YWCANewsLine_no7.1995.Fall.pdf
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The YWCA
ews 1ne
A Newsletter of the YWCA of Oklahoma City
Passageway
Shelter
"The best thing
I ever did ... "
From an interview with a past Passageway residen1 The name
has been changed
Oklahoma City
Fall I 995. Number 7
HUD Says Yes to YES!
YWCA Awarded Transitional Housing Program Grant
by Ruth Ann Ference, YWCA Director of Development
The YWCA of Oklahoma City has received confirmation
by HUD
(Department of Housing and Urban Development) that its proposal to initiate a
new program for transitional housing for survivors of domestic violence has
been approved for funding in the amount of $73 1,314 over three years.
The total project, named YES! (YWCA Enabling Self-Sufficiency).
is
projected to cost $1,144,451 over three years. The grant provides for (I)
rehabilitation of 75% of an existing two story YWCA-owned building for oneand two-bedroom apartments, office, and laundry room; (2) Supportive services
( I 00%); and (3) Operating costs (75% years one and two. 50% year three). The
remaining 25% of the building will be used for storage and facility maintenance.
Carol Wall, YWCA Executive Director. said. "We have long recognized the
need to provide transitional housing and supportive services to clients after their
initial stay at Passageway for 30 to 60 days. Passageway is an emergency shelter,
and we do a phenomenal service in that short length of time. Our 23 year history
in providing services to domestic violence survivors has taught us, however,
that a women who wants to become self-sufficient needs more than a month or
two to turn her life around. The answer is YES! The YWCA is proud to be a
partner in providing the type of program that allows a woman and her children
to build a life that is free of abuse and degradation."
My name is Shelia. Five years ago
in June, for the first time, I left my
abuser. It was the hardest thing I ever
did in my life. I had nowhere to go and
no money. I took my three children,
eleven months, five and ten years old
with me. I went to my sister's for the
first night but she lived in a 750 sq ft.
home with her two children and her husband. The next day I called around and
found out about Passageway. They said
that I could come and stay there.
When I arrived. I was scared to
death. I had no idea what to expect. I
was greeted by a counselor who made
me feel at ease. I didn't know it then
See YES! pg 4.
but coming to Passageway was the best
decision I had ever made. During my
stay I learned I was better than what my
OKC Boat Club Hosts Sixth Annual YWCA
husband had lead me to believe. I
Passageway Regatta
slowly began to gain self respect and to
The OKC Boat Club hosted the sixth annual
build my life anew. I attended the meetPassageway Regatta at Lake Hefner the weekend
ings the counselors said were "mandaof July 29 and 30. The multi-class regatta attracted
tory" and found I was not alone. I dismore than 200 sailors from Oklahoma. Kansas,
covered almost everyone there was
Arkansas, and Texas.
married to the "same man" I was. It
Liz Eagan, regatta chair for this year's event,
was very eye opening. I was encourreported that the regatta raised over $3,500 for
aged to get my life together. I was told
the YWCA Passageway Shelter for Battered
I was very smart and I could do anyWomen and Children.
thing I wanted to with my life. It was
Sixty-nine boats registered and sailed during
then I decided to go back to school.
Passageway Regatta '95. Keel boats competed in
Now, five years later I am a senior
three races while centerboard and multihulls sailed
in college and am scheduled to graduin a total of five races. "We are one of the few
ate in December 1995 with a Bachelor's
sailing clubs to host simultaneous, multi-class
Degree in Family and Child Developraces," Eagan said. "It requires a lot of extra effort
ment.
to design and officiate the different race courses,
I am proud to say that I once was a
Sailing onlo Lake Hefner for the but the advantage is that we have more sailing
resident of Passageway, the best thing
start of Passageway Rego/la '95
See Regatta pg 5.
I ever did for myself and my children.
Sen in~ Oklahoma City Since 1907... The \\\CA
The YWCA NewsLine
YWCA Directory
CRISIS SERVICES
YWCA Gaylord Community
Service Complex
( 405) 948-1770
YWCA lone Branch
( 405) 721-2485
YWCA McFarland Branch
(405) 424-4623
YWCA Crisis Intervention
Services
(405) 947-4506
YWCA Domestic Violence Victim
Assistance Program
(405) 297-288 I
YWCA Rape Crisis Center
Hotline
(405) 943-7273
YWCA Domestic Violence
Hotline
( 405) 949-1866
YWCA Third Phase Men's
Group
(405) 947-4508
Positive Tomorrows Transitional
Center
(405) 948-6012
Fall 1995
Pa e 2
CITY CONTINUES DWAP
FUNDING
SEXUAL ASSAULT
The city recently announced that it
will continue funding of the YWCA
Domestic Violence Victim Assistance
Program (DVVAP).
This program
originally started in February, 1994,
with a grant from the city of Oklahoma
City.
DVVAP
represents
a
collaborative effort of the Oklahoma
City Police Department. Municipal
Court system. and the YWCA of
Oklahoma City.
Deena Ezzell, YWCA staff member
and DVVAP coordinator, has an office
in the municipal court building. "If
you're going to be useful, you have to
be where you're needed," Ezzell said.
"The clients I work with usually feel
overwhelmed by the legal process.
Most victims do not understand the
differences between municipal and
district courts or even civil and criminal
proceeding.,.
"DVV AP is here to help domestic
violence victims get through the
system." Ezzell continued. "We assist
with counseling. helping victims to file
for Victim Protection Orders, and
provide referral services."
Over the past 12 months, DYV AP
has served 726 clients.
For more
information call 297-2881.
On June 15of this year, the YWCA
Rape Crisis Center embarked on a different program to help assault victims.
Called SANE (Sexual Assault Nurse
Examiners), it started in Tulsa several
years ago. The Tulsa program provided
the model for the OKC center.
The new program greatly reduces
doctors and hospital involvement, costs
to the victim. lack of privacy and
lengthy waiting-all
of which can add
trauma and humiliation to the survivor.
Instead, the 6th floor at University Hospital has provided. free of charge a family room and a special rape crisis examination room, where nurses. specifically trained at the Tulsa Center, examine the victims and give needed medication. Whatever expensesare incurred
are paid for by the Oklahoma Crime
Victims Compensation Board.
"The victim does not go through this
alone," said Andrea Conklin. YWCA
Rape Crisis Advocate, "One or more
volunteers are on call 24 hours a day,
and when the Hotline call comes
through, we go immediately to the Hospital, giving emotional support in any
way we can. The public needs to know
that the YWCA is always here to help
in time of crisis," she added.
by Blanche Barrymore
Growing Up Strong
by Jeannine Desmarais, YWCA Volunteer
has recently initiated a new program with
the express purpose of addressing those
needs. GUS. or Growing up Strong, is a
program designed to help children develop self-esteem in a number of different ways. In short, GUS could be said to
feed the soul.
GUS was developed through the
Most of the children who come into joint efforts of the University of Oklathe YWCA PassagewayShelter for Bat- homa's Center for Child and Family Detered Women and Children arrive with
velopment - Continuing Education and
the clothes on their backsand fear in their Public Service and the Washita Valley
hearts. Their physical needs for shelter, Community Action Council Head start
food. and clothing are often urgent.
program. They perceived a strong need
Equally important are unmet social, emo- to emphasizeactivities with young chiltional, and self-care needs. The
dren that would promote mental
Children's Department at Passageways wellness and prevent mental health probSen inf! Okl.thoma Cit~ Since 1907... The\\\
!ems, such as substanceabuse, in the future. GUS activities promote life skill development such as decision-making,
problem-solving, assertiveness,accepting
responsibility, cooperation, self-expression, and critical thinking.
At the shelter. GUS is utilized with
children from ages 3-11. Most of these
children lack basic life skills. They may
be physically, emotionally, and socially
delayed. They are often confused and
anxious, and simply getting their attention can be a challenge. GUS promotes
basic self care and cooperation with
others. All of which adds up to building
self-esteem and respect for others.
C\
The YWCA NewsLine
Fall 1995
Page 3
YWCA Board
of Di rectors
CRISIS SERVICES
Dealing with Anger
by George Young, 3rd Phase Facilitator
Ken (not his real name) came into
the Third Phaseprogram very confused
and ashamed
of
his
violent
confrontations
with his girlfriend.
They had a child and were living
together. During the first few sessions
Ken shared very little. It was not until
the fourth session. a session in which
he heard one of the older men express
"/don't know why I
get so angry!"
his own feelings of shame. that Ken
broke his silence. ·'I don't know why i
get so angry," he said.
The process of change had begun.
In the weeks that followed. Ken was
able to talk about his childhood and
slowly revealed a background of family
abuse. Eventually. he began exploring
the areas of stress in his current
environment and discovered pent-up
anger with his job and boss.
Once Ken made the connection to
his own anger. he began to make great
strides in group.
His awareness
allowed him to recognize the proper
focus of his frustration.
Ken's
girlfriend
had
left. but he was
now able to let
her go and share
this with the
group. Ken still
visits
us at
Third Phase on
occasion
continues to verbalize his problems.
But now he speaks of his struggle in
positive terms and good choices.
Does Third
Phase make a
difference? It has been over a year and
a half and Ken now feels that he has
permanently moved to a new level. ..
with higher levels yet to attain.
I like Ken's story because it helps
illustrate the philosophy of the YWCA
3rd Phase Program. As counselors, we
are here to help individuals raise their
level of awareness. to guide them
toward
acceptance
of personal
responsibility for their actions... not
to make marriages work, to bring
Families together or to assign blame.
We are also here to help individuals
confront abusive practices in intimate
relationships and make healthy choices
for the future.
YWCA
Board of Directors
1995-1996
Officers
Helen Von Feldt
President
Kathy Donovan,
Ph.D.
President Elect.
Jean Wallace.
I st Vice Pres.
Sue Hale
2nd Vice Pres.
Evalie I lorner
Treasurer
Loretta Love
Secretary
Members
Sara Jane Bell
DeDe Benham
Christine l3yrd
Meridith Cassidy
Sody Clements
Jane Crain
Christy Elliott
Pat Gallagher
Kay Green
Lori Hansen. M.D.
Ann Henry
Georgetta James
Therese K icrl
Carol Ann Kratz
Patty Lutz
Vivian Miller
Lee Ann Nordin
Gayle Scmtner
Diana Lopez
Story
Phyllis J. Stough
Gail Stricklin
Paulette Ziegler
Ex-Officio
Mary Morey
Past President
Carol Wall
Executive Dir.
Are We Having Fun Yet?
YouBet!
If you haven't been by either
YWCA lone or YWCA McFarland
branches lately. then now is a good time
to stop in and look over the fall line up
of activities. Both branches continually
add new programs and many existing
services have been expanded.
McFarland Branch: New this fall
at the McFarland Branch is recreational
baskctbal I for boys and girls age seven
to thirteen, soccer for primary school
age children.
beginning
and
intermediate ballet for all ages, and the
"Get Fit McFarland Club" for adults.
Of special significance is McFarland's
new "Women's Resource Center"
which. when fully developed, will
serve as a clearing house of resources
and information on services and offer
monthly
workshops
on health,
nutrition. careers, and Family.
lone Branch: The lone Branch fall
program schedule lists a number of
water exercise. swim. and fitness
classes. The lone soccer league expects
to host 32 teams with more than 400
individual
players during the fall
season. Teams are divided into age
groups from under six to nineteen and
there are also special soccer clinics, as
Did you thmk of a few things you might want
to do t/11sfall season: We thought so.'
well as programs for the very young
and the not so young. The lone Branch
also offers karate, slimnastics, ball
room dancing. br1dge, special dances
for 5th and 6th grade students, a weekly
book club, and a new arts and crafts
club.
While at lone, be sure to ask
about the special luxury bus tours and
shopping trips they are planning.
Serving Oklahoma City Since 1907... The\ WCA
The YWCA NewsLine
Fall 1995
Page4
YWCA Welcomes New Board Members
The YWCA of Oklahoma City welcomes six new members
to the YWCA Board of Directors for
1995-1996. The YWCA is honored to have so many talented and dedicated community leaders on its board .
•
Sody Clements
Christy Elliott
Kay Green
Sody McCampbell Clements is the
Membership Vice President of the
Junior League of Oklahoma City. She
1salso a member of the Rainbow Fleet
Board.
Sody is a Training
and
Publications Manager for the C.R.
Anthony Company.
Christy Elliott is Area Manager for
Southwestern
Bell
Telephone
Company. She is Vice Chair of the
United Way Allocations Sub-Committe
and is on the Initiatives Committee.
Christy is also a member of the' AIMHI' Mathematics Advisory Board.
Ann Henry
.
....
Diana Lopez Story
James has a Master's
Degree of Education. is President of
Millwood's Board of Education. a
board member of the OK Committee to
Prevent Child Abuse, a Leadership
Oklahoma Alumna, and past president
of Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority.
Ann Henry is an interior decorator and
owner of The Fabric Shoppe. She
organized
the Oklahoma
City
Foundation for Dyslexia. Ann is a
current member of the Winter Ball
Committee. benefiting Allied Arts. and
was past Chair of the Beaux Arts Ball.
Diana Lopez Story has a Bachelor's
Degree ofFine Arts from the Univer5ity
of New Mexico and a Master's Degree
in Human Relations
from the
University of Oklahoma. She is the
Treasurer of the I lispanic Employment
Program Committee and is also a
member of the Federal Women's
Program Commission.
from pg 1.
residents is nine months to one year.
During that time, job training,
education, and case management will
be provided.
The YWCA will need to contribute
over $400,000 for the project over the
three years. Ms. Wall continued, "We
want to expand our partnership with
the community. Since statistics tell us
that one in four women wi 11experience
domestic violence during her lifetime,
YES! will be an investment in real
people we all know. Some are friends
or family members, some we see at
work. The HUD grant and community
support will provide the resources to
help the YWCA make YES! a reality!
Georgetta James
Q
Kay Green is a career consultant for
corporate outplacement.
She is a
frequent
speaker
at business
luncheons. conferences. and also
speaks to high school groups. Kay is
a "graduate" of the 1991 YWCA
Institute for Public Leadership.
YES!---------
The majority of participants to be
served by YES! will be former clients
of the YWCA Passageway Shelter for
Battered Women and Children while
an anticipated 10-15% of the residents
will come from other crisis programs m
the state and local non-domestic
v10lence homeless population. The
anticipated length of stay for YES 1
.
Georgetta
I didn't know what she
would say next...
Story related by a Passageway Child Advocate
She was a quiet. thoughtful ten
year old. She hesitated when I asked
her the more probing questions that
were part of the intake evaluation.
However. she was more forthcoming on
the less threatening ones.
"What do you dislike about being
111the shelter?" I asked.
"I have to go to bed too early'"
she responded. It is a frequent complaint among children at the shelter.
"What do you like about being in
the shelter?"
Her face grew serious and I wondered what would follow. ··1like being
able to play with all the other kids. I
likefeeling safe . . "then, quietly, sadly...
"and I really like it here because you
can have al I the food you wanl and we
get lo eat three times a day."
It's a moment I will never forget.
Sening Oklahoma City Since 1907... The "\CA
Om· of 1hc ha11tl•c.raf1cd ctll):l'''
dmu.tfl•d h,1
Al, /)or,;//,) (ionlrmof.\lrt•wm1mlf.l,
lll1111m
Chicago Hope
The bombing of the Murrah Building
resulted in an outpouring of love from
across the nation. We were especially
moved by Ms. Dorothy Gordon who
sent 150 hand-crafted angels to the
YWCA and asked for our help in getting
them to survivors of the bombing and
to rescue workers. The Rev. Young, a
chaplin at St. Anthony's hospital where
most of the victims were treated, and
the United Way will help us distribute
these beautiful gifts.
The YWCA NewsLine
The YWCA received and processed more than 1,473
thank you letters for cash gifts and 833 thank you letters
for in-kind donations during fiscal year 1994. We can
never say "Thank You" enough ... the following is a list of
special friends and donors who supported the YWCA
with either cash or in-kind gifts between May 30, 1995
and June 28, 1995. We truly appreciate your generosity
and kindness.
Cash
Donations
Alpha Chi Omega Rho Rho Chapter
Anonymous
Bank IV
Connie Blevins
Mrs Fred M. Buxton
Christine Byrd
Casady School
Shield Society
Meridith Cassidy
Frances E. Clark
Jane Crain
Rosetta Culpepper
Edmond Knights of
Columbus #6477
Michael & Beverly
Ellis
Eta Phi Beta-Tau
Scholarship
Charities
Marian Euwing
Fleming Companies,
Inc.
Dean /\. Fleshman
Mr. & Mrs. Bernard
Fudge Jr.
Betty S. Gordon
Kay I'. Green
Regatta
H. Huffman & Co.
Mr. & Mrs. Edward
J. Harvey
Lillian F. Hayes
Ann I lenry
Sara 1-liekc
Katherine I lornor
Vicki P. I loward
Martha Irwin
Georgclla James
Jeanelle Koss
Frances KuykendallBaker
Nancy Lewis
Carol inc L. Lofton
Lutheran Church of
Our Savior
Mr. & Mrs. Kenneth
G. Maillard
L111daMangum
Diann Maytubby
Cynthia Meyerson
Ernest111cM. Miles
Larry L. Miles
Vivian Miller
Mary Morey
Neonatal Services.
Inc.
Oklahoma Natural
Gas Company
Dorothy M. Parker
La Vonne Reedy
Ray Riddles
Mikell Rieder
SBC Communicalions. Inc.
Odette Scobey
Dr. G. Edward
Shissler
Small Miracles
Mable Smith
St Stephens Presby
Women's Fellowship
Phyllis Taylor
The Oklahoma
Hospitality Club
The Persian Club
Lynda Joyce
Thomas
Dr. Donna Neal
Thomas
Jane D. Veazey
Jennifer Von Feldt
Marie Yon Feldt
Ina Waldrop
Bozic Mae Walker
John & Carol Wall
Lynn White
Jacque Wright
Rev. George E.
Young
Jeanne Pratt
Mr. E.E. Young
Betty Quinlan
from pg 1.
Fall 1995
PageS
In-Kind
Donations
Miss Irene Caudia
Armstron
Ms. Marlene
AsmussenDickson
Miss Ann E.
Atk111son
Mr. David Austin
Mrs. Marjorie
Bailey
Ms. Dons Beedley
Bethany Tribune
Mr & Mrs. Blanton
Mr. Ray Bowring
Ms. Ruth Brown
Mrs. Carla Van
Buskirk
Ms. Barbara Byrd
Mrs. Debbie Carlin
Cathy's Connection
Frances E. Clark
Mrs. Daniel Clarke
Mrs. Ed Cook
Susan Cook
Ms Teen Cook
Cox Cable
Dandee Doughnuts
Mrs. Pam Doughty
Mrs. W.E. Durrett
Ms. Christy Elliott
Epsilon Phi
Conclave - Kappa
Kappa Iota
Ms. Ann Evick
Mr. & Mrs. Robert
Ference
Ms. Georgann L.
Ferguson
Mrs. C.D. Forbes
Ms. Charlene
Francis
Good Shepherd
Christian Church
Grace Rescue
Mission
and less time waiting for a course to clear."
Special thanks to Passageway Regatta '95 major sponors.
including: The Oklahoma City Boat Club,
Cardinal Environmental,
The Iguana
Lounge, The Daily Oklahoman, United
Mechanical. Southwestern Bell, and
Integrations Incorporated.
Other special Passageway Regatta
supporters included: OG&E Electric
Services, Bob Willoughby Design, Dr.
Stewart C. Smith, Miller Distributing, Ernst
& Young L.L.P., Smith Cogeneration,
Southwestern Bell Mobile Systems,
Control
Fire Systems,
Appraisal
Resources, Inc., Shasta, On the Cuff, OKC
Passageway ·95 Regatta Chairperson Li=
Boatworks, McDermott Sails, Sew What!,
Eagan (left) and Co-Chair Patricia
KTOK, New York Bagel Shop, Quail Plaza
Greenwall (right) take a momentary
IGA, and the City of Oklahoma City.
break before the beginning ot the races.
Dorothy Gros
Mr. Neal 1-1.Hardin.
Jr.
Ms. Dora I larvey
Ms. Kathy I latch
Mrs. Evalie Horner
Miss Kather111e
Hornor
Hospice of Central
Oklahoma
Mrs. Julie L.
lloward
Mrs. Edna I lubbell
Mrs. Eleanor
Jackson
Mrs. Vickie Jones
Mrs. Tillie Kernan
Kerr-McGee
Corporation
Miss Karla Killinger
Mrs. Francis
Kuykendall-Baker
Lawn Service
Systems. Inc.
Mrs. Jeannett Lingc
Mrs. Dru Lynch
Mary Kay
Cosmetics
Mrs Melanie
McCoy
Ms. Lauren
McKnight
Mrs. Mary Morey
Mrs. Lynne
Murphy
Mrs. Clyde E.
Nance
Mrs. Barbara
Nicholas
NSO-East Health
Center
Mrs. Marge Odor
OKC Chorus
Mrs. Rita Oldham
Mrs. Joanie Raff
Mr. Robert Reid
Mrs Blanche
Rogers
Miss Virginia
Scherler
Mrs. Darlene Shadid
Ms. Connie Shelton
St. Anthony
Hospital Volunteer
League
Mrs. Phyllis J
Stough
Miss Jennifer
Sullivan
Sweet Adelines OKC Chorus
Temple B 'nai Israel
- 4th Grade Class
ICSS
Temple B ·nai Israel
Sisterhood
Mrs. Mandy Terr}
The Black
Chronicle
Mrs. Richard
Thompson
Mr Bob Tigert
Mr. & Mrs Don
Turner
Mrs Dolly C
Turner
Ms. Carla Yan
Buskirk
Mrs. Cathrine
Wealc
Wild Birds
Unlimited
Ms. Florene E.
Wilson
Mrs. Robert E.
Wiser
Ms. Kathryn
Woods
Ms. Gloria Woolum
Work Activity
Center
Ms Shirlev Wunder
MISS Beverly R
Young
Zeta Master-Beta
Sigma Ph,
The following are ongoing needs for
the YWCA Passageway Shelter and
the YWCA Rape Crisis Center:
Towels
Single sheets
Bed spreads (single)
Pillows
Laundry soap
Canned & nonperishable foods
Cleaning supplies
Disposable diapers
Stainless flatware
Tooth brushes
Sen ine O1,lahoma City Sin re I 907 ... The , \\ C. \
New underwear
(Women&
Children's)
Sweat suits
(tops & pants
don't have to
match)
Feminine hygiene
products
The YWCA NewsLine
Fall 1995
Page6
Ju!:t frnaginf!
604,0<?0 !:!!COlld!:
10,0<?0 minute!:
16<?hout!:
7 day!:
WITHOUT VIOLENCE
Now you can help make it happen. Join the
YWCA as it launches a nation wide campaign to
stop the violence. For more information please
call 948-1770.
YWCA Week Without Violence
October 15-21, 1995
No bench, no problem ... at the YWCA
we believe soccer should be played, not
watched. So, what are you going to
do this fall?
This year the YWCA soccer programs expect to
field 32 teams. In addition to soccer, the YWCA
lone and McFarland Branches offer a wide variety
of recreational, educational, and health related
services. YWCA memberships are good at all
YWCA branches nation wide. Come join the fun.
YWCA News Updates Inside
Special thanks to Kerr-McGee for printing the
YWCA newsletter.
YWCA of Oklahoma City, Inc.
2460 NW. 39th St
Oklahoma City, OK 73112
A United Way P,n1ncr/\gc11cy
Sen ing Oklahoma Cit~ Since 1907... The \ \\ C.\
Non-Profit Org.
U.S. Postage
Paid
Oklahoma City. OK
Permit No. 228
Part of YWCA NewsLine : no.7(1995:Fall)