HerlandVoice-1994-10-v11-no10_ocr.pdf
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- HerlandVoice-1994-10-v11-no10_ocr.pdf
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FALL RETREAT
Herland's Fall retreat will be held October 21-23,1994, in
the beautiful eastern part of our state, at Arrowhead State Park
near Eufaula, Oklahoma. To get to Arrowhead from Oklahoma City, drive due east for two hours and turn south for a
few miles (a map of the location will be sent with your
registration confirmation, for those of you who prefer more
specific directions ... )
Arrowhead has been modernized in recent years, and is
one of the most comfortable of our state parks; as well as being
fully accessible . Be sure to have your fishing license current, as
there is fine fishing - and swimming - in nearby Lake Eufaula.
There are also good hiking trails and a golf course. Bring your
bike -- park roads are a great place to ride and there's supposed
to be a bike route around the lake . And you may be sure there
will be softball games, volleyball, card games - and lots of trees
to just sit and read or doze or meditate under if that's what
strikes your fancy. Also, there will be a variety of workshops,
the topics of which will be limited only by the imagination of
the Retreaters themselves. There will be a women's market
with Herland's books and music and other vendors' goods.
We will have wonderful entertainment -- provided by
ourselves on Friday night at the campfire, and Saturday afternoon at the open mike; and Saturday night by the Therapy
Sisters, who were a delightful act even before they were lucky
enough to snag Mary Reynolds as one of their Therapists.
Retreat registration (see handy registration form in this
issue) includes attendance at the concert, three meals, - a late
supper on Fridav (vellie and non-vellie). Saturdav Brunch and
S~day breakfa~t ~ ~d lodging in ;; g~·oup cab~. Be sure to
bring your tastiest dish for the famous Saturday night Pot
Luck.
There is a lodge available for those who prefer more
luxurious living and sleeping. The lodge, Arrowhead Lodge
and Gaming Center, is not actually owned by the State; it
belongs to the Choctaw Indian Nation, and the "Gaming
Center" refers to Bingo, which is played there on weekends.
The RV hookups are about a quarter of a mile from the
group camp. You will need to make arrangements for the
Lodge or the RV area on your own.
Above all, there will be time to play and relax in the
comfort and security of women-only space. Hope to see you
there.
D
October 11: Coming Out Day. Do it today!
October 15: Jammin' For Peace, 8pm, First Unitarian Church,
600NW13th, OKC. Peggy Johnson and others.
October 16: AIDS WALK
October.16: Herland Board Meeting, 4:30pm; all welcome.
October 21 - 23: Herland Retreat at Arrowhead.
October 27: Newsletter mailing party; 6:30 pm
Volwne 11 Nwnber 10
JAMMIN' FOR PEACE
A benefit concert for The Peace House, sponsored by the
Social Justice Committee of the First Unitarian Church, will be
held on Saturday, October 15th, 8:00 p .m. at the First Unitarian
Church, 600 NW 13th Street, Oklahoma City. Tickets are $10
for adults and $2 .50 for children 7 -12 years old. There will
be free snacks and cash bar. Child care will be provided.
Several local musicians are donating their time and talents
to benefit the Peace House. Come enjoy the singing, drumming
and story telling of JAHRUBA; the lively, dynamic vocals of
Peggy Johnson and traditional folk and acoustic music with
Lonnie & Lee from Norman.
The Peace House has served central Oklahoma since 1981
as an education and advocacy center for issues of peace with
justice -- most especially human rights, economic justice and
environmental sustainability. For information call 524-5577. D
AIDS
WALK
This year's AIDS Walk Oklahoma will be held October 16
at the Myriad Gardens in Oklahoma City. As before, this year's
event will be a SK walk through downtown Oklahoma City.
The money raised is earmarked for HNI AIDS care and prevention services in Oklahoma, through twelve different agencies. Nearly as important as the money is raising awareness of
a disease, stigmatized by ignorance and bigotry, that has
already claimed more than 1000 lives in Oklahoma, and 200,000
throughout America. Regi$trati.on begiit$ at 1 pm, opening
ceremonies at 2 pm, and the Walk steps off at 2:30.For more
information about participating in the AIDS Walk, call 405/
525-AIDS. Your tax-deductible donation may be made to
AIDS Walk Oklahoma, P.O. Box 57754, Oklahoma City, OK
73157-7754.
D
THE MANGLED SEPTEMBER VOICE:
It was a nightmare getting the September Voice out. First,
we had to cram a lot of information into a tiny space, on account
of a temporary cash flow crunch; then we forgot that the
August calendar called for a "newsletter party" on Monday
the 22nd, so people showed up at Herland to fold a newsletter
that was far from ready; then it got too late to get it to and from
the printer until after Labor Day; then, when it was ready to
prepare for mailing, we had only a few people to spend a lot of
time folding, inserting a pamphlet, and stapling it... .then, the
mailing was refused at the post office because the enclosed
pamphlets had bulk rate postage imprinted on them -- the post
office has a zillion rules for bulk mail, and this is the first time
we have run afoul of one of them for many years . Anyway,
then we had to take the mailing home, pull out every staple and
insert, bundle them up again, and take them back to the post
office. And that, dear readers, is why your newsletter was so
very late and kind of molested looking (and why one article
D
referred to an insert that wasn't there).
Herland Sister Resources
2312 N.W. 39, OKC, OK 73112
LILITH'S TURN
Eds. Note: This space has been reserved for St. Sybil for .some time
now. Recently in attempting to channel to Sybil, we have been
blocked by a very obnoxious, annoyed and annoying Lilith, who claims
to have been the first woman in the bible until it was sanitized and she
was purged for refusing to submit to Adam. We promised to let her
speak at least one time, so with more than a few misgivings, here she
is.
Greetings from beyond, from the great divide, from the
first, the last and every oasis on the great Continuum. I am
Lilith, and I am come to enlighten you. Today, I wanted to
suggest thirteen ways to improve this world you are making,
but they wouldn't give me enough space in this abbreviated
little issue; so here are five ways to make people in this world
happier.
1. Toilet paper should be hung with the paper coming over
the roll, not under. Now you know, so no more griping and
complaining and asking Ann Landers. Gee whiz, that was
easy.
2. Women will hereinafter refuse to accept higher wages
than men for doing equal work.
3. Women will hereinafter faithfully do their full share of
the housework and child nurturing, bill paying, doctor finding, etcetera. It's only fair .
4. Third World people promise to hereinafter use their fair
share of the earth's resources, and not one loaf of bread, gallon
of gas or rainforest more.
5. Women everywhere will swear off violence, so the
world will no longer have to fear any violence perpetrated by
women.
Sing Hallelujah, y'all . Don't you feel safer now? Thanks
for your time, and the blessings of the universe on you. Lilith. D
GIRLS WITH GUITARS
Herland was proud to sponsor the second open mic coffee
house of 1994 on September 24. With only word-of-mouth
advertising, the coffee house was well attended and featured
some of Oklahoma City's finest female singers and songwriters.
Joan R. opened the show, making her first reappearance in
the music scene in several years. It was great to hear her play
and sing again. Joan was followed by the ever-talkative Donna
D. who was a crowd-pleaser as always.
A new trio of "girls with guitars" featuring Kristall,
Tammy and Wanda rocked the house with covers of the Indigo
Girls, 4 Non Blondes, and Melissa Etheridge, in addition to
introducing us to some of Wanda's bluesy originals.
Cuchla was joined by Kristall, Wanda and Nancy on her
popular original "Back Door to Heaven" and then played
several more original songs.
Stacie closed the first set with several original country
tunes and a couple of Melissa Etheridge covers.
Tammy, Kristall and Wanda came back in the second set
with more great songs and guitar picking.
The next open mic is tentatively planned for December and
may be held in a larger place to accommodate the crowd. Keep
your ears open and watch The Voiceto be informed. If you are
interested in performing at the next openmic, please leave your
information at Herland for Nancy.
D
SEVENTH ANNUAL CREATING
CHANGE CONFERENCE
The National Gay and Lesbian Task Force (NGLTF) will
host its annual skills-building conference in Dallas, Texas,
November 11 through 13, with pre-conference institutes on
November 9 and 10.
More than 70 workshops will be showcased at this year's
Creating Change. Prior to the main body of the conference,
Creating Change features full-day pre-conference institutes: .
the People of Color Organizing Institute; the Transformation
Institute on November 9; and the Race, Class and Gender
Institute on November 10. This year's conference will include
three-Fightthe Right intensives (elections, education, religious
organizing) as well as a Fundraising Intensive, AIDS Intensive,
and Youth Intensive.
The conference will be held at Southland Center Hotel in
downtown Dallas. Call 800-272-8007 for room reservations,
and identify yourself as a Creating Change participant for.
special rates .For further information about Creating Change,
contact Sue Hyde at (617) 492-6393.
D
LESBIANIGAY EoucAr10NALISoc1AL GROUP
An educational and social activities group for lesbian,
gay, and bisexual adults sponsored by Red Rock Mental Health
Center meets every Thursday evening from 7:30 - 10 pm at
Triangle Association, 2136 NW 39th Street.
October activities include: October 6 -- Alan Nytray of
OSDH will discuss HN /AIDS research and progress; October
13 -- "Is Prejudice & Discrimination Against the Homosexual
Today Real or Perceived", a debate and discussion with Mike
Splitt and Bill George; October 20 --"How Not to Have Sex on
the First Date" discussion led by Terry Dennison of Planned
Parenthood; and October 27--"Homophobia" a workshop led
by Tina Steeves and Steve Lazarus from Simply Equal of
Norman.
All groups are free and open to the public. For more
information on these or other services provided by Red Rock,
D
call Betsy Murphy at 425-0399.
Rebecca R. Cohn, Ph.D.
Clinical Psychology
Norman, OK
321-2148
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2 Her/and Voice October, 1994
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Couples & Famny
Therapy
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noQmar.i.,..ok 73069
Herland Fall Retreat
featuring
The Therapy Sisters
"Call them the Jung. and the Restless. They skillfully
lampoon musical styles from Andrews Sisters-style
scat to lilting folk Madonna harmonies to faux-Seattle
grunge."
Sparkling wit, solid musicianship and stylistic breadth from
rockabilly and swing to folk and showtune genres."
-Victory Review, Se.att/e, i1-'.A
--,A,ustin ,A,merican Statesman
October 21-23
Arrowhead State Park
Pre-registration $15-60
On-site registration $60
Call Herland at 521-9696 for information
There'll be lots of other fun and entertainment with a
Friday night campfire, open mic, hiking, biking, and all
the fun a hundred or more women can dream up.
DOCTOR, DOCTOR
by Vivien Ng
Scenario One, Doctor's Office: My internist peered over
his half-glasses and asked me in a stem voice, "When did you
have your last pelvic examination?"
(Damn, this is the question I have been dreading ever since
my lesbian-friendly gynecologist in Seattle retired several years
ago.) "Well, not since my GYN retired," I stammered. "Young
lady, you know better than that! I'm going to refer you to Dr.
X. Don't be alarmed, it's only a routine exam, and you don't
have to do it immediately!" I mumbled that I did not have a
free moment for another two months, just to buy more time to
psyche myself up for the inevitable.
Scenario Two, Home: I called a friend of mine, a pediatrician, and asked him about Dr. X. "Is she okay?" "Sure, she's
a bit of an old-school, but I refer my patients to her ." "Oldschool? Do you mean that she is conservative? Is she homophobic?" "Nah, she's okay ." (Damn, again. This is by no
means a ringing endorsement. How do I deal with the questionnaire that I will have to fill out at the doctor's office?
Questions like: Are you sexually active? How often do you
have sexual intercourse? Do you use birth control? Does your
partner use condoms? Maybe I should tell her that I'm a nun.
Or a former nun who has just left the convent. Hey, that's an
idea! I went to a convent school, and my classmates and I used
to speculate wildly about the goings-on in the convent adjacent
to the school, so all I have to do is to pull from memory
whatever bits and pieces about convent life that we thought we
knew and pass it on to the doctor as my own personal experience! But what if she's a practising Catholic? It's been years
since I have seen a convent, do nuns still live in convents?
Maybe it's better that I present myself as a sexually active
heterosexual who doesn't use any form of birth control. Maybe
I should just tell her the truth. But what if she is homophobic?
Can I risk being poked" down there" by a god-fearing, lesbianhating doctor? Maybe I should just cancel the appointment!
But I am long overdue for a pelvic exam ....)
Scenario Three, Doctor's Office: I showed up half an hour
before my appointment in order to fill out. the dreaded newpatient questionnaire. The receptionist handed me a couple of
standard forms and a booklet of questions. Good thing I gave
myself 30 minutes to do my assignment! "Are you currently
engaged in sexual intercourse?" I had only two choices: yes or
no. I was tempted to write, "Not right here in the doctor's
waiting room, no!" Instead, I scribbled on the margin, "Not in
the heterosexual sense!''
(What I was really tempted to do was to quote at length
passages from Marilyn Frye's essay, "Lesbian 'Sex'." For
example, about a study on couples conducted by Blumstein
and Schwartz which suggests that lesbians "had sex" less
frequently than heterosexual couples, Frye writes, "What violence did the lesbians do their experience by answering the
same question the heterosexuals answered, as though it had the
same meaning for them? How did the lesbians figure out how
to answer the questions 'How frequently?' or 'How many
times?' ... We have no idea how the individual lesbians surveyed were counting their 'sexual acts.' But this also raises the
questions of how heterosexuals counted their sexual acts. By
orgasms? By whose orgasms? If the havings of sex by
Published by: Herland Sister Resources, Inc. 2312 N .W. 39th, Oklahoma City, OK 73112
heterosexual married couples did take on the average 8 minutes, my guess is that in a very large number of those cases the
women did not experience orgasms .... So, do lesbian couples
really 'have sex' any less frequently than heterosexual coup Jes?
I'd say that ... by the criteria that I'm betting most of the
heterosexual people used to count 'times,' lesbians don't have
sex at all. No male orgasms, no 'times'.")
Postscript: My "female parts" checked out okay. The
doctor was nice but the receptionist who processed the questionnaire would not look me in the eye. I should have read
Marilyn Frye's essay in its entirety to her.
0
AT
HERLAND
LooK FOR THESE SALE BooKs!
Happy Endings edited by Kate Brandt: Intimate portraits
of the lesbian writers whose books have shaped our lives.
Reach into the soul of National Book Award nominee Dorothy
Allison. Look behind the art of Lambda Award winners
Jewelle Gomez, Minnie Bruce Pratt, Joan Nestle, Katherine V.
Forrest. Meet the chroniclers who powerfully convey our lives
and culture: Carol Seajay,Sarah Schulman, Lee Lynch, Franco,
Leslea Newman, Toni Armstrong.
The Spy in Question by Amanda Kyle Williams: Topical
as today's headlines, filled with all the fast-paced action and
high-octane suspense you have come to expect from Lambda
Award nominee Amanda Kyle Williams. Madison is thoroughly enjoying an accidental liason with a famous female
rock star when she is summoned to her most challenging
assignment: locate and offer help to a small resistanct band
hidden in the Peruvian jungle.
LooK FoR THESE NEW BooKs!
Triple Exposure by Jackie Calhoun: Photographer Nicky
Hennessey is at a crossroads. Passionately involved with old
friend Beth Forrester, she must face the painful truth that Beth
is unwilling, and perhaps unable, to leave her marriage. To
make matters worse, the property that Nicky has bought
appears to be a financial disaster. But from the moment she
meets Meg, Nicky's life takes a new direction. Still, Meg has
her own tangled relationship with jealous, possessive Denise.
Second Guess by Rose Beecham: After a year's leave of
absence in New York, Detective Inspector Amanda Valentine
is looking forward to life in the slow lane in New Zealand.
Instead, she returns just in time for the most sensational homicide
of the year. The body of Sybil Knight, daughter of a former
Ambassador to the United States, has been found trussed and
batteredinaprivateroominalesbiansexclub.Ridealongwiththis
unusual, engaging cop on her latest case. You'll love Amanda
Valentine's unique brand of police procedure.
0
-----BULLETIN BOARD----Academic Dykes will have a potluck at 7pm on November 5
in Stillwater. The program will be reading of Marilyn Frye's
essay, Lesbian 'Sex"' from lesbian Philosophy and Culture.
Pride Network Inc. needs new individual members and representatives of organizations, clubs and businesses. PNI will
meet Thursday, October 5 at 7:00 pm at Gushers. For information call 340-3575.
Lesbian-only counseling group, Wednesday evenings. Call Jo
L. Soske, MEd/MHR/ICADC/NCC/LPC at 364-5708.
Herland Voice October, 1994
3
HSR RETREAT
OCT.
21 - 23
ARROWHEAD STATE PARK
Single
Annual
under
$6,500
Person's
Income
Retreat
Pre-registrati o n
per
peraon
$6,500
$13,250
$ 15
Household
Income
under
$13,300
$18,000
$26,000
$19,500
$ 3 5
$18,000
$19,500
$30,000
$ 4 5
$26,000
$30,000
$13,300
$ 2 5
$13,250
over
Annual
$ 60
over
$50,000
$50,000
Please choose the registration fee most appropriate for you based on the above guidelines. On-site registration will be $60 with no exceptions. The deadline
for pre-registration is Oct 19, 1994. Registration is non-refundable after October 20 .
Complete and return the pre-registration form to Herland, 2312 N.W. 39, Oklahoma City, OK 73112.
Name.____________________________ Phone__________
Address..._-----------~--~~~~~~~~~~--~----------City: _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _State_ _ _ _Zip_ _ _ __
Registration fee enclosed: _$15 _$25 _$35 _$60 _I need a scholarship to attend.
_ I'm enclosing an additional $_ _ to provide retreat scholarships.
_ I'm bringing __ children . (Girls of all ages and boys under 10 are welcome at the retreat.)
I would like to ride with someone.
_ I can help provide rides.
NonProlit Org.
U.S. Postage
PAID
Oklahoma City, Oklil.
2312 N.W. 39th Street
Oklahoma City, Oklahoma 73112
ADDRESS CORRECTION REQUESTED
RETURN POSTAGE GUARANTEED
Permit No. 861