Christ would
demonstrate by their tolerance and understanding, His attitudes and
attributes. I wish I could do that completely . But I am imperfect and
working on areas of my life that need to be healed, transformed,
stretched, and much more. The experience I have with Jesus Christ is so
much more precious and meaningful that the obvious hatred and anger
of others who claim to know Him, that I hold on to my faith and ask that
He would somehow touch their lives. However, to turn from my faith
because of the inconsistency, mean-spiritednes, and error of a large part
of "Christian" churches, would be no different than not taking advantage
of many things that are good for me but are abused by others (i.e., motor
vehicles, medicine, sex, food, love, government, religion, etc.)
When I was in the church, I heard accusations that we were
intolerant and unloving towards those who were "pagan." Now that I
am outside of the church I find that those who are not Christians can be
intolerant and unloving as they claimed the church was. My choice of
my faith, my personal relationship with Jesus Christ, and my belief in the
Bible as God's Word, deserve to be respected by those who do not agree

m
,f

with me in the same manner as they wish for me to be respectful of their
choice to believe or not believe in something of their own. I do not follow
my faith blindly, nor with a lack of intellectual integrity. I do not choose
to be an evangelical Christian oblivious to the sickness that pervades so
much of traditional church life these days. I study profusely to come to
the conclusions that make up the meaning in my spiritual life. And I am
at peace.
If there is enough interest to do so, I would gladly provide a study of
different passages in the Bible to show that they are being interpreted in
light of what some groups wish to have as their agenda against gays and
lesbians. The reality of both history and church history proves them
wrong, as well as do the actual words used in the Bible that today are
translated as "homosexual."
No where does the Bible specifically condemn loving, same-sex
acts. Also, the words that could have been used, had the writers wanted
to specify "loving same sex acts," were not used - neither in the Old or
New Testaments. The major "proof" Scriptures are Leviticus 18:22 and
20:13, Genesis chapters 18, 19, and 20 which recount the story of
Sodom and Gomorrah, Romans 1:16-32, I Corinthians 6:9-11, I Timothy
1:9-10, and the book of Jude, verse 7.
Not one of these passages in the Hebrew Old Testament, Greek
New Testament, or Greek Septuagint, uses the words that were
commonly used to signify homosexual. None of them is used to define
homosexuality as sin. Obviously, if the actual word for homosexuality is
not even used, then it follows that it is impossible for it to be classified as
a sin from these Scriptures. If God hated homosexuals and homosexuality
(loving same-sex relationships) so much, one would think, (since He is
believed to have inspired the writers) that He could have at least used
the words that everyone in that time and place understood to mean
homosexuality. However, He did not. That is a highly significant fact.
There is more. It takes a long time to discuss all the ramifications of
condemning homosexuality because many other traditional beliefs (i.e.,
the belief that marriage is principally for the purpose of procreation, the
purpose of the Law, etc.) have to be dismantled one by one to come to
the truth of the Bible.
To conclude for now: if you were, or are, a Christian and gay or
lesbian, and would like to follow your faith with joy and peace, rest
assured you certainly can! You are a great and wonderful creation of a
loving Creator. He made us, and He loves us.

Linda Wilson , BS, MA, DD is a practicing massage therapist
in Suttons Bay, Michigan, an instructor at Kirtland Community College, and
presently is seeking ordination.

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VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

TI IF TI IE D

IL A
(Note: All classified announcements as well as personals are run without
charge. Please submit them in writing to the Friends North address, or
call the editor (616-271-3042) and leave the advertisement on the
answering machine along with a contact phone number)

NEW ANNOUNCEMENTS
VOLLEYBALL!: Anyone interested in playing volleyball at the 1998 Gay
Games in Amsterdam, please call to discuss. Contact Bill at 616-845-5220.
(issue 4)
GLSTN - Traverse City: The next scheduled meeting is March 17th at 7:00
pm, at Third Level on Front St., in TC, and the featured speaker will be Greg
Baird, from Petoskey. Greg has just returned from the Ryan White
convention and will have a lot to share with the group. All are welcome!
Contact M'Lynn at 943-8800 (issue 2)
GAY-LESBIAN BOOK DISCUSSION GROUP is meeting monthly on the first
Tuesday of each month, 7:30 pm, at Border's Bookstore on S. Airport Rd.,
T.C. For info, call Border's at 933-0412 and ask for Joe. (issue 4)

ON-GOING ANNOUNCEMENTS
GAY GAMES IN 1998: Team Great Lakes is organizing for the upcoming
games in Amsterdam, scheduled for August 1-5, 1998. Those interested,
please call Ann Heier at 810-547-4692. Team Great Lakes sent 180
individual athletes and teams to New York City in '94. (Issue 6)
BI-MONTHLY, Bl-SEXUAL, WOMEN'S LUNCHEON: Meet the first and third
Tuesday of each month, from 11 :30 am until 1:00 at a local, Traverse City
restaurant Call Pamela at 922-0734 or contact Friends North. (issue 2)
PLEASE SPONSOR OUR POSTCARD PROJECT: They do make a difference!
The cost for printing the 2800 postcards is $100.00. To contribute specifically
to the Postcard Project, please call Richard at 271-3042 or send a check (in
an amount of $100.00 or less) directly to Friends North. (issue 4)
QUESTIONS ABOUT HIV AND AIDS? Call locally 24 hours a day to 9471110. This program is sponsored by the HIV/AIDS Wellness Networks Grand
Traverse Area and is staffed by Third Level Crisis Center volunteers. (Issue 6)
THE UNITARIAN UNIVERSALIST CONGREGATION OF PETOSKEY is
meeting at the Concord Academy, 2230 East Mitchell St. Services will be
held on alternate Sundays with dates disclosed in their newsletter, Diversiti.
Please call 348-3117 for details or write to us at POB 271, Petoskey, Ml
49770-0271 (Issue 6)
REPORT HATE CRIMES!! The Triangle Foundation of Michigan has begun a
VICTIMS' PROGRAM COMMUNITY WATCH COALITION. The group will
collect hate-crime information from Lesbian and Gay victims of such crimes.
For details, call 313-533-1166 or 51 7-753-9823. Report Hate Crimes! Stop
the Violence! (issue 6)
GRAND TRAVERSE COUNTY HEALTH DEPARTMENT: Their Reproductive
Health Clinic is open to women and men of all ages. Confidential services
provided are physical exams, HIV counseling and testing, pregnancy testing,
sexual transmitted disease testing and treatment, all methods of birth control
available, FREE Norplants, Depo-Provera, IUDs, and Condoms. For more
info about these and other methods which are charged on a sliding fee scale,
call 922-4630. Services are by appointment only. (issue 6)

PERSONALS:
ROOMMATE WANTED for shared housing. Private room with cable,
laundry, for $21 0lmonth. Phone 935-3749 (issue 2)
GWF-Age 51, shirt and jeans woman .. . loves good company, long Sunday
drives, country music, nature, picnics, camping, and much more. I am
honest, sincere, caring and romantic. Looking for a good close friend and
possibly more, so any singles out there, please write. I will answer all.

NflWORKING 45°NORTH

-10-

Sharon, 8595 N.E. Limits, Mancelona, Ml 49659 (issue 2)
GWF-43, Never married. Looking to meet new friends; soon to have new
location-hopefully real soon. Redneck town's not for me after six years
moving back home from the city. Time to move on and out. Write to: Vickie
Gliech, 17768 S. Tilson Rd., Rudyard, Ml 49780. Relocation upon finding a
new residence and the sale of the current residence. New job location with
Restaurant Mgmnt. as profession. Send name, address and or phone number
and I will respond. (issue 3)
ROOMMATE WANTED TO SHARE 3 bedroom home in north T.C. Person
must like animals, nonsmoker; close to lake, washer/dryer, large yard.
References and Deposit: Shelley 946-1085 (issue 2)

GROUPS:
FRIENDS NORTH BOARD AND MEMBER MEETINGS: The Friends North
Board meets on the first Tuesday of each month at 6:30 pm. at their NEW
LOCATION at Grace Episcopal Church, corner of Washington and
Boardman Streets, across from the Old Courthouse. ALL ARE WELCOME,
(issue 1)
COMMON VOICES-FRIENDS NORTH RAP GROUP is a group of men and
women who get together monthly for informal discussion, often on a
particular topic. Please join us on the 2nd Wednesday of every month at
Grace Episcopal Church, 349 Washington, T.C., at 7:30pm. For information,
call Tom at 275-6127 or Ed at 947-4697. (issue 2)
GLSTN, the Gay-Lesbian-Straight Teachers Network, is meeting the third
Monday of each month at 7:00 p.m. at Third Level, 1022 East Front Street,
Traverse City. They welcome all interested educators. For more information,
call M'Lynn at 943-5050. (issue 6)
P-FLAG: (Parents, Friends and Families of Lesbians and Gays.) This is a
network of parents, friends, and families of lesbians and gays who meet
monthly to offer information, support, and a place to talk with others about
the issues concerning them. Gays and Lesbians are also welcome and
encouraged to attend P-FLAG meetings. Meet at Grace Episcopal Church
every third Wednesday of the month, at 7:30 pm. For more information call
Cindy Robb at 271-5045 (Issue 4)
WINDFIRE: This is a local youth support group for teens and others under
the age of 25, which meets on a weekly basis in an atmosphere that is
comfortable and friendly. Please contact Third Level at 922-4800 or 1-800442-7315 for location, date and time. (issue 2)
OUT 'N ABOUT is a lesbian coffeehouse featurrng entertainment as well as
a chance to meet others from the area. It all happens at the Unity Church,
3600 Five Mile Rd. in T.C. Please see the Out 'n About calendar elsewhere
in this newsletter for times and specific activities. (issue 2)
TRAVERSE CITY FRONTRUNNERS If you are interested in running, call Paul
or Jim at271-4510 and leave your name, number, and that you are interested
in Frontrunners. We will return your call with information on where to meet.
All ages and abilities are welcome. (issue 4)
WELLNESS NETWORKS SUPPORT GROUP is for people with HIV or AIDS
and they welcome you to attend. Please drop in Monday evenings from 6:00
to 7:30 pm at the Grace Episcopal Church library at 341 Washington in
Traverse City. Every fourth Monday of the month the Significant-Other
Support Group will be meetingat3301 Veterans Drive, Suite 221, just north
of S. Airport Road. For further information, please call 933-0279. (issue 6)
THE PETOSKEY GROUP: A social group for lesbian, gay and bi-sexual
persons is meeting weekiy in Petoskey. The group meets at 7 p.m. Thursdays
at the Park Garden Cafe on Lake Street. For information please contact Tim
at 348-8151 (issue 3)
NORTHERN MICHIGAN WOMYN'S CHOIR is always looking for new
voices. To obtain more information or for a performance schedule, please
contact Deb at 275-5924. (issue 3)
H.A.N.D.S is an HIV/AIDS Network located in Petoskey. They are currently

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/APRIL 1997

FRIENDS NORTH SCHOLARSHIP FUND
As mentioned in the President's Column, the Friends North Board recently developed and approved a policy/procedure
and application form to access the Friends North Scholarship Fund (formerly known as the Community Needs Fund). You
will recall that part of each membership fee is designated to help maintain this fund, as well as other donations which are
specified to go into this account. This fund is yet another benefit of becoming a member of the organization! Contact any
board member or call our phone line to receive an application.
FRIENDS NORTH, INC
SCHOLARSHIP APPLICATION

FRIENDS NORTH, INC
SCHOLARSHIP FUND

Application Date: _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __

POLICY/PROCEDURE

Applicant Name:

POLICY:

Address:

Phone:
Are you a current Friends North Member:

Yes

No

Verified by:
(Board Member)

Friends North, Inc., shall maintain and administer a
scholarship fund available to members in good standing of
Friends North. Monies for this fund shall be collected from
donations, a percentage of membership fees, and Board
approval of gener"l operating funds. These funds are to be
used specifically for gay/lesbian/bisexual/transgender
educational pursuits.

Amount Requested:
Needed by:
(date)
Total Fees (if different from above amount:
Event Title: _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __
Event Location:

-----------------

Event Date: _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __

Mail to:
Friends North, Inc.
PO Box562
Traverse City, MI 49685-0562

PROCEDURE:
1. Application is made by any member of Friends North
to any member of the Board of Directors.
2. A majority of the Board of Directors must approve
the scholarship request (in quorum) at the next
scheduled Board meeting. (At the discretion of the
President of the Board, this may be done in an
informal meeting, i.e., phone, via fax, e-mail, etc.)
3. A maximum scholarship of $100 or any portion
thereof may be awarded.
4. Scholarships are limited to once per year per member.

Received by: _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __
(Board Member)
Approved: _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __
(Board President or Designee)
Approval Date: _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __
Check No.:

-----------------

Date Check Mailed to Applicant:

Treasurer's Initials: _ _ _ _ __

5. Scholarships are awarded on a first-come, first-served
basis as funds are available.
6. Scholarship recipients are required to report to the
Board (oral or written) within sixty (60) days of the
event date.
7. The Board of Directors may, with a 2/3 majority of
the full Board, direct a larger amount than the
maximum to be awarded.

ALBRECHT & JENNINGS ART ENTERPRISES
3546 Woodland Trail
Williamsburg, Ml 49690

616-938-2163

MICHELANGELO, MACKINTOSH
and 200ARTDEALERS IN CHICAGO
FRIDAY,MAY9-SUNDAY,MAY11,1997

-----------------------------------------------------DETACH AND S E N D - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

MICHELANQELO, MACKINTOSH and 200 ART DEALERS IN CHICAGO
MAY9-MAY11, 1997
NAME

-------------------------------

ADDRESS

------------------------------

CITY

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -STATE- - - -ZIP- - - - - - - -

PHONE-DAY
EVENING
-------------SINGLE _ _ _ _DOUBLE
TRIPLE_ _ _ _ SMOKING yes no
KING _ _ _ _TWINS
ROLLAWAY_ _ _ _HANDICAPPED ACCESSIBLE yes no
ROOMMATE(S) _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __
We will NOT assign roommates
CREDIT CARD #_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ EXP. _ _ _ _ MC, AMX, VISA, CB, DC
(TO HOLD THE HOTEL ROOM)

NAME ON CARD

----------------------------

Enclose $112.00 (check or money order, NO CREDIT CARDS FOR REGISTRATION) for transportation and museum
tickets. THIS MUST BE RECEIVED BY APRIL 2. NO REFUNDS AFTER APRIL 2. Please pay by check or money
order made out to Albrecht & Jennings Art Enterprises.

SURVEY FOR SPEAKER'S LIST
P-FLAG is compiling a list of persons who would be willing to speak to groups
and\or participate in panel discussions.
From time to time P-FLAG receives a request from a group or organization
asking for discussion concerning our gay\lesbian children and friends and our
relationships to our community.
This is an excellent format Parents and Friends can use to share their
acceptance and appreciation. It is yet one more opportunity for our gay and
lesbian friends and children to share their stories.
PLEASE FILL OUT THIS QUESTIONNAIRE TO HELP US FILL THESE REQUESTS
NAME: _________________________________
ADDRESS: _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __
PHONE: _________

day

evening

TIME OF DAY YOU WOULD BE ABLE TO ATTEND: _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __
TOPICS you would be comfortable discussing:
Parenting- - - - - - - - -

Family Concerns

Legal Issues - - - - - - -

Human

Local Issues- - - - - - -

Myths

Local\National
Local\National

----------Rights
-------------

----------------Statistics
---------------------Opportunities
--------------------

Other:

Comments:

--------------------------------

Information/resources/training are available.
Please contact or send this form to: Penny Smith
10960 Blue Ridge Ln #37
Traverse City, MI 49684
Phone:
(616) 947-4462
E-mail ar967@traverse.lib.mi.us
Fax: (616) 929-5593

seeking volunteers in the northern lower peninsula and eastern upper
peninsula of Michigan. HANDS is a non-profit organization that has
committed itself to helping and supporting the needs of HIV infected persons.
They offer a number of services, including support groups, education, pub Iic
awareness, and one-on-one friendship support. Volunteers are urgently
needed in the Alpena, Gaylord, and Rogers City areas. If you would be
interested in the program, please call 616-526-9213. (issue 6)
GAY ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS: Meetings for gays and lesbians are
held each Saturday at 11 :00 am and have been moved to a new location at
Grace Episcopal Church, corner Washington and Boardman Streets in TC.
For further info, call John at 922-0746 or Tom at 947-4647. (issue 6)
FRIENDS LIKE US: A social group in north east lower Michigan for gay,
lesbian, and bisexual people. Meets monthly. For info, please contact Jeff@
517-354-7702, or write to him at POB 391, Alpena, Ml 49707. (issue 4)

SHARED LETTERS Reactions to the death of Gerry Crane
with thanks to Kathryn Ho/din for submitting

Crane gave so much to world
I knew Gerry Crane. My family and I met Gerry and Randy through
mutual friends, and we consider ourselves fortunate. Gerry was a
decent, kind and honest young man who had a solid, strong
commitment to educating children, to his life partner Randy, to his
family of friends and to God.
He had the courage of his convictions and he didn't lose this
courage or his convictions in what was probably the worst trial by fire
of his -life. This
world needs more
principled people,
more men like
Gerry and Randy
who aren't afraid
of commitments,
who
are
and
willing to stand up
for
what
they
believe regardless
of the adversity
and personal cost.
And what a cost it has been. His smile and his music have left us.
Gerry Crane was an honorable man, and he will be missed, but
he will not be forgotten. His time in this world was too short.
Cheryl Me/lb/om, Grand Rapids.

LETTERS
Thank You,
As one of the two friends who helped Carol at the end, and who
was with her from the beginning of her battle, I deeply appreciate the
comments from Ed Richardson and Gene Strang in your last issue.
Carol was a "people" person, but during her two-year ordeal, she
used all her strength to fight the cancer. Unfortunately that took her
out of the community.
To those who helped over the two years, giving her rides to the
hospital, etc. thank you.
To Ed, Gene & John who saw Carol shortly before her death, thank
you for caring.
On a personal note, to those volunteers and care givers who are
helping a terminally person now or will in the future, I pray God gives
you strength. I never could have imagined how difficult it could be,
emotionally and physically.
Hospice was absolutely wonderful, but we found that nurses,
either the Hospice of privately paid, were not available. Trying to get
some away time was nearly impossible.
Volunteers and care givers are very important, and although its
frustrating at times, and you feel you aren't doing enough, don't
despair. You are helping someone the best, you can. Even if you don't
think that person is aware. You are with them at a time when no one
should be alone. Feel good about yourself for that.
Kathy.

Follow Christ's message of love
I have been following the controversy in the Public Pulse letters
regarding the Byron Center teacher, Gerry Crane.
The anger, sadness and self-righteousness has gone on long
enough to turn everyone's stomach.
If I recall, in the Bible (which so many have taken to thumping so
very soundly) Christ gives us a new commandment to love one
another. I don't recall Him giving us the right to judge anyone. He
doesn't call us to judge-only to love, for love is the fulfillment of the
law. Love does not harm to a neighbor. And we are told that God is a
just judge who rewards the good and punishes the wicked. But we are
not called upon to make that distinction.

L, '-' ,.J

JenTees
customlscreenl printing

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516 E. Eighth St. Traverse City, MI.

Open Monday-Saturday- 6:00 pm - Sunday at 2:00 pm

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Proudl Ga Owned and O rated since 1989

NETWORKING 45°NORTH

-11-

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

Recently a writer to this column compared Byron Center to Salem
and the castigation of Mr. Crane to the witch hunt of the 1600s. Maybe
those who resent being called witch hunters and huntees ought to do
some serious historical study.
For almost 300 years since the "witch trials" the city of Salem has
set aside one day a year for prayer, reflection and atonement for the
wrongs done to those men and women accused, tried, sentenced and
put to death, mostly in the name of envy, greed and self-righteousness.
There's a message and lesson here. Is anyone paying attention?
Jean H. Taylor, Grand Rapids.

Crane's gift was music
Mr. Crane was a wonderful teacher. He taught us how to enjoy
music. In band we played many different kinds of music. He
introduced music from all different types of cultures to us.
The most important thing he taught us was how to really enjoy
music, which was by putting all our effort into playing a piece so it
would be perfect. Also, he taught us that we should never settle for
anything that is less than our best.
I know some people didn't agree with how Mr. Crane lived his
life, but who do they think they are to judge him and others like him?
Mr. Crane was always honest to us and always had us give it our all.
I think Mr. Crane was a gift from God. He helped us so much. He
put his heart into teaching us. Everyone thought he was a good
teacher. It makes me angry how when people found out that he was
a homosexual, they started turning their backs on him.
Doesn't the saying go, "Do unto others as you'd have done unto
yourself"?
Melissa DeMunter, Student, Byron Center High School

T. T . T
•

JUNE

29

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T

.

AT THE ROBB FARM

tfJliJ

~RIDE "GARAGE SALE" Now's THE TIMET
•

T
•

T

•

... to staret collecting Treasures and
Junque for the Pride Sale.
So when spring cleaning
or just tripping over them...

•

T

•

T

Call Jim lngleson 922-0925 to arrange donations •

T • T

tfJlfJP{eltJJIIPf'dl(Jtl• •

Char P. Kirchner,

SECT ADMITS TO BOMBINGS
ATLANTA -A letter purportedly from a group called the Army
of God claimed responsibility for bombings at an Atlanta abortion
clinic and a gay nightclub, and threatened "total war" against the
federal government.
The letter was one of two claims of responsibility for the
February 21st bombing at The Otherside Lounge, which injured
five people.
Federal agents were examining a message left the day after the
bombing on the voice mail of the Phoenix-based Gay Community
Yellow Pages that claimed that the "Sons of Confederate Klan,
S.O.C.K., a new neo-Nazi KKK organization from Los Angeles"
had bombed the club. The message did not mention the attacks
last month on the abortion clinic.
The letter, which the FBI received Monday, promised future
attacks on gays and also sought to set up a system to confirm
claims of responsibility after future bombings.
'We're taking it seriously. We're looking into the validity of
the letter and the claims that they're making," said Pamela
Swanson, spokeswoman for the Georgia Bureau of Investigation.
FBI spokesman Jay Spadafore would not comment on the
authenticity of the letter, which was mailed to The Atlanta JournalConstitution and the Reuters news agency on Saturday and turned
over to federal authorities.
The letter was handwritten in block letters on three pages of
lined tablet paper, the newspaper reported, and said the Sandy
Springs abortion clinic was bombed because of the "murder" of
"3.5 million children" a year.
It said a second bomb that detonated 67 minutes after the first
"was aimed at agents of the so-cal led federal government," against
which it threatened "total war." The letter said Friday's bombing
"was aimed at the sodomite bar."
In Washington, President Clinton told an audience at a fundraiser that everyone must fight hate crimes. 'The recent bombing
of the gay nightclub in Atlanta reminds us that this work is not
over," Clinton said. "We have to stand against those things ."
Authorities are investigating possible links among the
nightclub bombing, the Jan. 16 abortion clinic attacks and the
bombing at the Centennial Olympic Park last summer.

T • T
~

CPA, MSA

>
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0.
0

Tax Returns - Confidential & Discreet

616

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7116

Single Taxpayers - Use your filing status to your advantage
Un-Married Couples - Take advantage of all your options
433 W. 7th

Appointments in Williamsburg or Tra1/erse City
P. 0. Box 1040
Williamsburg, MI 49690-1040
NETWORKING 45' NORTH

St.

Traverse City

(616) 267-5818

Ml
-12-

49684

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

WORDS AND MUSIC: A LOOK AT
BOOKS, MAGAZINES, CD's AND TAPES
Rick Could
Spring is around the corner, last chance for Winter reading.
Here's a list from different book and music stores around our
Michigan area.
At The Bookie Joint, Shelley says they've had such a great
success selling new at 25% off that they'll stay in the new book
business for a while. Also, they have a growing selection of used
books at half the original cover price. This book business is on the
cutting edge these days! Shelley gave us these suggestions:
Too Queer, by Victoria Brownworth, $10.50, save over $3.00.
Brownworth's writing screams "Pay attention!"
Finale, edited by Michael Nava, $8.25. Murder, mystery and the
macabre, chronicled by today's best gay and lesbian mystery writers.
The Alyson Almanac 1997 Edition, edited by Gerry Kroll, $8.98. An
all-new edition of the most reliable book available to the gay and lesbian
community with a cyber guide to lesbian and gay on-line services.
And music: Between the Covers, Cris Williamson and Tret Fure,
Cassette- $9,95, CD-$14.95. Long time musicians and mates, this
duo creates some love-ly music. (Tickets to their May 9 Lansing
concert are available at the Bookie Joint.)
Work Out, the ultimate disc for exercise and dance. Cass.$10.95, CD-$16.95 .
At Borders, Aimee gave us this list:
Stages of Desire: Gay Theatre's Hidden History, by Carl Miller,
$17.95 . Sort of a "Celluloid Closet" for the theatre, Miller's book charts
the history of gay and lesbian representation on stage, from
Shakespeare to the 19th Century. Gives a fresh gay look at many classic
plays and brings forth rediscovered texts with gay or lesbian themes.
1997 Damron Women's Traveler, $11.95 Don't leave home
without this indispensable guide to everything lesbian on the road.
Provides a city by city look at where to stay, what clubs to check out,
special events, and community centers. Great for the girl who is
always on the go.
Funny Time to Be Gay, Ed Karvoski, Jr., $12 .00 Introduces us to
over 30 gay and lesbian comedians who tell their stories and those of
the gay community in ways guaranteed to make you smile, and quite
often laugh out loud. Pokes fun at stereotypes and makes us realize
that life is indeed what you make of it.
At AB CD's, Norm gave us these suggestions:
The English Patient, Original Soundtrack. From the Academy Award
nominated film. This is a guaranteed Oscar winner for best score.
Underworld, Second Toughest in the Infants. Techno at its very
best. This is a can't miss issue that appeared on several "Best of" lists
for the year end in 1996.
Gay Happenings, Volume 4. We loved Volume 1, we like
volume 2 & 3 - so here's Volume #4. Included with this volume is
Alicia Bridges, Hannah Jones and Sin with Sebastian.
Of Rage & Remembrance, Corigliano Symphony # 1, Leonard
Slatkin and the National Symphony Orchestra. Music defined by its
inspiration, signal works from the AIDS era. Symphony, mezzosoprano, Men's Chorus, boy soprano, low strings, timpani and
chimes. This was a Grammy-awarded nominated recording.
NE1WORKING 45°NORTH

Picture This, Jim Brickman. The thirc;J installment from solo
pianist on Windham Hill Records. In its second week of release, it's
already number 43 on the Billboard Charts. Featuring country vocalist
Martina McBride.
At Open Mind Books in Sault Ste. Marie, Dan gave us the
following suggestions:
Meow-mories, by Julia Willis, $6.95. No, it's not the
unauthorized biography of Andrew Lloyd Webber. It's that lesbian
humorist offering a charming, rib-tickling illustrated "baby book" for
cats. Not scotties?
Rainbow Arc of Fire by Greg Sanchez, $11.95. A novel of magic
and enlightenment set amongst the gay community of Colorado.
. Out With It: Gay and Straight Teens Write About Homosexuality,
edited by Andrea Estepa and Al Desetta, $8.00. In magazine format, this
title offers eye-opening insights on how young people view Les/Bi/Gays.
Mythology of Transgression: Homosexuality as Metaphor, by
Jamake Highwater, $23.00. An analytic work that explores how
sexual outsiders create cultural change.
At Waldenbooks, Kevin gave us this list:
Life is Not a Rehearsal, by David Brudnoy, $22.95. When this
conservative talk show host returned to his show after a hiatus, he
shocked his audience with an electrifying monologue in which he
revealed that he was gay and HIV-positive. The overwhelming
~upport he received from an audience not usually tolerant of gay/
issues was an even bigger surprise. Read this memoir.
Best Gay Erotica 1997, selected by Doug Sadownick, edited by
Richard Labonte. $14.95.
Best Lesbian Erotica 1997, selected by Jewelle Gomez, edited by
Tristan Taorimo. $14.95.
Dream Boy by Jim Grimsley, by $11 .00. This novel recounts the
story of first love between two adolscent boys who bravely sustain
each other in a world of domestic disintergration.
Coming out of Shame: Transforming Gay and Lesbian Lives, by
Gershen Kaufman, Ph.D . and Lev Raphael, Ph.D. Now in Paper back
at $11.00. This book exposes the role shame has come to play in the
lives of gays and lesbians, and how to begin a path toward growth
and acceptance.
Sanctuary: A Tale of Life in the Woods, by Paul Monette. Illustrated
by Vivienne Flesher, $16.00. This is the fine author's last work.
At B. Dalton's, several gay periodicals are carried, including
Advocate, Out, and Genre.
These stores appreciate your business and suggestions.

-13-

Activator Method (low force technique)
and gentle manual adjusting
Massage Therapy
Holistic Health & Wellness Educator
814-B S. Garfield• Traverse City, MI 49686
Res: 616-275-2502 • Office 616-933-4424

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

'

NEWS IN BRIEF

Christian Reformed Church in Canada Supports Gays

Henderson Doesn't Discriminate
The City of Henderson has apparently become the first
municipality in the state of Kentucky to publicly state that it does not
discriminate in employment matters based on sexual orientation .
Without public fanfare, celebration or dissent the words "sexual
orientation" were added to the non-discrimination list and to all
employment applications.

Israeli Military Grants Equal Rights to Gay Partner
The Israeli military recently made a landmark decision by
granting the rights of a spouse to the gay partner of a deceased officer.

Cobb County, Georgia Turns Against Past
Bill Byrne, the Chairman of the Cobb County Commission, said
that the anti-gay resolution of 1993 is history. With a new Board as
well as with the push of the Cobb Citizens Coalition, the Board
rescinded the original resolution which forced the Olympic
Committee to ban events from taking place within the county .

Austin Elects Lesbian Sheriff
Austin, Texas, the self-described progressive capital city of a
conservative state, elected the first open lesbian to the post of sheriff.
Margo Frasier, a lawyer and former jail supervisor in Travis County,
defeated her Republican opponent by a four point margin. She also
became the first woman to assume the position .
"People in Austin have a reputation for being a real fair-minded
community," said Kathleen DeBold of the Gay/ Lesbian Victory Fund.
Frasier' s opponent did not use her sexual orientation as an issue in
the campaign, saying that it wasn't relevant.

There is Gay Life in Rapid City
South Dakota' s first statewide organization for g/I/b/t persons
opened offices on Rapid City's Main Street in early February. Space
is provided for a gay library, a community center, and offices for the
group. Nearly 800 books and more than 1,000 periodicals are in the
collection at present.

Anchorage Allows Gay Clubs
The Anchorage, Alaska School Board has passed a final decision
regarding school clubs. They decided to continue allowing noncurriculum clubs, including the Diamond High Gay/Straight
Alliance. An amendment was included, however, to require parental
permission slips be signed-forms which must include the club's
statement of purpose- before a student can be permitted to join. That
amendment passed. This decision effectively ends the debate over
school clubs .

Don't Ask-Don't Tell Upheld
The U.S. Court of Appeals in San Francisco upheld the military's
ban on off-duty homosexual conduct, ruling that the poli cy is
constitutional even though it treats gays and heterosexuals differently.
The decision is the third by a federal appeals court to approve the
Clinton administration's policy on gay and lesbians in the military.
Judge Pamela Rymer said for the court: "For nearl y 20 years, w e have
upheld the constitutionality of the military's authority to discharge
service members who engage in homosexual acts. W e have
concluded that maintaining effective armed forces is indisputably a
compelling governmental purpose and that the policy of excluding
from the military those members who engage in homosexual conduct
is rationally related to that purpose."

Wayne-Westland, Michigan Schools Adopt New
Policy
The Wayne-Westland School Board has adopted poli c ies
banning "discriminatory harassm ent" of employees, board members,
and students on the basis of religion, race, color, nation al origin,
SEXUAL ORIENTATION, age, sex, height, weight, marital status,
handicap or disability. This policy applies to employees, vendors,
contractors or others doing business with the school district, students,
invitees, guests, etc. The new policy was adopted unanimously by the
Board of Education in January.

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Ellen's Big Day Set
According to the February 14 Hollywood Reporter, ABC has
tentatively set April 30th as the date for Ellen to come out as a lesbian .
"The final thumbs-up on Ellen's outing depends on ABC and Disney
executives approving a script, which has not.yet been submitted, "
spies said. Additionally, sources have revealed that Oprah Winfrey
has been approached to play Ellen's therapist.

NETWORKING 45°NORTH

An official body of the CRC in Canada, the Canadian arm of the
Grand Rapids, Michigan-based Christian Reformed Church, has
provoked a firestorm of controversy on both sides of the border. It has
told the Canadian government it supports legislation protecting the
civil rights of gays and lesbians in regard to housing, employment,
and other services. The church also suggested that legislation should
somehow accommodate same-sex partnership, arguing that
"mutually supportive relationships of a private and perhaps intimate
nature other than those understood by the familiar and historic terms"
of family and marriage "should be given a wholly new designation. "
(A more detailed report may be found in the RNS Daily Report,
@www.religionnews.com)

-14-

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pain management
women's issues
childhood trauma
spiritual crisis

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

ESSAY

MCMANUS JOINS CIVIL RIGHTS PANEL
TRAVERSE CITY-State Rep. Michelle McManus, a leading
opponent of "reverse discrimination," has been given the top Republican
spot on the House Constitutional and Civil Rights Committee.
McManus, R-Lake Leelanau, vowed to work for "individual rights"
as opposed to "group rights" in her post as vice chairwoman of the
committee. In the past, she has sponsored legislation to ban preferential
treatment based on gender, national origin, religion, age, height, weight,
familial status or marital status.
"Choosing to support group rights at the expense of individual rights
perpetuates bias and pushes people farther apart," McManus said in a
prepared news release. "I look forward to working on this committee as
an advocate for every resident, and not just a select few."
Her legislation would have affected affirmative action plans of state
and local governments.
The civil rights appointment didn't sit well with Marvine Stamatakis,
chairwoman of the Traverse City Human Rights Commission.
"It is a setback for women, people of color and gays and lesbians."
she said. "I know she is opposed to affirmative action. I've never heard
her make any statements supporting civil rights issues. I feel there is a
valid issue to righting past wrongs."
McManus also was reappointed by the Republican Party to the
revised Human Services and Children Committee and the Conservation
Environment and Recreation Committee.
'

Get Ready for the ...

199 7 MICHIGAN PRIDE MARCH
Bill Beachler, Publisher Cay & Lesbian News, East Lansing
The plans for the 1997 Michigan Pride March are well underway.
This years activities will occur on June 20, 21 and 22, 1997. The
march and festival this year will again be on Saturday based upon last
year' s success. Block these days off your calendar now!
The Michigan Pride Committee has chosen the following theme:
FREE TO BE ... The GLBT community should be free to be happy, free
to be employed, free to be married, free to be home owners, free to
be pregnant and have children, free to be healthy, safe, out, alive,
loved and in love. These are the basic human rights that all people
should have and the equal rights the GLBT community wants.
Based upon 130 couples participating in last year's marriage
ceremony, the Committee hopes to continue the ceremony. Also, this
year the Committee is introducing a few features-the Living SAFE
Project. This project will include issues such as breast cancer, HIV/
AIDS, sexually transmitted diseases, substance abuse and partner
abuse. Based upon the success of last year's beer tent sponsored by
Mill Beer, the Committee is again looking for corporate sponsors.
Finally, the Committee is considering having a community picnic at
the Potter park Zoo on Sunday to include volleyball, canoeing,
biking, roller-blading and barbecuing as well as exploring the zoo.
The bad news last year is that the Committee ended the march in
debt. Therefore, the Committee has become a 501 (c)(3) organization
and is looking for memberships and donations. Checks may be made
payable to Michigan Pride and mailed to P.O. Box 16191, Lansing,
Ml 48901. If you have questions, you may call the Pride Hotline at
(517) 482-8656 or visit the Michigan Pride World Wide Web site at
http://www.myne.com/501 c/michprid/michprid.htm

NE1WORKING 45°NORTH

-15-

Ian Whitney
I have never heard any one state that growing up is an easy
process. If it were, then perhaps more people would attempt to do so.
In any case, growing up is a difficult and grueling road trip that leads
from one state of mind to another, never ending. For the "typical"
straight person, the transition into adulthood is, well, hellish. It is like
driving down a highway on which there are many traffic jams that
one must navigate through in order to reach the targeted destination.
In this analogy then, the road for gay adolescents is more like a
two-track in the Arctic Circle. This road is also covered with jammed
traffic, and in the sections that are one-way, semis with full trailers
speed towards you in the wrong direction . You just have to deal with
it.
I am, in may ways, an exception to the stereotypes that even
people in the older gay community and myself have developed about
gay youth . Or, perhaps I am not. In any case, most of my family (both
immediate and extended) know that I am gay, and they are all as
accepting and supportive as they can possibly be. The initial reaction
of most of my relatives has been, to this point, one that focuses not on
my sexual orientation or behavior but rather on how my sexual
orientation will make my life harder. Overall, however, being gay has ,
not made my life as difficult as the lives of many gay teenagers, and
that is an assumption- I know very few gay youth in this area (they
are there, but not out), and am therefore forced to rely upon
generalizations. I have seen the statistics, but then again, they are only
numbers. Knowing the people is different.
Aside from those at Interlachen (which is my school and another
reality altogether, and unreality but the way that it should be), I know
very few gay youth. I can say, with near confidence, that I know all of
those who are out within the gay community. At the high school in
Traverse City, there are only two "openly" gay people ("openly-" will
admit to someone other than themselves that they are gay), and even
they are somewhat closeted. In Traverse City, especially at the school
level, being closeted is part of everyday existence. I guess that this is
where I am, at most, an exception. I am so far out of the closet that I
can no longer see its entrance. Though this is not something to brag
about, it is nothing to be ashamed of. But it often confuses me.
Honestly, the hardest part of growing up gay is, in my case, being
one of the few "out" people in Traverse City. I often ask myself why I,
at seventeen, am more "out" than people twice or three times my age.
To some in this area, I am the first openly gay person that they know.
I had thought that the closeted part of the gay community was just
insecure, ashamed, or lacking courage. I have come to realize,
however, that those are not the reasons. Stepping out of the closet is
not always the best choice socially, personally, or economically. For
me, life has seemed much easier since I came out. Perhaps not easierit just makes more sense.
Making sense out of life is hard to do. Why am I gay? Why do
people hate me because I'm gay? I cannot make sense out of that.
Perhaps when I am older, I will undrestand. No. I will never be able
to understand hate. It is hard to understand love too. If only we would
sit and be, alive and happy in our existence and not interferring with

Essay (continued next page )
VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

Essay (continued from previous page )
the existence of others. That sounds like my definition of sensitivity, a
quality of maturity. Oh well, society has a lot of maturing, a lot of
growing up, to do. I ask myself- do we want to?
Bio- Ian Whitney lives in Leelanau County
and is a student at the Interlachen Arts Academy.
He can be reached via &mail at either
WHITNEYlj@interlochen.k12.mi.us or Moktir@aol.com.

LAMBDA LEGAL DEFENSE (USE

LOGO)

Tom Stoddard Dies
Thomas Stoddard, a civil rights lawyer who helped lead the fight
for gays to serve openly in the military, has died at age 48. Stoddard
died Wednesday of AIDS, according to his companion, Walter
Rieman.
As executive director of the Lambda Legal Defense and
Education Fund from 1986 to 1992, Stoddard fought for equal rights
for gay men, lesbians and people with AIDS. He maintained his
public role after leaving the organization and after becoming ill, most
recently leading the unsuccessful lobbying to end the ban against
gays serving openly in the military. More militant activists considered
his approach too conciliatory.
Former Mayor Ed Koch praised Stoddard's authorship of a 1986
New York City law that protects gays against discrimination in
housing, employment and public accommodation . "He was an
extraordinary lawyer." said Koch.
An early proponent of gay marriage, Stoddard and colleagues
debated the issue in a road show to build support within the gay
community, said Peg Byron, Lambda's public education director.
Stoddard and Rieman, also a lawyer, exchanged wedding vows and
gold bands in 1993.

FRIENDS NORTH, INC.,

DISNEY UNDER ATTACK
Three denominations have been added to a growing list of
Christian groups calling on the Walt Disney Company to return to a
more pro-family approach in its entertainment offerings. The three
groups whose stances have received recent attention are the Church
of God (Cleveland, Tenn.), the Presbyterian Church in America and
the International Church of the Foursquare Gospel.
Last June, messengers to the annual meeting of the Southern Baptist
Convention passed a resolution calling on Baptists "to give prayerful and
serious consideration" to whether to attend Disney theme parks and
purchase Disney products. The resolution suggested a boycott of Disney
if it continues "this anti-Christian and anti-family trend."
The executive council of the Church of God adopted a resolution
strongly critical of Disney and calling on the church's worldwide
membership of 4 million members and 2,500 congregations to
consider a boycott. The church has 800,000 members and 6,500
congregations in the United States.
The Church of God's resolution listed several concerns,
including:
• publication of "Growing Up Gay" by Disney-owned Hyperion
Press. The book encourages teens to explore homosexuality,
the resolution said.
• release of the movie "Priest" by Disney-owned Miramax, an
action the resolution called "a disappointing departure from
Disney's image of producing wholesome family films."
• provision of health insurance to "same-sex companions of gay
and lesbian employees" of Disney.
• Disney's hosting of "Gay and Lesbian Day" at Disney World
in Orlando.
The Presbyterian Church in America passed a similar though
much shorter statement against Disney during its assembly meeting
in Coral Ridge, Fla. The one-sentence declaration adopted by the
meeting of 2,000 PCA delegates said: "We abhor what Disney and
other corporations do to promote the homosexual lifestyle."

P.O. Box 562,

TRAVERSE CITY,

MI 49685-0562

YES, I want to be a supporting member of the Friends North Organization
D Single : $15.00
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DI am New to the mailing list. D I am already on mailing list. D Note my new address. D Please remove me from your mailing list.
The F/N mailing list is confidential and our mailings come in an unmarked envelope.
NETWORKING 45' NORTH

-16-

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

BODIES IN MOTION
TEXACO
2000 Westchester Avenue
White Plains, NY 10650

January 27, 1997

To: Mr. Henry D. Messer, MD FACS
23248 Bonair, Dearborn Heights, Ml 48127
Dear Mr. Messer:
This is in response to your letter of December 26, 1996 to Peter
I. Bijur, which has been referred to me for handling. In the letter, you
refer to the absence of "any mention of gay and lesbian employees"
in Mr. Bijur's letter to shareholders of November 26.
In reply to your concerns, Texaco's policies dictate that
employment-related decisions are to be based solely on job related
factors (i.e. education, skills, prior work experience, performance,
etc.). This principle precludes discrimination of any kind towards
employees or candidates for employment.
As has been our company's practice, one's sexual orientation is
not a factor in determining employment and advancement
opportunities within Texaco. Furthermore, our company's policies
addressing discrimination are consistent with the constitutionally
guaranteed protection as defined in the Civil Rights Act of 1964. Our
policies are also consistent with generally accepted industry practices.
As we have publicly stated, Texaco is creating an Equality and
Tolerance Task Force whose mission will be to undertake a
comprehensive review of all our equal employment opportunity and
affirmative action policies. As the task force reviews suggestions for
how we might strengthen our employment-related policies, we will
consider language that will address the issue of sexual orientation in
our Equal Opportunity Policy Statement.
Texaco recognizes the rights of all individuals to work in an
environment free of discrimination, and is committed to a corporate
culture fully supportive of opportunity and fairness for every employee.
Again, thank you for taking the time to share your concerns with us.
Sincerely,
s/ Richard F. Brenner
President, Human Resources Division

Comment by Henry Messer: This letter in effect soys that TEXACO will do
nothing about gays and lesbians. They hide in the usual rhetoric about the
"Civil Rights Act of 1964" which soys nothing about sexual orientation.

Bay

Business
•
Services
Inc.

© 1997 by the Archaeological Institute of America
For additional information or photos, see:
http://www.orchoeology.org/9701 /obstrocts/indio html

NEW AIDS CASES STABILIZING IN
STUDY

EU -

BRUSSELS (Reuter) - The number of new cases of AIDS in the
European Union is stabilizing, figures released in late January show,
but Spain, Italy and Portugal are still recording increases.
The European Commission said Wednesday that 17,778 new
cases of Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome were diagnosed in
the 15-nation bloc in the first nine months of last year compared to
1995's total of 22,383.
The Commission said intravenous drug use was responsible for
the greatest number of new cases, accounting for just under half. Male
homosexuals or bisexuals accounted for 28 percent of new infections
while 19 percent was by heterosexual contact.
The Commission said also that an increasing number of women
were being infected with AIDS - 20 percent in 1995 compared to
just 12 percent in 1986. Most of the women infected were
intravenous drug users, the report said although some 32 percent had
been infected through sex with drug-using partners.
The report added that Spain, Portugal and Italy were still showing
increases in AIDS infections and this was attributed chiefly to drug use.

d

Office: (616) 941-5748

rr:::::J

Cross Country Ski

LJF~RBUSH CORNER, INC.
• Over 35 km of trails, machine set for both skating and striding from,
beginner to expert.
• Just l /.4 mile east of 1-75 at the Lewiston/Frederic exit (264)
• Performance ski shop, rentals and instruction
• Bunkhouse and two warming areas
• Weekend food service
• One kilometer night ski trail
P.O. Box 327
Dave Forbush
4971 County Road 612
(51 7) 348-5989
Frederic, Michigan 49733

ANDREW L. MITCHELL

Accounting & Tax Service
810-B South Garfield Ave• Traverse City, Ml 49686
NETWORKING 4S'NORTH

One of the world's richest sources of information about the
performing arts in prehistoric times is the painted decoration on the
walls of caves in central India. Stick figures wearing elaborate, spikey
headdresses sway to music, while others dance choreographed steps.
Harpists with erect phalli play for dancers, some of whom are engaging
in homosexual acts. Boys and girls jump about in ecstatic dance, then
sit on beds entwined in each other's arms.
Rock art showing dance and musicianship is abundant in the
state of Madhya Pradesh, particularly in the Vindhya Hills to the north
of the Narmada River, and in the Mahadeo Hills to the south. Here,
early artists created some of the most vivid and dramatic pictures of
people in motion.

-17-

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/APRIL 1997

Human Rights Campaign, from the grassroots up." Red Wing was
instrumental in the defeat of Oregon's anti-gay ballot measure in
1992. As a resu It of her work, The Advocate named her its 1992
Woman of the Year. Simultaneously, her adversaries on the right
proclaimed Red Wing "the most dangerous woman in Oregon."

HRC LAUNCHES FORUM ON AOL
In the Quest to deliver our message as widely as possible, the
Human Rights Campaign has launched its own forum on America
Online, which currently reaches 7 million subscribers.
The HRC Forum is housed in AOL's Politics Channel and sits
along-side The White House Forum, The Capitol Connection,
Congressional
Quarterly,
The
McLaughlin Group, the ACLU and HUMAN
other political forums.
RIGHTS
The HRC Forum provides access
to our award-winning Online Action CAMPAIGN
Center, which enables users to
research issues and send messages to Congress; an ARC News and
Issues area, a Membership and Marketplace mall, a Coming Out
space, HRC Message Boards and an HRC Caucus Room. HRC will
host evening chats on a variety of lesbian and gay and AIDS issues.
The Caucus Room programming schedule is posted on line.
AOL members can access the HRC Forum using < Keyword :
HRC> or from the link in the Politics Channel.

HRC Hires Red Wing to Strengthen Field
Operation
The Human Rights Campaign starts the new year with some new
faces, and some familiar faces in new places. Longtime activist
Donna Red Wing joins HRC as national field director, Winnie
Stachelberg has been promoted to the new position of legislative
director, and Kevin Layton has been named director of the political
action committee and HRC's legislative counsel. Layton will work
closely with Chai Feldblum, HRC's outside counsel.
These changes grew out of the departure of Daniel Zingale,
HRC's political director, to become executive director of AIDS Action
Council. "We were very sorry to see Daniel leave, but he will be a
brilliant asset to AIDS Action," says HRC Executive Director Elizabeth
Birch.
Red Wing, meanwhile, comes to HRC after three years with the
Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation, where she helped
create and manage its training programs in dealing with media,
violence against gay men and lesbians and organizing against antigay initiatives. "We are thrilled to add Donna Red Wing's talent and
vast experience to the staff of the Human Rights Campaign, " Birch
says. "Her abilities as an organizer, public speaker and committed
activist will continue the process of building our movement, and the

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Tipping the Balance of Power
HRC's first foray into state politics proved to be a success as we
helped wrest the California Assembly from the hands of extremists.
The Assembly, which was split 41-39 Republican to Democrat before
Election Day, now promises to be a place where lesbians, gay men
and fair-minded Californians are safer from anti-gay legislative
attacks because of the shift to 43 Democrats and 37 Republicans .
HRC's California Project turned out thousands of volunteers
throughout the state to staff phone banks, participate in literature
drops and get people out to vote on Election Day. Openly gay
Assemblywomen Carole Migden of San Francisco and Sheila Kuehl
of Santa Monica praised HRC for its efforts. "HRC's California Project
played a pivotal role in reclaiming the California state Assembly from
the extremist factions of the Republican Party," Migden said.
"We decided that since so much anti-gay federal legislation starts
at the state level, that we could try a little preventative medicine,"
said Kevin Layton, HRC's PAC director and legislative counsel. "Plus,
the extremists held a very slim majority in California."
Along with HRC's efforts to turn around the Assembly, HRC was
also involved in many federal races in California. Senior Policy
Advocate Julio Abreu worked with HRC members in the Santa
Barbara area to elect fair-minded candidate Walter Capps, who
defeated extremist Rep. Andrea Seastrand. HRC's political action
committee supported many candidates forfederal office in California
including Loretta Sanchez, who defeated the most vocal anti-gay
member of the House, Bob Dornan, and worked to re-elect Rep . Tom
Campbell, a Republican who earned 89 percent on HRC's scorecard.

CHRYSLER PROTESTS BRING RESULT
-A report from Ron Woods

Due to the persistent efforts of the "Campaign For Equal Rights At
Chrysler", Chrysler has added the words "sexual orientation" to the
Corporate "Standards of Conduct". This most recent revision of the
"Standards of Conduct" is dated January, 1997.
Also Chrysler has stated in a letter to fellow activist David F. Reckinger
dated February 20, l 997 that diversity training is currently being evaluated
and that such training would begin "as soon as possible". These steps and
the "memo" from Chrysler CEO dated November 11, 1996, which for the
first time in known history Chrysler uttered the words "sexual orientation",
are positive steps in the right direction.
However, we maintain a healthy skepticism in light of the fact that all
of this movement has only occurred during times of tremendous work,
determination, perseverance and media attention exerted by the
"Campaign For Equal Rights At Chrysler''. Years of letter writing campaigns
and repeated requests produced no movement whatsoever, all progress
has been achieved only when overwhelming pressure has been exerted.
For this reason the sincerity and depth of the commitment to equal rights
must be drawn into question.

Chrysler (continued next page)

NETWORKING 45°NORTH

-18-

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

Chrysler (continued from previous page)
Therefore we would appreciate everyone please doing all they can
to continue to exert pressure by letter writing, phone calls and protests/
pickets and media attention to the work that needs to be completed. We
still must have:
1) A "memorandum of understanding" between Chrysler and the
United Auto Workers (UAW)
2) Effective and substantial "Diversity Training" where we as
employees have input.

·GLAAD NEWS

We would like to thank everyone who has done anything to bring
these changes about. Keep up the good work.
Sincerely, Ron G. Woods,Chairperson, Campaign For Equal Rights At
Chrysler: MichRook@aol.com - 810-545-7699

DOMESTIC PARTNERS LAW SHOWING
UP IN CONTRACTS
Some S.F. vendors quietly signing deals
The first contracts that bring companies into compliance with San
Francisco's ground breaking domestic partners law are quietly being
approved, even as fights with United Airlines and the Catholic church grab
the headlines.
Thousands of companies are trying to figure out how to comply with
the city's unique law that, starting in June, will require anyone doing
business with the city to offer the same benefits to married and unmarried
couples, including registered gay or lesbian couples. Some are already
doing it by offering the benefits.
The Pier 23 Cafe's new long-term lease with the Port Commission has
been approved, as has the Crystal Springs Golf Course operator's new
contract with the Public Utilities Commission. Glide Memorial Church said
it is creating domestic partners benefits. And in the proposed settlement of
a dispute between the city and Tele-Communications Inc., San Francisco's
cable franchisee, domestic partner benefits was not a contentious issue
because TCI already offers such benefits across the country.
"The law is written to give companies flexibility," said Cynthia
Goldstein of the San Francisco Human Rights Commission. "In the first year
or two, we don't expect all contracts to have everything in place, but we
want to see movement toward putting them in place."
It's that position that has created controversy with United, the world's
largest airline, and with the Roman Catholic archdiocese, which has asked
for an exemption for Catholic Charities.

B

l~~I

UNITED AIRLINES TO OFFER BENEFITS
TO PARTNERS
SAN FRANCISCO (AP)-United Airlines has two years to extend
health and other benefits to its workers' same-sex partners, under an
agreement reached with city leaders.
The accord, which the Board of Supervisors unanimously
approved Monday, allows United's $90 million expansion at San
Francisco International Airport.
In June, the city will begin requiring all the companies with
which it does business to offer spousal benefits to their workers
unmarried partners.
The city had said it would not approve the airline's $13.4
million, 25-year lease until it promised to comply with the new law.
Under the agreement, United must develop a spousal benefits
program in the lease's first 20 months.
"San Francisco has long been a leader in the fight for human civil
rights and once again we are setting the standard," said Supervisor
Leslie Katz, who is gay.

ERNIE DAWSON
OWNER

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NETWORKING 45' NORTH

'Ellen' nominated for GLAAD Award
ABC sitcom "Ellen," which may be preparing to bring its title
character out of the closet, is among the nominees for the eighth
annual GLAAD Media Awards, presented by the Gay & Lesbian
Alliance Against Defamation. The awards will be presented at the
media watchdog group's fund- raising banquets next month in Los
Angeles, Washington and New York.
The other TV comedy nominees announced are "Friends, ""Spin
City," "Mad About You" and "The Larry Sanders Show." The drama
series contenders are "Bedtime," "Chicago Hope" and "Relativity."
Nominees for outstanding wide-release movie are "The
Birdcage," "Bound," Flirting With Disaster," "Get on the Bus" and
"Set It Off."
The top limited-release movies are "Antonia's Line," "Beautiful
Thing," "Costa Brava," "French Twist," "It's My Party" and
"Stonewall ."
The daytime drama series nominees are "All My Children,"
"General Hospital," "One Life to Live" and "The City."
The GLAAD Awards recognize "balanced and accurate
representations" of homosexuals and issues that affect them. The wide
range of categories includes TV and newspaper journalism, advertising
campaigns, music, interactive media and even comic books.

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-19-

•

Gifts

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aW'

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997

IE

0

u

STATE AND NATIONAL HOTLINES

cc IE
LOCAL SPIRITUAL:

Rev. Geraldine Colvin & Rev. David Florence
Unity Church, 3600 Five Mile, Traverse City .. . .... . .. 616-932-9587
Rev. Emmy Lou Belcher
Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of Grand Traverse
6726 Center Rd., Traverse City-Home: 938-9078 . .. Office: 947-3117
Rev. Nancy Hayward, Circle of the Sacred Earth . .. . . ... . 616-223-7999

Department of Justice Hotline (for reporting
Hate Crimes against gays and lesbians) . . ......... . 800-347-HATE
Michigan Wellness Networks ... . ... ... ... . ... . .. . ... 800-872-AIDS
Gay/Lesbian National Youth Hotline .... .. ..... .. . . .. . 800-347-TEEN

STATEWIDE SERVICES
SOCIAL I POLITICAL / MEDIA

LOCAL COUNSELING:
Third Level Crisis Intervention, ....... . .... . . . ..... . . . 616-922-4800
1022 E. Front St., TC, Ml 49686 ..... .... .. . .. . . and 800-442-7315
Women's Resource Center . . ... . .. .. . . . .. .. .. .. .. . . . 616-941-121 O
Rodger Landvoy, PHO ..... . . . . ... .. .. .. .. . .. . . . .. . 616-929-1711
Susan Breuer PHO (Frankfort/ Traverse City) ... . . ...... 616-352-4261
Margo Million, ACSW .. ............. .. . . . . .. .. .. ... 616-947-0511
David Blisk (Maple City) ..... . ...... . .. ... ..... . . . . . 616-228-5105
Joanna T. Lauber, MA, OTR, CHt ....... . . . .. . .... . ... 616-947-8842
Barbara Jones Smith, PHO . . ... .. . . . ............. . . . 616-947-1444
Elizabeth Most, MSW, ACSW (Petoskey) . . . .... . .... . . . 616-439-0656
William D. Gould, MA (Gladwin) . . . .. ..... . ....... .. . . 517-426-2351
David Rushlow, ACSW, Munson Medical Center ..... . ... 616-935-6385
Bay Area Counseling (Petoskey/Harbor Springs)
Margalo Bley, MSW, ACSW ....... .. ... . . . . . . ... .. 616-348-3616
Daniel C. Doran, PHO, CSW . .. . . . . ................. 906-635-9263
Lois Martindale, Ph.D., Benzonia . .. . ..... .. .. .. . . .... 616-882-5888 '
CDRS (a free substance abuse referral agency)
808-A S. Garfield, Traverse City .... . .... . 929-1315 or 800-686-0749

The Network: Lesbian and Gay Community Network of W. Michigan
909 Cherry St. S.E., Grand Rapids, Ml 49506 ..... . .. . 616-458:3511
Lavender Morning
P.O. Box 50729, Kalamazoo, Ml 49005 .. .. . ..... . ... 616-685-6061
Kalamazoo Resource Center
P.O. Box 1532, Kalamazoo, Ml 49005 . .. . . .. ...... .. 616-345-7878
Affirmations Lesbian/Gay Community Center
Suite 110, 195 W. Nine Mile Rd.
Ferndale, Ml 48220 .... .... .. .. .. . .. . . ... . ... . .. . 810-398-7105
http://www.webspace.com/-tcc/affirmations/index.htme
Lansing Association of Human Rights
P.O. Box 18062, Lansing, Ml 48826 .. .. . . .. .. ...... . 517-332-3200
e-mail . ... .. . . ..... . .. . . .. .. . . .. . .. .. . . .. lahr@macatawa.org
Lesbian Connection
P.O. Box 811, East Lansing, Ml 48826 .... . . .... . . . .. 517-371-5257
Triangle Foundation (Lesbian/Gay Foundation of Michigan)
19641 W. Seven Mile Rd., Detroit 48219 . . .. .. . .. . . .. 313-537-3323
. .. .. .... ... . . . ..... .. .. ........ .. .. .... . Fax: 313-537-3379
email . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . trijeffm@aol.com
Between The Lines (newspaper/monthly) ...... .. ... .. . . 810-615-7003
33528 Eight Mile, Ste. 185A3, Livonia, Ml 48152 . .. FAX 810-615-7018
e-mail . . .... ... . . . . . .. .. .... . .. . .. ... .. .. pridepblis@aol.com
The Third Coast (magazine/monthly) .. .. . .. . . . .... . . .. 616-451-4903
1322 Hurd, SE, Grand Rapids 49506 . . ... . ...... FAX 616-451 -0915
e-mail ... . . .. . .. ......... . .. . . .. .. .. . . . . lllrdCoasst@aol.com

LOCAL SERVICE / SOCIAL I POLITICAL

NATIONAL SERVICE / SOCIAL I POLITICAL
P-FLAG: Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays
101214th St. NW, Ste. 700, Washington, DC 20005 ... . 202-638-4200
GLAAD: Gay/Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation
BO Varick St., #3E, New York, NY 10013 . . . .. .... .. . . 212-807-1700
....... . .. . .. . ...... . .. ... .... . ... .. ..... Fax: 212-807-1806
email ... . . . .. ..... . . ...... . ..... . ....... . . glaadnatl@aol.com
National Gay and Lesbian Task Force ... . . . .... ..... . . 202-332-6483
2320 17th St., NW, Washington, DC 20009 .. . .. .. Fax: 202-332-0207
Lambda Legal Defense and Education Fund ..... . . 212-809-8585 x 205
120Wall St., NY, NY 10005 . . .. . . ..... . . .. . .. . Fax: 212-890-0055
ACLU Lesbian/Gay Rights Project
1370 Mission St., San Francisco, CA 94130 . . . ....... 415-621-0674
HRC: Human Rights Campaign (National Coming Out Day)
101214th St. NS #607, Washington, DC 20005 . .. .... 202-628-4160
.... . .. . .. . . .. ... ......... .. . ... .... .. ... Fax: 202-347-5323
e-mail ....... . ... .. .. .. .. . . ...... .. . .. , .. .. www@hrcusa.org
Gay and Lesbian Victory Fund, Political Action Committee
101214th St. NW #707, Washington, DC 20005 . .. . ... 202-842-7679

NElWORKING 45 °NORTH

JR

Friends North (information line) .............. . .. . .. . . 616-946-1804
Common Voices - F/N Rap Group ... .. .... . . . . . .. .... Ed - 947-4697
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Tom - 275-6127
Windfire Gay & Lesbian Youth Support GroupCall Third Level for location & time ... . ......... . .. .. 616-922-4800
or ... .. . .. . .... . . ....... .. . . . . ... .. .. .. .. . .. .. 800-442-7315
Side Traxx Nite Club, 520 Franklin St. off of 8th St. . . .. . . . 616-935-1666
Traverse City Human Rights Commission, 400 Boardman . 616-922-4700
Gay Alcoholics Anonymous,
Grace Church, Washington at Boardman, TC . . . . John 616-922-0746
P-FLAG, Traverse City, POB 1705, Acme, Ml 49610 . Cindy 616-271 -5045
GLSTN (Gay/Lesbian/Straight Teachers Network)
PO Box 9, Traverse, Ml 49685 . . .. . . .... .. . .... .... 616-943-8800
NOW (National Organization for Women) Gail Trill .. . .. .. 616-938-1333

LOCAL HIV/ AIDS HEALTH COUNSELING:
HIV/AIDS Wellness Networks, GTA, Inc., ......... .. .... 616-947-1110
P.O. Box 1632, Traverse City, Ml 49685 . . ... ... . .. 1-800-494-1160
Business Office .... ........ . . . . . .. ... ......... .. 616-933-0279
HIV/AIDS Wellness Networks - HIV Support Group and
Family and Significant Other Support Group . . .. . . . ... 616-947-1110
Thomas Judd Care Center, 1211 W Front St., Traverse City,
Mary Dillinger, RN, Clinical Nurse Specialist ....... ... 616-935-8140
David Rushlow, ACSW Social Worker ..... .. . . . . . ... 616-935-6385
H.A.N.D.S. (HIV/AIDS Support: Petoskey) .. .. .. . . .. . . 1-800-248-6777
Community Health Clinic ...... ..... . . . ... .... . .. .. . . 616-929-4448
(anonymous counseling/testing; same-day results no fee)
Northern Michigan Planned Parenthood . .... . . . ........ 616-929-1844
(anonymous counseling & testing)
Grand Traverse County Health Department . . . .. .... .. . . 616-922-4831
(anonymous HIV Testing Center)
Emmet County Health Department (Petoskey) . . . . . . . ... . 616-347-6014
Also call the District Health Department in your area
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VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 2 • MARCH/ APRIL 1997